because i CAN.

[littlebugs]

Spoiler: authors note

so I finally figured I'd stop being a dirty lurker and I wanted to write this story because I couldn't get this story out of my head so word of warning unless somebody offers to beta or something I'm really bad about puntion and stuff but I'm using a spell checker but it could miss something also I may butcher Characters sorry

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welp, this is not how I expected this day to go I should probably start with an intro my name or my old name I suppose is Matthew Aaron west weird name I know any way I am a transhumanist I belive in self-improvement wether that be through tech or just good old fashioned hard work the day I was dimensionally translocated I was a 7'2 bemoth of a man with an iq of 186 but now i coundnt be any farther from the truth I have a differnt name now and a vastly different body my new name is zion or scion considering who you ask thankfully my mind is mostly unchanged well other than how fast I think and most likely my emotions aswell how I look well i'am now 10792000000000000000 miles long bigger than size of the fucking GALAXY i'am also a fucking transdimensional thing spacewhalee entity i'am a fucking entity in fucking WORM something immediately stops and I realize I was panicking huh neat also alarming anyway yes I am zion oh and I forgot to mention every cell in my body is a shard there also the size of the moon I can see? more than on reality at the same time I'm currently sitting in a universe whose laws of physics never allowed it to form well anything other than energy which I guess is what I eat welp I am the closet this and a couple of other universes have to a god might as well enjoy myself first thing first I look for earth bet it the closet verse to me and I start making a body quickly check the date 2011 huh year before Taytay triggers speaking of which I lock down queen admin and get back to making my body since its a year before canon I make my body 15 make it 6'6 might be a little tall but whatever I like being tall and for my plan, I need to make it handsome so it gets a square jaw messy hair and of course I make it buff not that it matters considering it could crack the planet in half even if I make it a gangly fucker and when I finish the result is this

Spoiler: new body

first pic

in my old life, I was bi so I can say without a doubt I would fuck me anyway now to the bits my new cock because why not is 9 inches if it proves to be a problem I'll shrink it but I know this is humanly possible next the powers it was then I would facepalm if I could​

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LOCATION: somewhere over the Atlantic

the golden man stops and facepalms so hard he causes a sonic boom and then flew off to get that kitten out of the tree in Taiwan

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i am an idiot I give my new body ALL the powers it might as well be omnipotent it also has access to all shards currently active as well and now the fun I pause briefly to consider why I'm doing this and come to the conclusion easily its the only reason a creature of my power does well anything
BECAUSE
I
CAN.

 

[littlebugs]

ah I should have probably said this at the beginning but this is a badfic attempt also I broke my leg and haven't been in the mood to update