Beyond The Abyss (The Gamer Webtoon

[ArcheMage]

Hello Guys, i'm ArcheMage, and i'm still a new guy here , I just started doing my First story "Beyond The Abyss" Which is from the Gamer Webtoon, And i hope you guys can help me make it a better story by giving me your suggestions
https://royalroadl.com/fiction/15631/beyond-the-abyss This is the link to my story if you want to check it out, if you do enjoy it, please make sure to add it to your favorites, It really makes my day and motivate me to write better.

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I would often ask myself. What if the real world suddenly became a game? It was a preposterous question, perhaps even foolish, there was no questioning it. Life isn't a game and it will never be. Yet, it seems that today marks the day where i defied the impossible, as from today. My life became a game. I'm Han Jee-Han, and this is my story...

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1) The story will be nearly a different one, as it will be a Huge crossover between a lot of Manga / Anime / Light novels as well as some original ideas

2) most of the characters, although I've changed each one, some are just tiny details while others are more significant

3) The Gamer ability will be different, EXP and Leveling Up systems are going to be different, there's also new additions such as Perks and a Different Skill system on some skills

4) The Magic system is going to be a mix from a lot of other Crossover, but mainly it's going to be from Fate/Stay night

5) I accept any kind of criticism to my work , but i also expect an explanation for what's wrong, and if you can give me any suggestions i'll be sure to take it into consideration



Chapter 1 - Welcome to the Game (Just finished rewriting it)

https://royalroadl.com/fiction/15631/beyond-the-abyss/chapter/181374/welcome-to-the-game

Chapter 2 - The First Quest

https://royalroadl.com/fiction/15631/beyond-the-abyss/chapter/182268/the-first-quest

Chapter 3- Second Chance
https://royalroadl.com/fiction/15631/beyond-the-abyss/chapter/186719/second-chance

 

[Epitome of Eccentricity]

So, you're not gonna post it here? Only in rr, with their terrible site layout?

 

[moon so bright]

Any chance of you actually cross-posting the story?

 

[da3monh0st3d]

I would strongly recommend cross-posting. In my case it's because a lot of stories I follow I read using FanFicFare and otherwise only come here to comment, or see interesting non-OP posts in the threads where such applies.

 

[ArcheMage]

So, you're not gonna post it here? Only in rr, with their terrible site layout?

Click to shrink...

Thank you for your response, I'll try to post it in another websites,

Any chance of you actually cross-posting the story?

Click to shrink...

I will cross-post my story, i just have to re-write all of my chapters first

I would strongly recommend cross-posting. In my case it's because a lot of stories I follow I read using FanFicFare and otherwise only come here to comment, or see interesting non-OP posts in the threads where such applies.

Click to shrink...

I will, thank you for your suggestion

2/2/2018: Here you go guys The first chapter (Rewriten) Hope that you enjoy it

 

[Epitome of Eccentricity]

Mods frown on double posting and triple posting, unless it's a story post. I suggest you combine all of those.

 

[ArcheMage]

Welcome to the Game​

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​

I would often ask myself. What if the real world suddenly became a game? It was a preposterous question, perhaps even foolish, there was no questioning it, Life isn't a game and it will never be. But yet, I couldn't help but ponder on that question for what seemed like an eternity, and by then all of my surroundings would have vanished and I would be stuck between two realities: one that was imperfect, boring, and dull, no matter how much I do, I will never truly belong in it. The other was a utopia for someone like me, it was where I longed to be and where I wished to live. Was it possible to make that foolish notion a reality? Up to this day I still hold on to that idea, hoping that it isn't just a Fantasy despite all logic. But it seems that today marks the day where I defied the Impossible. As from today my Life became a Game

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Slowly and reluctantly I rouse from my heavy slumber as streaks of light penetrate the windows blinding my eyes, and the annoying sounds of my alarm disturbing my peaceful sleep, I sit up, wincing at the aches that littered all of my lower-back and neck //I really shouldn't have stayed up so late last-night, but it was so worth it// I thought, remembering the fun I had playing this RPG game, I was up for nearly 1 AM, and I obviously had to suffer the consequences of staying up so late. Slowly I drag my feet of the bed, rubbing the blurriness of my eyes as I was still half-asleep, suddenly I hear my mother call out to me "Jee-Han, breakfast is nearly ready!"
"Just a second mum" I shout to her //A bath definitely sounds good right now, I absolutely stink! // I thought, I hurry up, nearly tripping down the stairs. Slowly entering the bathroom, I leisurely walk into the shower, steam filling the room as I turned it on, the water dripping down my short brown hair, trickling down my back, soon after I deem myself clean enough I step out of the shower, then dry myself with a towel, after that I dress myself in my school attire that consisted of a simple dark blue shirt with rolled-up sleeves and a breast pocket, as well as some black pants and a pair of white sneakers, to top it all of I had to wear an uncomfortable red tie. Looking in the mirror I saw a familiar sight. Short dark brown hair and a pair of chestnut eyes that adorned my exceptionally pale face with a sharp jaw and angular cheekbones, I was like any other Korean guy, but what lured my attention was the sky-blue screen that appeared over my head

The Gamer
LVL 3
Han Jee-Han​

Crack Crack

I didn't pay attention to how the mirror was broken into a thousand glittering fragments, or even wince to how my knuckles were bleeding with the razor-sharp knives of glass sticking out of it. My eyes were still glued to the distorted vision of the rectangle screen over my head, I could see it clearly despite the spider-web cracks spreading all over the fragile mirror. I was feeling perplexed to say the least, this isn't supposed to happen? And I had absolutely no explanation whatsoever to this screen above me //Did playing that many hours made me hallucinate? Maybe it d-// my train of thought suddenly went astray as I was met with a screen, similar to the last one

As a result of your action, you have gained "Physical Endurance"

Physical Endurance (Passive) (Lvl 1)
Effects: Reduce Physical damage by 0.5% (Increases by 0.5 every level)​

//Thisisn'tsupposedtohappenit'simpossiblethenhowwhywhen?// I thought, nearly falling down. The thoughts rolled through my mind faster than I could even comprehend them. Suddenly a voice rang inside my mind

CALM

Emotionless and with no indication to its gender, it sent shivers down my spine due to how much…control it had over me, it only said a word, but the effect it had on me was obvious. My previously tense and anxious posture soon turned into a calm and composed one, and while my confusion definitely hasn't left my mind, I was able to think through it calmly, not affected by it in the very least, it was like all of my confusion and doubts have been put to the side by an invincible energy. Yet despite the obvious advantages of being able to think calmly through these kinds of situations I knew better

I wasn't like this…this wasn't me…for that I was sure of

//I should just clean up this whole mess, maybe then I'll be able to think this through clearly…// I thought, feeling perplexed and confused by what happened so far, everything was going so fast for me, it felt like that all I've known and believed in has gone through the drain due to just one incident. Reaching out to pick up a damp cloth I noticed something peculiar, it was my right hand //What the? I'm pretty sure that it wasn't like this a second ago// I thought, not even surprised anymore by the appearance of the unblemished fair skin with no indication that it was previously injured, whereas it was supposed to be a bloody mess with several shards sticking out in random, looking back to the mirror it seems that despite the spider-web crack covering all over the mirror there was no bloodstain whatsoever, running a hand through my hair //This is so weird…// I thought, not having that much energy left in me to just get surprised anymore. Picking up where I left off, I cleaned up the tiny shards that littered the floor and went towards the kitchen, my mind was still so full of questions: What was that screen? Where did it come from? Yet the more questions that popped up on my head the fewer answers I would seem to have, it was nearly driving me crazy and I just had to give up trying to understand what was going on, it's not like my life would change anyway.
Arriving at the kitchen, I immediately had to suppress a shiver, the feeling of the atmosphere changed, and that wasn't a good sign, I just hoped that nothing bad will happen, yet it seems that luck wasn't on my side as a voice rang out immediately "It seems to me that you caused quite the ruckus, mind telling me about what happened Jee-Han?" hearing the familiar voice made me gulp, slowly looking back, I saw a woman, specifically it was my mother, Han Jung-Sook. She's woman in her mid-forties yet her young appearance suggested otherwise, she was currently resting at the counter with an amused expression on her face, her chestnut eyes twinkling in delight, her midnight-blue hair was set in a loose ponytail by a white ribbon, she was wearing a baggy coral shirt as well as a long green skirt, and to top it off she has a pink apron on, but what took my attention was a familiar sky-blue screen

???
LVL???
Han Jung-Sook​

I could swear that my heart skipped a beat, soon after my fingers curled up into a fist. The seconds felt as if they were hours, stretching endlessly. It unnerved me, I thought that this Thing only changed me, but it didn't do just that

It changed how I perceived the whole world

My chain of thought suddenly went astray as my mother chuckled "Don't you worry, I'm not mad at you, although I am a bit annoyed as to what happened, so don't think that you're off the hook, you still need to buy a new mirror after school. Now go on, you're nearly late"

Ping
A Quest Has Appeared
The Gamer's Mother has request a replacement for the mirror after school
Objectives: Go to the Store
Buy A Mirror
Deliver it to your mother
Rewards: 30 EXP
Increased Closeness with Mother
Failure: Decreased Closeness with Mother
YES/NO
​

Despite priding myself as an expert at gaming, I definitely haven't expected this kind of screen popping up in front of me, intrigued by the option to accept I hesitantly reach with my finger out to push YES yet I haven't expected the slight resistance on my finger as soon as I pushed the button. Instantly the screen disappears, and I was met up with my mother's puzzled expression as she looked at me pointing at seemingly nothing "What are you doing?" she said confused by my weird actions. Berating myself for doing something so reckless, I simply laughed it out while saying "Hehehe, I thought I saw something weird, it must have been nothing. I'm nearly late to school so I have to go, see you later mom" Picking up my bag-back I simply rush out of the house in haste, oblivious to my mother's gaze narrowing in suspicion.

---

Time Skip​

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​

LVL 3
Gang Do-Jin

LVL 2
Na-Young

LVL 3
Hong Hyuk-Gi​

As soon as I arrived at my classroom I was met with this, Screens everywhere I look, and on every person's head, it was like I was truly living in a Video-Game. And it was grating on my nerves to say the least.
//These damn screens// I thought, glaring at them in hopes that they will burns to ashes, something not likely to happen //they're mocking me. If only would they go awa-//

Thud
"Ouch"
Thud

Physical Endurance (Passive) (Lvl 1) (Exp: 7.5%)
Effects: Reduce Physical damage by 0.5% (Increases by 0.5 every level)​

I was interrupted once again as a sudden gush of pain jolted through the top of my head a second time, wincing I start glaring at the damned screen //This is seriously not the time for this…// I thought, rubbing the bruise that was threatening to appear on my head. Suddenly, he appeared before me in all his grandeur.

Passionate Teacher
LVL???
Do Gi-Hyun
​

His attire consisted of a worn-down olive-green suit that wasn't buttoned, revealing a dark red long sleeve with a checkered pattern, he wore simple black pants. And his chiseled jaw was lifted with a small amused smile. His eyes were like an endless abyss, and his brown hair was shaggy and disheveled. It was our 42-year-old English teacher Do Gi-Hyun. And he's currently holding his favorite tool, an infamous rod that brought pain to every poor soul that was unlucky to meet it, including me. And to add a more salt to injury and mock us even more our sadistic teacher had 'With Love' Written on it.
"You lazy moron, I only ask one thing from you, and that's to do the right thing, but you just had to be an idiot" Despite his lazy posture, his tone was threatening, and his onyx eyes were set in the most frightening glare I've ever seen. I couldn't help but gulp, not looking forward to what kind of punishment that he had in mind for me
But despite all that I couldn't deny his words. He's a man that's passionate about his job, and that's to make sure that we don't stray off from the right path. There's a reason why the so-called delinquents are afraid of him, and that's because he's not afraid to beat the shit out of us just to give us a lesson. Once, a group of delinquents harbored a grudge on him, so they sought out to take revenge, in the end, they had their arms broken brutally, I actually witnessed how easily he defeated them on my way back home, it made me quite wary of him since then
"You're not even listening to me, are you?" His expression didn't indicate any sort anger, it was absolutely calm even. Nevertheless, I couldn't help the shiver that went down my spine seeing the wide Cheshire grin on his face, the kind that was so wide that looked like he would rather eat everyone than say hello, but the two words he said next terrified me than anything else in my life

"Count 15"
The only sounds that echoed throughout the hall were that of my girly screams, the sound of wood hitting flesh and the ever-annoying Ping

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Time Skip​

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​

"As you all know, the summer vacation ended not too long ago, as such I expect nearly all of you to not slack off and aim for a good university, as for those who already gave up, you should think about your future job. That is all" Said Do Gi-Hyun just before he left the room. Immediately a plain girl stood up, her name is Kim Yoo-Jin she had her shoulder-length green hair in a straight fringe and her, she had the kind of face that you could look at but still forget, but unlike the others, she is the very definition of a typical honor student, with large round blue-rimmed glasses and a thick book always at hand, she would always have the best grades in our high school, as such it was no surprise seeing that she's chosen as our class representative. Soon after she stood up, she spoke in a polite manner "Attention! Bow" Immediately all of the class responded with "Thank you teacher"

//Finally…// I couldn't help the slow sigh that escaped my dry lips, as if though my mind has finally caught up to what has happened. //Now to figure this all out// I was trying so hard to organize my thoughts, and finally, after what seemed like ages, I've finally come up with a semblance of an idea, soon, I was lost in my thoughts //First of all, these screens are obviously from a video-game that's only seen by me since nobody in here is freaking out. Second of all it seems to know the names of everyone I see// I thought that it was deriving that out of my memories to know the names, but it proved me otherwise when it showed me names of people I didn't know on my way to school //I'm still not sure whether that information is correct or not// I thought, making a mental note to try and figure out the certainty of that information, who knows, it might true //There's also the skill Physical Endurance, and from what I read, it seems to decrease the damage afflicted on me, although I can't be certain of this being true since the percentage in which the damage is decreased by is still way too small to make a difference that I can notice, but if it is true, then what's the limit for this skill? What Level is the max? And are there any other skills that I might have? // I pondered, obviously frustrated due to how many questions popped up in my head, it's like I would answer a question and three more will pop up, it was grating on my nerves //I need to figure out how to…summon these screens, maybe then I'll be able to figure it out// I thought, delighted for once seeing how I was able to find a clue //I know that this ability is based on a video-game, and I know that it reacts to physical actions due to how I was able to accept the quest with just a push of a button, although I don't think that I want someone to look at me like I'm crazy again. Maybe it requires a command like Activate or maybe Game On…// This was by far the most embarrassing moment of my life, I was glad that I wasn't required to speak out loud, I shudder to think of what would happen if I did that //Man…I wish there was some kind of guide for this type of stuff, I only need to summon something similar to the Status Screens In RPG Video-games // I thought dejectedly, it seemed like there was no hope for me until an answer came in the form of the screen that suddenly popped up

Name: Han Jee-Han

Title: The Gamer

Level: 3

EXP: (2/132)

HP: (325/325)

MP: (400/400)

STR: 8

VIT: 9

DEX: 11

INT: 12

WIS: 7

LUK: 9

Points: 15

Money: ₩ 15,000​

What I was seeing was quite unbelievable, absolutely shocking really, my mind was sent reeling, unable to comprehend the images that were sent by my eyes, I didn't know whether I was Happy, Shocked, or Awed by what I was seeing

CALM

Soon after, a familiar calmness overtook my mind, rendering all my emotions dull and gray, and I was stuck with only feeling a calm acceptance of my situation.

My life became a Game

Once I was able to think through all of this ordeal calmly, I immediately went into observing for any kind of useful information I could gather about my ability //HP is most likely Health Points, And MP is most commonly known as…Mana points// I quickly shook these thoughts out of my head, trying to ignore the fact that I'm no longer a normal human, humans don't have HP that indicates their Well-being, Or have magic, it was supposed to be a Fantasy, but yet the screen in front proved otherwise. Focusing on the rest of the screen I continued further analyzing them //These stats are eerily similar to a Traditional RPG, STR obviously indicates Strength, which affects your Physical strength, DEX is most likely dexterity, which most probably affects your speed, VIT is obviously Vitality, which means that it has an impact on how much HP and Stamina you have, INT is commonly known as Intelligence, which improves memorization ability and MP, WIS is probably Wisdom, and it impacts your ability to make good decision, LUK means Luck, which improves your Critical hit chance…I suppose that 10 is the average considering that I'm not exactly the strongest in my class and I tend to do quite reckless stuff, but I am quite smart and playing Video-Games a lot tend to make your reflexes a bit better than average, not to mention those 15 points that I have currently, I need to find a private place where I can use them since I don't know whether they truly improve my stats or not, I just need to be cautious // I thought. Suddenly a new screen popped up

Due to your deduction, your INT has increased by 1

Due to making a wise choice, your WIS has increased by 1

WIS:7→8
INT: 12→13
MP: (400/400) → (410/410)
​

//Amazing…so I can actually improve my stats instead of using points, even my MP increased by 10// I thought, feeling amazed by what possibilities this ability opened up for me, I felt like I truly had a way of changing my life. but suddenly my happy thoughts came to a halt as I felt conflicted. I honestly didn't know what I was supposed to do with this kind of knowledge: Was I born with this ability? If so then why did it only show up now? And if not, then who gave me this ability? And why? Was I the only one with Magic? Should I tell someone about it? If so then who? Who can I trust with this kind of secret? But most importantly I thought

//What will happen to me from now on? //

"Mind telling me what's going on your mind Jee-Han, did the teacher hit your head way too hard? Shouldn't you know about his temper by now" Said a familiar teasing voice, looking back I saw him.

Chunbumoon's Heir
Level 28
Shin Sun-II​

He's a young man in his late-teens wearing the same uniform as I do. His hair is a spiky green that somehow defied gravity, while two pools of green adorned his semi-permanently closed eyes. His name is Shin Sun-II and he's been my best friend for the last decade. His lips were set in a cheeky smile and he had his hand on my shoulder, as if though he was amused by my pain //Damn bastard…// I thought, slapping away his hand while looking away "Tch, it's nothing you need to worry about" I muttered, turning my head in hopes that he won't see my shock at the screen that just popped up

Through repeated Observation, A skill to find the Target's Information 'Observe' has been Created​

I felt absolutely delighted. I got my Second Skill! and it seems so useful, not to mention that it's my first Active Skill, meaning that I can activate it manually //I have to try it…// I thought, not able to contain in my giddiness, looking at Sun-II I thought //I'll just try this on him…// Slowly I mutter "Observe"

Name: Shin Sung-II

Level: 28

Title: -Chunbumoon's Heir
-The One Who Endeavors

Class: Fighter (Ki)

Job: High School 2nd year

Race: Human

Gender: Male

Age: 18

HP: ?????

MP: 1400

STR: ??

VIT: ??

DEX: ??

INT: ??

WIS: 14

LUK: ??​

At first, I was confused, thinking that it must have been a trick of the light, either that or my skill didn't work, after all it's preposterous to think that my best-friend had over nine times my level and over 3 times my mana, not to mention the kind of Class and Title he has. Right then I wished for nothing more than for my mind to simply shut-down, sparing me all of this confusion and hurt, and yet, as the time passed, so did my grim realization. This is real //He's hiding something from me…// I thought, and it honestly broke my heart, I believed that he was the only person that won't lie to me, the only person who will forever be truthful to me, and yet here he is, lying to me, his best friend, for this whole time, and I knew that if I didn't have this ability he would have continued doing so without me knowing //That bastard…how dare he…aren't we best friends?// I thought, the anger bubbling in my chest was faster than magma but just as destructive, threatening to come out, until suddenly

CALM

I have never been so grateful for the sea of calm that washed away all of my anger, it felt like there was a mental barrier over my emotions. //M-maybe he had a reason for lying, I can't be sure of that, but I have to figure this out, and to do that I need to be honest with him and tell him about my ability, after all I can't expect of him to tell me the truth with me not doing the same// I thought, looking back to him I ask "Hey…Sun-II, do you want to go to the café that opened recently, my treat" Tense silence issued between us as soon as I finished my question, it was so tense that you could probably cut it with a knife, and I was instantly worried that he might have actually found out about my ability, until he suddenly said with the most serious tone he could ever muster, but the hint of amusement was still clear in his voice "Who are you and what have you done to Jee-Han" The previous tense atmosphere immediately vanished without a trace, replaced with a familiar one where we would always bicker, and this time didn't feel any bit different. It honestly made all my pent-up anger just vanish, and I could feel the familiar toothy grin stretching its way all across my face. I couldn't help but feel like everything was back to normal

"Tch, I cannot believe that you said that to your best friend when he just offered you such a generous offer" I said, acting dramatically as if he had committed a horrendous crime, and immediately as I expected, Sun-II responded with a smug smirk plastered to his face "I haven't refused your offer you know, so let's not waste anymore time, a delicious strawberry cake is waiting for me-I mean us'" I was slightly concerned by the dangerous glint in his eyes //I hope this doesn't bite me in the ass…// I thought, dreading the loss of all of my money. Instantly I was dragged off by my best friend

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Time Skip​

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//What a glutton…// I thought, dumbfounded by how much food the green-haired male had inhaled, it was like he had an empty black hole for a stomach, and he would have probably continued doing so if I hadn't stopped him //But my poor wallet…// I thought, noticing how light it became as soon as I paid for all the food Sun-II ate. Looking back to him I was quite annoyed by how he was leaning back, patting his stomach in contentment, soon he looked at me while saying in delight "You're really the best Jee-Han, that cake was so good. Thanks" Staring at him skeptically I ask "Finally done?" I wasn't willing to part with the rest of my money //Mom will probably kill me for wasting all of it// I thought, shivering at the thought. Immediately, Sun-II reassures me by laughing obnoxiously "It's ok, have a bit of trust in me" Soon after he looked at me with a concerned gaze and said "Are you okay though? You've been spacing out a lot lately" I was honestly inclined to just tell him the truth, but I could only stand still and watch, tempted yet paralyzed to do anything. Until Suddenly
"You can rely on me you know, I only want to help you" His sincere eyes bore into mine as if he was truly trying to convince me that he was earnest about helping me, and I found it hard to not outright tell him about everything that happened to me. The dread and anxiety sapped my body and mind, and I could only let out a shaky sigh in my frozen state as my mouth suddenly felt dry and my heart ricocheted against my chest more forcefully than it usually did.

CALM

Closing my eyes, I rehearse this conversation over a thousand time in my head, until I finally decided. This has to end, I need to tell him. Raising my head, I immediately tell him before my second thoughts get the better of me again

"M-my life is a game"