Void Lotus (A Star trek x Halo forerunner SI)

[Leektheratking]

It is from myself I grant to thee little soul amidst the void of chaos and Q, the life anew as thou deserve, life in something greater, though dead as you are too. For it is not in my domain to give death of life, but to death give life.

I want to be strong, so that I can never be taken advantage of again.

Then it is yours from me to you a gift, be granted power and strength, though I too shall gift you wisdom, and the means to exist beyond one little speck, to use it in the way you see fit.

Rest now and be awakened.

--xxx-----xxx-----xxx-----xxx-----xxx--

"Officer Tu'Ke…just what exactly am I looking at?" Captain Selva couldn't help but utter out as the Nebula class ship, the Sol, named so for a star given for a long dead race that had been of interest once to the federation. floated nearby to a strange sight.

A large ship, which in truth would normally not be a source of alarm, though the sheer scale astounded them, for despite everything. Whether the Dyson sphere that had been discovered, rendered into the common log by the Tellerite captain Shos'tee, or likewise similarly logged phenomena of ancient and mysterious design, this was not some mobile planetoid, but recognisably a ship, or at least in part.

"it…seems to be a flower sir" Lieutenant Tu'ke said from her scanner array with a pausing certainty that had become the standard for her expression of confusion over time, as she looked forward through the front view, lowering her head slightly if at least to use her prominent brow ridges to shield from the glare of what the sensors picked up as stable plasma reactions at each flowers peak, shining blinding light down on the rest of superstructure.

Yet as they looked out, various scans being brought up, a voice spoke out.

"captain, I'm unsure of to the origin of this vessel, it doesn't match anything I'm looking for in the historical record, let alone common design choices, I mean. Look at those extending structures, the petals. I mean, they're, if my scans are coming in correct—that's another thing, its almost as if this thing is…if not shielded from scans then some kind of sensory reflective material…"the rushed speaking of the science officer, the proud three pips on his collar shining from the mans near incessant cleaning of them even now, his hand scrubbing lightly across his collar with his free hand has he held in the other a hand held pad in a gloved hand, extension of his own scanner desk.

"Science officer Kol'kotas, the pertinent information first please, before the extant discoveries, is it active? Life signs?" Captain Selva spoke slowly as she turned to the Aamaarazan holding the pad, the man under all the decorative clothing--that despite her dislike did fit with protocol and was allowed—was at least clear headed enough to sheepishly rub at the side of his face mask, his typical way of showing his nerves.

"well ma'am, from what we've been able to scan in the few hours we've been here, while there seems to be consistent power equivalent to that of what we can only assume to be a powered down or stationary state, we are unsure of life signs, I would in that regard like to request an away crew for further study." Kol'Kotas spoke far slower, as much as Selva seemed to note in his as of yet short tenure as science officer the man had been satisfactory in his duties.

"and you are sure it is both safe and possible to do so on such a vessel?" the captain questioned slowly, looking to the absolutely giddy Kol'Kotas.

"yes ma'am, from the scans, what little can pierce this film of obfuscation indicates that the vessel somehow bears a stable atmosphere, made of a mixture of eighty percent Nitrogen, twenty oxygen and various other trace elements, though microbial study is impossible from here" Kol'Kotas said quickly, the captain for all her Vulcan calmness rubbed the bridge of her nose, a nervous quiet filling the bridge of the Sol as she leaned forward.

"a single ship, security personal equal to one and a half of the science personal to descend" the captain said slowly, turning to her left to match eyes with her chief tactical officer the Kelpien man by the name of Bak stood quickly to position, voice carrying clearly across the room as the giant of an alien spoke.

"I will prepare mark threes and a collection of personnel; how many will you be taking Kol?" Chief tactical officer Bak said proudly, nodding in response to the scientist's answer of five and leaving rapidly to order the officers to arms.

--xxx-----xxx-----xxx-----xxx-----xxx-----xxx--

Yet between their talking and discussion of various officers aboard the starship Sol, they didn't seem to or perhaps were unable to notice a small floating object, only half a meter in size yet flying peacefully between the ebb and flow of solar radiation from beyond the edge of the artificial atmosphere of the Great ship.

"this is exploratory Ancillae 17-Jubilant Smile, requesting return. These infiltrators to the security of the Ark seem harmless, though audio and visual study scans have brought up an unknown seeming common language, translations attempts are already sent, they appear to seek landing on the Ark, shall I arm the dreadnought?" the floating multi eyed artificial intelligence asked into the void of space, sure its stealth systems were active as it waited, moments later did a response come, clear despite the distance, the short range communicator clear.

"this is acting command Ancillae 11-Glorious Sunrise, allow them purchase, I have already set up for 07-Mixed Matrix and 09-Utopia Pledge to altering the terrain of their assumed landing zone of the xenobiologicals to allow for minimal non invasive intrusion into the greater super structure, a fifty by fifty of the new measurement parameters granted by the master, zone that should give them what they want, as well as preparatory removal of five hundred Aggressor drones from mining of the local mineral system in the case of hostile takeover attempts" the voice that exited the communicator, was clearly picked up by its bearer, agreeing shortly as it began its short range teleportation jumps, merely a kilometre per second, second rate by all means of use and unflattering in its ability, even its limited radiation shielding only able to mask itself as the background radiation of a distant star instead of hiding it completely.

Such an embarrassing thing, though Jubilant Smile, least of which willing to use and show off its poor excuse for a teleporter was proud that it alongside the original twenty, was hand made by the master as such.
Which reminded the poor isolated Ancillae.

"should we awake the master?" a pip of agreement left the communicator in the form of an emoticon, the familiar three eyed form of its immediate superior holding up what appeared an imitation of the master's own hand striking its hand closed forward with its thumb protruding up to the sky.

"preparing awakening cycle for Maker-of-Planet-Song, I hope the master likes what I did with the carpets"

Ancillae 17-Jubilant Smile sure thought it had a strange boss as it teleported slowly but surely back, humming silently in the void a tune it was sure it heard amongst the clicks and brr's of the background radiation.

 

[Leektheratking]

Forerunner's...as I have found out, are walking, talking piles of sensory overload.





Whether its skin that feels too much, nerves clusters rendered in the thousands where humans bear hundreds in the same space.





They just seemed so strange.





--xxx-----xxx-----xxx-----xxx--




"Processing awakening sequence, this one is aware that your sleep cycle is incomplete master, but something of interest has occurred" the dulcimer ring of 11-Glorious Sunrise's voice came clear from the room. Once a storage room of sorts that the man had rendered into a bedroom, having numerous worker drones form the fabrics and numerous creature comforts within it.



Yet sitting up, as the chill of the sterile air touched my exposed skin, a shuddering of revolting recoil came through me, a sudden holy of "skin, now!" left Maker's mouth. Baring the sharp fangs at the edge of my lips slightly as the nanites rapidly built the second skin that quieted the noise of outside, silencing the scream of cold air and quickly degaussing static magnetic fields that tingled across his skin like a once warm lover's now cold hand.



"What has happened Sunrise? I thought it clear to not disturb me until I had fully slept" Maker questioned, taking a second to stand quickly to full height. He faced the floating ancilla with query.



"Yes master, though we believed that it would be most pertinent that you take attention to this subject, there is a form of lesser biological entity carrying ship, it from our cursory scans appears to be armed with some form of interesting energy manipulation weaponry, we have already modified the masters personal equipment to the energy signatures we can register. Though there too seems to be some atomic disintegrators amongst their gear." The ancilla said calmly as the forerunner began to walk, its long legs taking him over the distance from the sleeping quarters quickly towards one of the numerous control rooms.



"Do we have visual?" Maker asked simply, the response surprised him however as Glorious sunrise spoke.



"No sir, in response to their landing, we, that is. The other ancilla thought it best to remove any semblance of technology advanced beyond their own measure to ensure the secrecy of the installation from them; we have limited scans of their biological signatures from the atmospheric readings, however. Shall we deploy drones to eliminate them?" 11-Glorious sunrise said quickly, bringing up the readings they did have available. Yet Maker-of-Planet-Song shook his head.



"That will not be necessary" yet as Maker said that, yet as a headache began to form, Maker continued onwards.



"is there any record of the language spoken through the atmospheric readings, or any translations available?" Maker-of-Planet-Song spoke, yet even still the weariness of awakening bugged him, so on a simple order the lights dimmed.



"Render the light by colour scale Red/Green/Blue one-twenty-six, fifty-five, eighty-three, add the general flicker to match brain wave sequences for on the soothing scale. Perhaps the soothing colour will help cut the edge off the morning strain" Maker said slowly as in an instant the harsh white lights, even through the eyes of his second skin turned into a deep purple, the wine dark sea waves crashing upon the shores of his mind as he began to relax finally.



"No sir, though from a quick study of their language, it seems to be a common tongue made of tightly constrained glottal stops and intricate tongue weaving, not too dissimilar to a mix of Sanghelli and San'shyuum, we have thought to integrate them into common language forms for hominids such as these to create a rough simulacrum until such time a full translation is available" the ancilla spoke quickly, eager to appease the forerunner



"thank you sunrise, have these interlopers shown hostilities? Are they seeking something in the structure?" Makers questions were answered quickly in the negative by the monitor.



"hmm, strange then, prepare me a float-disk, grade three. I want them to have time to get settled before I introduce myself and what Ancilla are not currently active, I want to bring one alongside myself?" Maker spoke, a somewhat chipper tone emitting from the large forming triangular headpiece that wrapped his skull like a cushion.



Quickly, a list formed of floating hard light, flashing a list of five names.





02-Renegade Denial



[*]18-Humanitarian soul
[*]


[*]14-Soluable Antediluvian
[*]


[*]05-Wallowing Peony
[*]


[*]11-GLORIOUS SUNRISE
Patting the constructs top slowly, a mirthful chuckle came from the promethean as he read the list, flicking across the impossibly smooth surface rapidly as he spoke, looking up as the float-disk emerged and ready.



"prepare Humanitarian soul for departure, and grant the order to allow category one weapons only in the case of physical damage done on purpose, I will meet him on the way" Maker said carefully as he stepped onto the disk, it was a strange device that Maker had become familiar with as he grew accustomed to his new life, a smooth mercury disk roughly a meter and a half in its radius, the shimmering liquid surface, especially on a less intensive model such as this one, locked onto the feet and interfaced with the skin he wore seamlessly, integrating with its onboard ancilla and pulling from his thoughts and intentions for flight.



He had definitely not fallen on his ass fifty times the first time he tried it, nor had his numerous Ancilla offered various pieces of advice such as "why don't we get you a mark twelve combat skin, to make sure you're safe" and "you just need to fly like us, see its natural!"



Yet floating up, Maker turned away from the tri-eyed yellow beacon that was Glorious sunrise, only to meet the ever-joyful image of the Caradon class ancilla 18-Humanitarian Soul.



"HELLO MASTER! Are we here to deal with threats? Oh do say there are threats sir, I've been developing into those "preventative measure armaments" that you requested in the case of the rise of the flood again, but I…" the ancilla went off, each sentence carrying seamlessly into another, in truth when designing the AI, Maker had based it on half remembered thoughts of a friend from long ago and far away, a previous life that he had spent alongside an eternal compatriot, even to the end.



…



"thank you Humanitarian soul, I will need a armament in case, I will not be wearing a combat skin today, if only for propriety for this first meeting, prepare me a key please" Maker said as the float-disk beneath him rose, his feet firmly placed in the material as even for the low grade of vehicle did he rocket forth, dozens of kilometres an hour, the ancilla keeping up seamlessly as he saw the interesting energy pistol sword combo come to form from various pattern weavers inundating the atmosphere around the little blue friend.



Looking down to his wrist as he flew, Maker saw the deep soothing purple continue to bath him as he read the estimated arrival time to reach the interlopers intruding on his home, flying above various goats and cows and other animals kept in delicate balance, drawn from copies of earth stock within the library of the ark itself.



"just five minutes…come on Maker, first people you're going to talk to that you haven't made yourself in a while, you can do this!"



"did you say something master?"



"no, never mind little blue".



--xxx-----xxx-----xxx—













"away team…" the communicator malfunctioned once more, as seemed to be the normal on this strange ship, Bak noted with constrained anger as he stood back, overlooking the nine others in the away crew, the good scientist deciding he needed three assistants, yet. Even as Bak held the type three phaser rifle in his hands, him alongside the other security personnel, he felt the itch of the disrupter pistol on his hip, a necessary requirement for defence amongst the federation since the early days of formation with the Vulcan Klingon unity.



Yet more agitating than anything, Bak realised, was the incessant nagging of the Kol.



"don't you find this fascinating, I mean these trees are wholly unique to this environment, even the dirt has unique microbes, not least of which the macrofauna, I've been spending so long questioning what to name them, this place…its like someone took a wholly unique planet, something unlike anything else. Untouched by the greater galaxy" Bak heard Kol'kotas say with sincere adoration as he placed a hand onto the bark of a nearby tree, a small exoskeletal animal crawling onto the gloved hand, bearing eight legs and as the scanner denoted similar venom introducing glands to other animals on the planet, though still in its similarities to the galactic common animals, there was something unique about this small creature.



"Ol'tok shasma, striking fang" Kol'Kotas said to himself quietly as he placed the animal down, logging the name for the newly found species with ease.

"perhaps we can get some samples, or geologic readings, the mineral content is too dense for the scanners to dig through, but perhaps if you allow me your disruptor security chief then I can…"Kol'Kotas repeated the same question he had seemed to ask for the fifth time today, looking bashfully down as the response came, Bak for his own security touched a hand to the handle of the disrupter, if only to ensure it remained where it was.



"you know how the captain stand on the use of disrupters anyways sir, they're illogical to use when the phaser exists" a second voice came out, junior officer Falma, a Vulcan like the captain, the young woman humming to herself as she stood, staring at a small coprolite sample that was being scanned in the dirt, nodding at the readings before she stood, only to freeze.



Bak for all his training responded in the instant to see the flash of dread that crawled up his back, it is said that as a Kelpien, he can feel 'death' and surely that was what he felt in this moment.



"security! High and low, now" the security team responded in an instant, each surrounding the scientists in a circle as half looked to the sky, the other scanning the floor and eye line for any threat.



'Romulans? No this doesn't feel like them' Bak thought to himself as he remembered the feeling of fighting against the empire of empires, that dreadful band of the ancient Vulcan cousins and the children of Kah'less.



Seconds passed like hours as they stood, yet even as the scientists began to calm, the feeling did not leave Bak's soul, keeping a firm order as slowly he realise, the world began to bathe in red.



"sir, fourty up!" one of the security team called out, half of them swapping to stand to aim at the threat.



Bak, though from a planet considered primitive and only upheld to star traveling capabilities recently, was accustomed to the strangeness that new aliens can bring, certainly how short everything was had startled him at first.



Yet as he looked up, to see that dreadful black monolith standing upon the dais of silver, by its side some jittering blinding glow of blue that seemed to hum in tune with its own radiance, his eyes focused. Barely able to catch what seemed to be eyes, large green lens in the deepest dark of the thing, finally however, from that shapeless silhouette, an arm extended, and a voice spoke out. Not from the thing on the silver pedestal, but from the environment, the trees vibrated with its voice. The very air seemed to tremble with its wicked voice.



"Stand to attention, the glorious one has arrived"

 

[frooglestien]

*De-lurks* neat premise, didn't notice any serious errors, watched! [usual platitudes go here] *Re-lurks*

 

[theghoul05ita]

It's pretty good and i like the premise very much, but the sentence structure is a bit off in some places

For example

Captain Selva couldn't help but utter out as the Nebula class ship, the Sol, named so for a star given for a long dead race that had been of interest once to the federation. floated nearby to a strange sight.

Click to shrink...

I can't properly articulate why the first part feels wrong, but the space ship should be referred as "a" nebula class ship (it's not the only one), and it would flow better if you said the name first

Here the sentence explaining the origin of the name switches subjects while still talking about the same thing, "named" refers to the ship "Sol", but "given" seems to refer to the star "Sol", so the sentence ends up baing "the star was given "for" a long dead race", instead of the (i'm assuming) correct "the name (Sol) of the ship being given after the name of the star of a long dead race"

You should never have something outside of the double commas ("this, after the thing, became like that") refer to something inside them, they are treated like parentheses, so if you cut out the middle the phrase should still work("this became like that").
The phrase "the nebula ship named so" doesn't work becuse "so" refers to something that should have been isolated

Also the second phrase "been of interest once to the federation" has "once" in the wrong place, it should have been "once been of interest to the federation"
In the last bit "floated nearby to a strange sight." You don't usually use nearby to refer to "close to something" it's used to refer to something as "close to here" the correct form is "near" and the "to" is usually unnecessary (you use "near" to say "close to", if you still use "to" you might as well go back to "close" )

So the whole paragraph ends up being:

"Captain Selva couldn't help but utter out as the the Sol, a Nebula class ship named after the star of a long dead race that had once been of interest to the federation, floated near a strange sight."

Now obviously every rule i'm saying is not a law, and most writers break at least some of them, but they are at least aware of them, and know when to go into weird territory, and when to keep to grammatical rules

I'm not a native speaker, so sorry if some definitions are not exactly professional quality

 

[noobody77]

This is an interesting premise but the grammar and sentence structure make it very hard to read.

 

[Leektheratking]

It's pretty good and i like the premise very much, but the sentence structure is a bit off in some places

For example


I can't properly articulate why the first part feels wrong, but the space ship should be referred as "a" nebula class ship (it's not the only one), and it would flow better if you said the name first

Here the sentence explaining the origin of the name switches subjects while still talking about the same thing, "named" refers to the ship "Sol", but "given" seems to refer to the star "Sol", so the sentence ends up baing "the star was given "for" a long dead race", instead of the (i'm assuming) correct "the name (Sol) of the ship being given after the name of the star of a long dead race"

You should never have something outside of the double commas ("this, after the thing, became like that") refer to something inside them, they are treated like parentheses, so if you cut out the middle the phrase should still work("this became like that").
The phrase "the nebula ship named so" doesn't work becuse "so" refers to something that should have been isolated

Also the second phrase "been of interest once to the federation" has "once" in the wrong place, it should have been "once been of interest to the federation"
In the last bit "floated nearby to a strange sight." You don't usually use nearby to refer to "close to something" it's used to refer to something as "close to here" the correct form is "near" and the "to" is usually unnecessary (you use "near" to say "close to", if you still use "to" you might as well go back to "close" )

So the whole paragraph ends up being:

"Captain Selva couldn't help but utter out as the the Sol, a Nebula class ship named after the star of a long dead race that had once been of interest to the federation, floated near a strange sight."

Now obviously every rule i'm saying is not a law, and most writers break at least some of them, but they are at least aware of them, and know when to go into weird territory, and when to keep to grammatical rules

I'm not a native speaker, so sorry if some definitions are not exactly professional quality

Click to shrink...

Thank you for the advice, writing is always a learning opportunity for me, especially in the means of better understanding of language conventions

 

[CrazedGamma1721]

Ohh Now This Is Looking To Be A Very Interesting Story, Watched.