So this is mostly cross posting, but I think it's time I posted here instead of lurking so enjoy...
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User | Total |
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Mager1221 | 5 |
Thanks, the unit precinct is mostly based on what Judgment had in Canon, the District stations is my idea, mostly inspired by how each District has their own Anti-Skill Station with School District 7 having multiple, basically District 7 is unique for having bigger Branch Offices that subdivided into sub-branches with a central District Station holding all the tactical, riot control and EOD teams.This is actually good, a weird mix of the original series, 'The Rooki' cop drama, and Call of Duty. Given how zany some parts of Toaru are it works though, especially given how useless Judgement and Anti-Skill were in the anime.
Only two real complaints:
- The unit/precinct designations in the first two chapters are likely going to confuse someone not familiar with how they're used in real life. Not sure how to actually fix that without an info dump though, so what can ya do.
- The latter half of the Info/Data chapter and chapter 3 felt like they weren't proofread as much as your first and second chapters. It wasn't as noticeable in chapter 3 but your Info chapter actually had paragraphs that were nearly identical one after another.
Overall this is definitely getting a watch and like from me. Looking forward to more if/when you get the chance.