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The fact that Goetia is drawing his personality/mannerisms from Charlie and ends up being that easy to play is something Charlie should find insulting.
Well, it's not all that surprising.

It's not that hard to play somebody when they have the exact same buttons as you.
 
So, where is Fou? Did it just not follow them? Are they with Romani? This story is my only real exposure to FGO so if this was to be expected I wouldn't know.

Is this… hope? True, unequivocal hope?

It's been so damn long since I've felt it.
I guess Excalibur's Promised Victory aura is a poor man's substitute to actual Hope. What with Chaldea having enough of them to be paper weights.

"I am a being of pure Magecraft, a sapient Mystery.
Little details like this word choice tickle my fancy. Animals are sapient as well Goetia, the mark of person-hood is sentience!

While I doubt Charlie will actually manage to get the win through mind games because Goetia does have enough data and memory to independently(?) come to the conclusion that human Salvation is pointless (Exhibit A: the flaming wreck of history) the time/doubt from this stalling maneuver will give all those Servants plenty of opportunity for setting up oodles of Dues Ex Machina.
 
So, where is Fou? Did it just not follow them? Are they with Romani? This story is my only real exposure to FGO so if this was to be expected I wouldn't know.

I guess Excalibur's Promised Victory aura is a poor man's substitute to actual Hope. What with Chaldea having enough of them to be paper weights.

Little details like this word choice tickle my fancy. Animals are sapient as well Goetia, the mark of person-hood is sentience!

While I doubt Charlie will actually manage to get the win through mind games because Goetia does have enough data and memory to independently(?) come to the conclusion that human Salvation is pointless (Exhibit A: the flaming wreck of history) the time/doubt from this stalling maneuver will give all those Servants plenty of opportunity for setting up oodles of Dues Ex Machina.
Fou's there. Trust me, you'll see him soon enough.

As for Flynn's chances of success, answer me this: When do you think the last time Goetia practiced anything resembling introspection was? Or the last time he had to actually engage in debate? He lives up in space surrounded by a chorus of 72 yes-men with absolutely no real understanding of human nature. His "data" doesn't mean anything if it's poorly interpreted, and a sufficient command of rhetoric can make alternate interpretations of existing data possible, especially if the rhetor in question is already extremely familiar with his audience's biases.

In short, yes, Talking Things Out Like Adults is in fact a completely plausible means of resolving this conflict. Just because the Counter Force's go-to setting is "If gratuitous murder isn't solving your problems, that means you aren't using enough of it" one shouldn't assume that violence is the only way any problems can be solved ever.
 
It's the opposite actually. Anything alive has sentience. Anything that can experience things and think about those experience is sapient.
Indeed. The words respectively trace back to the Latin sentio, and sapio, which mean, respectively, "I feel," and "I think."
 
"You may call me… Goetia."

"Goetia? Really? You literally just named yourself 'magic?'" I ask, arching an eyebrow. And his previous sense of smug superiority seems to deflate, the second I poke at his ego. Theory confirmed. He is copying more than just my surface mannerisms.

"I am a being of pure Magecraft, a sapient Mystery. No other name would be more fitting," he says, a hint of defensiveness in his voice.

"And I'm a being made out of meat, water, and centuries of natural selection, but you don't here me calling myself 'Biology,'" I reply.
Btw, there is a very good reply here, Goetia missed.

There are 7 billion humans like Charlie in 2015 and many more trillions through out history. Goetia is, literally in all of time, one of a kind. That's why he can damn well call himself 'Magic'.
 
Well this chapter was a roller coaster of a chapter.

Hope Mash gets brought back.

The similarities between Charlie and John Constantine are getting more and more obvious.

Both of them are weak magically, but manage to beat much more powerful foes with their cunning.

Both are also utter wrecks of a human being due to the shit life has dealt them.

Hell this debate thing with Goetia reminds of a scene in the comics where John tries to negotiate with the First of the Fallen, the Vertigo version of Satan and a separate entity from Lucifer, for the soul of one of his friends and it turned out he poisoned the water the First was drinking.

Anyway great chapter.

Are you planning on writing more of this story, or at least a sequel, after the Goetia thing is resolved?
 
Well this chapter was a roller coaster of a chapter.

Hope Mash gets brought back.

The similarities between Charlie and John Constantine are getting more and more obvious.

Both of them are weak magically, but manage to beat much more powerful foes with their cunning.

Both are also utter wrecks of a human being due to the shit life has dealt them.

Hell this debate thing with Goetia reminds of a scene in the comics where John tries to negotiate with the First of the Fallen, the Vertigo version of Satan and a separate entity from Lucifer, for the soul of one of his friends and it turned out he poisoned the water the First was drinking.

Anyway great chapter.

Are you planning on writing more of this story, or at least a sequel, after the Goetia thing is resolved?
OH, there's definitely going to be a sequel. I'll announce the title after I've posted the final chapter of How I Saved History.
 
Chapter 155
"So, I think I should start this off by asking what you're trying to do with this." I tent my fingers as I look across the table towards Goetia.

"I want to save humanity and make everyone immortal," Goetia says.

I shake my head. "See, you're describing the means. I'm talking about the ends. What purpose does making everybody immortal serve?"

He's quiet for a moment. "Bettering the quality of human life, and preventing all the evils that have plagued human history."

"So, you're trying to ensure that people live happily." I pause. "So, then, what's happiness?"

"It's…" he's quiet for a few minutes, now, mulling it over. "A prolonged state of an elevated mood which humans find pleasant."

"Hm. So, what are the trigger conditions for this state, and why do you believe that granting humans immortality will improve happiness rates?"

"Well, obviously the reality of death is the root cause of all unhappiness!" he snaps, on the verge of storming off. Time to throw him the curveball.

"Are you happy?"

He freezes. "What?"

"Are you happy? Seeing as you're immortal, you could be a valuable data point as to discerning happiness rates amongst immortals as opposed to mortals, and how they feel about their immortality."

"Excuse me, is this some sort of symposium?" an unfamiliar voice asks, and I turn to see an ugly Greek man in a toga. His beard is scraggly and unkempt.

"I suppose so. We're talking over Mr. Goetia here's plan to remake humanity in his own image, and how to optimize it to meet his stated goals." I raise an eyebrow. "And you would be?"

"Servant Caster. True Name Socrates," he says, offering his hand for me to shake. "I was wondering if I might join you."

I grin. "The more the merrier."

In spite of Goetia's spluttered protests, Socrates takes his seat.

I try not to grin more broadly as I hear two more sets of footsteps making their way towards us.

---​

"Well, yes, but is there a difference between happiness derived from substance abuse, and happiness derived from the completion of stated goals?" Goetia asks.

"I still feel like we should set up the immortal rat farm in order to discern the parameters of happiness, and how to best implement the immortality," Tesla says, clicking a pen against his chin.

"Bah, mere controlled results," Aristotle sneers. "They pale in comparison to the unified application of observation and reason."

I sigh. "Look, Aristotle, the Scientific Method pioneered by Avicenna is a perfectly valid school of analytical thought, and no amount of complaining will change that."

"The FOUR HUMOURS WERE A PERFECTLY WELL-THOUGHT OUT MEDICAL THEORY, FLYNN!"

"THEY MOST CERTAINLY WERE NOT!" Nightingale snaps from her place.

"I observed four humors, and I don't care how many different bodily fluids that Avicenna hipster documented, I WAS THERE FIRST!"

"Okay, okay, let's break it up," I say, interposing myself between the two. "I think that we can all agree that one fistfight over medical theory is more than enough. Dr. Sanson, check the minutes, where were we?"

"We were attempting to determine how best to quantify and measure happiness, and we were debating how controlled tests should be managed." He flips through his notes. "I believe we were also waiting on the arrival of one Scathach, Queen of the Isle of Skye, to serve as a witness and data point."

A woman in black spandex storms in. "What do you limp-dicked natterers want now?"

"Oh. Hello, Lady Scathach," Goetia says in greeting. "We called you in so we could ask you on whether you feel that gaining immortality has improved your quality of life."

She stares at him incredulously. "No. Because I lived so long that everything became boring, nothing I did had any risk or excitement anymore, and then, when it looked like I was finally going to get some action, that jackass," she points at me. "went and poisoned Medb like a fucking coward, promptly sending me straight back to the Throne. And then, when it looked like I was going to fight in the final battle to save all of mankind, you cock-garglers turned it into a fucking tea party with the enemy."

Tamamo Cat freezes in the middle of serving Goetia crumpets.

"That's very rude of you." Goetia says after a few moments of silence.

She flips us all off as she stalks away.

"All right, I think that she's a solid tally in the 'decreased' column," I say after I'm sure she's out of earshot. "Sanson?"

"Marking it down."

"Good man. Now, what proposal were we on?"

"We were discussing your suggestion that Goetia make a colony of rats immortal so that you could give them cocaine."

"So that we could give them cocaine for science," I correct. "Now, who wants to put this to another vote?"

"I still distrust this 'Scientific Method' of yours," Plato interrupts, arms folded as he levels a mighty glare at me.

"For the love of- The Scientific Method is a perfectly valid method for examining the universe! Goetia, back me up here."

"I'm afraid I have to agree with Flynn on this one," Goetia says. He doesn't seem to be aware of how he's smiling, and if anyone else at the table notices, they don't catch it.

I make a mental note that Phase one is proceeding well. Camaraderie is an excellent tool for manipulation, if you know how to use it.

---

"All right, I think I have an alternative solution that will greatly serve to reduce the energy expenditures of the Incineration," I say during a lull in the debate.

"Let's hear it," Goetia says, taking a bite out of his sub. (I fast-talked Gilgamesh into catering when we broke for lunch.)

"Use dogs instead of humans."

Everyone at the table goes quiet, looking at me in confusion.

"And… that wouldn't save humanity," Goetia notes, tilting his head in confusion.

"Well, why are you specifically saving us humans?" I ask, and Socrates nods, seeing where I'm going with this. "What specific quality do we possess that dogs don't, which makes us worth saving?"

"Why are you even asking me this?" Goetia snaps.

"Because I'm not sure why you're saving us if you plan on taking away every defining quality we possess."

Socrates jumps in. "Indeed, what defines a human being?"

"Fou!"

I raise an eyebrow as I look down at the fluffy little guy who just crawled up onto the table. "Hey there. Are you looking for Mash? Look, I'm sorry, I don't know how to tell you, but-"

"Flynn, back away," Goetia commands, staring at the fluffy little critter that was Mash's closest friend. "We need to kill it."

"Hey, the little guy's completely harmless. He's been living in Chaldea for almost a year." I reach out to ruffle his ears. "Anyways, about what it means to be human-"

Huh. I can't feel my left arm anymore.

I look down at the bleeding stump, and then nod in understanding. Oh. So that's why.

Then I promptly pass out.

---​

"Flynn! Wake up!"

I feel someone shaking me, so I struggle my way into some semblance of wakefulness. The throbbing from my new stump is a steady beat across my body, something to anchor myself to.

Goetia is down at me, a hole through his chest.

"What happened?"

"The Cath Palug, the Fourth Beast, hijacked my Demon Pillars somehow. It's going to permanently destroy all of human history and then salt the earth so no life can ever return!"

I'm suddenly a great deal more awake.

"H-How?"

"It took advantage of me being distracted. We have less than a minute, and I'm out of ideas! DO SOMETHING!"

I blink, and look around. "Servants?"

"None left."

I blink. And then I do the only thing that I can.

"I've lost."

I feel the shadow that's dogged my steps since Jerusalem walk away, and I hear the tolling of the evening bells.

"What are you-"

"Help me up."

The blade falls. The Beast, unprepared for the sudden assault, dies, as the Reaper's sword cuts it off from Humanity. There is no Comparison beneath Azrael's wings, for all are equal in Death.

"What?" Goetia asks, staring at the shrouded figure of the First Hassan with naked confusion.

"Help me stand. I need to pay him what's owed."

The First Beast is of no help, so I rise on my own, pushing off a sizable piece of rubble.

It's hard to do one handed. Not like I'll have to put up with that for long, though.

I feel light, as I walk towards the specter of Death.

It's over. It's finally over. Another threat may rise, but that is for those who follow after me to deal with, something I can leave in better hands.

I smile, as I come face-to-face with the First.

"A life for a life," he says, his voice as cold and deep as the grave. "That was our bargain."

"May I ask that you return my remains to Chaldea?" I ask politely. "They may have need of them."

He inclines his head. "This I will do."

"Thank you."

I kneel before the Reaper.

And wait for the end.
 
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well played first hassan never stopped being the grand assassin so contingency for primate murder!fou ready...

mind you this seems a bit too easy and if flynn dies then humanity's f**ked once u-0l*a starts thier sh*t.
 
well played first hassan never stopped being the grand assassin so contingency for primate murder!fou ready...

mind you this seems a bit too easy and if flynn dies then humanity's f**ked once u-0l*a starts thier sh*t.
Not exactly. Flynn actually set up contingencies in the event of his death to ensure Chaldea would continue on at full strength.
 
"Bah, mere controlled results," Aristotle sneers. "They pale in comparison to the unified application of observation and reason."

I sigh. "Look, Aristotle, the Scientific Method pioneered by Avicenna is a perfectly valid school of analytical thought, and no amount of complaining will change that."

"The FOUR HUMOURS WERE A PERFECTLY WELL-THOUGHT OUT MEDICAL THEORY, FLYNN!"

"THEY MOST CERTAINLY WERE NOT!" Nightingale snaps from her place.

"I observed four humors, and I don't care how many different bodily fluids that Avicenna hipster documented, I WAS THERE FIRST!"

Oh shut the fuck up Aristotle. Your so called ideas and philosophies were crap!

A guy that lived in a barrel had more philosophical and intellectual credibility than you did, you damn sexist, slavery approving bastard!

A woman in black spandex storms in. "What do you limp-dicked natterers want now?"

She stares at him incredulously. "No. Because I lived so long that everything became boring, nothing I did had any risk or excitement anymore, and then, when it looked like I was finally going to get some action, that jackass," she points at me. "went and poisoned Medb like a fucking coward, promptly sending me straight back to the Throne. And then, when it looked like I was going to fight in the final battle to save all of mankind, you cock-garglers turned it into a fucking tea party with the enemy."

She flips us all off as she stalks away.

Truly she is supremely queenly in her actions and words.

"We were discussing your suggestion that Goetia make a colony of rats immortal so that you could give them cocaine."

This is the greatest sentence ever.
 
Oh yeah, the Mash interlude where Flynn basically asked Roman to necromancy some of the freeze-dried Masters, or barring that necromance his corpse.
Which is starting to look increasingly necessary, even if no one really wants to be the guy saying "Ok fam, let's zombie this shit up".
 
"Fascinating." 'Cursed Arm, knife him in the balls.'

"Our king has almost completed his next great project, Charlie. There's no escaping that. In no time- GAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" He doubles over in agony as Cursed Arm's dirk strikes true. "YOU MOTHERFUCKER! YOU STABBED ME IN THE DICK! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHH!"

"I'm simply doing as you suggested, Lev," I tell him sweetly. "If my death is inevitable, then I'll spend my last moments doing what will bring me the most pleasure: spitting in your king's eye."

He unfolds, no more time for talk, donning the form of a pillar of blackened, warped flesh encrusted with eyes. And then Georgios and Siegfried step up.

"ABYSSUS DRACONIS!"

"BAAAAAAALLLLLLMUNG!"

The freshly-transformed Demon Pillar topples over, carved in half by Siegfried's swing.

Of course, it doesn't stick.

"Oh, you poor fools, did you really think you could kill me?" Flauros laughs madly. "In this realm, the Ars Paulina, we Demon Pillars are reborn instantaneously whenever we fall! Your cause is utterly hopel- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!"

This honestly reminded me of this:



And now I'm imagining every single Servant kicking Lev in the dick, even if he is in monster form.
 
Huh, while Goetia has a hole through his torso and seems cut off from the demon pillars, I'm not sure if that really means anything as long as Roman is still around and the first Hassan doesn't finish the job. So assuming he does realize that he doesn't really have enough data to see if his plan is a good idea, that could be a really interesting shift in the status quo.

And a theoretical goodbye to Charles Flynn, kudos to making it to the finish line but.. I kind of hope he doesn't come back. I'm much more sad about Mash, whose death was just completely glossed over for an (admittedly pretty funny) philosophical debate with Goetia, especially if the whole "bringing her back to life" thing is no longer on the table (I'm assuming that if someone is personally claimed by Azrael, that's a bit harder to undo).
 
Alright - so Azazel kills beast IV, and take's Charlie's head in recompense. Goetia, however, is still alive and may now have developed enough to see that his plan was fundamentally flawed. Did the demon pillars die with Cath Palug, or will they return to Goetia? I don't know enough about the source material to speculate on what's going down here.
 
Gotta say contrary to everyone else's opinion, I didn't care one whit that Mash died, kinda because she wasn't in the story all that much and I aint into that "Protect the cinnamon roll!" stuff.

If Flynn does actually die here then it was a pretty great tragedy, also fuck Scathach, poisoning is a perfectly fine way of dealing with your enemies when Humanity itself is on the line.

I feel like Flynn is the only character who's been built up as such other than Wodine who would've asked and then told Goatia his plan is flawed so let's go other it.
 
She stares at him incredulously. "No. Because I lived so long that everything became boring, nothing I did had any risk or excitement anymore, and then, when it looked like I was finally going to get some action, that jackass," she points at me. "went and poisoned Medb like a fucking coward, promptly sending me straight back to the Throne. And then, when it looked like I was going to fight in the final battle to save all of mankind, you cock-garglers turned it into a fucking tea party with the enemy."
Hahaha, I think Scathach is the embodiment of everyone expecting this story to have shounen elements in it. :D

"The FOUR HUMOURS WERE A PERFECTLY WELL-THOUGHT OUT MEDICAL THEORY, FLYNN!"

"THEY MOST CERTAINLY WERE NOT!" Nightingale snaps from her place.

"I observed four humors, and I don't care how many different bodily fluids that Avicenna hipster documented, I WAS THERE FIRST!"
I...think Nightingale is misunderstanding something.

Tamamo Cat freezes in the middle of serving Goetia crumpets.

"That's very rude of you." Goetia says after a few moments of silence.

She flips us all off as she stalks away.
Okay Scath, that's taking it too far. No one should insult tea time.

"For the love of- The Scientific Method is a perfectly valid method for examining the universe! Goetia, back me up here."

"I'm afraid I have to agree with Flynn on this one," Goetia says. He doesn't seem to be aware of how he's smiling, and if anyone else at the table notices, they don't catch it.

I make a mental note that Phase one is proceeding well. Camaraderie is an excellent tool for manipulation, if you know how to use it.
That's...a way...of...doing things? :confused:

"Hey, the little guy's completely harmless. He's been living in Chaldea for almost a year." I reach out to ruffle his ears. "Anyways, about what it means to be human-"

Huh. I can't feel my left arm anymore.

I look down at the bleeding stump, and then nod in understanding. Oh. So that's why.

Then I promptly pass out.
Yeah, I don't think Fou is in the mood for your shit. I'm more surprised that he only took an arm.

"I've lost."

I feel the shadow that's dogged my steps since Jerusalem walk away, and I hear the tolling of the evening bells.

"What are you-"

"Help me up."

The blade falls. The Beast, unprepared for the sudden assault, dies, as the Reaper's sword cuts it off from Humanity. There is no Comparison beneath Azrael's wings, for all are equal in Death.

"What?" Goetia asks, staring at the shrouded figure of the First Hassan with naked confusion.

"Help me stand. I need to pay him what's owed."

The First Beast is of no help, so I rise on my own, pushing off a sizable piece of rubble.

It's hard to do one handed. Not like I'll have to put up with that for long, though.

I feel light, as I walk towards the specter of Death.

It's over. It's finally over. Another threat may rise, but that is for those who follow after me to deal with, something I can leave in better hands.

I smile, as I come face-to-face with the First.

"A life for a life," he says, his voice as cold and deep as the grave. "That was our bargain."

"May I ask that you return my remains to Chaldea?" I ask politely. "They may have need of them."

He inclines his head. "This I will do."

"Thank you."

I kneel before the Reaper.

And wait for the end.
That is one hell of a fucking trump card. o_O

By the way, did you just make Goetia into your ally? Does that mean he'll protect humanity after you?
 
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Yeah, I don't think Flynn would be of sound mind if he survived. Especially since his friends are already dead. At this point, death would be mercy in my opinion. And even if he survives, I hope Gramps doesn't use some BS loophole to let him go like with Cursed Arm Hassan in the game. At least, let there be a logical and iron-clad reason for it.
Now, I'm wondering about the lostbelts. If he dies, would his corpse be able to function the same way and deal with those? What of Goetia? Is he no longer a threat now? Will the pseudo singularities other than Shimosa even happen anymore? What will Romani do now? So many questions lol.
 

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