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  1. Aalinaco

    The Undying Being(temp ) My first try at writing (Original)

    Space the chapters more. And add more commas. After farther there needs to be a comma. And farther should be replaced with further. Wont say im the best at writing. But that is the basic stuff. That was wrong in the last two chapters. And the other comments are correct, feels flimsy...
  2. Aalinaco

    A Bloodstained Shadow Over Brockton Bay

    Ive fallen in love.
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