[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[LordofBones]

*The Gods are summoned and Salem is defeated*

Ozpin: *closing his eyes* "At last...I...I can rest..."
God of Darkness: "Haha no, fuck that. Enjoy the next five thousand years of playing bodyjacker."
Ozpin: "...what."
God of Light: "Yeah, no, we're not doing this, Ozma."
Ozpin: "WHY?!"

God of Darkness/Light: "I see no Arkos/Lancaster here, how could you have fucked that up?!"
Darkness: "...You mean Arkos, don't you brother?"
Light: "You can't seriously deny that Lancaster is the natural conclusion-"
Darkness: "PYRRHA WAS DONE DIRTY, DAMMIT!"
Light: "LANCASTER IS FULL OF FLUFF AND SWEETNESS!"
Darkness: "LITTLE MISS MARTYR OVER THERE COULDN'T RAISE A PUPPY WITHOUT ABANDONING IT TO CRUSADE AGAINST THE FORCES OF EVIL!"
Light: "GUESS WHO DID MARTYR HERSELF? I BET WHAT'S LEFT OF HER'S BEING SNORTED BY SOME HOMELESS ADDICT!"

Ozpin: "I...what...you can't be serious-"
Darkness/Light: "Does it look like we're joking?"
Ozpin: "But...but...look, there's Miss Belladonna and Miss Xiao-Long hugging and kissing! Surely, that's proof of-"
Darkness: "By our horns, everyone knows Bumbleby is a statistic waiting to happen."
Light: "At least we got here before-"

Animal God: "Am I too late to argue for Knightshade?"
The Blacksmith: "Boys, what did I say about challenging the supremacy of White Knight?"
The Breaker/Aslan/YHVH: *sends visions of a surprised golden she-dragon being hauled over a knight's shoulder*

 

[Gur40]

*The Gods are summoned and Salem is defeated*

Ozpin: *closing his eyes* "At last...I...I can rest..."
God of Darkness: "Haha no, fuck that. Enjoy the next five thousand years of playing bodyjacker."
Ozpin: "...what."
God of Light: "Yeah, no, we're not doing this, Ozma."
Ozpin: "WHY?!"

God of Darkness/Light: "I see no Arkos/Lancaster here, how could you have fucked that up?!"
Darkness: "...You mean Arkos, don't you brother?"
Light: "You can't seriously deny that Lancaster is the natural conclusion-"
Darkness: "PYRRHA WAS DONE DIRTY, DAMMIT!"
Light: "LANCASTER IS FULL OF FLUFF AND SWEETNESS!"
Darkness: "LITTLE MISS MARTYR OVER THERE COULDN'T RAISE A PUPPY WITHOUT ABANDONING IT TO CRUSADE AGAINST THE FORCES OF EVIL!"
Light: "GUESS WHO DID MARTYR HERSELF? I BET WHAT'S LEFT OF HER'S BEING SNORTED BY SOME HOMELESS ADDICT!"

Ozpin: "I...what...you can't be serious-"
Darkness/Light: "Does it look like we're joking?"
Ozpin: "But...but...look, there's Miss Belladonna and Miss Xiao-Long hugging and kissing! Surely, that's proof of-"
Darkness: "By our horns, everyone knows Bumbleby is a statistic waiting to happen."
Light: "At least we got here before-"

Animal God: "Am I too late to argue for Knightshade?"
The Blacksmith: "Boys, what did I say about challenging the supremacy of White Knight?"
The Breaker/Aslan/YHVH: *sends visions of a surprised golden she-dragon being hauled over a knight's shoulder*

Click to shrink...

Imagine The Gods as voices 'helping' there pick
GoD: Arkos
GoL: Lancaster
Blacksmith: WhiteKnight
Animal God: Knightshade
Breaker: Dragonslayer

Pyrrha Has Cinder Fall over as the Grimm Parasite That Is The TRUE Fall Maiden Jumps Ship Like a Symbiote And Suddenly Ruling The Grimm To Salem Horror

Ruby gets Sharingan level upgrades by the GoL and Maria a dream vision to go to Vale

Weiss gets a call from her mom who see's Jaune and ask if he' Nick son, one love sick regret filled speech later and Weiss is investing in the Himbo Stocks

Blake getting visions by her God to help Human Faunus relations... the kinky way

And Yang a biblically accurate angel meme or DxD Gabriel which ever is funnier

Spoiler: Sad Jess

 

[SpaceK0k0nut]

snip

Click to shrink...

now cue cinder showing up at Beacon and having a very awkward meeting with her sorta-half-cousin Jaune