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Funny Things You Do While Zoned Out

GiftofLove

A Gift From The Heart
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Just like it says. Share some of the amusing stuff you've done while not paying attention because you're thinking of something else!



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Today after my shower I opened up my the bathroom cabinet to get out my shaving supplies, as is my routine. As I slide the door open my mind wanders. This is a repetitive task that I perform every day after all. No real reason for the brain to be engaged. Just put some shaving cream in the hand and apply it. Not hard.

Right?

So I begin to plan what I'm going to make for dinner, mentally reviewing what I have in the fridge and taking stock of what I have to work with in the pantry.

Wait a minute, my shaving cream doesn't feel right . . . .

I look in my hand and find not my can of shaving cream, but instead a stick of deodorant.

I've just rubbed a good amount of Old Spice into my face.

My face now smells extremely handsome.
 
I have an awful habit of zoning out while I walk, so a very common sight is me suddenly stopping to spin around and go back to whatever it is that I passed by. I do it constantly at work.
 
This was a long time ago, when I was still in high school.

Got up in the morning. Time for breakfast before more sucky schoolwork.

Pour me some cereal because I didn't feel like putting in the effort for toast. Reached into the fridge to pour myself some milk, but when I came back to focus I was pouring cherry Kool-Aid into my cereal.

Surprisingly good.
 
This was a long time ago, when I was still in high school.

Got up in the morning. Time for breakfast before more sucky schoolwork.

Pour me some cereal because I didn't feel like putting in the effort for toast. Reached into the fridge to pour myself some milk, but when I came back to focus I was pouring cherry Kool-Aid into my cereal.

Surprisingly good.

My mother did exactly that - even the same flavor - to my brother when we were little. She was so tired, but it was hilarious.
 
I have an awful habit of zoning out while I walk, so a very common sight is me suddenly stopping to spin around and go back to whatever it is that I passed by. I do it constantly at work.
I used to do that too. This became more noticeable once I started driving, and would constantly go to the wrong places or miss my exits. I eventually found out this was because I had epilepsy.
 
Pull up your chairs friends, today I have a story of grand derp to tell.



So rent was do yesterday, and I forgot all about it. This morning I got up early and met my landlord practically at the door of their establishment. Since the building they operate from happens to be halfway on the other side of town, I drove so as to not miss any of my classes.

On the way back I had a brilliant idea. Usually I walk or take the bus around campus to save on gas (and get a little exercise), but I needed to stop by one of the libraries to use a scanner before class. I knew it would be a bitch and a half to stop at the library and get to class on time on foot. I decide that since one of my classes happens to be in the same building as one of the libraries, I'll just park there and drive home.

This would normally be a great plan, and would save me a bit of a walk back to my apartment. Except that I was thinking of my schedule for tomorrow.

I in fact did not have a class near the library today.

To add fun, the bus stops making rounds by the time my last class lets out on Monday-Wednesdays.

I can't leave my car in the parking lot or I'll get a ticket.

In my infinite wisdom I forced myself to walk two extra miles back to my car all in the name of saving time walking home.

Fuck my life.
 
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Tonight I have made a painful mistake.




I got too lax, and forgot that the floors of my apartment are covered in weird smooth spots. When you step on one of these, your foot goes sliding whether you're wearing socks or not.

Generally I have the balance of a wild cat, so it's not a problem.

I somehow managed to put both of my feet in smooth spots. This probably still wouldn't be a problem normally. Except that I was in the bathroom taking a leak.

I just did the splits with the toilet in the middle. Cracked my goods on the porcelain throne. FML, almost fainted.
 
I tend to sing aloud. In Japanese. It doesn't help any that some very common words of that language are very close to curse words of Portuguese.

...I had once been stopped by an elder on the street telling me to stop listening to "Proibidão" which is a local slang for very impolite, indecent and banned funk music.


I have once assembled my computer after cleaning it, then put it back on its spot at my desk (which requires unplugging everything as one would expect, but also re-routing all cables, two desks, two monitors, Keyboard, mouse, mousepads... essentially, everything, while working around two desks attached to the wall.)

After everything was done... I found out I forgot to plug power on the HDDs. It was a long day.


Recently, I have been working as an warehouse assistant manager, where we have lots of electric material. I have more than once measured heavy wire for hours... only to forget the length white getting the tag to write it.
 
Recently, I have been working as an warehouse assistant manager, where we have lots of electric material. I have more than once measured heavy wire for hours... only to forget the length white getting the tag to write it.

And that is why I don't rely on my actual memory for things like this. Writing it down on some scrap paper, or even my hand is the best option if I don't have a digital counter doing it for me.
 
And that is why I don't rely on my actual memory for things like this. Writing it down on some scrap paper, or even my hand is the best option if I don't have a digital counter doing it for me.
I don't think you got it. I release the wire to get pen and paper, and then forget the number. Yup, that bad.
 
Today I lost my car on campus.

Like, I had no idea which parking lot I left it in, let alone where I left it therein.
 

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