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[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

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Cardin: "Damnit you made it weird! You made it weird! I just wanted to bully you!"

Velvet: "Oh? So you're not attracted to me at all and just wanted to bully me?"

Cardin: "Y-Yeah..."

Velvet: "Me. A smoking hot, breedable Bunny girl?"

Cardin: "I-I mean, there were no sexual thoughts in my head when I tried to bully you! Honest!"

Velvet: "Reallyyy? Not even one?"

Cardin: "N-NO! NOT EVEN ONE!"

Velvet: smirk "No thoughts about bullying me... Making me do whatever you wanted... Having me completely at your mercy... Not so much as one. Single. Solitary. Sexual thought?"

Cardin: blush, sigh "... Godsdamnit."

Velvet: "HA! I KNEW IT!"

- - -

It might tie back into the old meme: "Never ask a racial supremacist the ethnicity of his girlfriend."
 
Ozpin Makes Things Worse
Weird random idea.

Glynda: Ozpin. You need to stop.

Ozpin: I have no idea what you mean.

*Waves hand and a random student turns into a badger before turning back*

Glynda: that! You need to stop giving people the ability to turn into animals!

Ozpin: it's just one or two....hundred.

Glynda: I'm pretty sure you hit a few actual animals because I don't remember all these students.

Ozpin: glynda please, I'd like to think I'm a bit more selective than that.


- cut to rwby's room -

* Absolutely shredded Male corgi faunus laying stretched out across Blake's bed*

Zwei: so pretty kitty do you want to play with me now?
 
White Sun: Venting
One more random bit for today before I go lie down.

Set after the Dance...

- - -


Weiss Schnee had worked very hard to cultivate patience. Patience went with control, and control was paramount. It had been a core part of her for her entire life.

Beacon had tested that control, severely. Every single one of her buttons was jammed, jabbed, and slammed on. She had had to re-evaluate herself in many ways. To change.

And as she stormed out of her dorm room out into the night, stomping and gritting her teeth, she felt like none of it had fucking mattered!

She used her incredible speed to get all the way out to a balcony near the unoccupied part of the dorms. She went outside, took a deep breath... And kicked the railing.

"Fuck Blake Belladonna!" She snarled, kicking the railing pillar over and over, until the pain made her stop. She leaned against the railing, gripping it and panting hard to regain her calm. To regain her control.

Tears threatened to fall from her eyes. She blinked furiously, tried to keep them back...

Someone offered a handkerchief. She took it without thinking, as though she was back in the family mansion in Atlas. She dabbed her eyes, careful to not further ruin her makeup.

"Th-Thank you," she said to her benefactor.

"No problem."

She lowered her handkerchief, and looked to her left. Perched on the railing was a familiar blonde monkey Faunus, still with his white shirt wide open. She blinked in confusion as Sun Wukong gave her a small smile.

"Wha-What are you doing here?" She demanded, pulling back out of instinct. He held up his hands.

"Hey, hey! Take it easy! I was just out for some exercise, Princess!"

Weiss opened her mouth to yell some more... Then she slowly closed her mouth and looked away.

"I... Sorry," she murmured, "It... I'm not mad at you. Really."

"Blake, right?" Sun asked. Weiss glanced back at him. There was... A knowing look on his face.

"Yes," she agreed. She sighed softly. "It's... Stupid. I don't have a problem with her as a Faunus. Not really. I promise."

"It's just that most Faunus you've met were part of the White Fang," Sun said with a nod. She stared at him, and he shrugged. "Am I wrong?"

"... No," she admitted. She closed her eyes and sighed softly. "I... I am sorry. But..." She opened her eyes and glared out at the night.

Sun leaned forward.

"You want to talk about it?"

Weiss glanced at him, and looked back out at the stars.

"I... I'm not sure if I can-"

"Hey," Sun said, spreading his arms wide with a smile, "I've got a thick skin. I can take it. Besides," He sighed, "I owe you for Neptune."

Weiss scowled deeply.

"No... No, those were his choices," she muttered, "I-I don't blame you for him being... Him."

Sun chuckled.

"Yeah, but... I could do a better job as team leader," he said, "Keep him from getting himself killed, at least. Anyway, enough about him. What about you?"

"Aren't you with Blake?" Weiss countered. "You sure you want me to talk badly of your girlfriend?"

Sun shook his head with a sad smile.

"She's not my girlfriend. She made that clear."

Weiss blinked, then looked away again.

"Oh... Sorry," she murmured.

"It's better to just get this stuff out, ya know?" Sun asked, scratching the back of his head, "Me, I'm live and let live. You need to vent? I'll listen. You don't want me around? I'll go."

Weiss licked her lips. She stared out at the stars again. Cold, distant, always beautiful. She sucked in a breath through her nostrils, and let it go.

"... She always acts like she's the wounded party, and I am never an equal," she started, "As if the White Fang didn't kill members of my family. As though they haven't tried to kidnap me and my family members. As if they haven't threatened..."

She trailed off, going pale. She shuddered. Sun reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. She started and looked at him. He didn't pull back. His face was compassionate.

"You're right. That's not fair," he said. "You didn't do the terrible things your father did."

Weiss opened her mouth, but her throat was choked with emotion. She blinked back more tears, and dabbed her eyes again.

"I... Thank you," she said quietly, "I-I... I don't approve of what he does. He's... He's a monster to everyone." She sighed. "I want to stop it. I want to change it. I just... I don't really know how."

Sun nodded, smiling warmly.

"That sucks," he said succinctly. She snorted in a most unladylike manner.

"It... Yes, quite," she managed. Sun leaned back, lowering his legs to sit on the railing. His tail wagged a bit as he smiled at her. She managed to smile back.

"She-She can be so self-righteous," she went on, "Like she didn't do bad things! I-I know she's trying to repent! I understand that! But she makes it so hard..."

Sun sighed and nodded.

"Yeah. She keeps lecturing about how the White Fang wasn't supposed to be like this. Well, nobody put guns to their heads to bomb trains. Nobody made them bully Faunus who didn't go along with their bullshit."

"They-They do that kind of stuff to Faunus too?" Weiss asked. Sun nodded.

"Yeah. Lot of assholes will take any excuse to hurt people and feel justified," he snorted, "My best friends are humans. When I was orphaned in Vacuo, a human monk is the one who found and raised me. White Fang members thinks that makes me a bad Faunus. So screw 'em."

"What happened to your parents...?" Weiss asked, then winced. "Sorry-"

"No, it's okay," Sun sighed, shrugging. "Tang-That's the monk-found me in a village hit by Grimm and bandits when I was a baby. Everyone else was dead."

Weiss stared at him in sorrow. He smiled wanly and shrugged.

"Could have been worse," he said, "Tang raised me like his own, with some other orphans he had found. We went around collecting alms for the poor, tending shrines, teaching martial arts. He trained me and my bros, Zhu and Sha. We were all Faunus kids, but he didn't care; He loves us all, and we love him. He had wanted me to become a monk too, but..." He chuckled. "I wanted adventure. He had an old friend at Haven Academy, one of the teachers, and got me a scholarship. So, here I am, all thanks to a kindly human."

"I... I'm really sorry," Weiss murmured. "I... It's amazing that you're still able to laugh and smile after all that."

Sun beamed at her, his tail forming a curl.

"Tang's like the best dad a boy could have ever had! And I grew up with two great brothers! I got to go see the world, meet some great friends, and have great fights!" He winked at her. "And meet some pretty girls, too."

Her cheeks burned red. She shook her head.

"I-Don't flirt, please."

Sun blinked in confusion.

"Who's flirting? I'm just being honest," he said. Weiss sighed and looked away.

"Ugh, do you have to do that?" She grumbled.

"It's my honest feelings," he said firmly with a nod.

"Well... Thank you," she said. She turned and smiled shyly at him. "It... It occurs to me I haven't really talked to you before. I'm sorry about that."

Sun waved his hand.

"Nah, don't worry about it," he said. "I'm just glad I can talk about Blake. I mean... I really like her and all, but..." He sighed and shrugged. "She doesn't seem to like me the same way."

"Then she's an idiot," Weiss stated firmly. Sun glanced at her, and grinned.

"Sure you're not just saying that because of my abs, Princess?"

"I'm sure, and stop calling me that!" She retorted. Sun chuckled.

"As the Princess demands."

"Ugh!" Weiss grunted. "You're so..." She scowled. "You're not very polite for a boy raised by a monk."

"I never said I was a great student," Sun replied with a laugh and wink. Weiss fought another smile.

"I suppose that's fair..."

- - -

Again, just a bit of randomness before I fall over. I don't even know if it's any good. So if it's not? Sorry.

Yes I made Sun's backstory something out of "Journey to the West" because that's the easiest goal to make and RT didn't even seem to take the shot. So I did.
 
Weiss Gets a Reality Check
Weiss gets a reality check.

*Rby and jnpr stare at a unresponsive Weiss*

Jaune: and she's been just starting at her scroll for how long?

Ruby: two hours! I don't even think I've seen her blink.

Ren: that's concerning. We should handle this delic-

Nora: HI WEISS what's up?

*Weiss jumps like a startled cat*

Weiss: oh hello everyone.

Yang: hey Weiss cream, you doing ok.

Weiss: not really no.

*Shows everyone a news article on her phone*

Article: Whitley schnee joins the white fang! The secrets of his punk rock band and faunus harem revealed!

Blake: what?

Ruby: it's ok Weiss I'm sure it's all a misunderstanding.

Blake: what?

Weiss: but I thought I was the rebel!

*Everyone except Weiss and Blake laughs*

Yang: oh brothers my sides!

Weiss: and what's so funny about that?

Ruby: Weiss you go to bed at 8 pm every night.

Nora: you took extra credit work for a class you don't even take.

Ren: you gave yourself detention for coughing in class once.

Weiss: I'm not seeing your point.

Yang: you're as much a rebel as pyrrha is.

Weiss:...oh.....

Ruby: would some coffee and cake help you feel better?

Weiss:....yes.

*Everyone except Blake leaves the room*

Blake: what?
 
White Sun: Venting Add On
He had one last little bit for this when he should have been sleeping!

- - -


The next morning, Blake was with most of her team in the cafeteria, picking at her food in distraction. Weiss wasn't there and neither was Sun. And both were on her mind.

Maybe I should apologize to Sun. I need to explain I'm not looking for a relationship right now, not after what happened with Adam. Maybe I was... Too hard on him, She thought, And maybe I should go a little easier on Weiss. She doesn't mean to be insensitive, but-

She looked up from the breakfast table and sees Sun walking with Weiss hanging off his arm. The entire cafeteria went silent, all eyes on the apparently couple.

"What...?" Jaune mumbled. He had given up hitting on Weiss, but this was a shock to him.

"The fuck?!" Blake hissed, clenching her hand around her fork as hard as she could.

Weiss looked around the table, smiling prettily at her team.

"Good morning, Ruby! Good morning, Yang!" A smirk developed on her face as her eyes came to rest on Blake. "Good morning, Blake. How are you doing? I was just talking with Sun. He was kind enough to escort me to breakfast."

Blake grit her teeth.

"Was he?" She hissed.

Sun beamed happily.

"Yup! We're friends now!"

"Very good friends," Weiss said, practically purring.

"Ooh, plot twist!" Nora gasped over the rage pounding in all four of Blake's ears!

Weiss turned to Sun, and stood up on tiptoes.

"Thank you, Sun." She gave him a peck on the cheek. "Have a good day!"

Sun smiled back, a mild blush on his tanned cheeks.

"Thanks Weiss. Appreciate it! Later!" He turned and waved, heading to his team's table. Neptune was staring daggers at Sun, which the monkey Faunus didn't even seem to notice!

The Schnee heiress sat down next to the gaping Ruby, somehow looking more smug than the actual catgirl.

"So! What's for breakfast?" She asked brightly.

"You-Wha-Why-?!" Blake tried. Weiss's smirk became positively deadly.

"Well, you're always telling me to be more open-minded," she said, almost sing-song, "Aren't you glad I'm expanding my horizons?"

"Good on you, Weiss!" Ruby cheered.

"But you... He... You...!" Blake sputtered.

Yang patted Blake on the shoulder, but clearly was trying not to laugh.

"Snooze you lose, Kitty Cat."
 
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I am trying very hard not to write anything today because I've been writing like a maniac this last week due to stress. I'm approaching burnout. So I'm just taking a break today. You guys write something please. Even if it sucks, it'll help me recover.

Take all the time you need. We are not going anywhere. This is free and we will not force you to write non stop.
 
What do you think of a Mad Scientist Jaune? would he work in RWBY? Granted, when you go full on World of Remnant on it so it makes sense(like Girl Genius, how it is a world where everyone can become a Mad Scientist or has potential for the Spark of Madness) which means militias are more prevalent as well as lots of city states among the frontiers.

edit. The presence of Mad Scientists and their Deadly experiments ALONG WITH THE GRIMM ALSO A ALWAYS PRESENT THREAT also means that at least every nation as well as frontier City states focus on having well regulated militias/Well Equipped Militias.

Also, the Arc Family line is famous for being a bloodline of Sparks, but are more of a "preferred obsession's for the individual, but all also have a obsession to be a Heroic Adventurer Spark" sort of deal for them. Meaning that the Arc Statue in the Courtyard of Beacon has both a sword and a raygun.

for extra hilarity points, this somewhat good and somewhat bad thing of the Mad Scientist Syndrome was made by the God of Darkness as a "curse".
 
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What do you think of a Mad Scientist Jaune? would he work in RWBY? Granted, when you go full on World of Remnant on it so it makes sense(like Girl Genius, how it is a world where everyone can become a Mad Scientist or has potential for the Spark of Madness) which means militias are more prevalent as well as lots of city states among the frontiers.

I think it could be a lot of fun. And he's best buddies with Ruby INSTANTLY.
 
I think it could be a lot of fun. And he's best buddies with Ruby INSTANTLY.

Jaune: You're not thinking big enough! Yes, a scythe-sniper is nice... But it could also be a rocket launcher! That also shoots lasers and acid! And the scythe blade is a chainsaw AND electrified!

Ruby: I love you. Let's get married and have twenty babies.
 
So, if guns turn Jaune into SERGEANT JAUNE ARC, HERO OF SUPER REMNANT! What do other weapons do to him when he holds them?

A spear?

A hammer?

A rapier?

A scythe?
 
actually, how about, certain weapons and a hat make the Arcs behave in a certain way.

Halbeards, Spears and Knightly armaments and Knight helms turn him into a Knight type Warrior Poet, plus that Jaune likes to offhand handcannon type sidearms.

in regards to SARGENT JAUNE ARC, I propose that any Remenant Clone weapon of 20th Century America and modern stuff witha either a NotGI helmet or aDrill Sergent hat makes him go Sargent Mode.

Cowboy Jaune is Cowboy hat and bolt actions, break actions, pump actions, lever actions, singe action revolvers, early semi automatics like the Mauser pistol, think Hunt Showdown the game arsenal, that turns Jaune into Cowboy, ether John Wayne or Clint Eastwood style.

on the other hand, a not-Colt1911 and a fedora turn Jaune into a Hard Boiled Film Noir Detective.

a bandana and a staff turn Jaune into a martial arrtist type dude, so this Jaune and Ren could be chilling together and then go fight.

possibilities are endless.
 
Penny invites Ruby over to meet her family.

Penny: and these are my sisters! Nickle, dime, and quarter.

Ruby: but why?

Penny: father usually names us after arguing with the council over budget.

...is it telling my first thought was "wait, is Quarter like from 'draw and quarter's? Wow, papa Polendina is being driven bloodthirsty by budget meetings."
Then I realized it actually meant the 25 cent coin.
 
...is it telling my first thought was "wait, is Quarter like from 'draw and quarter's? Wow, papa Polendina is being driven bloodthirsty by budget meetings."
Then I realized it actually meant the 25 cent coin.

. . . . hmmmmm. . . .

"this will cost us a pretty penny"

"stop trying to nickle and dime the populace"

"this is so bad that people would not give even a quarter"

context matters, how would a quarter work in a budget discussion?
 
I did have a thought (and I may yet do a short) for a Jaune who was a Jedi.

I've seen this done before but many such stories fail to keep Jaune in character.

For my take, his grandmother or grandfather (haven't decided) was a Jedi who crashlanded on Remnant and has kept a low profile. Maybe Remnant is near the Sith Empire during the Old Republic days, maybe this survivor fled Order 66: There are any number of situations it might work for.

Bottom line, Jaune's family is full of Force sensitives, but his potential was strongest and he was going into a career where training would most benefit him. However, his grandparent trained him a bit and made it clear he could NOT reveal himself unless there was no other choice to save lives. Because once Jaune is revealed, that news will get out to everyone and may change the landscape and destiny of his planet forever. It might also bring the Sith or Galactic Empires down upon them.

So Jaune is still a bit goofy, but he's been using his abilities and covering them up with said goofiness. His precognition let him adjust himself so Pyrrha's spear pinned him to the tree rather than skewering him, and let him stumble and fumble around to dodge fire or help protect others.

So when Pyrrha is about to go fight Cinder... Well... Jaune's got no choice. He uses a burst of telekinesis to knock her into the locker instead, and runs off to confront Cinder.

He exits the elevator, she mocks him, and asks what does he think he is? A hero?

He calmly disassembles Crocea Mors, adopts a fighting stance, and ignites his lightsaber.

"No. A Jedi."

Which is as far as I got for that.
 
Cinder Makes an Oopsie
Funny idea but what if cinder fucked up royally before she even had a chance to start the fall of beacon?


*Nora is strapped to a chair with a copper wire collar covered in yellow gems on her neck and a cloth stuffed in her mouth*

Cinder: I hope you're comfortable, you're going to be here a while.

Nora: <angry confused mumble>

Cinder: I want some information on your teammate, originally we were going to have mercury fight her but since you were kind enough to go walking alone through vale I decided to take the opportunity.

Nora: <furious mumbles involving cinders ass and the chairs legs>

Cinder: so here's what's going to happen. You're going to answer every single question I ask you and if you're lucky I won't use that lightning dust collar around your neck to cook your brain. Understood?

*Cinder removed the gag*

Nora: AND THEN IM GINNA PULL IT OUTTA YOUR ASS AND STICK IT UP-

*Nora is gagged again*

Cinder: I guess you need a demonstration to get it.

*Cinder hits a little button and Nora lights up like a Christmas tree*

Cinder: enjoying yourself? I know I am.

*Nora rips through the restraints like they're made of warm butter and spits out the gag*

Nora: I've never felt better!

Cinder: what?

Nora: well except for all this ENDLESS RAGE but I have a fix for that!

*Nora breaks a leg off of the chair casually with enough force to turn the rest of the chair to sawdust*

Nora: now about what I was going to do to you with this chair leg.
 
I did have a thought (and I may yet do a short) for a Jaune who was a Jedi.

I've seen this done before but many such stories fail to keep Jaune in character.

For my take, his grandmother or grandfather (haven't decided) was a Jedi who crashlanded on Remnant and has kept a low profile. Maybe Remnant is near the Sith Empire during the Old Republic days, maybe this survivor fled Order 66: There are any number of situations it might work for.

Bottom line, Jaune's family is full of Force sensitives, but his potential was strongest and he was going into a career where training would most benefit him. However, his grandparent trained him a bit and made it clear he could NOT reveal himself unless there was no other choice to save lives. Because once Jaune is revealed, that news will get out to everyone and may change the landscape and destiny of his planet forever. It might also bring the Sith or Galactic Empires down upon them.

Hmm. So if Remnant is in the SW verse, it means that the Grimm and Salem's immortality are all wonky Force hijinks. So might be Dust. Hell, Remnant might be a proto-Zonama Sekot (aka a concious thinking planet with it's own force presence) and Dust is its lifeblood.

Penny as a robot with a soul/force presence wouldn't be unique, as there's full on droids that were force sensitive, and I dont mean the crystal jedi who used droid bodies.

It's kind of funny how "Force magic shenanigans" would explain pretty much all of Remnant's issues. Hell, even the faunus, as force users have created viable species before.
 
Hmm. So if Remnant is in the SW verse, it means that the Grimm and Salem's immortality are all wonky Force hijinks.

Plot twist. Salem is actually dead but her body is preserved by the force and her force ghost is trapped inside it.

She really wants to go into whatever afterlife there is but her options are pilot her corpse like a spooky Gundam or sit there in a unrotting body for eternity.
 

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