Happy Horrogan's Terror Imporium and Family Funtime Motel. [Original Open Writing Project]

[TripleMRed]

Yelp Review for : Happy Horrorgan's Terror Imperium and Family Funtime Motel.


I know we've all heard the stories of 'Happy Horrorgan's', however I had little choice but to stay in one of their motels after I suffered an engine failure on my way by one. To start off, I am displeased to confirm that the rumors are true and that Happy Horrorgan's is home to a Menagerie of Ghosts, Goblins, Ghouls, and worst of all, Telemarketers. The first night while I waited for my car to be fixed they gave me a complementary scare when I opened the door to the closet, only to find a portal to the netherworld beckoning me to enter. Knowing this would doom the remainder of my stay to the Torment Nexus, I wisely decided to ignore the disembodied voices of my loved ones calling me into it and closed the closet door, deciding to just keep my clothes in my luggage. The attempt at a bath was ruined when the faucet began to spill out fresh blood, and I had to endure the boiling shower to get clean for the night.

My second day of the stay was little better: I was nearly strangled to death by a rogue noose, almost fell victim to a nearby pack of Werewolves, and was forced to sit through a three hour Telemarkethon on pain of losing my eternal soul to the marketing demons. I tried to eat from the complementary bed and breakfast made available, but had to subsist on a diet of stale bagels and potentially expired creamed of cheese [note, not cream cheese, the product was labeled 'Creamed of Cheese'. What does that even mean?] as I could not bare the thought of having to eat the remains of my family, who were still on the other side of the country so I didn't want to risk finding out what their doubles were made of or who they were made from.

The third day of my stay was the best, as I got a complementary stay at the spa where the local message chair revealed itself to be a mad scientists former experiment, whereupon it removed my spine and replaced it and three quarters of my skeletal system with a reinforced carbide polymer that was a quarter of the weight and three times as strong as normal bones. So, you know, got to take what wins you can get.

Finally, on the day my car was fixed, the motel's staff tearfully gave me a goodbye party by imploding the motel, disappearing it and all souls within to the next sphere of existence. I would leave a lower rating, but they left a single mint chocolate in my car as a goodbye gift, so that bumped it up a few points.

Final rating: 3/5, it was [not] okay.


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(Howdy, all! My name is TripleMRed, and to kick off the upcoming Halloween this year, I'm opening this thread to be an open house world building project.

The project will revolve around the titular franchise of motels, liminal places where the supernatural world and mundane world collide in a wellspring of dark comedy. Anyone interested in contributing can feel free to do so as long as a few rules are followed.

The main entries of the project will be divided between 'Reviews', 'Stories', and 'Reports'. Reviews, like this one up above to get us started, are as they say: In universe reviews written by either normal people [like this first one] or by liminal beings as they share their experiences with the motel and the insanity within. Whether they enjoyed their time, hated it, or anything in between, feel free to make it however you want as long as it follows a review format.

The next one, stories, are short stories and the like involving POV experiences with the franchise and its nightmarish whimsy 'on the ground'. Whether the characters are normal, liminal, employee or attendee, it's all up to you!

Finally, reports are 'official' files written by government bodies in regards to 'incidents' at any of these locations. The fun part is, like the previous mentioned types for the world building project, a report can be written in the style of normal human agents, or from the perspective of whatever governmental bodies exist in the paranormal world as they handle incidents from their perspectives.

This project is one I won't personally be filling out a lot, aside from the occasional canonical entry to set the tone, but I will be keeping an eye on the project to give it some level of moderation so that the basic rules are being followed to make a given story canonical.

One more thing: The 'rules' of this world will be fleshed out as we build it up through new entries and flesh out the world, but some ground rules are to be set so we are all on the same page on what is and isn't allowed within the premises of Happy Horrorgans:

Rule 1: Attendees of a Happy Horrorgan location cannot die. Those that suffer horrific injury as a guest will wake up in their rooms, whole and healthy, usually with some kind of complementary 'apology' gift from the franchise for the trouble, though whether the gift is actually safe or pleasant by human standards is up for you to decide! Note, this only covers death: Unwitting getting into a Contract with a supernatural entity is still fair game.

Rule 2: Just as Rule 1 implies, only Attendees are truly safe on the premises. Anyone, whether human or liminal, who is in the area but not a Guest will be free game to be hurt and die for real, so feel free to use that as you see fit.

Rule 3: Many, but not all, normal people have heard of Happy Horrogans, but evidence supporting its existence is limited due to the supernatural elements messing up any attempts to record it, with only reviews and the rare recovered government recording making it out unaltered. Feel free to get creative with some of the ways evidence is tampered with, if you so desire to get something like that involved!

Rule 4: While many of the liminal creatures at Happy Horrogan's are, indeed, dangerous to humans, most are not intentionally dangerous. As such, aside from the actively malevolent forces like the Telemarketers and the like, if a liminal is being dangerous to a human, have it be because their instincts or the nature of their existence is what's causing the problem. After all, most of them staying here are guests, same as the humans, and from their perspectives they are the normal ones. And normal people don't go staying at motels to cause trouble or hurt others, now do they?

Rule 5: Lastly, while not completely set in stone, the premise of setting is horror-comedy rather than pure horror like other supernatural world building projects. While there will naturally be some stories that can, and should feel free to, go into full horror territory, the situation of most should have an air of dark-humor to it all as a result of the supernatural horrific elements melding with the sheer mundanity the 'locals' treat the place and each other for some fun. If you want to have some unironic wholesomeness too, don't be afraid to do so!

That's about all I'll do for setting the stage for this littler world building project I'm opening up for a free for all, so anyone interested, please remember to be respectful to one another's work, follow the basic rules and outlines above to be officially inundated into 'canon', and most of all, have fun!)