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On The Bench (AOT/DxD)

What actually is the Japanese phrase for this, and why do fanfic writers keep using this braindead fucktarded translation
Handsome is probably Bishonen, it's roughly mean "Beautiful Boy" or a "Beautiful Youth in a masculine way".
It could also be a translation of Riajuu ( I only say this since I don't really remember people saying damn Bishonen, but I remember people saying damn Riajuu) which is used by Otaku to reference popular peoples.
 
The New Path
It was a scene right out of a horror movie.

The body of the client Issei had been sent to, Koneko recognized, was crucified to the wall of his house. His limbs spread wide, and his face frozen in a silent scream of pain that told her he had not died quickly.

The smell was the worst. Blood, old and new, filled the air. And that was some of the more pleasant scents.

It made Koneko angry.

Minato had been kind. Most of his requests usually revolved around having Koneko help with moving things he couldn't due to his bad back with her enhanced strength.

And he baked some fantastic macaroons.

Koneko wanted to punch someone. Minato hadn't deserved this.

The culprit was the madly cackling man waving around a light sword and gun in priestly robes, making rude gestures from behind his compatriots' backs.

Whoever this fallen priest was, he was clearly a psychopath, and Koneko shuddered at the thought of what he might have done to Issei and the girl he was blocking if Kiba hadn't been there to call for backup and Issei didn't have a Rook's durability.

Four fallen, three women and a man, stood opposite the Gremory Peerage. Issei was behind his comrades' backs, a blond nun clutched protectively in his arms as he angrily glared at the black-haired woman.

Koneko was sure Buchou had said her name at some point, but she hadn't been paying attention.

Mooks didn't get names.

"We are not leaving without the nun," the black-haired woman said with a smirk, a lance of light in her hand.

"You can't take Asia!"

"Issei!" Rias cut off the Rook with a chastising look before returning her attention to their enemies. Kiba softened the blow slightly by patting him and the blonde nun on the shoulder. Asia just watched everything with wide eyes and tear marks on her cheeks. "I am well within my rights to kill all of you right now."

"You can try, bitch," the goth lolita reject laughed derisively.

Koneko was going to punch that one's teeth down her throat.

Rias didn't get angry, at least on the surface. Koneko knew her King was absolutely livid inside but was maintaining control for the moment.

"I have already alerted your superiors of your previous actions in my territory," Rias said, her voice a careful monotone, unlike her usual passionate speech pattern. Her face was also wholly blank. "The killing of a client and harming one of my Peerage on top of it are reason enough to do whatever I wish."

Koneko smirked slightly at the unnerved look in the Fallen's eyes.

The Rook liked Eren. She really did.

But there was no denying his way of speaking could be... off-putting. Not all the time, and it was getting rarer these days, but sometimes it was like he was completely empty.

Like all joy, hate, or emotion had been drained from him by the beatings of the world.

And when that expression was directed at you? It was like your entire existence was irrelevant.

As if you were nothing but a bug to be crushed underfoot.

It made for an excellent intimidation tactic, even if Rias would have to back it up a bit more.

These fallen seemed especially stupid.

"Big talk from a bunch of kids," the man in the trench coat sneered.

Koneko had been warned about people like him. She hoped he was wearing clothes under there. She already had to deal with one pervert on a day-to-day basis... Well, two.

Akeno was a different kind of pervert.

"I will give you this last chance," Rias declared impassively, crimson orbs of destruction centimetres thick filling the destroyed living room. They floated in the air like red raindrops, and the fallen stepped back at the sight. There were hundreds of them in the destroyed room. "Leave. Leave the nun. Leave this house. Leave my territory. Leave with your lives."

The black-haired woman looked like she was going to argue, a snarl forming on her lips, but the other Fallen with blue hair placed a hand on her shoulder and whispered in her ear.

"The ritual," was all she said.

Koneko's sensitive ears picked it up, and it was likely for that reason they kept their words to a minimum, out of caution that the Peerage had someone like her. Enhanced senses weren't rare in the supernatural world.

"Fine," Head-mook snorted, whirling around and grabbing the crazy priest roughly by his neck. "We'll leave. For now."

"Hey! Let me go! I wanna gut the fucking devils! And the bitch! I want her!"

The wacko priest continued to his stream of expletives as the fallen angels carried him by the neck as they fled through the hole they made in the house when they arrived.

There was a moment of tense silence as the devils didn't relax their guard.

"Gone." Koneko eventually spoke.

Rias untensed, whirling around and pulling Issei into a hug.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you, but don't scare me like that!" She chastised the Rook. Rias pulled the boy back, his face set in a derpy grin as she searched for injuries. "Are you hurt anywhere? Why didn't you run?" Eventually, she looked at her Knight when Issei continued to not respond. "Kiba, what's wrong with him?"

The blond Knight awkwardly scratched at his cheek, unsure how to reply.

Koneko didn't have that problem.

"Pervert is being a pervert."

"Oppai," Issei murmured as if in a trance, a goofy smile on his face from the hug.

Koneko felt her point had been made, so she yanked her fellow Rook away from their King. He stumbled but managed to regain himself to avoid falling to the bloody floor.

"As long as you are okay," Rias sighed with a smile before looking around. "We should leave. I'll have a few agents come through, clean up, and make an official story. Let's head back to the club."

"I'm not leaving Asia," Issei said, standing in front of the nun who had watched this interaction with confusion.

She hadn't understood the language but recognized the intent and care in the room, which was at odds with how she expected devils to act.

"Bring her along," Rias said easily. The redhead turned to the scared blonde for the first time and spoke in her native tongue. "We're not going to hurt you. Will you come with us?"

Asia looked at Issei, who nodded and stood up from her kneeling position. Blood was on her clothes, but she didn't seem to mind.

"Um," she stammered. "I don't want to sell my soul."

"We don't want your soul, don't worry," Rias reassured her. "We just want to ask some questions, that's all."

"Like why you are with the fallen," Kiba said with an easy smile. "You've been expelled, haven't you?"

"Yes," Asia said, looking dejected.

Koneko elbowed Kiba in the side for being so blunt, and the Knight grunted in pain.

"We should have killed them," Akeno argued as they left the building. Koneko could still smell the lingering scent of ozone from the Queen as they walked the streets. Teleporting with Asia wasn't possible, so they were walking as a group for safety's sake. "We had justification, and there is no way they will let this go."

"I don't want to fight in the middle of the suburbs," Rias argued back. "And not without knowing Issei's state. I am not worried about them. 'For now.' Pss. That is a mook line if I've ever heard one."

Koneko nodded sagely, glad her King was as good at identifying scrubs as she was.

"You saw how they looked at her," Akeno cautioned. "They will not leave Asia alone, no matter the warning."

"I know," Rias sighed as she slowed slightly to walk closer to Asia and Issei. The blonde flinched, but Issei tried to reassure her it was all right. "But an area filled with sleeping civilians is not the place for a showdown."

Issei gained a point in Koneko's book for how chivalrous he was being in this whole thing. Seeing how protective he was of the nun was quite cute.

That still put him at a negative nine hundred and ninety-nine points.

Out of a hundred.

"Why are they so set on you?" Rias asked the nun bluntly. "Most healing spells of the church don't work on the Fallen. What's your Sacred Gear?"

Koneko wondered if spending so much time with Eren was a good thing or not. Her King was clearly taking after him with how blunt she was being.

"Twilight Healing," the nun said softly after Issei gave her an encouraging nod.

"I see," Rias sighed as she and Akeno wilted slightly. Asia looked like she would cry, so the King hurried to answer. "Nonono, it's a good gear. Great, in fact. It's one of the best healing Gears out there. There are only a few active users, and all factions are looking to recruit people with it; it's just..."

"You can only heal injuries, right? Not diseases or sickness?" Akeno interjected, getting a hesitant nod from the nun. "One of our friends is sick. We had hoped you had a gear that could help him."

"Sorry," Asia apologized with a bow.

Now Koneko felt like they had kicked a kitten.

The others also clearly felt that way, as even Akeno looked guilty.

"I think your Gear is awesome," Issei interjected with a broad smile, trying to cheer her up. He exaggeratedly rotated his shoulder. "I don't feel any more pain after being shot."

"You were shot!" Rias whirled on her newest Rook, looking him over more intensely than before. She noticed one of the holes in his uniform, over his left shoulder, was circular and covered in blood.

To be fair, much of Issei was covered in blood from rolling around and scuffling with the fake priest before the rest of the Gremory Peerage had arrived. That hole was one of many in his clothes, and there was no wound, so Rias hadn't missed anything.

"Twilight Healing also works on devils?" Kiba asked himself, but Koneko heard him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Rias fretted over Issei, poking at his body for any other unmentioned wounds. "Light energy is poison to us. Did he get you anywhere else?"

"I'm all good now," Issei defended himself with his arms raised, not looking like he minded the attention at all. A pervert's gotta pervert, after all. "Asia's got me."

Rias narrowed her eyes at the boy as if daring him to lie to her but eventually accepted his words as the truth.

"Thank you for healing him," Rias said as she bowed to the nun. "Issei's new, a bit clumsy, and a pervert." "HEY!" "But he is my cute servant, nonetheless. So thank you for taking care of him."

"Uh..." Asia stuttered, eyes wide with panicked surprise. "NO! I, uh, I mean. Issei has been very kind to me, even if he is a devil. It was just... the right thing to do." She said the last part with a flush on her face as she looked away, twiddling her thumbs in embarrassment.

"Still, thank you," Rias smiled cheerfully.

Akeno nodded in thanks as well. Kiba smiled kindly at the blonde, and even Koneko gave the girl a thumbs up.

The pervert was still a pervert, but she didn't want him to die for it.

Just get kicked in the nads a few times.

Asia looked utterly overwhelmed by this positive reinforcement, as if her worldview was being rewritten.

"See," Issei urged. "You Gear is super useful. Much better than mine."

"I think Issei's glove is cool," Asia disagreed.

"All it does is let me punch things without hurting my hand," Issei rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. "And since I'm a Rook, I'm already tough enough, so it's useless."

"There, there," Rias patted his head consolingly. "You just haven't awakened it yet. Once you do, I think you will be happy with your... glove." The redhead and her Queen snickered as if they were in on a joke that the others weren't.

"Meaning?" Koneko asked with a frown, not liking being left out like this.

"I'll tell you later," Akeno smiled mischievously.

Koneko nodded. That was fine. So long as she wasn't the last to know.

"Hey! It's my Sacred Gear! Tell me," Issei protested.

"I don't want to get your hopes up, so you will have to awaken it yourself to find out," Rias denied. "I'll just tell you that Sacred Gears are known to respond to emotions. Try focusing on what you really want."

Issei took her advice to heart, closing his eyes and muttering to himself as he walked.

"Harem King. Harem King. Harem King. Harem King. Harem King. Harem King. Harem King."

Koneko sped up a bit, so she was in front of the boy and held out one of her feet.

Issei tripped, smashing his face on the pavement and getting chuckles from the rest of the Peerage.

"Issei!" Asia, on the other hand, rushed to aid the boy in rising to his feet. Her hand glowed green, and she pressed it against his face.

"Don't bother," Koneko said with an imperceptible smirk. "He's a Rook. He's not hurt."

True enough, apart from some dirt, Issei stood unharmed after his fall.

"That was mean, Koneko-chan!"

"Git good scrub."

That got a few more chuckles from the group as Asia looked on in confusion. Rias must have taken pity on the poor girl because she decided to shift the topic.

"Do you know what you want to do," the redhead asked the nun. At her bewildered expression, Rias explained. "You are technically my prisoner of war, but I don't have any plans for you. You can stay at our clubhouse in one of the spare bedrooms tonight, but eventually, you will have to decide what comes next. The fallen did not seem to want to let you go. Once they leave my territory, I'll let you go if you want to follow them. Or you can stay here."

"If I want to stay," Asia asked softly, looking at the ground. "Do I... Do I have to become a devil?"

"It would make things easier," Rias admitted. "I think you would enjoy being in my Peerage, and I want you to join us. Your Gear is very useful, and I think we'll get along. But no, it is not a requirement."

"What do you want, Asia," Issei asked with far more gentleness than Koneko thought possible from him.

"I want... I want to go to school," Asia said softly as if admitting to a sin. Then her words started to pick up speed, sounding more determined than ever. "I want to have friends. I don't want people to be mean anymore. I don't want to hurt people. I don't want to return to the church with Freed, Mittelt, Kalawarna, Dohnaseek, and Raynare."

The Peerage shared small smiles at the small, simple, selfish wish.

They were devils, after all.

Granting selfish wishes was their job.

"I can arrange that," Rias smiled kindly.

"Thank you," Asia bowed, tears in her eyes as Issei cheered.

"But nothing comes for free in the world," Rias cautioned. They had arrived before school by then, making good time as the client's house was pretty close by. "There is a price for everything. I can make you a student, find you a home, help you make friends, and protect you from the fallen. But you will need to do something for me."

"Hey, that's not fair," Issei complained.

"What do I need to do?" Asia asked, eyes still wet with tears but looking far more determined than before.

"All I want you to do is to try to heal my friend. The one we told you about earlier."

"But," Asia looked sad and regretful. "I really can't heal diseases. I've tried before, but I can't."

"Maybe not," Rias acknowledged. "I just want you to try your best. Maybe you can't heal him completely, but you might be able to reverse some of the symptoms. Give us more time to find a permanent cure. Can you promise to do that?"

"I can!" Asia declared passionately. "I'll do my best. I promise."

"Wonderful Asia," Rias said gently. "I'll introduce you to him tomorrow. Until then, get some rest. Akeno, can you show her to one of the available rooms?"

"Of course," the Queen agreed. "This way. I have some old clothes that might fit you."

Asia looked at Issei briefly, but he just nodded for her to follow Akeno.

"Do you need me to teleport you home," Kiba asked Issei. "It's pretty late, and your parents will wonder why you're covered in blood. I can get you in unseen."

"Thanks, man," Issei sighed in relief. "Asia healed me, but I am wiped, and I soooo wasn't looking forward to that conversation."

"Get some rest as well," Rias frowned at the boy in concern. "If you find any other issues, let me know immediately. Rogue priests are no joking matter for new devils."

"Will do Buchou," Issei said with a salute as he and Yuuto teleported away.

Koneko was also going to head to her place but paused when she saw Rias's face as her King sat behind her desk to finish the paperwork she had been working on before getting the emergency call.

"Buchou?" Koneko asked.

"Oh, Koneko," Rias said, emerging from her thoughts. "Sorry, I thought you had left. Be safe on your way home, okay? I don't think the fallen will pull anything tonight, but be careful just in case."

The smallest of frowns crossed the nekoshou's face as she looked at her King.

"You alright?" She asked the older girl.

"Hm? I'm fine," Rias said. She didn't look fine to Koneko. "Just a letter from my parents, that's all. Issei's recruitment has some... implications I needed to inform them about. I'll give you the details tomorrow. For now, get some rest."

Despite her King's assurances, Koneko maintained a frown as she wished Rias a good night.

Her last sight of the heiress, before she left, was of Rias holding a letter in her hand. Instead of reading it, she repeatedly tapped it on her arm, lost in thought.

Rias stared out her window into the dark park and the bench that lay within.

********

A big thanks as always to my beta, Old Man of the Mountain.

It was always hinted that Rias knew Issei had Boosted Gear before anyone else, likely because of how much it cost to reincarnate him and seeing its 'base form.' And, seeing how much of a BIG DEAL it is in canon, I find it perfectly reasonable that she alerted her parents and brother about her suspicions. It would also explain how quickly the news spread.

For those curious, yes, Twilight Healing cannot heal diseases in canon. That is explicitly stated. (I don't know if Asia's balance breaker is the same since it's never mentioned.)

I won't be showing a lot of the 'canon' events, just enough to give my readers a glimpse into what changed. For example, in this world, Rias not only had the political grounding to stand off against the fallen when they attacked because she already started the process, but she was also strong enough to scare them away. Issei is also in better shape because he is a Rook, not a Pawn, so she isn't as worried.

Anyway, this will probably be one of the only times I explicitly call out what changes in my AN. Everything else will be up to you all to read and puzzle out. I just want to be clear that things will be different. More and more so as the story progresses. Simple changes now will have tremendous effects later.

The next handful of chapters are some of my favourite written so far, so I look forward to that.

I will meet you all next time on the bench.
 
Thank you for the great chapter, I really like how your wrote the difference between canon and this with the standoff. I look forward to what you come up with next, keep up the good work!
 
Wounds
Akeno watched the rest of the Peerage leave the little clearing with a frown as she set about cleaning up.

Rias was consoling her new Bishop quietly as they left. Asia was particularly distraught over her failure to heal Eren despite only meeting him today.

Akeno was sad but unsurprised that even Twilight Healing, one of the best healing Gears out there, couldn't help. There had been hope, but not a lot of it.

Seeing Eren trying to interact with the naive and kind Asia had been funny, though.

The Queen got the feeling that Eren was not used to dealing with people who were genuinely that kind, as opposed to faking it as Akeno, and to a lesser extent, Yuuto did.

"What's wrong with her," Eren asked bluntly as Akeno gathered the plates and silverware they had used for their lunch. It had only been a few hours, during which they had Asia subtly try and heal the blind boy.

"Asia is a dear," Akeno lightly chastised with a chuckle. "She really was trying to help."

"I know none of you believe in that 'miracle healing' shit. I am not just going to be healed suddenly because of a religious prayer. That's not how reality works."

Well, as 'subtle' as they could be.

The official excuse was that Asia, a new student at the school and club member, had been a nun and 'faith healer' before moving here. Rias claimed it was 'worth a shot,' and despite his doubts, Eren had gone along after they all urged him to. Nothing they said was technically a lie, so even Eren, with his almost supernatural bullshit radar, hadn't caught on.

Nothing had happened.

Koneko reported no change to his life force as it continued to dwindle. Nor had his eyes healed, his strength returned, or any indication of the healing having taken place.

Akeno was seriously starting to suspect Eren wasn't simply sick but under some divine-level curse.

Only the complete absence of any magic or power around him prevented that notion. They had been around him long enough that they would have noticed even the faintest trace if it was there.

If it had worked, or at least healed the side effects, like his eyes, it would have been a perfect time to introduce him to the world of devils, magic, and so on.

Rias had a whole speech planned and everything despite considering it to be a long shot. Akeno had seen her practicing it in front of a mirror.

It mostly boiled down to, 'I am a super powerful devil heiress trying to heal you. Please don't die. And if you do die, please let me bring you back. Yadda yadda, power of friendship, yadda yadda, anime protagonist, yadda yadda, JoJo.'

It had been quite cute, even if Rias had referenced the manga, she read to Eren a bit too much, in Akeno's opinion.

Shame she didn't get to use it.

"Is it so hard to believe she simply wanted to help you?" Akeno reprimanded him again as she continued her work. "Asia is a very kind girl. She sincerely believed she should have been able to help you."

"I believe she believes," Eren answered. "But belief does not save people. Belief does not fill hungry stomachs. Belief will not kill your enemies. People do. I have seen people of faith before, and I can't stand them. 'Flock' is but another word for livestock."

Akeno didn't bother to hide a smile, knowing the blind boy couldn't see it.

Eren was sometimes more devil-like than any of them.

"If medicine doesn't work, other options should be considered. Who knows what's out there? A miracle could happen."

"I know what's out there," Eren answered plainly. "And no miracle will stop my death."

Akeno's smile faded back to a frown. Eren didn't know about magic or the supernatural, so he would understandably hold that view. But the Queen was tired of his cavalier attitude towards his impending demise.

The conversation lapsed as Akeno fished up, storing the blanket. She put the leftovers in containers for Eren to take home later.

"What's bothering you?"

"What do you mean?" Akeno asked a sudden question.

"You're quiet. You've been quiet the last few days, and so has Rias. You didn't even tease Asia and Issei today."

Akeno snorted a small, unladylike laugh.

Eren was blind and only met the nun for a few hours today, but even he could tell the girl's crush on the perverted boy.

Then again, Asia could do a lot worse.

Despite his perversion, Issei was the Red Dragon Emperor of the generation. Even if he was the weakest holder of Ddraig ever, that would still put him firmly in the Ultimate Class once he grew a bit.

On top of that, the boy was unbelievably sweet to the girl.

As in, his friends and the school would literally not believe their eyes if they saw it.

Not only had Issei largely kept Asia out of his perverted antics, but he had stood up for her and defended her against the fallen when they came to reclaim her.

Asia had tried to sacrifice herself to get them to leave him alone, but Issei had managed to awaken his Gear in time to fend them off, combined with his Rook strength and durability. He had held them off long enough for Rias and Akeno to arrive and help finish them.

Their aid and desire to stay with Issei had been enough for Asia to approach Rias about her open offer to join the Peerage.

It was an adorable story, like one of Rias' anime.

A not-so-small part of the Queen also liked the idea of the fallen being some two-bit mook in the story. Characters killed off in the first season to establish a romantic interest.

Akeno would be genuinely happy for the pair if they ended up together.

At least some people deserve to find love.

"Are you going to answer my question or sit there and sigh all day," Eren asked, tapping his cane on the ground impatiently.

"It's not my secret to tell," Akeno eventually said.

"Rias' then," Eren nodded. Akeno smiled wryly as she once more reaffirmed how sharp the boy could be. "Something to do with her family? She's been complaining about them a lot more than usual."

"It does," Akeno acknowledged but didn't provide any details.

If Rias didn't share, she wouldn't either.

"And since she hasn't told me, she doesn't think I can help with whatever it is," Eren sighed.

"It is something none of us can help with," Akeno said lightly.

No. That wasn't true.

They all could help. They could and would fight Riser in a Rating Game.

That was where this was leading, after all. It was a transparent ploy Akeno, and her King could see coming a mile away.

Rias' family was pushing the engagement forward, despite their promises to wait till she graduated, because they feared her new Peerage members.

The Red Dragon and its hosts had killed numerous members of the Phenex clan in the past, and giving Issei time to grow was a surefire way to ensure Rias was strong enough to get out of the deal by the time the original deadline arrived.

They had been content to let Rias finish her schooling, confident that the rebelliousness of youth would wear out as she grew and came to accept their decision. There had been no binding agreement for that promise, so nothing stopped them from deciding to change the date on a whim except their genuine care for their daughter and desire to have her see things their way.

The Boosted Gear changed everything.

A King with a fully realized Red Dragon Emperor in their peerage could dictate whatever they wanted in devil politics.

Someone disagrees with them, like, say about their marriage? Challenge them to a Rating Game.

That was how central the games had become to devil life.

It would be like a Satan suddenly being allowed to participate in Rating Games. Entire political careers had been built on the Rating Games.

Once Issei had a few years of experience under his belt, the Gremory would have no control over Rias. She could go centuries without marriage if she wanted, and nothing they could do would stop her. She'd just challenge her own parents to a game. It wouldn't be the first time factionalism formed within a Pillar house.

And that would ruin the Gremory.

For devils, with their abysmal birthrates, starting young wasn't just recommended. It was almost a requirement.

Just looking at Rias' parents proved it. Despite being a very loving couple over a thousand years old, they only had two children born centuries apart.

It was one of the reasons arranged marriages were so common, to ensure devils had at least one child before they inevitably did something that got them killed. When you are one of three parties in the greatest war ever fought, you need to keep up the numbers.

Especially if you are a devil with a bloodline.

For Rias, who had the Power of Destruction, one of the most coveted bloodlines in the underworld, the idea that she wouldn't have a child for centuries or millennia was terrifying for the remaining Pillar families. Already, they were being outnumbered by reincarnated devils ten thousand to one.

Rias's parents cared for her and loved her. They really did. They were kind to her, spoiled her, and took her Peerage in as family.

But they also had a duty to see that the remaining 31 Pillar houses did not shrink further. They still loved each other and had been in an arranged marriage when they were young. They did not understand her reluctance, but they were out of time to try and convince her.

So they pushed and pushed and pushed.

And now, pushing was no longer enough.

Instead of nagging, they were being more overt. Forget letting Rias graduate college. They wouldn't even let her graduate high school.

That was how terrifying a Boosted Gear holder was.

There was only one thing Rias could do now. The one recourse all High-class devils had.

A Rating Game.

Everyone knew it. The question was how long Rias could delay it. To give the Peerage more time. There were other more desperate ploys, but that was the only one that was sure to stop the marriage and not lead her into disgrace.

Right now, the entire Peerage was strong. Rias' added practice in order to grow strong enough to reincarnate Eren had spurred on the growth of the rest.

Akeno had no doubt that even without Issei or Asia, the four of them would absolutely decimate Riser's little 'harem.'

But Riser himself?

And his sister?

None of them were strong enough to ensure they'd be able to beat him enough to force him to retire. Especially not if they had to deal with his Peerage as well. Even if Rias could beat him a dozen times, it didn't matter if he healed two dozen times.

The extra power and training gave them a chance, but it was increadibly small.

If only...

"You're lying."

"Hm?" Akeno asked, having fallen into deep thought once more.

"You're lying," Eren repeated, fully frowning. "I know your bullshit when I hear it. There's something we, or at least you, can help her with, isn't there?"

"Yes," Akeno admitted with a cavalier shrug of her own. What was the harm in admitting that? Eren already knew she was a rotten, terrible woman. "There is something I could do to help my best friend. But I won't."

Safe in the knowledge that Eren couldn't see them, Akeno let her wings free.

One of them was bat-like, leathery and angular. The wings of a Devil.

The other was larger. Black as night, with soft feathers that glittered in the sun like polished obsidian.

The wings of a fallen angel.

As with every time she saw that... thing, accursed proof of what she was, Akeno could not stop her hands.

Blood flowed across her fingers as she tore fistfuls of feathers from her flesh.

The pain was an old friend.

"Why not?" Eren asked in that empty voice of his. There was no judgement in his voice but no curiosity either. Akeno didn't know what he was feeling.

All she was feeling was the familiar sting of self-disgust.

"Because I am a terrible person," Akeno said airily like she was talking about the weather, as she tore another handful of soft feathers from her wing. She was not gentle. They floated to the ground, slick with blood. "I would rather let my best friend, my sister in all but blood, be consigned to a terrible fate because I cannot stand the idea of using anything from that man. Because I am the worst woman to ever live."

"No. You are not."

"I am," Akeno laughed hollowly—another fistful. The wing was gaining bald spots now. From experience, Akeno knew she wouldn't stop until it was completely bare flesh with no feather in sight. Until there was no proof of what she was. "I am a terrible woman. The worst, vilest creature to exist. I am my father's daughter."

"The parents' crimes should never be passed onto their children," Eren sighed, unseeing the self-mutilation happening on the bench beside him. "I cannot claim to not hate people due to their ancestors or where they were born, but children are guiltless. Simply casualties in the wars and sins of grown-ups. Whatever your father did is not your fault, no matter what people have told you."

"I hate him," Akeno bit out, glaring at the boy. "I hate him. He wasn't there. My mom died because he wasn't there to protect her."

"I don't know the circumstance, so I can't say if it was or wasn't his fault," Eren shrugged.

Sometimes, Akeno absolutely despised how blase he could be. As if every story he was told was one he had heard before.

"He should have been there!" Akeno insisted, voice rising despite Eren's serenity.

"All I will say is that a husband not knowing his wife is in danger doesn't make her death his fault. Even if he could have stopped it if he were there. He didn't kill her."

There was something there.

Under the cavalier attitude and blank voice, there was something Eren was hiding. It was only because she knew him so well that Akeno could notice.

It was what prompted the next words.

"He didn't," Akeno laughed bitterly, tears of anger, loathing, and resentment filled her eyes. "I did."

Eren froze.

"What?"

"I killed her," Akeno repeated, the words falling out of her. Years of built-up guilt and disgust burst out of her. "They came for her because of me. Because she married my father and had me. They killed her because she wouldn't give me up."

At her core, Akeno was a rotten woman who hated herself more than she hated the fallen or Baraqiel.

It was her fault her mother was murdered.

Her existence had pushed the clans to send their assassins after the family while her father was away. If her parents had simply been wed and never had a child, Shuri Himejima would still have been an outcast, but she would have lived. The taint on their legacy, the mixing of 'sacred' blood with that of the fallen, had caused her death.

And now?

Now, Akeno could help Rias if she was willing to use her unique heritage.

Holy Lightning.

Baraqiel's signature ability.

It would counter Phenex's regeneration and practically guarantee their victory and Rias' freedom, turning a ten percent chance at victory into a ninety percent.

Yet every time Akeno tried to pull up that part of herself, tried to will even the tiniest of sacred energy into her electricity, all she could think of was her mother's murder, of her dying face, and the guilt would sap everything from her.

Akeno could still hear the blades entering flesh, the scream of pain, the urging of her dying mother.

Begging her to run.

To live.

In her nightmares, she was still on the streets of Japan. Barely surviving as her mother's last words rang out over and over and over in her mind.

Those were the better ones.

Others were just a repeat of the event. No changes. No embellishments.

Shuri Himejima never blamed Akeno, not even in her dreams.

The worst of the dreams was when Akeno saw what could have been. The 'what if' of her parent's lives if she had never been born.

They were happy. A loving couple living out a quiet life of seclusion.

A happy life without her.

Akeno would never use Holy Lightning. She could never use it.

Rias never forced her to or even asked her to, even after all this time. Even if it would solve her problem.

Akeno loved Rias as much as she hated herself.

Hated how her continued existence ruined the lives of those around her.

Truly, "Akeno Himejima should never have been born."

...

The punch came out of nowhere, so lost was the hybrid in her self-hatred and guilt.

Akeno flew off the bench, tumbling to the ground below, wings splayed in the dirt.

"Don't say that!" Eren shouted at her. "Don't you dare say that!"

He was standing, Akeno thought in a daze of shock.

He was off the bench.

For some reason, that fact shocked her more than the punch.

"Don't you ever say that again!"

Eren's face, the part not covered in bandages, was twisted in a snarl of fury. The greatest show of emotion Akeno had ever seen on his face.

"Just when I think you can't piss me off anymore, you go and spew this crap," Eren snarled.

His cane tapped hard on her leg to find her, and he bent down, grabbing the stunned girl by her shirt. The cane fell to the ground as he used both hands to hold her in place, a few inches from his face.

"Listen here, you pathetic woman," he growled, practically spitting on her in his intensity. "I don't care about any guilt you feel, how much you hate yourself, or whatever pathetic excuse you have for those words. That crap only matters to you. We're all guilty. But never, and I mean never, say you shouldn't have been born!!"

Eren punched her in the face again.

Akeno could have dodged it.

She didn't.

Akeno fell again as Eren continued to yell.

"No matter who you are, what you are, what you do, who you kill or don't. None of that crap matters. It didn't matter to your mom. It might not matter to your dad. It doesn't matter to Rias. I certainly don't give a shit. But no matter what, there is one thing that does."

Ah.

That face. That rage. Had that always been there?

Hiding under a man beaten by the world?

Had Eren always been... this?

"We all deserve to be born," Eren snarled, smashing a fist to his heart in emphasis. "We all deserve to be free to live. That is the only thing owed to everyone in this shitty world. We all deserve that just for being born into this world. Our sole birthright. Even you, the rotten woman that you are."

The shouting, the rage, seemed to leave him then as Eren sagged, almost collapsing back to the bench.

For a long second, Akeno lay on the ground, utterly shocked.

Her hand rose to her cheek where she had been punched. Twice.

It didn't hurt.

Eren was human and sickly on top of that. As well as being born half-fallen, Akeno was a Queen of a devil Peerage. Queen's didn't get the total bonus to toughness as Rooks, but they got a part.

It had been momentum more than force or pain that had caused her falls.

"I don't know if your mom died because of you or not," Eren admitted, panting for breath after the exertion. "You didn't kill her. Others did. So get that stupid idea out of your head. If you can't or don't want to use whatever has to do with your father to help Rias, fine. If she needs you to, she'll ask herself. But if I ever hear that Akeno Himejima shouldn't have been born, I will punch you again. And I don't think I'll stop."

He was serious, Akeno realized. He really would try to beat her up if she said that again.

Akeno couldn't help it.

She laughed.

She laughed and laughed and laughed and cried.

Akeno cried in the dirt, wings splayed wide for the world to see as tears streamed down her face.

No hug. Not a single kind word.

This wasn't some romantic gesture of acceptance. This wasn't Eren acknowledging Akeno for being Akeno, comforting her with the knowledge that he saw her as her instead of her race or heritage.

Eren didn't know about fallen angels, about Baraqiel and the sacred clans of Japan. He had no idea that Akeno could fry him before he could even throw a punch.

And Akeno was sure that even if he did, he'd still punch her.

It was so... Eren that she couldn't help but laugh.

"Ufufufufu," Akeno chortled, getting to her feet and wiping herself down. She also put her wings away, glad the older boy hadn't noticed. She wiped her tears as she took a seat on the bench. "What a brute. To hurt a delicate lady such as myself." Eren snorted. "Still, if I remember correctly, I did promise you a reward if you could punch me. What do you say? Want to help me explore my M side?"

Eren sighed, but Akeno was happy to notice it was a familiar one of fond exasperation instead of anger or disgust.

"I wasn't lying, you know," Akeno admitted softly as she pulled a twig from her hair. "It really was because of me that my mother was killed. That isn't hyperbole but fact. I couldn't have stopped it, but she would still be alive today if I had never been born."

"That doesn't change that nobody's birth is a sin," Eren answered just as softly. "No matter what you are or what you become. We all have the right to be born. To live free."

"What do I do then?" Akeno asked helplessly as she collapsed onto the bench beside him. "With the guilt? With these memories?"

"The only thing you can," Eren shrugged. "You live with them. How you live is up to you, but that doesn't change what happened. So you carry it as you move forward."

"You make it sound easy." Akeno could admit her voice sounded petulant even to her.

"It isn't."

Eren paused as if giving his following words careful thought.

Then he sighed and tilted his face to the sky.

"I killed my parents."

"What?" Akeno asked, the statement coming out of left field. "I thought you were an orphan."

"I am," Eren acknowledged. "That doesn't change that I killed them. I don't mean that they died protecting me or anything like that. I mean, I, myself, killed them. Nobody else."

"Did you... hate them?" Akeno asked, wondering if it had been revenge for leaving him on that church's stoop.

"No," Eren shook his head. "I loved them. Dearly. And they loved me. Wanted the best for me. Worried about me and cared about me. And yet I still killed them."

"Why?"

Akeno could see it in her mind. Eren, maybe a young teen, tracking down his parents to demand the truth. Finding them and finding out they had some reason to leave him at that church. A reunion filled with emotions, maybe even a hint of that rage she saw. But then love. Acceptance. Perhaps Eren had been happy.

For a time.

"With my father, it was an accident. Completely unintentional. He knew it would happen and chose to let me do it anyway. That's how much he loved me. But my mom..."

Akeno noticed the slight dampness of the bandages over Eren's eyes but didn't comment. Nor about the thickness in his voice or his clenched fists.

"I killed my mom. Directly. On purpose. Knowing who she was, what I was doing, and what it would lead to. No matter how much I loved her."

Eren paused, teeth gritt tight enough that Akeno could hear them as his hands tightened on his cane.

"Her last words to me were, 'Don't go.' I don't know if she didn't want to die alone, wanted someone to save her, or wished to see her son one last time. I will never know. I still remember her face as I killed her. The fear. The pain. I will never forget that sight."

That... Shuri's last words had been the complete opposite.

Run, Akeno. Run and live. Please live.

"When I say you will carry the guilt for the rest of your life, I speak from experience," Eren's voice was as heavy as it had ever been. This was a confession to a friend. For all that he claimed that Akeno angered him, Eren would not be confiding in her this terrible secret if he didn't want to reassure her in some small way. To tell her she wasn't alone in her guilt. "Not a moment goes by where I do not feel guilty for all I've done."

"Then why did you do it?" Akeno couldn't help but ask. "Why did you kill her?"

"Because it was necessary," Eren answered immediately with a gasp that choked a sob. "Because it saved the life of a child that I hated. Because I chose a few friends, the future I wanted, over the mother I loved. Because Carla Yeager's death was the start of it all, and it needed to happen if I was to move forward."

"That's it," Akeno said as she held a hand in front of her face. It was slick with bloody dirt, and a half-torn feather was caught in her nails. "Just move forward, no matter how much it hurts? That's terrible advice."

"It's the only advice I have," Eren shrugged, the emotions of the moment bleeding out of him into that familiar weariness. "I can't see your future. Or Rias'. I have no idea what problems you will face or are facing right now. I'll die soon, but I hope you won't. I hope you all lead long, happy lives. To do that, you need to walk forward. Guilt. Fear. Regret. You will carry them with you all your life, but you must continue on. One step at a time. No matter what."

For some reason, her own anger flared at his words. An emotion joining the guilt, the pain, and the self-disgust.

"You don't get to die," Akeno shook her head as she stared at the dirty blood in her hand. "Souna, Rias, Koneko, Yuuto, and I won't let you. Even Issei and Asia won't once you get to know them better. After everything you just told me, you don't get to go off and die. If I have to live with the guilt, so do you."

"I told you," Eren sighed. "I will die alone."

He said it with the certainty of a prophecy, a fact that would come true no matter what.

"No, you won't," Akeno denied fervently. She clenched her fists. "You said you couldn't see the future. I'll let you know I come from a long line of Miko, so I will make a prediction right now. Eren Yeager will live a long, happy life. Just you wait."

Eren clearly didn't believe her, but Akeno didn't care. As he had told her earlier, that was his problem, not hers.

If Akeno Himejima deserved to live, then so did Eren Yeager. If he was going to be selfish, so was she.

Even if he was a mass murderer who killed his parents, a terrible person, that didn't change who she was. Akeno was a rotten woman to her core.

Akeno wasn't going to let anyone else be taken from her.

Even if it meant dirtying herself further.

The blood and feather disintegrated in a quiet crackle of divine lightning. The tiniest of sparks darkened her flesh and stung with pain.

Rias was trusting her. Yuuto and Koneko were trusting her. Even Issei and Asia trusted her, looked up, and went to her for guidance. She could hate herself, but she could not let them down. She needed to be there when they needed her.

Akeno couldn't be Baraqiel.

The trauma was still there. The self-loathing, hatred, guilt, and disgust still filled her. It wouldn't disappear with one conversation or affirmation of conviction.

If Akeno wanted the strength to keep hold of her family, she would need to face those emotions every day. Over and over again, for months, years, potentially for the rest of her life. It was a war of attrition against her own emotions.

She'd always carry that guilt. A part would always hate herself.

But Akeno took that first tiny step forward.

And that was enough, she realized. For now, that tiny, shuffling step was enough.

The worst woman in the world sat with the worst man, companions in culpability, in self-hatred, and in pain.

Guilty? Innocent? It didn't matter in that moment.

They were alive.

They shared the same birthright as they sat together on the bench.

********

Beta: Old man of the mountain/Darklord331

Canonically, Rias' parents ramped up their efforts once Issei was reincarnated, despite their previous agreements. It isn't a stretch to think they are related. At the same time, if Rias had any other recourse but offering her virginity to Issei or a rating game, she probably would have taken it. Outnumbered and outpowered as she was in canon, she didn't think she had a chance. Thus, she only suggested a Rating Game when she felt she had no choice. Something everyone expected, based on Grayfia's words in the book.

Rias has a better chance in this world, thanks to all the extra training, but it is by no means a surefire thing. It was never Riser's Peerage that she worried about, despite their larger numbers. It was his regeneration. Power doesn't matter if the opponent can endure until you run out. Remember, despite having Balance Breaker, Issei only won using holy instruments that he boosted and after he sacrificed an arm. Something most devils would never, could never use.

Akeno's Holy Lightning, despite only being revealed later, recontextualizes a lot of things. For one, it underscores how much trauma is actually there, bubbling under the surface. I don't think she wouldn't have at least tried to use it, but couldn't do it, even to help her best friend.

I liken it to when Eren tried to turn into a titan but kept failing because he couldn't gather the determination properly, too many conflicting emotions.

One thing I love about AOT, and that I am trying to portray in this fic is how characters can have conflicting emotions. They feel guilt for their actions, but they'd do them anyway, even if they hate themselves for it. They'd be determined to do something but vacillate, fear, or second guess themselves. It is an inner conflict that we don't usually see in anime, and I wish to convey, if in some small part, in my stories.

I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, and I'll see you all on the bench.
 
I don't know what I was expecting from an Attac on Titan/Highschool DxD fanfic, but actual unironical good angst definitely wasn't it, eh I lied, I expected a lot more smut
You're on the wrong side of the site for that buddy. But I agree, this is pretty well-written. I find myself excited for every new release.
 
I love it, now we have to wait to see how he finds out how they are taking away Rias's freedom

Eren: "I'm just going to sit here, and wait to die."

giphy.gif
 
I never really understood how Rias could forgive her parents so easily for this. They forced her into an arranged marriage with scum and broke their deal on the time limit.

How could she ever trust them after they forced her to become a trophy wife (and that's not getting into the fact that she would be forced to have sex with the scumbag) and when she had a glimmer of hope they broke that too.

This is the kind of thing that breaks families over and even politically it is a shortsighted move as any possible gains they could have gotten would be overtaken by the fact that Rias and any child she would have would never want to have anything to do with them.
 
Ain't in the NSFW Section. So no lewds, yet.
You're on the wrong side of the site for that buddy. But I agree, this is pretty well-written. I find myself excited for every new release.
I will be honest, I didn't realize that till ya'll said it, this do be in the SFW part of QQ, and I'm also absolutely excited for the new chapters, the only thing that's left is to find if our dear author's estimates for the story's size will be right or if he'll have another 600K story
 
I will be honest, I didn't realize that till ya'll said it, this do be in the SFW part of QQ, and I'm also absolutely excited for the new chapters, the only thing that's left is to find if our dear author's estimates for the story's size will be right or if he'll have another 600K story
Eh. I see OP's other story more of a training ground for him. There he could write a lot about character interactions and explore other stuff. Seems that it paid off.


Hell, I'm still waiting for more chapters for that story. I left around the arc where he's gained access to his Dragon Body.
 
I will be honest, I didn't realize that till ya'll said it, this do be in the SFW part of QQ, and I'm also absolutely excited for the new chapters, the only thing that's left is to find if our dear author's estimates for the story's size will be right or if he'll have another 600K story

In theory, it'll probably be shorter? He's writing following a deadline (Eren's predicted death) and with events already in motion (Kokabiel, Hero Faction, etc). There's only so many butterflies that can change things with how the setting is already.

But it's still cool to see Akeno's trauma dug into deeper. I think this is one of the few times I've seen that explore this trauma in depth; the self mutilation was fabulously disturbing. (Also, it's actually a way that birds will self harm in real life, they pluck their own feathers out, kind of like a person stress pulling their own hair)

I wonder if Rias shot in the dark would be to introduce Gasper to Eren and have Gasper try to freeze Eren in time?
 
Thank you for the fantastic chapter, I really like how you wrote Eren and Akeno here. They both carry a lot of guilt and not small amount of anger, but they have to move forward and I think you captured that idea brilliantly. I also like how you wrote the whole "Akeno has Holy Lightning but never used it", it was that she couldn't use it even if she wanted to. I am very curious to see where you take this next, keep up the good work!
 
I wonder if Rias shot in the dark would be to introduce Gasper to Eren and have Gasper try to freeze Eren in time?
This actually reminded me of a question I had about Gasper, I've seen people saying that after his Sacred Gear evolves into Aeon Balor, he uses his time powers to set things up so canon happens.

It seems like a lie, but it would be nice if someone could confirm or deny it.
 
I never really understood how Rias could forgive her parents so easily for this. They forced her into an arranged marriage with scum and broke their deal on the time limit.

To be honest, Rias is a little clueless. I would imagine that she always thought it was Riser or Riser's parents that broke the time limit she had.
 
I never really understood how Rias could forgive her parents so easily for this. They forced her into an arranged marriage with scum and broke their deal on the time limit.

How could she ever trust them after they forced her to become a trophy wife (and that's not getting into the fact that she would be forced to have sex with the scumbag) and when she had a glimmer of hope they broke that too.

This is the kind of thing that breaks families over and even politically it is a shortsighted move as any possible gains they could have gotten would be overtaken by the fact that Rias and any child she would have would never want to have anything to do with them.
One of the reasons they pushed the marriage forward (other than what the author posted in the latest chapter), was because they wanted grandkids (the faster, the better).

They thought it was all a phase and it will pass in time. And since her father was good friends with riser's father, they pushed the marriage even more.

The thing is Rias has the most insane passive growth rate and potential in the entire series. In canon she is almost to power level of her brother minus the hax.

All devils do have potential and passive growth (kinda) and they cap when they reach adulthood, you have to actually train to reach above your cap and all devils are way too lazy to actually try. Riser only trained after the humiliating defeat to Issei (anything holy or divine completely shuts down phenex regen), and after he "healed" from his depression.

Riser is the 3rd son, actually kinda useless in the family so they wanted to marry him to a family and kick him out so to speak. He would be a gremory and subservient to Rias (she is higher politically than him).

Tldr her parents were afraid she will grow stronger than riser, beat him and surpass him (she would after a year or 2), but issei and canon happened, and they pushed the date forward.
 
Tbh I've always thought the scene where Venelena goes on about Rias' selfishness at dinner when Issei first goes to hell is so hilariously whack. Full on 'you've shamed the Gremory enough already' or something. Hard to imagine how she could alienate her daughter further.
 
Delusions of Kindness
Two figures appeared from a clump of mist in a ruined church's basement.

"Exact coordinates as always," the shorter figure in glasses said with pleasure.

"Let's get this over with," the taller, much more muscular man grumbled. "I hate his assignments. No excitement."

"I like them," the shorter figure argued lightly, stepping over a ritual circle and looking at the large metal crucifix in the center. "Perfectly laid out step-by-step guides. Like a walkthrough. Can you imagine how hard it would be to find a Sacred Gear extractor outside Grigori control on our own? Even this one would have rotted in the basement of this no-name town whose only special feature is the devil heiresses playing house."

"Can I at least go fight them," the large man asked, hoisting the metal construct on his shoulder. "They're the Satans' sisters. They should give a good fight."

"Hm," the glasses-wearing boy hummed as he flipped through a book, reading its instructions. "No, Herc, you can't."

"Did he at least tell me why this time?"

"He doesn't. But I can guess. There is no other supernatural force in this town currently. They are all out. That's why we only came now. Apparently, the entire plan falls apart if we are discovered in Kuoh."

"Fine," Herc sighed. "Vali should be visiting soon anyway. He's always good for brawl."

"I would prefer if you didn't start fights you can't win."

"Nobody's asking you, Georg."

"Maybe I should leave you somewhere on the way back? What was that strip joint called again? 'Wangs Wonderful Wangs?'" Georg said to himself. "I heard you had fun last time. Maybe you'll actually get lucky and find someone 'man enough' for you."

"You wouldn't dare," Herc said confidently. "You won't do anything against the plan."

"I might," Georg said casually. "He'd know I'd do it. That would be part of the plan in the first place, wouldn't it?"

That seemed to stump the muscular man.

"I wish the boss was back," Herc grumbled. "At least I knew I could try and sock him one when one of his plans screwed me over."

"And achieve nothing," Georg said lightly. "But yes, I do agree. Most of us miss him. But what can you do? Wherever he is, we won't find him until he wants us to."

"That better be soon," Herc continued to grumble as they were swallowed by the mists, Gear extractor and all. "That damn cat is getting on my nerves."

********

"Surrender, Rias!"

"AAAGGGHHH."

Rias closed her eyes, biting her lip hard enough to bleed.

Anything to tune out Issei's screams.

It had been going so well.

Better than her wildest dreams.

Her Peerage had made quick work of their enemies, Koneko and Yuuto, retiring due to surprise attacks but only after clearing most of the way. Asia had fallen while healing Issei, and Riser took the field himself.

Despite that, the Gremory faction was winning.

Easily.

Their additional power, coordination, and Rias' help as a long-range Wizard-Type had wiped the floor with Riser's Peerage. The Phenex had obviously chosen them all for their looks rather than skill, power, or synergy.

The only risk they faced had been the Bomb Queen, the one who took out Koneko.

Akeno had toyed with the rival Queen. Played with and tortured her. Taunting and mocking her into frothing rage. Even the Phenex trump card, their tears, hadn't helped as Akeno had been glad to 'have a fresh toy.'

Issei had been stellar. Above and beyond what could have been expected of a new devil.

Responsible for half the total retirements on the other side, his durability and strength as a Rook boosted to absurd degrees thanks to Boosted Gear, which made him an absolute unit on the battlefield. A wrecking ball on the field.

Spells, blades, and fists had bounced right off him. His most significant contribution had been getting Ravel Phenex to give up after she took out Yuuto.

Somehow.

Rias still didn't know how Issei had done it.

The four of them, Akeno, Asia, Issei, and her, had faced Riser together. With his immortality, it would still be a long shot, but Rias had seen hope.

Losing Asia early to the Phenex had been a blow, but it had galvanized Issei to new heights, and he discovered he could transfer his power to another person. Taking the healer out had given Akeno a straight shot at Riser.

"I can do this forever!" Riser crowed with malicious glee. He was taking pleasure in the pain he was inflicting. Revenge for the reversal of his fortunes and the pain he had already suffered. "Surrender!"

"GRRRGK." Even though her eyes were closed, Rias could hear Issei try to grit his teeth against the pain.

"Rias?" Akeno asked softly.

Opening her eyes, the heiress looked at her Queen, her best friend, her sister in all but blood.

Akeno looked back, their eyes meeting in silent communication.

Words could not express how thankful she was to every one of her Peerage fighting for her freedom. Everyone, especially Issei, had gone above and beyond what could be expected of them.

Yet Akeno was the one Rias was most grateful for.

Not only had her Queen been with her every step of the way for years, every minute of training, blood, sweat, and tears, but Akeno had done the one thing Rias could never ask her to do.

Holy Lightning crackled around the 'Priestess of Thunder.'

It was raw, uncontrolled, blackening Akeno's skin in places where it touched her body. She hadn't practiced much with it, but that she was using it at all spoke of her commitment.

It proved that Akeno was part fallen angel to everyone watching, or would watch, this unofficial ratting game.

Akeno had borne her deepest wounds, her greatest shame, to the Underworld.

For Rias.

Rias Gremory was so Satan-damn lucky to have such a wonderful family.

"AAAAAHHHHHH!"

Which made her failings as King all the more apparent.

With Akeno's Holy Lightning, boosted by every ounce of power Issei could give, they had trounced Riser. The divine spell weakened his healing, leaving him vulnerable to all three of them.

Riser was an older devil on the cusp of reaching Ultimate Class.

Yet a teenager and her Peerage had beaten him into the ground.

And Rias showed her immaturity. Her weakness.

Her failure.

She had been too kind.

All it would take to clinch the victory was to get his surrender. Despite being beaten badly, he was still a Phenex. A devil house famous for their stamina and recovery, even outside of their immortality.

She had underestimated his pride and the wounds inflicted on it. She had overestimated her own control of the situation.

Intoxicated with victory and the promise of freedom, Rias failed in her duty to her family.

Rather than let Akeno torture the man into unconsciousness, as she should have done, she had told her Queen to stop. His cries of pain had been getting to her.

Rias hated Riser. Despised him with every fibre of her being.

But it had never been about Riser himself.

It hadn't been his man-whore mannerisms, his disregard for humanity or his foppish attitude that angered her so much. Riser was actually one of the better young devils out there. Harems weren't rare in the Underworld, and he clearly cared for his family. More than that, his Peerage clearly cared for him, which was more than many devils could claim.

It hadn't even been about her duty to marry someone to carry on the Gremory name and lineage that angered Rias. Riser marrying into her family would have been an acceptable choice, all things considered. Even if he was not a good devil, he was not a bad one either.

Rias had never hated Riser Phenex for who he was.

Rias Gremory hated Riser Phenex because of what he meant to her.

It had never been about Riser himself but about Rias. It had always been about her freedom and ability to choose her path.

Riser was the chain she needed to shake off, the physical representation of everything she hated about being Rias Gremory instead of Rias.

So, she wanted to give Riser a chance. The chance to surrender and spare himself the pain all devils felt when assaulted by Light. Riser hadn't chosen this engagement either. He was as bound by this promise of their families as she was. Riser lusted after Rias and desired her; that was clear, but maybe he loved someone else or didn't want to marry at all.

Maybe he, a third son of a prominent family, didn't want to be married off to the Gremorys.

Riser could have withdrawn in grace, clearly outmatched, and having held on longer than expected when exposed to Holy Lightning powered by a Longinus.

A grace. A hand extended.

A kindness.

And now?

Issei was paying the price for her failure.

A devil's pride was a terrible thing indeed.

"Gaw!" Issei gasped in pain, writhing and twitching in Riser's hands as more fire burned away at his skin.

Riser's face, twisted in a pained grimace yet still smirking, differed from his usual pretty boy demeanour.

He had been beaten but had never given up. He'd seized his one chance, the Gremory's famous soft spot for their Peerage. And he was relishing the impending victory.

The pride of the Phenex had been trampled, but he had not let it down.

The older devil held the Rook between him and Akeno. Rias was behind the Phenex, making an effort to flank him and free her Rook.

Riser didn't care.

All he cared about was keeping Holy Lightning away. Rias' attacks? They could hurt him, but he'd still regenerate. Any attack Akeno tried to throw would hurt Issei just as bad.

Rias was stuck, victory at her fingertips, yet unable to clench her hands around it.

If Sona was here? She was sure her rival would have some cunning ploy, tactic, or trap to get Issei out of Riser's grip. She could imagine Sona watching the match right now, adjusting her glasses as she did when nervous while complaining about Rias' mistakes and still hoping for the best.

If Eren was here? Well... Rias was sure he wouldn't have given Riser a chance to speak, let alone escape and capture a hostage. Eren would have been entirely merciless.

Rias was glad he wasn't watching.

She didn't want Eren to see her like this.

This weak.

This pathetic.

"Choose!" Riser insisted with another pillar of fire. The longer this continued, the higher the likelihood that Issei would pass out and retire.

"AHH," Issei screamed.

Rias wished Issei was a Pawn. He would have retired by now. But he was a Rook, and none of the damage he had taken was fatal.

Should she use Casteling? Switching places with Issei would save him but would be the same as surrendering. Riser would have her in his grasp, and he'd eliminate her.

Rias had a choice.

Victory or defeat.

No matter what she chose here, Rias would lose something.

Rias knew what she would have chosen a year ago. She would have surrendered and gone on to get married to this odious man in exchange for the safety of her Peerage. Her life in the human world would have been over.

Her freedom would have been gone.

From a certain standpoint, it made no sense not to chase victory. Issei wouldn't die from this. It was just pain, not debilitating or anything. Even the Holy aspect, which severely affected devils and skirted around the rules of Rating Games, could be cured by Asia later.

But could Rias be the one to inflict that pain on Issei? The boy she had already wronged? The boy who had trained, fought, and was being tortured for her freedom?

Could she give an order which might mean he lost what little trust he had in her?

Issei, like all her Peerage, had scars.

If she hadn't been paying careful attention, she would have missed it in their frenetic training, too caught up in her own drama.

But spending so much time training had forced her to be much more observant with her Peerage in what little time she did have with them.

Rias saw it.

She saw it when he flinched from female touch, even as he craved it.

Saw it when Asia practically threw herself at him, and he stood befuddled.

As if the idea of being loved was alien to him.

Issei was an honest boy. Honest about his feelings, his dreams, and his perversion.

That honesty, that baring of himself, had been betrayed by someone he had poured his heart out to.

Could Rias Gremory scar her Rook again? For a selfish desire for freedom?

"Do, grrrh, IT!" Issei shouted in a moment when the fire lessened.

Riser lit him up again, and coherence left the boy who had been a regular human only a month ago. An ordinary boy thrust into exceptional circumstances through no fault of his own.

"See," the Phenex said with a smile as he looked over his shoulder at Rias. "Even the Red Dragon Emperor wants you to surrender. Cease your struggles. Become my bride. And I will stop hurting the boy."

That hadn't been what Issei meant at all.

Rias closed her eyes again as the tears fell.

She didn't deserve such a wonderful Peerage.

'A person who cannot sacrifice everything cannot change anything.'

'Choose what you cannot sacrifice. Hold on to it. No matter what else you lose.'

She couldn't give up on the happiness she had found in her freedom.

Watching anime with Gasper. Training with Akeno. Cooking snacks for Koneko and napping on the couch. Reading with Yuuto. Teasing Issei. Helping Asia explore the world.

Rias could not give up the hope she held to eventually be strong enough to reincarnate Eren, to show him a life far from the pain of war and loss.

At that moment, Rias Gremeory wanted nothing more than to be on that uncomfortable bench.

She wanted her greatest worry to be whether or not she could accurately explain the wacky hijinks of the latest Jojo chapter in a way Eren could understand.

At that moment, Rias Gremory was not in a ruined facsimile of her school, facing a man who threatened to be her husband. She wasn't fighting for her freedom under the eyes of her family and the Underworld.

She wasn't deciding whether or not to torture one of her newest family members.

At that moment, Rias Gremory didn't exist.

'Rias' was on a bench, talking and laughing with her friends as a blind, sickly boy listened in quiet contentment.

That was what she could not sacrifice.

She would do anything to return to that bench and what it meant for her.

"Akeno," Rias said, opening her eyes.

She needed to see this out to the end.

To see what her kindness and failure had cost.

"Rias?" Akeno asked again, waiting for the order.

Rias stared not at her Queen or the blond man who had haunted her nightmares for years.

She stared at the scorched body of her Rook. Issei weakly met her eyes over his shoulders, barely able to lift his head.

Rias stared into those brown eyes as she gave the order.

"Do it."

The crackle and thunder of Holy Lightning.

The shout of surprise and pain of a man whose plan had failed.

The weak cries of a boy already on the brink.

The sounds of the death of a love that could have been, should have been, but now never would be.

It all drowned out another sound.

[Welsh Dragon Balance Breaker]

********

Beta: Old man of the mountain/Darklord331

One thing that is rarely shown in Shonen shows is how much kindness can cost. The power of love and friendship conquers all yadda yadda. I like kind characters, but there is a price for kindness. Stories that show that price and force the characters to pay it to rise above the easy path are generally better, in my opinion. More real. Look at AOT or Vinland Saga.

Before someone points out that Riser is acting out of character, I will remind you that he does hold Issei hostage in the Rating Game for Rias' surrender. He's better than a lot of fanfiction likes to portray him as, but he is still a dick. He also has his pride, not backing down from the pain Issei inflicts on him with holy instruments. He could have, and would have, kept fighting if Issei hadn't knocked him out with boosted holy water.

As I said, I try to stick to the canon characteristics as much as possible. The good and the bad. For Rias and Riser.

I will see you all next time on the bench.
 

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