[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[AndrewJTalon]

The Hellenic League (also called the Argive League or Western Anima Confederation) is a loose confederation of independent city-states (poleis) clustered along the western coast of Anima, in what is now nominally part of Mistral but functions as a de facto autonomous region. Geographically, it occupies fertile coastal plains, hilly hinterlands, and strategic harbors, making it a major trade hub connecting Vale, Vacuo, and the rest of Anima. Culturally, it blends ancient Hellenic traditions (philosophy, theater, athletics, democratic/oligarchic governance experiments) with heavy Mistralian influences (elegant calligraphy, silk-like textiles, Confucian-style bureaucracy in administration, and dragon motifs in art/architecture from the era of Iksander's conquests).



Historical Background

The League traces its origins to the pre-Tablebreaker era, when the Hellenic poleis were unified under Iksander the Great (the Alexander analogue, a legendary conqueror and distant ancestor of Pyrrha Nikos). Iksander's empire exploded outward from the western coast, conquering much of Anima (including Mistral proper), northern Vale, parts of Vacuo, and even reaching into distant Pandu, Rostram, and Taejo. His campaigns spread Hellenic language, art, philosophy, and military tactics (phalanx formations, hoplite warfare) across continents, while absorbing eastern elements that gave rise to the Greco-Mistralian fusion seen in modern Argus (e.g., columned temples with pagoda roofs, Olympic-style games alongside Mistralian festivals).



After Iksander's death, the empire fragmented rapidly. The western poleis reformed as the Hellenic League to preserve their independence and cultural identity. Later, the Quintalan Empire conquered much of western Anima, imposing centralized administration, roads, aqueducts, and legal codes while allowing local governance and Hellenic customs to persist. The Quintalan collapse left the League semi-independent again, nominally under Mistral but effectively self-ruling due to Mistral's chronic disunity. Over the next several centuries Mistral would at times rule over the Hellenes, then lose their grip while other powers rose and fell. They were briefly ruled over by the tyrannical Witch Queen of Argus, but this dictator was slain in single combat by the legendary Jeanne D'Arc of Radian, who went home and left the poleis to rebuild themselves. The Eastern Sanusian nations that would eventually form Vale competed to rule the poleis for centuries while colonizing and building empires across Remnant, but still the Hellenes would hold onto their cultural identity.



In the modern era (post-Great War), the League maintains nominal allegiance to Mistral (sending tribute delegates to the capital, acknowledging the loose confederation) but operates with near-total autonomy. It hosts an Atlas military base in Argus, enjoys strong trade ties with Vale and a military base in Asterius, and trades with Vacuo, Pandu, Fuujin, Taejo, Rostram and Menagerie. This independence rankles Mistral hardliners (especially Yellow Dragon expansionists), but the League's naval strength and Atlas/Valean backing deter direct interference.



Religiously, the League converted en masse to the Tablebreaker faith centuries ago. Ancient Olympian worship mostly survives only in folklore, festivals, art, literature and music—temples are for the most part now repurposed as churches or museums, though there are some followers of it still.



Major City-States

The League comprises dozens of poleis, but seven form the core council (the "Seven Eyes," nodding to Argus Panoptes). Each is named for a Hellenic monster/mythical figure, reflecting ancient founding myths where heroes tamed or descended from such beings.



Argus (largest, de facto capital; Athens analogue with Argos heritage) Patron heritage: Argus Panoptes (the all-seeing giant).
Modern role: Intellectual/cultural center; philosophy academies, theaters, bustling markets, universities and strong tech base. Strong democratic traditions (assembly votes on major policy). Hosts the League's Pan-Hellenic Games every four years. Allows Atlas base; Pyrrha Nikos's ancestral home. Fiercely proud, views itself as cultural superior to "barbarian" Mistral. Powerful navy.
Asterius (Sparta analogue) Patron heritage: Asterius the Minotaur (labyrinthine strength).
Modern role: Militaristic powerhouse; rigorous agoge-style training for youth, elite hoplite/phalanx units. Semi-democratic but primarily oligarchic rule by warrior council. Rival to Argus (historical wars over border lands); emphasizes discipline over philosophy. Has a Valean military base. Excellent infantry and special forces and world class military academy.
Chiron (Corinth analogue) Patron heritage: Chiron the wise centaur.
Modern role: Commercial/trade hub; strategic isthmus-like ports, shipbuilding, finance. Balanced democratic oligarchy with merchant-prince families. Hosts smaller Isthmian-style games focused on water sports. Massive fishing industries.
Medusa (Thebes analogue) Patron heritage: Medusa the Gorgon (petrifying gaze as metaphor for unyielding defense).
Modern role: Fortified inland stronghold; strong walls, Boeotian League-style federation of nearby towns. History of siding with invaders, leading to lingering distrust from other poleis. Has excellent relations with Vacuo, Fuujin, and others-Has many casinos and centers of financial trade.
Polyphemus (Macedon analogue) Patron heritage: Polyphemus the Cyclops (raw strength, one-eyed vision as strategic foresight).
Modern role: Northern/mountainous region; heavy Dust and other mining operations, mechanized and other cavalry-heavy armies, expansionist history. Constitutional monarchy; supplies heavy infantry and military machinery to League defense and hosts many PMCs and tech companies, especially military oriented.
Typhon (Delphi analogue) Patron heritage: Typhon the storm giant.
Modern role: Oracle/shrine center; Tablebreaker monastery on volcanic slopes, but also the old Olympian Oracle temple where visions of the future can be read to the believers. Hosts Pythian-style games with musical/poetic contests alongside athletics. Artistic and scholarly, with music and dance academies and a focus on the humanities as well as religious and literary archives. Also features a Huntsman Academy; trains Huntsmen with emphasis on beast-slaying lore. Produces many elite warriors and support personnel for Hunters Association, PMCs, and militaries. Neutral arbiter in League disputes.
Echidna (Samos analogue) Patron heritage: Echidna the Mother of Monsters (serpent-woman, progenitor of beasts; reframed as primordial earth/sea mother or guardian spirit whose "offspring" were tamed by heroes).
Modern role: Island polis off the western coast; major maritime/trade power with fertile plains and strategic harbors. Famous for its grand Heraion sanctuary (repurposed as a Tablebreaker cathedral blending Hera iconography with serpent-mother motifs—e.g., sacred willow/serpent motifs in art). Engineering and philosophical schools. Balanced oligarchy with merchant and priestly families. Leans more towards Vacuo due to ancient relations in the past but tries to stay fairly neutral.


Smaller poleis include Chimera, Hydra, Scylla/Charybdis, Harpy, and many others, each with unique local customs but subordinate to the Seven in League matters.



Government & Society

Loose confederation: Annual council in Argus (rotating presidency). Each polis sends delegates; decisions require supermajority. Common defense, trade pacts, Games organization.
Internal rivalries: Fierce (Argus vs. Asterius debates, Medusa's old "traitor" stigma). Ostracism/exile for overly ambitious leaders or traitors rather than execution-Making them brave the wilds and Grimm alone is seen as a suitable punishment.
Pan-Hellenic Games: Major unifying event (every 4 years in Argus; cycle includes regional variants in Chiron/Typhon). Events: foot races, pentathlon (wrestling, long jump, javelin, discus, stadion), combat sports (boxing, pankration—no biting/gouging), chariot and horse racing. Winners get wreaths (olive in Argus, laurel in Typhon, etc.); multiple victories earn statues. Pyrrha's wins boosted her fame/prestige across the League alongside her wins in more traditional combat leagues.
Modern character: Culturally arrogant (Hellenic superiority complex vs. "barbarians" who aped their philosophy and culture), but pragmatic (trade with Vale/Vacuo, Atlas and Vale bases for security). Corrupt politics, but strong civic pride and checks.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Jaune holds a town hall for the Vytal Festival.

It does about as well as you might expect.

Chapter Text
The backstage of Vale's Government Tower town hall was filled with nervous energy, as the faint buzz from the packed theater drifted through the curtains. The air was thick with the scent of Yang Xiao Long's citrusy perfume and the faint tang of stage lights warming up. Jaune Arc, reluctant councilman and festival planner, stood in a cluttered dressing area, his blonde hair slicked back as Yang dabbed makeup on his face with a practiced hand. His blue eyes darted nervously, lips muttering a mantra to steady himself.

"Okay… Okay… I'm going to do okay… I'm going to do okay…" Jaune breathed, gripping the edge of a folding chair.

Pyrrha Nikos, radiant in her bronze armor, leaned forward with a warm smile. "You'll be fine!"

Weiss Schnee, clipboard in hand, adjusted her pristine white jacket. "Just follow the notes. That said, I still can't believe you were put in charge of planning the Vytal Festival!"

"He's not in charge, he's just the key Committee Member," Blake observed, barely looking up from her Scroll.

"I memorized the notes," Jaune said, voice steadier now. He glanced around, brow furrowing. "Who's on snack table duty?"

Nora Valkyrie bounced on her heels, hammer slung over her shoulder. "I am!"

Ren, ever calm beside her, deadpanned, "There is no more snack table."

Yang paused, makeup brush hovering. "Wait, I thought Ruby said she was doing it."

"That's why there's no more snack table!" Nora chirped, unapologetic.

Jaune's face paled. "Oh God…"

"Nora reassigned Ruby to security!" Nora added, grinning.

Weiss pinched the bridge of her nose. "Ren? Please calm him down?"

"I've got this," Yang declared, yanking Jaune's face into her chest with a playful smirk.

"MMPH?!" Jaune flailed, voice muffled against her sweater.

"It's scientifically proven that men calm down when they touch boobs! Especially big ones!" Yang teased, winking at Pyrrha.

Pyrrha's cheeks flared red. "W-Well, I can do that just as well!" She pulled Jaune into her chest, armor clinking.

"MMPH!" Jaune's arms waved desperately.

"Not as well as I can!" Yang tugged him back, grinning.

Weiss groaned, tossing her ponytail. "Always about boobs with you people…"

Blake Belladonna, lounging nearby with a book, smirked without looking up. "You're jealous."

"OF COURSE I'M JEALOUS!" Weiss snapped, then froze, mortified.

Blake's amber eyes glinted. "The first step is admitting it."

Weiss's face burned as Jaune, still caught in the tug-of-war, waved his arms like a drowning man. Nora tilted her head. "I think he's choking!"

Weiss muttered, "Wouldn't happen with me."

Sun Wukong burst in, shirt predictably unbuttoned, tail flicking. "GUYS! We're all set!"

Jaune gasped for air as Yang and Pyrrha released him. "Bwah…! Sun?"

"Hey! Blake asked me to help, and I thought, cool! Let's do government things!" Sun grinned.

"Yes, government things," Blake added with a nod.

"Oh… Thank you," Jaune said, catching his breath.

Weiss eyed Sun's open shirt. "Still not buttoning up, I see."

"Nope!" Sun said, unabashed. "Blake says it's for the female voters!"

"Well… Thank you, Blake," Jaune said, raising an eyebrow.

"I'll go introduce you with Ruby!" Sun said, bounding toward the stage.

"Oh, well, thanks…" Jaune muttered, straightening his tie.

Out at the microphone, the crowd's murmur filled the hall, a mix of curious citizens and opportunistic reporters. Sun grabbed the mic with flair as Ruby flanked him.

"Introducing… a really nice guy who loaned me sooo many pencils! You have no idea how many pencils, he was loaded with pencils!"

Ruby, in her red cloak, added: "Also, he can recite all the lyrics of Super Hyper Dimensional Fortress Evangelion! In Fuujin! It was amazing!"

"Councilman Jaune Arc!" Sun finished, throwing an arm out.

Jaune emerged to scattered applause, stepping into the spotlight as his friends took seats or stood nearby. He adjusted the mic, voice steady despite the sweat on his brow. "Thank you, guys. So, this town hall is to address your questions about the Vytal Festival. So, feel free to start asking!"

A Faunus with sharp dog ears stood, voice sharp. "Why are you giving the SDC a platform?! Even after all the allegations against their mistreatment of Faunus!"

Jaune nodded, unfazed, as Weiss and Blake nodded approvingly. "We're also giving Menagerie a platform, despite the fact that many Faunus from there support the White Fang's terrorist activities. It's my hope we can foster a dialogue between Faunus and humans who aren't at the extremes of the conflict, and help improve things. This is just after Menagerie made official diplomatic ties with Vale, despite the White Fang's attack on the Queen Star of Eridu airship liner last year. Vale is trying to act as a mediator in this ongoing conflict, so we must be as neutral as possible. Next question?"

Weiss and Blake spared him a small smile each. It made him feel confident as the Faunus sat down, looking satisfied.

A female voice rang out, bold and teasing. "How long is your dick?"

Jaune's face flushed. "Next question!"

A higher voice squeaked, "COCO!"

Coco Adel, sunglasses glinting, grinned from the crowd. "Shush, Velv! You were gonna ask it later!"

Velvet Scarlatina, ears drooping with bright red cheeks, muttered, "I literally wasn't, stop projecting…"

Russel Thrush shot up, mohawk quivering. "Yeah! Why are Hunters-in-training banned from alcohol until we're 21 like the rest of these losers?! We should be allowed to get hammered too!"

"That's… not related to Vytal," Jaune said, blinking.

"It's bullshit!" Russel snapped. "You grew up drinking wine since you were five!"

"That's because the laws are different in Gallia, not Vale Proper," Jaune explained.

"Then change them!" Russel demanded.

"Next question!" Jaune said quickly. Russel looked like he was about to say more, but Cardin Winchester glared death at him and he pouted in silence.

A man stood, voice tight. "Excuse me, Mr. Arc. This isn't a question as much as a complaint… but I live on property near where Vytal will take place, and your orange-haired teammate destroyed some of the trees I was growing. I just wanted to say… The hell, man?! They weren't even in the way!"

All eyes turned to Nora, who shrank slightly. "…Whoops."

Jaune sighed. "Ah, yes… Nora got a little carried away, but the city insurance policy will pay you back for that. And Nora will be more careful in the future."

Nora waved sheepishly. "SORRY!"

Lisa Lavender, ever the vulture, stood with her microphone. "Mr. Arc, how big is your harem, and which girl will have your child first?"

"No comment, next question!" Jaune said, voice firm.

A new voice cut through—A blonde and brash young lady in leather with goggles, pigtails, and large… Assets.

"Hey! I'm Burnice White! I'm from New Eridu!"

"Oh, uh, welcome to Vale?" Jaune said, confused.

"Thanks! So! When are we declaring war on New Eridu?" Burnice asked, grinning.

"I don't have that—What?" Jaune stammered.

Seth, a wiry Mistralian, shot up. "You can't declare war on New Eridu! It's part of Mistral!"

"So declare war on Mistral!" Burnice countered.

"Why?" Seth asked.

"They took away my liquor license!" Burnice huffed.

Jaune pinched his nose. "That's something we settle in civil court, not via warfare."

Another man stood, face red. "Hey, Arc! Your sister photoshopped my face onto a Grimm and sent it to my girlfriend! Fuck you! I can't say that to her because she's a kid, but… fuck you, dude!"

The crowd stared, dumbfounded. Jaune blinked. "I'm… sorry, I guess? I'll talk to her after?"

"Ladies and gentlemen," Pyrrha said, raising her hands, "we're here about the Vytal Festival. We should keep our focus on that, right?"

Lisa Lavender struck again. "Mr. Arc, is it true what Jacques Schnee tweeted not five minutes ago? That you're marrying his daughter? What happened to staying neutral?"

Jaune shook his head. "I'm not marrying Weiss Schnee. I don't know what Jacques said, but I'm not. Weiss can confirm that right now."

Weiss muttered, "…Damn it…" Flustered, she stood. "I-I mean… this is false! I would never marry this… perverted creep!"

She turned to Jaune, whispering, "I'm so sorry, I panicked!"

Cameras flashed like a lightning storm.

Jaune raised an eyebrow. "Then fix it while panicking?"

Weiss stammered, "I-I mean, he's not a pervert, he's an… okay guy? I guess?"

Lisa Lavender pounced. "Ms. Schnee, are you backtracking out of fear of repercussions from Councilman Arc? And Mr. Arc, what are your favorite kinks?"

"OKAY!" Jaune barked. "Anyone with questions about the Vytal Festival, in here! If you don't, please leave. Don't care where you go, but you can't stay here."

Half the crowd shuffled out, muttering. A lone guy stood. "Is there gonna be a waterslide this year?"

"Yes! There will be a waterslide!" Jaune said, relieved.

Lisa, undeterred, pressed, "Miss Schnee, is it true Councilman Arc is blackmailing you for sex?"

"Nobody is blackmailing anyone for sex!" Jaune snapped.

A woman in the crowd snorted. "True, who would need to be blackmailed into sex with him? I bet Schnee is gay. Who could turn that down?"

"She's not gay!" Ruby shouted. "She's got too bad of taste to be gay!"

"Shut up Ruby!" Weiss growled.

An older man stood, voice stern. "I have one. Mr. Arc, you're a first-year at Beacon Academy, miraculously given a position of power you are, without a doubt, completely unprepared for. You surround yourself with companions who cause nothing but chaos and destruction, unapologetically, mind you. Now you're given creative control over this very important tradition to honor all academies and lands together, and you all seem to be treating this like a joke. Is this a joke to you, Mr. Arc? Are you and your friends, who, mind you, have no official status in the government, going to treat this like a joke?"

Yang winced. "He… has a point…"

Ruby puffed out her cheeks. "We help!"

Blake muttered, "Do we?"

Jaune straightened, voice firm. "No, sir, I take this very seriously. My great-grandmother was Queen Arturia Pendragon, and she encouraged me to give this my all. I'm going to do this job to the best of my ability and make sure the Festival is a success. And while my friends are… chaotic, they do help and support me and do a lot of great stuff behind the scenes. They do, in fact, have official positions in the government as my staff—part-time due to their studies. The fact they do as much for me as they can is a testament to how much I trust them."

The old man nodded, satisfied. "I'm glad to hear it." He paused. "Also, tell the girl who ate all the cookies from the snack table earlier… my wife and I run a bakery, and we'd be more than happy to provide cookies for her… weapons presentation she was muttering about earlier."

A Valean man stood, voice sharp. "Excuse me, Mr. Arc, as a Valean patriot to a Valean patriot, don't you find it strange that Atlesians are in charge of security? What is the VDF doing? What is the National Security Bureau doing? And are you sure holding the Festival amidst these turbulent times is a good idea?"

Jaune nodded. "I agree it's strange, but the Council voted. I voted against it. The argument was that the VDF hasn't recovered sufficiently, even with the new budget to rearm, to do the job, and with the Breach, the security arrangements were inadequate. If we stop the Festival, we allow the terrorists who did the Breach to dictate our policy. We will not give in to fear."

Another voice piped up, sly. "Question from Spook Shack. Is it true every generation of Arcs has a harem?"

"No. That is not true," Jaune said, deadpan.

Lisa Lavender stood again. "Mr. Arc, an actual question this time."

Jaune's tone went flat. "That would be a first."

Lisa plowed on ahead, ignoring this.

"Do you think Ironwood is overstepping his jurisdiction by pushing for Atlesian security? Is the general too eager to assert himself into something he doesn't belong in?"

Jaune sucked in a breath.

"While I disagreed with turning over the entire security of the Festival to Atlas, I agree the VDF may not be ready to handle things on their own. I'm pushing for a joint security arrangement. I can't comment on the General's state of mind, as I'm not a mind reader."

Lisa pressed, "Would it be possible to acquire his opinion on the matter? Or hold a press conference with him?"

"You'd have to ask him," Jaune said.

Lisa continued, "Follow-up: Atlas and the SDC are almost one and the same to the public eye and their infrastructure. It wouldn't be unfair to assume the SDC can interfere with Atlas's security. Yet, when Menagerie offered assistance to deal with any White Fang threat, both Vale and Atlas declined. Can you guarantee the SDC didn't have a hand in keeping Menagerie's influence away, and that the SDC won't gain an unfair advantage through their Atlas connection?"

"You're the reporter; why don't you handle that?" Jaune said, deflecting. "Lisa, this is about the Festival. That's not my department. I just plan the Festival and set things up."

Lisa smirked. "So I'll put you down for no comment?"

"Yes," Jaune said, firm.

"Thank you very much," Lisa said, sitting.

Pyrrha leaned in, whispering to Jaune, "To be fair, you're one of the few government officials to answer questions straightforwardly, so it's not surprising they come to you with them."

Jaune muttered, "Right…"

Weiss groaned, and Blake, in a rare show of solidarity, patted her shoulder. "I hate my father…"

"We both do," Blake said comfortingly.

A man stood, waving at Lisa. "Can you make it a law for Lisa Lavender to do her newscasts in a bikini again? For the Festival?"

Lisa sputtered, "Excuse me?!"

"You did it once; it was amazing," the man said, grinning.

An older man raised both hands. "I second and third and fourth that, heheh!"

Blake stood, voice sharp. "Your attention, please! Can we get back on track with the Festival?"

The older man nodded. "Right, right… Will there be booth babes?"

"That's up to the preference of the vendors," Jaune said.

"WOOHOO!" the old man cheered.

"You're still not allowed to grope them unless they consent," Jaune added.

"Phooey!" the man grumbled, as a cop nearby gave an I'm watching you gesture.

"I know your porn history, Larry!" the old man shot back.

A girl stood, voice sultry. "Mr. Arc, do you need a date to the Vytal Festival? Because I'm single and willing! I'll also be ovulating at that time, just FYI!"

Jaune's face reddened. "I'm very flattered, but I'll have to decline. Sorry."

"What? Am I not good enough for you?!" the girl shrieked.

Yang leaned in with a grin.

"No! You aren't! I'm his girlfriend!" She shouted. The girl, undeterred, began to reach for her waist.

"I got your face tattooed on my tits! I'LL SHOW YOU!"

Security dogpiled her before she could lift her shirt, dragging her out. Jaune cleared his throat, voice strained. "Well… that's all the time we have for today. Thank you all. See you at the Festival!"

He stumbled backstage, beelining for the dressing room. Pressing his face into the wall, he groaned, voice muffled against the plaster.

Nora bounced in, grinning. "I think that went well!"

Jaune groaned louder.

Weiss, following, snapped, "Of course you would."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Taiyang faces his greatest challenge after Summer left and he got his head back on straight... His girls growing up. Fortunately he has a friend to help him out.

One-Shot, No Romance, Family.

Work Text:
Taiyang Xiao-Long faced the greatest challenge he'd ever been confronted with. Fighting the Queen of the Grimm, losing the love of his life (twice), all of that seemed to pale in comparison to the challenge before him.

Both of his girls-Both of them! They needed him. He had failed once before, but now? He had no more chances. He had to figure this out… He had to be there for them. He couldn't fail. He couldn't!

The Patch General Store was a cramped, fluorescent-lit maze of shelves, its air heavy with the scent of canned goods and cleaning supplies.

Taiyang Xiao Long stood frozen in the feminine products aisle, his broad shoulders hunched, his blond hair disheveled, and his blue eyes wide with a haunted look. His hands hovered over a dizzying array of pads and tampons.

He muttered "Which do I… what do I…?" His frantic whispers were barely audible over the store's tinny radio playing bad covers of ancient top twenty hits.

"Oh! Hello, Tai. Are you all right?" A gentle voice cut through his panic.

Taiyang's head snapped up, relief flooding his face as he spotted a smiling woman, her warm brown eyes crinkling behind round glasses, her greying auburn hair tucked under her Tablebreaker habit. Her small frame radiated calm, her hands clasped over a basket of groceries.

Taiyang twitched and reached out a hand towards her, desperation etched into his face.

"Sister Lucy… please… I need some help."

"With…?"

Lucy's gaze flicked to the shelves, understanding dawning. She looked up, her lips twitching.

"Oh… ohhh. Yang?"

Taiyang's expression grew more haunted, "And Ruby… they both started. At the same time."

Lucy chuckled, her laughter soft but grounding.

"It's all right, Tai. I'll help you."

Taiyang's knees wobbled as relief flooded his entire body.

"Thank you," Taiyang breathed, his shoulders sagging.

"I'll even explain the whole thing to them both," Lucy added, plucking a few packages from the shelf with practiced ease, "Since I've been helping them at Sunday School with other… Womanly concerns."

"Ohhh, thank you, thank you, thank God!" Taiyang groaned, his hands clasping around hers in prayer. Lucy chuckled.

"Easy, easy!" Lucy said, her tone teasing but kind. "Everything is going to be just fine, I promise."

"Thanks," Taiyang said, rubbing his neck. "Qrow and I were at a loss."

Lucy's eyebrow arched, her voice playful.

"What, was he going to hire a hooker to explain it to them?"

Taiyang froze, his eyes darting away.

"…Uh… n-no! Of course not! But, uh, let's get home as quickly as possible, just—just to get things going, right?"

Lucy's smile turned knowing, her tone dry.

"…Qrow said he was going to hire a hooker, didn't he?"

"He didn't say that!" Taiyang protested, his face reddening.

"More just that he strongly implied it?"

"... Maybe."

Lucy sighed, grabbing a final product and looping her arm through Taiyang's, her basket swinging.

"Let's get to your house before your girls are scarred for life, huh? Any more than they already are?"

"Good idea," Taiyang muttered, his voice thick with gratitude as they headed to the checkout.

- - -

They managed to get all the way back to the Xiao Long cabin. The living room was a cozy chaos of scattered mechanical devices and half-finished homework, the scent of pine mingling with the faint tang of pancakes and eggs from breakfast.

Yang, twelve and already fierce, sat cross-armed on the couch, her lilac eyes narrowed in embarrassment, while Ruby, ten and wide-eyed, clutched a stuffed Grimm plushie, her silver eyes darting nervously.

Lucy sat between them, her habit smoothed out, her voice calm and warm as she explained things with the same gentle clarity she used for Sunday sermons at Patch's Tablebreaker chapel.

"It's all natural, girls," Lucy said, holding up a diagram she'd sketched on a napkin, her smile reassuring. "Your bodies are growing, and that's a gift, even if it feels strange now. You're becoming strong women, like your mom and Summer were."

Yang's scowl softened at the mention of Raven, her voice small.

"Mom… didn't stick around for this stuff."

Lucy's hand rested on Yang's shoulder, her touch steady.

"She made her choices, Yang, but you're not her. You're you—brave, loyal, and fierce. And you've got Tai, Qrow, and me to help you through."

Ruby's voice was a whisper, her eyes glistening.

"Mom would've known what to say…"

"She would've," Lucy agreed, her voice soft but firm, pulling Ruby into a gentle hug. "But she'd be proud of you, Ruby, for facing this with your big heart. I'm here to help you both, just like she'd want."

Taiyang hovered in the doorway, his eyes misty as he watched Lucy work her quiet magic, easing his daughters' fears with stories of her own awkward youth and practical tips wrapped in humor. Their tension slowly faded, replaced with little laughs and warm smiles.

Taiyang had not been to church since Summer's death. He'd kept sending Ruby and Yang there, because that was what Summer wanted for them. His own beliefs… He wasn't sure he could believe in a God that could love someone like him, a miserable failure.

Yet… Sister Lucy took time out of her day to help them all out. At no profit to herself. He smiled softly, the weight on his heart lifting a little.

"Now! You two go to the bathroom," Lucy said with a smile. "If you need any help, just ask, but I know you two can handle this like the young ladies you are. And after? We'll go out for ice cream. My treat!"

"And cookies?" Ruby asked. Lucy nodded. Ruby squealed. "YEAH!"

Ruby shot off to the bathroom. Yang followed. She huffed.

"I-I would have figured it out," she said. Lucy nodded.

"I know, but everyone needs help once in a while," she said. Yang smiled gratefully, and turned to head off after her little sister. Taiyang came into the living room, and handed Lucy a cup of tea.

"Thank you," he said, "For everything."

Sister Lucy beamed back.

"It's what I'm here for."

Taiyang sighed heavily.

"I should've called you first."

"You should've," Lucy shot back, her tone teasing but pointed, "instead of joking about hookers."

Taiyang chuckled nervously.

"Oh… Yeah… Joking! That's me…"

Qrow walked in with a big smile.

"Hey kids! I've got someone to tell you all about-Oh. Hey Sister Lucy," Qrow trailed off.

A truly voluptuous black cat Faunus woman entered, her ears twitching happily.. She wore a very revealing white dress with a gold collar and expensive sunglasses. Sunglasses she pulled off dramatically with a big smile.

"Qrow baby, where are your nieces? I'm all ready to go-Oh! Hey Lucy!"

Sister Lucy sighed and waved at the Faunus woman.

"Hey Fuschia. How's it going?" She asked with a friendly smile. "Thank you for the donation to the church fund last Sunday, it was very much appreciated."

Fuschia beamed.

"It was nothing! You've been so kind to me since I moved here! So, where are Qrow-baby's little nieces? I can't wait to teach them about taking care of their-!"

"How about we all just go out for ice cream, huh?" Taiyang said quickly. "I-I mean, before we get into the…" His inner manhood shuddered, "Nitty-gritty?"

Fuschia looked him up and down, and winked.

"Anything for you, baby. I love a responsible man. I'll get the car ready!"

She turned and headed out the door.

Sister Lucy slowly turned and stared at the cringing Taiyang and Qrow.

"I mean… Technically she's not a hooker?" Taiyang said weakly.

"Please! I don't do that… Anymore," the Faunus woman called back through the door. "Now I do movies!"

"See? She does movies," Qrow grinned weakly.

"So I've heard," Lucy deadpanned.

In the end, they went out for ice cream and cookies, Taiyang got Fuschia's number on a card with a lipstick mark on it, Sister Lucy and Qrow won big at the arcade, and Yang and Ruby learned a lot more about women's health than they perhaps wanted to know. But instead of fear, they had confidence, and in the end, that's what the people who loved them wanted them to have more than anything else.

That and common sense, but that's another story.