Emelie finds herself the owner of a house on Hau'oli Outskirts. She learns she will be exploring...
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User | Total |
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HowlingCrescent | 5 |
Aye boss, I don't want to come off as dickish or pretentious, but something fucky happened with chapter one.
Volume/tone control and message content compete for mental resources, and control loses, huh? Painfully familiar.This is what happened when you didn't pay attention to your voice!
Volume/tone control and message content compete for mental resources, and control loses, huh? Painfully familiar.
In all, I enjoyed reading this chapter, and I wish I was better at providing constructive feedback.
Emelie's anxiety is overwhelming to read. Which is a good things, as I can definitely empathise with feeling like that, even if I have never been in a similar situation where people already have preconceptions about me based on things I had no part in.
360° is a full circle, so she would end up facing Hau again, rather than looking behind her. I suspect that you meant one-eighty instead.
Emelie's anxiety is overwhelming to read. Which is a good things, as I can definitely empathise with feeling like that, even if I have never been in a similar situation where people already have preconceptions about me based on things I had no part in.
360° is a full circle, so she would end up facing Hau again, rather than looking behind her. I suspect that you meant one-eighty instead.
As for a more general comment on the events of the chapter: things went to hell in a handbasket, and I am now curious to see what the immediate fallout of this will be. Emelie herself is in no condition to assess the situation.
Also, did Necrozma try to fuse with her like it can with Solgaleo or Lunala? I know that it is too hungry to think, but I would not have expected it to target a human with that ability when running on instinct alone.
In any case, I enjoyed reading this.