Sneaking His Way into the Multiverse (RWBY Jaune, WC-lite mechanics)

[supman500]

Maybe you could have used dust vials for the charge blade.

 

[Mashadarof402]

'Slice of life'

*Chapter is mostly Jaune hunting a fecking dragon and a giant mutant T rex*

Im not sure I follow your definition of slice of life.

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What are you talking about? The dragon was living. He sliced it up. And made some good eating of it.

Ergo, a slice of life story.

 

[punster lv1]

To be fair, the slice of life label is not about how action packed a story is but about the importance of an (eventual) overarching plot compared to day to day events. An action series with a monster of the week formula could qualify as a slice of life. (I don't know enough about Monster Hunter's plot to say it does or doesn't.)

Spoiler: a single correction

Blended of Rathalos scales and metal plates lined with the wing membrane

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Blends

 

[KinKrow]

Well, he loved it, and that's what mattered. Blended of Rathalos scales and metal plates lined with the wing membrane, wearing it reduced the roiling heat of the forge to a warm breeze for all of him except the exposed face. He was also quite pleased with how the tests of the defensive properties turned out. A heavy sword blow deflected off his arm with barely a scratch to his Aura, whereas before a bigger chunk would have been lost.

Nobody could say the armor set was subtle, of course. The red and black scales rippled in the light, covering him from head to toe—no footwear, as he requested, but the smiths crafted an outer layer that could be attached to his rocket boots. Sharp spikes were placed in strategic places to enable unarmed strikes. A half-visor hid his eyes. Overall, it combined to lend an aggressive image. This armor was forged for battle, not games.

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Mixing MonHun gear with modern/sci-fi attachments is such a vibe.

Spoiler: Rathalos Noir Corne

 

[BoundlessVortigern]

It was around that point, sitting there snacking on morsels, chatting to the Hunters while listening with half an ear to Escha pestering Tattletale for stories of other worlds, that the thought struck him.

Today was his first true hunt.

No life-threatening ambush that forced him to fight. No complicated mess that he had to untangle. He found news of a monster causing trouble, and gathered a team to chase after it. Bringing it down, he got paid. After a hard day's work, the world became a little safer because of him. It was the life he signed up for.

But what he remembered, what he treasured were the unhurried, lighthearted times. The stroll through the woods, learning of the local fauna and flora. Chatting with Logy and Escha as they climbed a tree that was more akin to a mountain. Taking in the views.

It clashed with the lessons taught at Beacon. There, they pushed the value of speed and expediency, the need to focus on the battle before all else. In time, he would have learned to shut down his thoughts, good or ill, until a Grimm was dead. Nothing mattered but that a Huntsman completed his hunt without delay. The people of Remnant depended on it, each and every day.

Living was for when the job was done.

Here, always, the Hunters lived. Even as they hunted, they lived.

He envied them. Envied that the world did not wish for them to die. That, for all that they struggled, they could exist in harmony with nature. That they laughed because they wanted to, not because they had to. It seemed to him a fairer world.

Perhaps that was why he had let these guys convince him to stay the night.

Pushing a smile to his face, he snatched up a dino drumstick, and took a great big bite of it as he rejoined the revelry, joking with the Hunters and recounting to them tales of his adventures.

Tomorrow was another day. In this moment, as the sun set over Astera, Jaune chose to fool himself for a little while longer.

And dreamt that this was the life he was meant to live.

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...Lazy, are you TRYING to make me cry? Because I am T_T;. I love this chapter, but this section's making me feel sad for our guy with his original place and what went on back there. I can only hope that he can end Salem's threat among other things quickly, especially if he could eventually retire somewhere nice with Tattletale when all of this is done in the far, far future. Escha's going to be a treat to have for the two in their party, especially when she gets to do her thing as a Palico.

 

[Rakdos92]

Mixing MonHun gear with modern/sci-fi attachments is such a vibe.

Spoiler: Rathalos Noir Corne

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Is that fucking Bill Cipher on the ID card?!

 

[KinKrow]

Jax didnt even fuck Coco and Velvet, what a vanilla loser.

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You're so right, lol.

In a fucked way, but yeah.

Is that fucking Bill Cipher on the ID card?!

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I'm pretty sure it's the Rhodes Island logo with a line on top, but I'm not sure.

 

[Lazurman]

Ahhh, all in all, this was a very fun arc. And you have succeeded in making me add MHW to my wishlist, so congrats, author-san.

Though, I would like to draw attention to this bit from the chapter:

But what he remembered, what he treasured were the unhurried, lighthearted times. The stroll through the woods, learning of the local fauna and flora. Chatting with Logy and Escha as they climbed a tree that was more akin to a mountain. Taking in the views.

It clashed with the lessons taught at Beacon. There, they pushed the value of speed and expediency, the need to focus on the battle before all else. In time, he would have learned to shut down his thoughts, good or ill, until a Grimm was dead. Nothing mattered but that a Huntsman completed his hunt without delay. The people of Remnant depended on it, each and every day.

Living was for when the job was done.

Here, always, the Hunters lived. Even as they hunted, they lived.

He envied them. Envied that the world did not wish for them to die. That, for all that they struggled, they could exist in harmony with nature. That they laughed because they wanted to, not because they had to. It seemed to him a fairer world.

Click to shrink...

This sentiment feels at odds with the vibes of RWBY. I could see that kinda thinking pushed at Atlas Academy, given that Atlas (then known as Mantle) peddled an ideology of emotional suppression so as to avoid Grimm a generation back, and likely still has holdouts of that ideology baked in--but I don't see it being taught in Beacon under Ozpin's watch. It's an unhealthy way to live, and it flies in the face of human nature. We can hide our feelings from each other, but that feels like a fool's gambit when fighting wide-range empaths like Grimm.

Instead of 'missionmissionmission, killkillkill,' what I feel would be more appropriate in Beacon's curriculum would be an emphasis on keeping up morale, having your shit together and squared away before you set out on a hunt; to fill your heart with positive memories and associations, to think of your loved ones and enjoy life as it is.

A Huntsman's life is dangerous and full of hardship, yes, but overemphasizing that in training feels counterproductive.

Oh! And on a semi-related tangent, according to the After the Fall novel (pg. 369), the schedule for a 2nd year student is:

7:30am - Breakfast
8:00am - Plant Science, Professor Thumbelina Peach
9:45am - Military Strategy, Prof. Peter Port
11:15am - Weapon Crafting and Upkeep, Prof. Harold Mulberry
12:30pm - Lunch
1:30pm - Stealth and Security, Prof. Ann Greene
2:15pm - Legends of Remnant, Prof. Dr. Bartholomew Oobleck
4:00pm - Combat Training, Prof. Glynda Goodwitch
5:00pm - Sparring, Self-Directed
6:00pm - Dinner

 

[Tohu]

Never expected that their next companion will be a talking walking cat, but it's kinda fun to imagine how people in future worlds will react.

Also Jaune got a cool armor and lance with is super cool. He is the guy with a poncho in one second and fully armored samurai in dragon scales in next. Will Tattletale and Escha get a special drip too?

Isn't funny how the world with giant monster walking around is the one with friendliest people. Other replies were right. World of Monster Hunter really is a slice of life.

Let's count our crew members. One so so huntsman on training with luck that swings like a metronome, one sly smartass with trust issues, one eldritch entity and a furry. A whole team. How we going to call them ?

Tattletale: It's sure great that we have a new adorable member but her appearance will definitely be a problem in some worlds. How could we disguise her?

Jaune: I think I have an idea.
-------------------------------------Later--------------------------------------
Jaune: And this is my other team member Escha.

Escha in coat and fedora: Hey.

 

[KaMinSod]

A Huntsman's life is dangerous and full of hardship, yes, but overemphasizing that in training feels counterproductive.

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We only see a few missions that are Beacon approved, but there's honestly zero time to stop and smell the roses. I think the closest they come to that is the days the two teams spent in mantle / Atlas weirdly enough, where Jaune could escort schoolkids and be cougar bait. Season three Jaune has only had awful 'the city is on fire' missions so far, and the Grimm are never fun to hunt. You also can't take a walk through a remnant forest without coming across the ruins of some civilization or other, or a destroyed frontier town. It's a lot less fun than MH land.

It could just be that way because the show we're watching is the end of the world, pretty much, but RWBY as a whole tends closer to Earth Bet than to MH, as a setting.

 

[Lazurman]

It could just be that way because the show we're watching is the end of the world, pretty much, but RWBY as a whole tends closer to Earth Bet than to MH, as a setting.

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While you do have a point, I can't help but feel that using the protagonists as a bench mark is a bad call. It's like using Harry, Ron, and Hermione as examples of normal Hogwarts student behavior.

 

[TheWoo]

In MH monsters are just creatures living life. RWBY's monsters exist to only actively murder people. It does make sense Hunters from both worlds to have a different mentality about the job.

 

[Agent Orange]

Escha's gonna be hard to explain in a lot of worlds and be totally unassuming in others.

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This. Unless they visit settings like Shrek or Zootopia, Escha will stick out like a sore thumb. Maybe some glamour amulet or something like that is in order?

Let's count our crew members. One so so huntsman on training with luck that swings like a metronome, one sly smartass with trust issues, one eldritch entity and a furry. A whole team. How we going to call them ?

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You forgot the Negotiator i.e. Tattletale's eldritch patron.

 

[LazyAutumnMoon]

Looks like they hit the jackpot with that amount of loot! Unfortunately, they are now going to have to get through the most nerve racking part of adventuring; having to decide what they are going to keep, and what they are going to sell for points.

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Plants grow, bugs breed. They're things that could pay dividends by keeping around.

So, do they have an infinite supply of those items or is it finite? Would suck to run out of things.

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Finite. Some things aren't dead - plants grow, bugs breed. Other things can be substituted - gunlance shell recipe is a guide.

Man, Ruby is going to have a fit when Jaune gets back. Red Rook would definitely get her attention

And it is heartwarming that our Dumb of Ass protagonist gets some friends along for the ride who appreciate him.

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It would! ...When he whacks it across her face... because she's trying to kill him...

How dare you, Sundancer all the way.

But just wanted to say that I really enjoyed this chapter, and I hope they wont lose their monster hunter food gains. I will say though, it kinda seemed that Jaune was getting knocked around a lot by the monsters, despite having withstood blows from Leviathan. I might be misremembering the leviathan fight though.

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Most of Leviathan fight, he's not taking direct hits. And when it got to the end where he did, something was going on there that wasn't happening here.

Maybe you could have used dust vials for the charge blade.

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But they have no dust vials...

...Lazy, are you TRYING to make me cry? Because I am T_T;. I love this chapter, but this section's making me feel sad for our guy with his original place and what went on back there. I can only hope that he can end Salem's threat among other things quickly, especially if he could eventually retire somewhere nice with Tattletale when all of this is done in the far, far future. Escha's going to be a treat to have for the two in their party, especially when she gets to do her thing as a Palico.

Click to shrink...

Happy you liked it!
RWBY and Monster Hunter shares so many similarities, yet the core emotions and tones of them are so different. It's interesting.

Ahhh, all in all, this was a very fun arc. And you have succeeded in making me add MHW to my wishlist, so congrats, author-san.

Though, I would like to draw attention to this bit from the chapter:

This sentiment feels at odds with the vibes of RWBY. I could see that kinda thinking pushed at Atlas Academy, given that Atlas (then known as Mantle) peddled an ideology of emotional suppression so as to avoid Grimm a generation back, and likely still has holdouts of that ideology baked in--but I don't see it being taught in Beacon under Ozpin's watch. It's an unhealthy way to live, and it flies in the face of human nature. We can hide our feelings from each other, but that feels like a fool's gambit when fighting wide-range empaths like Grimm.

Instead of 'missionmissionmission, killkillkill,' what I feel would be more appropriate in Beacon's curriculum would be an emphasis on keeping up morale, having your shit together and squared away before you set out on a hunt; to fill your heart with positive memories and associations, to think of your loved ones and enjoy life as it is.

A Huntsman's life is dangerous and full of hardship, yes, but overemphasizing that in training feels counterproductive.

Oh! And on a semi-related tangent, according to the After the Fall novel (pg. 369), the schedule for a 2nd year student is:

7:30am - Breakfast
8:00am - Plant Science, Professor Thumbelina Peach
9:45am - Military Strategy, Prof. Peter Port
11:15am - Weapon Crafting and Upkeep, Prof. Harold Mulberry
12:30pm - Lunch
1:30pm - Stealth and Security, Prof. Ann Greene
2:15pm - Legends of Remnant, Prof. Dr. Bartholomew Oobleck
4:00pm - Combat Training, Prof. Glynda Goodwitch
5:00pm - Sparring, Self-Directed
6:00pm - Dinner

Click to shrink...

I see it the same way I see team RWBY throwing White Fang off the train without hesitation. The daily life of a Huntsman is one full of little switches in the brain that turns a person into what their job requires, then turn them back to their normal peppy selves afterward so they can go destress after a day's work.

Spoiler: Further thoughts on the subject

Remnant as setting has cracks. Doylist, that's the way the studio built it to facilitate the show. Watsonian, when needing to think of it as a setting that somehow works (for writing a fanfic, for example), an explanation would be that society in Remnant is one not organically grown, but was shaped by those like Oz as a response to the Grimm.

In that light, I see Huntsmen as those carrying a lot of the burden to keep the world at its current equilibrium, and so they face the cracks of how society functions in a way that others won't, leading to coping mechanisms that is out of step with the world around them, a world that is already a step removed from Earth norms. Hence, happy-go-lucky teenagers resorting to violent or lethal options in situations that watchers of the show think could have been handled differently, and other such strange idiosyncrasies.

Positive emotions are great. Maintaining it on an urgent timetable or in high stress situations would be difficult. Easier to teach calmness, meditative trances, etc. and give slack for missions that aren't critical. Morale is for before and after the mission. During it, focus.

 

[Adudefromthesea]

Plants grow, bugs breed. They're things that could pay dividends by keeping around.

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How much space they have in the apartment for that though?

 

[Rakdos92]

Plants grow, bugs breed. They're things that could pay dividends by keeping around.

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Bet you Lisa wishes Taylor was here for that. Making bugs reproduce at an optimal rate would be right up her alley.

 

[Kurogane_Psi-ki]

"Discounting that one that we spent, like, five minutes inside?

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Which world was that? I think it was Raccoon City? And when did they go there?

 

[sul4ic]

Which world was that? I think it was Raccoon City? And when did they go there?

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I think it might have been Pandora, but I don't recall all that well. They were almost immediately attacked after they entered and dipped out quickly. It was right after Dishonored I believe

 

[Learned Knave]

I just wanted to say that it is intensely apropos that Escha attempted to sneak her way into the multiverse, too.

 

[Kurogane_Psi-ki]

I think it might have been Pandora, but I don't recall all that well. They were almost immediately attacked after they entered and dipped out quickly. It was right after Dishonored I believe

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Yeah found it, at the start of the "Jolly Cooperation" chapter. Though what world was that anyway? They dropped in on a barren wasteland called Pandora, got pelted by bullets and left. So it's kind of hard to figure it out.

 

[coalface]

Yeah found it, at the start of the "Jolly Cooperation" chapter. Though what world was that anyway? They dropped in on a barren wasteland called Pandora, got pelted by bullets and left. So it's kind of hard to figure it out.

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Isn't it the game Borderlands?

 

[ra556]

When Jaune meets Rwby and others again in the future and fixes them, will they become friends again, or even establish a relationship?

 

[The Hero named Villain]

WCJaune accidentlys into Everafter before Neo attack

then WCArc ask them if thier mad he killed thier shared boyfriend?

Blake gets triggered over PalicoBlake being so damn nice and adorable

Tats making them all feel like shit , which causes WCJaune and RK to go two v 4 in a fight which causes the PP to get killed.

 

[Heuristic]

Eh, the entire ever-after plot and atlas trip were such garbage that they should be omitted from the setting. Such a waste of potential...

 

[The Hero named Villain]

i like the RK part of Everafter, granted i like Yuji(jjk), Keiwa(kamen rider geats) and Taylor(Worm)

so that just might be a me thing

a thought
JauneWC meets Jess the green lantern on DC Earth, this same jess from the crossover movies

so next time JL meets RWBY they can tell them they met a other Jaune

hmmmm
i wonder which Marvel/Dc milf Jaune would take his v-card

 

[Agent Orange]

i wonder which Marvel/Dc milf Jaune would take his v-card

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*Lisa feeling vaguely annoyed at the notion.*

 

[LazyAutumnMoon]

With a tap, Jaune sent the four mosswines from the apartment. They're in a better place now, off to wherever sold things go.

…Okay, in all honesty, he expected the piggies to end up in a restaurant kitchen somewhere. Not one of the five-star ones, either; they fetched a pretty low price in the Marketplace. Mosswines may be delicious from what the Hunters said, but that probably translated to nothing special in the wider universes, what with food able to grant immortality or give your fist the destructive strength of a ship cannon. It wasn't even rare like wyvern meat, nor as tasty. Selling the lot got him two hundred Points.

To Jaune, it was the cherry on top of a fruitful trip.

New protective armor, an extra weapon to expand his repertoire, a whole host of useful materials that can multiply, and now this? Life was good.

Passing by the dining table, he tossed the Company scroll onto the surface. It landed near Lisa who paid it little attention. The girl was engrossed in her laptop, flipping from one website to another at blistering speed in an attempt to stuff her brain full of knowledge, all in the admirable goal of someday exploiting them to strike it rich.

Lisa did not aspire to be an academic. She aspired to own the academy.

If she didn't die starving first, of course.

Pausing in his steps, he said, "Eat your breakfast, Lisa. It's getting cold."

The reminder snapped her out of her fugue. "Oh, oops." She stabbed at the plate of chicken salad with a fork. "I got to a really interesting part and—wait a second, salads are supposed to be cold." She glared at him.

"And your plate's supposed to be empty. Come on, don't you want more gains?" He flexed his arms as emphasis.

The food that Logy and the others included in their gift was another boon he won't soon forget. Chock-full of nutrients and 'bioenergy,' it practically reshaped Jaune and Lisa after each meal, with the incremental changes stacking up over the course of three days already matching what they'd see after a couple weeks of physical exercise and good dieting. Combine that with the daily training, and Lisa was advancing in leaps and bounds in terms of fitness—she's reached forty push-ups in a row now! Meanwhile, the weight of the gunlance grew lighter in his hand by the day.

Shame that nobody in this apartment ever learned how to prepare a live pig for cooking. The mosswines might have earned themselves a spot here otherwise, and ended up in his stomach instead of someone else's. (He assumed this was the highest aspiration of edible food everywhere.)

Lisa stared at him posing for a good, long while. Then, mumbling half-hearted protests, she pulled the plate closer and got to work devouring the oversized portion. Jaune considered it a victory.

With the uphill job that was turning Lisa into a warrior handled for the moment, he moved on, filling a bucket with water from the sink before navigating through the growing piles of supplies towards the window. The newest member of their team was there, frolicking among the haphazard garden of glass jars that had overtaken the area, each hosting a medicinal plant or mushroom. She held a cup between her paws, and was using it to carefully water the garden.

"Escha, here's some more."

The felyne turned to look up at him, beaming. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome." He placed the bucket next to another that was almost empty, then squatted down to put himself at her height. "Anything I can do to help?"

She nodded. "The bugs need to drink, too. Can you please pour a little bit in the terra… terra…"

"Terrarium?"

"That!"

"Sure thing," he said. Grabbing the near-empty bucket, he scooted over to the insect cage that they repurposed from a blue delivery box. It would have been more than enough for normal bugs, but was a little small for the collection of fist-sized beetles now calling it home, especially after Escha added a bunch of random knick-knacks she pulled from the cabinets to clutter up the terrarium.

Beetles, like people, couldn't just live in a blank room of four walls and a ceiling. Nor could they thrive in this cramped a space.

Still, they had food, shelter, and—he tipped the bucket to soak a corner of the box with moisture—water. Serviceable conditions, if not ideal.

That done, Jaune sat down on the floor, where he began asking Escha for tips on the best ways to take care of the different plants and bugs. Gardening was a hobby right up until it could mix into a potion to save his life; he'd rather the specimens didn't die. And while the cat might have an uncertain grasp on bigger human words, it had no bearing on the fact that she was an expert on a wide range of subjects related to her work as a Palico, horticulture among them. He learned quite a lot by just listening to her.

More than that, he wanted to keep Escha company.

It had hit the felyne in the middle of her first night here, what it meant to be a universe away from home. He had woken up the next morning with a mass of white fur snoozing atop his face.

She's been doing better since then, courtesy of the treasure trove that was the apartment. Everything fascinated her, from the kitchen appliances, to the clothes they wore, to Jaune's scroll and the music on it. By the end of the second day, wonder had won out over homesickness.

Oh, and—

Whirr, whirr, whirr.

Escha's eyes flew wide open. She peeked behind him, head turning to follow the cleaning robot that had once again taken to zooming around the room. They've yet to figure out its schedule, with the robot activating at what seemed like random intervals, but Escha wasn't concerned about that.

The cup she held was handed off to Jaune so that she could drop on all four paws. Slinking past him, she hopped up the nearby couch, padding along the backrest over to the other end. There, she crouched in wait with an intense focus as the unsuspecting robot carried on its business, unaware.

After a few minutes, it passed by her vantage point, well within range. Escha pounced.

The poor robot stood no chance.

Unable to resist, Jaune raised his scroll and snapped a picture of the aftermath. If the device were to ever run out of storage space, it would be because of that ball of fur curled atop the cleaning robot. Checking the picture, and seeing how content Escha looked lying on her favorite perch, he had to smile.

Yes, wonder had won out over homesickness, and their new companion would be okay. Slowly but surely, life settled into a new routine, with three where there were once two.

Which made this a good time to shake things up.

"Escha?"

Pointy ears twitched. The cat poked her head up. "That's me!"

"Ready to go traveling?" he asked.

The happy meow said it all.

-o-


Universe: KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! Location: City of Axel
Event: Emergency Cabbage Harvest​

Axel, a city by the river.

Sensibly surrounded by tall walls to keep the dangers outside, its people lived peaceful lives so far as Jaune could see. With bright-colored roofs and a thousand smiles, this place was, dare he say, idyllic. A wonderful destination for Escha's first foray into the many worlds out there.

"God, we are so in the boonies," Tattletale groaned.

He looked around again, wondering if she had seen something he didn't. They were standing on the corner of a bustling shopping street, with one colorful storefront after the next putting on attention-grabbing displays. Two long lines of carts and carriages traveled on the road, with the pedestrians crisscrossing it as they pleased. "What are you talking about? Sure, it's not what I'd call a city-city, but this is solidly in the upper range of a settlement. Hell, it reminds me of my hometown."

"Yup, the boonies."

"Oi."

Lisa rolled her eyes. "No power lines. No vehicles more advanced than a carriage." She stamped her foot twice on the cobblestone. Her cloak swished with the motion. "No asphalt. We're at least 150 years behind modern times."

When put like that, he supposed she had a point. His home, at least, featured some of the amenities common in Vale, if a little dated in comparison to the capital. Axel resembled one of those old-timey, pre-Great War paintings where all the ladies wore dresses at a picnic.

A girl with silver hair passed by him, and their eyes met. She gave him a wink, continuing on her way.

Well, maybe not dresses.

"I guess it's summer here." Shorts and a crop top? That seemed pretty modern to him. And those pretty eyes…

Tattletale snapped her fingers in front of his face. "Focus! We're not here to mess around."

"Uh, no, we're here to do exactly that," he retorted. "That's the whole goal of this trip, so we could ease Escha into things." Jaune paused. "Although, I gotta say we made a good pick." He waved a hand at the normal, everyday scenes. "The cabbage harvest part was already a clue, but Axel looks even less dangerous than I expected."

"There are people carrying weapons, so it can't be completely safe," Tattletale pointed out.

He nodded in agreement. "True. You know what it reminds me of? Fantasy video games."

"How so?"

He indicated a quartet on the other side of the street. "The ones that are armed tend to move in groups. In teams. That blondie at the front? He's carrying a sword. Guy behind him, sword and shield. Next guy, a bow. The girl bringing up the rear—"

"A staff," she murmured.

"With an orb at the end," he added. "A magic staff. And they're the classic party line-up for going on a quest."

Tattletale was nodding now. "I can sorta see that. It's like one of those tabletop games, and would explain the weird fashion sense."

"Practical, you mean?"

Shorts, crop tops, leather pants, capes, miniskirts, bare-chested with spiky metal shoulder pads. These were just some of the types of clothing that came into popularity due to the advent of Huntsmen and Huntresses in the decades following the Great War. Whether for freedom of movement or hardiness or whatever else, each style had its merits. Presumably, their local analogues sparked the same developments in this world.

"Weird," she insisted. "The clothes don't match this level of civilization. But, anyway, if there's magical goods here, then Axel might hold more promise than we thought. How about this, you go with Escha as planned to harvest cabbages, and I'll investigate."

He cocked an eyebrow. "You're not using this as an excuse to skip menial work, are you?"

"No way," she answered quickly. Suspiciously so.

"Uh-huh. Well, I'm against it, in any case. Today is about helping Escha settle in. She'd want you there." He struck with a low blow.

The confident smirk suggested Tattletale had a ready argument waiting in the wing. A flash of white rushing between the legs of the passing pedestrians stopped her.

Escha appeared from the crowd, back from her carefree jaunt—ahem, her very serious scouting trip of their immediate surroundings. Running on all fours, missing her pouches and armor pieces, she was in her disguised form at the moment. Nobody who took note of the big, long-haired cat would suspect her of being a big, long-haired cat that talks.

She screeched to a halt before them, looking proud with a grilled fish on a skewer clamped between her teeth that she held up for Jaune.

"Hey, hey, look what I got! Want some?"

"Thanks, Escha. Don't mind if I do." Leaning down, he accepted the skewer and bit off a mouthful. "Oh! It's delicious!"

"Isn't it?" gushed the Palico, forgetting that she was supposed to play the part of a cat that did nothing but meow. "I was just in front of the stall to smell the yummy fish, but the fisher lady let me have this one!" The entire time Escha spoke, her gaze had not strayed from the skewer, mouth watering.

As an experiment, Jaune moved the fish to the left. Her eyes went left. He moved it to the right. She followed with rapt attention.

He took a second bite, then passed the skewer down to her. "Want the rest? I'm still full from breakfast."

Escha didn't need much prompting, seizing the fish with both paws—another slipup they would have to work on. After offering it to Tattletale, who shook her head no, she happily dug into the snack.

Above her head, Jaune noticed Tattletale biting her lips in indecision, and he said in a low voice, "Oh, come on. Don't."

"She'd agree to it," was the blithe reply. Or so she tried to play it off as. Tattletale wasn't doing her usual grin.

"It's her first day."

"...I hate you."

"Heh. Don't look so glum. A few hours work will get us paid in local money, and we can go browse the stores. I'll bet they can be convinced to accept gold, too."

The proposal mollified her somewhat, and Jaune rode the momentum to wave down a passerby. The middle-aged man in rough working clothes was wary of them at first, but his face cleared up as he listened to their inquiry on the location of the cabbage harvesting activities.

"You'll be wanting the adventurer's guild. Take a turn at the next intersection, and it'd be near the end of the street. Look for that tower." The man pointed to a tall watchtower covered in—Jaune squinted his eyes—gramophone speakers?

While he would like to get the story behind that design choice, another tidbit took precedence. "Adventurer's guild? Not the farmer's association or something?"

"Oh no, this is best left to that lot. It's too dangerous!"

He looked at the man oddly.

"What?" the man asked.

Reluctant to out their group for what seemed to be common knowledge, he said, "No, it's nothing. Thanks for the help." The moment the man left, he turned to Tattletale. "Something's up with the cabbages. Or that guy."

She shrugged her shoulders. "Maybe they're zombie vegetables. We'll find out the specifics at the guild."

The adventurer's guild (and didn't that just make one feel giddy hearing it? Like a video game!) was a grand building, eye-catching in the peculiar way that government buildings were. Stately, was the word people often used. Big and officious, to intimidate as much as impress.

That perception changed once they walked inside. The main lobby might have conducted very important business in the past, but it looked as if someone had decided that a restaurant made more money, with tables stacked in rows and waitresses moving between them. Despite the morning hours, there were adventurers deep in their cups, or ordering a feast to celebrate completion of a late-night job. A bulletin board drew a good half of the visitors. Occasionally, a team would snatch a slip of paper off of it, before rushing out of the building on their quest.

"It's like the Astera canteen!" Escha squealed.

"Did that cat just talk? Hey, Aqua, cats in this world can talk. Wouldn't that make a cooler pet than your rabbit?"

"Don't be silly, Kazuma. It was probably that girl and you misheard. Also, Sir Bunny D. Fluffy is the strongest member of the party after me. Show him some respect."

"Excuse me!? My Explosion—"

"Ahhhh don't start chanting here!"

The attention their trio garnered lasted only a brief few seconds before it was lost in the general commotion. Adventurers, similar to Hunters, seemed a boisterous lot quick to gravitate towards new entertainment. Jaune capitalized on it to hurry his companions along.

The back wall was taken up by a reception counter, and judging by the forms being signed and clinking coins exchanging hands, the people in uniform stationed there were the guild staff. Deeming it their best bet to gain information, their party joined one of the briskly-moving queues. Soon, they stood in front of an employee.

"Jaune, why did you pick this line?"

"Because it's the closest?"

"Uh-huh. It wasn't because of the pretty lady?"

"Course not."

The wavy-haired employee coughed into a fist to draw their gazes, before giving them a gentle smile. "Welcome to the adventurer's guild. My name is Luna, a guild receptionist. How may I help you today?"

"Good morning~." Tattletale seized the lead, leaning forward to put her elbows on the counter. "We would like to request more information on the cabbage harvest. Do you know if there are still openings available?"

Luna blinked blankly for a moment, before her gaze drifted to something behind the counter. She began to frown.

Tattletale broke the silence, speaking quickly, "Because, you see, my friend and I thought that this was the prime harvest season for it. So I figured, hey, why not check in and maybe pick up a job?" She hesitated a beat, suddenly looking down at her feet, nervous. "I-I wasn't wrong about it, was I? It should be this month. I could have sworn it was. P-Please don't tell me we traveled all this way for nothing!"

Jaune resisted the urge to applaud her act—or maybe gag. If he didn't know any better, he would believe her to be a shy, innocent girl from the countryside in great distress.

The receptionist hurried to reassure her. "Oh no, sweetie, you weren't wrong!" The budding suspicion faded from her face, replaced by a far kinder expression. "My apologies, I was simply astounded by the coincidence. We do indeed have a request to help hunt down the cabbages."

There's the strange connotation again. Hunt down?

"In fact," Luna said with a soft chuckle, "you could not have come at a more opportune time. The guild is preparing to make the announcement within the hour for our adventurers." She caught Jaune's wince. "Am I right in that you two have yet to register as members?"

Tattletale nodded her head, in a surprising move opting for the truth. "We can do that here, can't we? Unless it's too late?"

"Not at all, miss. I can help you with the process. Now, I must note that there is a registration fee of 1,000 Eris for each person."

What currency was 'Eris'? Were they cards like Lien? Paper? Gold?

Tattletale's innocent act didn't work this time despite her doubling down on the 'poor girl traveling a long distance' story. Luna's polite demeanor remained firm, if sympathetic. The fee was a sticking point. An IOU won't cut it.

Jaune interceded, fishing a gold coin from his Pocket that he held out to Tattletale. "Hey, there's this coin we found in the…" His mind raced for a good excuse. "The ruins near our village. Is it worth anything?"

Tattletale beamed at him. She snatched the coin and slapped it on the counter, looking expectantly at the receptionist.

"A coin from the ruins?" Luna reached for it with their permission, holding the coin up to the light—what source powered the light fixtures, Jaune couldn't tell, and he chalked it down to magic. "Hmmm. I don't believe I have ever seen this design. It looks like gold, and an almost comparable size to a ten-thousand Eris coin, but we will have to appraise it to confirm, if that is acceptable?"

"It is," said Jaune.

Luna waved down a coworker, who took the coin before removing to another room. During that time, she chatted with them on the responsibilities of an adventurer—protecting the town and surrounding area, responding to threats, basically everything a Huntsman did—which boded well as it suggested a measure of confidence that they weren't trying to swindle her with the coin.

And they're not. They may be lying through their teeth about everything else, but that coin? 'Tis gold, thank you.

That matched the verdict Luna's coworker gave, upon his return. The purity was a tad lower than the local currency, meaning they got back a small stack of eight coins, each worth 1,000 Eris. Jaune submitted three of the coins to Luna, pocketing the rest.

"Wonderful!" the receptionist exclaimed as she retrieved three rectangular sheets—each was a bit bigger than a person's hand—stored below the counter, passing one to Jaune, one to Tattletale, and one to the person standing next in line. "Then let me be the first to welcome you to the adventurer's guild. These are your adventurer cards. Please fill them out now, then tap the bottom left corner. Once set, a card is linked by magic to its owner, and will be very important in your line of work as it allows you to choose a job class—"

Interrupting, Jaune said, "Hang on a second?" Turning, he plucked the card from the very confused person behind their group, then bent down to pick up Escha and placed her on the counter.

With solemn dignity, Escha accepted her adventurer card.

"Sorry," Jaune said, dipping his head in apology to the receptionist, "but this is our third member, not that guy. Please, go on."

Luna's smile, so kind and gentle this whole time, twitched.

"This is a cat."

Jaune looked at her in blank incomprehension.

"Cats cannot become adventurers," the receptionist explained, enunciating each word slowly and clearly for his benefit. "Leaving aside the sheer absurdity of the idea, for the underlying magic of our adventurer cards to work in the first place, it requires the subject"— *ding!* —"to be sentieeent?"

A long lull ensued, filled with choking noises as the receptionist stared at the completed card held between Escha's paws. It dragged on to the point where Jaune started to worry this was a medical emergency. But then, her expression smoothed out to a picture perfect smile.

"Then let me be the first to welcome you to the adventurer's guild. These are your adventurer cards. Please fill them out now, then tap the bottom left corner. Once set…"

A perturbed Tattletale murmured under her breath, "Why is she repeating herself?"

"I think I broke her," Jaune said.

"...allows you to choose a job class. Note your level located near your p-portrait."

They weren't portraits, really, just silhouettes in the likeness of a card's owner. Escha's card depicted the shape of a cat.

"The level corresponds to the amount of Experience Points, the fragments of the soul which exist in every living thing that you will absorb, whether it comes from foes you kill or creatures you cook and eat. That number is displayed next to your level. As you accumulate Experience Points, you will grow stronger, a phenomenon known as leveling up. This grants you skill points which can be used to learn new skills, depending on your stats."

Soooo, video game logic that was realized through magic. Got it. Wild and unbelievable, but got it.

"Jaune, you're turning red. Are you okay?" Tattletale asked in concern.

"If she's serious and everything is true, defeating monsters can grant us Experience Points."

"Yeah?"

"I killed a Rathalos, a damn dragon, right before I got this card. So it doesn't count."

What was this feeling in his chest, the desire to scream and scream and never stop?

"Oof. Tough luck."

"Um." The receptionist raised a hand. "I don't quite understand, but why not try to look on the bright side? You might have missed out on the Experience Points from a, ah, a 'dragon.' That's one enemy. There are many more foes to slay out in the world. From now on, you will only get stronger."

That… okay, that did make him feel a little better.

Things didn't work out. What's new? Story of his life. If he was going to wallow in regrets, he'd be here all night. The best way to change that was by taking a step forward.

"You know what, you're right." His back straightened. "I just have to think of all the dragons I'm beating up in the future."

Luna giggled. "Yes, 'dragons.' I wholeheartedly wish you luck in the endeavor, but remember to pace yourself, okay? Don't take risks. And before everything else, you should pick a job class. Your many adventures can come after that. Here, allow me to help."

For new members, a box on the right side could be tapped on to generate a list of jobs fitting their parameters. It even included a scroll down function, proving that magic was carrying the technology hard in this world, emulating functions Jaune swore shouldn't have occurred to people yet.

Assisting him, the receptionist analyzed his stats with a practiced eye. "High strength and Vitality, average in dexterity and agility. That would open up most of the warrior branches—I can definitely see it~." She raked her gaze over him. "Although, how strange. You should have enough magic to qualify for the Paladin job but the option isn't here."

His neglect of Outsider worship was probably responsible for that.

"Still, that leaves you with quite a few options. Fighter, barbarian, shieldmaster, huntsman, crossbow—"

He slapped both hands on the counter. "Huntsman."

"A-Are you certain? That job, while it could be taken, benefits the most from agility, with vitality and strength in minor roles."

"Huntsman," he repeated, determined gaze rooting the receptionist in place.

With what looked like an anguished expression on her face, she confirmed the selection. A shaking hand returned his adventurer card to him. He paid it no mind, a fluttering giddiness welling up within him upon reading the new job title emblazoned below his portrait, which now sported a pointy cap decorated with a feather.


Job: Huntsman
Skill Points: 2
Current Skill List
[Sense Rabbit]
[Set Bait Trap]
Available Skills
[Marksmanship]


…Something's wrong.

These weren't the skills associated with heroically killing terrible beasties and saving townsfolk. Why?

The answer, when he asked it aloud, came from Tattletale. There was a Huntsman, and then there was a huntsman. One protected the world from the rising darkness, keeping the ravening hordes of monsters at bay. The other was a man who hunts. Like, for food.

Sighing, Jaune purchased Marksmanship, and stowed the card away in his Pocket. At the very least, he now had improved aim.

Up next was Tattletale.

"You have high intelligence," began Luna.

Tattletale puffed up in pride.

"But middling to low on everything else. Especially magic. I'm sorry, I don't think you can cast spells at all."

"...I didn't want to, anyway…"

It seemed Magical Girl Lisa shall never see the light of day.

Once they moved on to the job list, Jaune peeked over her shoulder to see what options she could pick, as was surprised by the shining border that ringed the entry at the top of the list. It denoted a rare job according to the receptionist, to stoke his envy.


Job: Politician
Current Skill List
[Set Bait Trap (Verbal)]


Tattletale scratched her head. "The heck? No. Why is that even on there?"

It fits you to a tee, Jaune refrained from saying aloud, as they checked the next choice.


Job: Scammer
Current Skill List
[Hidden Smirk]
[Grab Attention]


"Oh, fuck you," she spat venomously at the card. By now, the receptionist was eying her with great suspicion.

In the end, she chose the job of Scholar. It had no combat applications. However, the starting skill claimed to increase her reading speed, with Luna mentioning that future options include better memory retention and delaying sleep to burn the midnight candle for days at a time. Subtle skills that complemented her core strengths.

It just… It didn't wow anybody, which Jaune thought might have been something she was hoping for. More than once, he caught her sneaking looks at his card, comparing it to hers. Having one's capabilities quantified into numbers was turning out to be a sobering experience for the girl. She owned two stats higher than his, intelligence and dexterity, the second one winning by only a couple of points. All in all, she wasn't that special.

He would have to cheer her up in some way later.

It was with trepidation that the receptionist picked up the last adventurer card. All of them put their heads together for that one, the curiosity too strong to ignore.


Job: Cat
Current Skill List
[Feline Battlecry]
[Feline Climbing]


"Seriously?" shouted the receptionist, her composure gone, as the people closest to them craned their neck to catch a peek. Someone gasped.

"Kazuma! Kazuma! If we get an adventurer card for Baron Bunny D. Fluffy, we can level up—"

"We are not helping that apocalyptic murderbeast become even more broken! And you two! Do you think the Adventurer's guild is some kind of joke?"

That seemed to have been directed at their party in particular, so Jaune turned around, as did Tattletale and Escha. The receptionist, meanwhile, had brightened upon seeing someone else voicing the thoughts she could not. Her face quickly fell as she recognized who it was.

The boy there couldn't be any older than Jaune, and unless he had a baby-face, must be younger by a year or two. Dressed in hardy garb suited for the outdoors, he wore a sword on his hip. Arrayed behind him stood a group of girls, his adventuring party at a guess. A witch, a knight, and a drunk.

Though, the knight was fidgeting, and stayed at a remove. Maybe she wasn't part of the team?

"Who are you?" Jaune asked.

"Hmph!" The boy flicked his cape. His voice, a deep baritone, declared, "I am Satou Kazuma, an adventurer. And as your senior, let me give you some advice."

One of his party members, a girl with blue hair and a half-empty wine bottle, piped up, "But Kazuma, we finished our first quest yesterday—"

"Ahhh, don't tell them that!" The panicking Kazuma, voice reverting to a higher pitch, slapped his hands over the girl's mouth. "It counts! It totally counts!"

As the pair struggled back and forth, Jaune leaned down near Tattletale's ear. "What's his problem with us?"

"Oh, it's not much of a mystery." Tattletale flashed her teeth. Less smile, more cat that scented prey. "This insecure boy saw a chance to throw his weight around now that he isn't the newest face around here, and couldn't resist."

The boy, Kazuma, spun back to them. "That's not true!" The red glow to his face said different. "I was just—"

"Jealous?" Tattletale suggested. "Oh ho! Right in one. You've been paying a lot of attention to us. To me?" She struck a pose, cocking her hip. "Hmmmm. Not quite. Why, I'm offended, mister Satou Kazuma."

Kazuma spluttered excuses, but unfortunately for him, Tattletale was having fun.

She tapped her chin with a finger. "I suppose it's more accurate to say you're jealous of Jaune, with me as one of the reasons. I wonder what the others are?" She gave an exaggerated look between Jaune and Kazuma, calling on everyone to wonder.

The suppressed laughter and snorts that soon arose within the crowd suggested that people were reaching the conclusions she wanted them to make.

The difference in stature. The way each boy stood. The face.

For a moment, Kazuma looked like he wanted to cry. That led Jaune to realize that things were getting nasty, fast, and he moved to rein Tattletale back. They didn't need to put anyone down to assert dominance.

But then, the other boy recovered to display a sly grin.

"A man is measured by the company he keeps," declared Kazuma.

Silence.

Then, clamoring.

A wave of murmurs washed over the onlookers as they considered this sentiment. Many found that they agreed with it. The tide began to shift the other way, because people were no longer judging the two boys on their own, but on the quality of their respective adventuring groups. The equipment, the numbers, the human-to-cat ratio. The faces.

The knight raised her hand. "Kazuma, does that mean I am now—"

"Yep," Kazuma said without even glancing at her, so he missed the look of pure joy on the knight's face as she scooted closer, cutting the distance between her and the rest of the party members down to zero.

Oi! Dirty! Recruiting mid-battle to pad the numbers was unfair!

And, yes, it was a battle to Jaune now. Being the better person took a backseat once his pride got dragged into the matter.

"This isn't my full team," he said, thinking of the NPR of JNPR, who definitely counted if they were talking about teammates.

Kazuma made a show of scanning their surroundings. "Oh? Where are they, then?"

"Around." In another universe. Frozen in time. Still counted.

The other boy smirked, conveying all that needed be said. 'Around' was not 'present,' and maybe not 'exists' either. Proof, or get out.

Jaune debated the merits of pulling out his scroll. A photo of him with his team would settle it in a decisive manner. He could just say the device was magic.

Tattletale seized his sleeve the moment his hand twitched towards his pocket. "Jaune, no."

"But he's—"

"No," she insisted. "Look, I think this has really gotten away from us all, and we should calm down. Alright?"

What could he do, in the face of that gentle smile? Taking a deep breath, Jaune released the tension in his shoulders, and with a clearer head, he started to understand how silly he had been to become so riled up. They'd be here a day. Any clout he attained would vanish with tomorrow.

She patted him on the arm. "It's no good to get caught in someone else's pace. Besides, a team isn't about numbers."

"Yeah… wait. I think numbers might be in the literal definition of the word. Like, you need more than one person to make a team."

Kazuma chimed in, "He's got a point."

"Okay, you know what?" Tattletale whirled on Kazuma, the mask of gentleness slipping off her face. "I tried to be diplomatic, but having more people doesn't amount to squat. There, I said it."

"Oh, really?"

"Really," she shot back. "A proper team depends on the effectiveness of its members. Shove a bunch of clueless idiots together, and all you'd have is a mob, right?" She addressed this to the onlookers, sweeping her gaze around the room.

Behind her, Jaune muttered, "Whatever happened to calming down?"

"And don't forget," Kazuma hissed out of the corner of his mouth. "She had a huge part to play in how things ended up here before she tried to sell herself as the peacemaker."

"Making us look bad in comparison."

"How underhanded of her."

Tattletale ignored them. "The point is, it's skill that matters most. Everything else is small stuff if you have good people." She nodded sagely.

That struck a chord with the crowd, and Jaune could get why. As professionals who made a living batting monsters beyond the city walls, they must have learned that very same lesson through experience. There were things out there for which no fancy swords or simple force of numbers can match.

"So you're saying we need to prove our skills?" he said.

Tattletale balked. "What? No. Why would you even think that? I said it to settle your stupid argument."

"I dunno, the man's on to something," said Kazuma. "This does call for a match."

Jaune nodded. "Exactly. And there happens to be a special event today, isn't there?"

"The cabbages have been sighted on the horizon! They're flying straight for us! Everyone, it's time to harvest cabbages!"

The announcement cut through the hubbub, amplified to be heard far and wide beyond the building. In its wake, a cheer erupted from every adventurer except for four.

Jaune, Tattletale, Escha, and Kazuma, who were just plain confused.

"The cabbages are doing what?" Escha asked with her head tilted to the side.

"I knew that cat could talk!"

-o-​

In this world, cabbages fly.

Every year, at the moment they ripened, cabbages would take flight to avoid being eaten, entire fields of the vegetables journeying across the land in a great migration. They attacked anyone and anything that dared to stop them, necessitating evacuations of the townsfolk while the adventurers put on their farmer hats (armor) and farmer tools (big, big swords). As harvest season came, the curtains rose on a glorious battle of eat or be eaten.

And they have eyes, sort of.

Jaune still wasn't sure how he felt about that.

Although, these cabbages were delicious. After he smacked one too hard with his sword and it burst into a bunch of cabbage leaves, he was poking around to find if they had a brain or another creature inside, and that turned into a taste test when the search turned up nothing of note. He has never regretted it since then. Crisp and fresh, the leaf boasted a sweetness that compared to fruits, the tinge of bitterness towards the end adding a counterbalance to complete the experience.

"Twenty-two. Twenty-three. Aaaand, twenty-four!"

He dispelled [Third Arm] and batted the last cabbage into the sack, tightening the string to prevent his harvest from escaping. With so many together, they were reaching the critical mass required to lift him in the air, and the sack floated behind him as he hurried back to the guild's command post for a drop-off. A familiar face greeted him.

"T-Thank you for your contribution!" said Luna, the receptionist. She never quite recovered from their earlier encounter, and Jaune suspected he had a part to play in the empty bottles poorly hidden behind her. "Let's see here. One, two, three… twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two in total."

Say what? Jaune looked down at the trussed-up cabbages. Counting one by one, the number he arrived at was twenty-two, as Luna determined. Quickly, he checked how many heads of cabbages he had hidden in his Pocket. Fifteen additional specimens, stowed away to be absconded with, due to their Experience Point-rich deliciousness. That number had remained the same for a while, meaning he didn't shove some more inside the Pocket by mistake. Was he just bad at math?

"Coming through," said a voice behind him. Kazuma pushed past a second later, a sack over his back and two cabbages tucked under his arm which he offered to Luna. "Can you get these two first?"

As the receptionist did so, the other boy turned to Jaune and stuck out his tongue, while his hand made a strange wiggling motion.

On Jaune's next trip, he discovered the significance of it.

"Steal!"

The word would have been lost in the general commotion, had not for a sudden lull in the cabbage swarm at this part of the field. Jaune turned his head to see Kazuma with a cabbage held in his hands. The other boy had a deer in headlights look as he stared back.

With deliberate slowness, Jaune opened the sack to tally up his harvest.

There were some missing.

"Cheateeer!" Jaune shouted, pointing at Kazuma.

Kazuma avoided his gaze, looking to the side. "I don't know what you're talking about. We never set rules on what skills are and aren't allowed. The only condition is whoever gets the most cabbages, wins." He raised the prize secured in his grasp. "Which will be me."

"That's how it's going to be, huh? I'll make a note of that." The rocket boots might see use, in that case. Screw holding back. "Oh, by the way. Where's your party?"

"Around."

Past him, Jaune saw one of them clear on the other side of the field, running from cabbages whilst crying. Another stood motionless as cabbages took turns outright dive-bombing her from the sky. The last laid flat on her face near Luna, magic spent after letting loose a giant explosion which wiped out a bunch of random monsters that tried to poach the harvest, and made Jaune fear for his life.

"Ha. So much for your vaunted team, 'Satou Kazuma the senior adventurer.'"

"You're alone, too! Where's your team, you blonde bastard?"

"It's Jaune Arc. And they're hard at work, same as me. Because we all contribute to the success of the party, and—"

"Not working together."

"—not working toge-ack!" That was close. He almost fell for the masterful manipulation! "I mean, the situation doesn't require us to be in one place. We stationed ourselves where we each would do the most good."

"Jaune, Jaune, heeeelp!"

They turned in the direction of the cry. A small sack, presumably filled with cabbages, drifted along a few yards off the ground. A fluffy mass of white fur dangled from it, front paws gripping tight and little feet wiggling to no avail.

Below her, Tattletale hopped up and down, too short to reach the felyne.

"...We're working out a few kinks."

"Glad I'm not the only one," Kazuma whispered to himself, not quiet enough. Before Jaune could hurry off to rescue Escha, the other boy stretched out his hand. "Steal."

A cabbage appeared, and without it adding to the buoyancy alongside its brethren, the sack started to lower, soon putting Escha back on solid ground. She looked their way, and waved her arms while shouting her thanks.

Kazuma noticed Jaune's glance. "What?"

"That's such a broken skill." Jaune cracked a grin. "But thanks for the help."

The other boy shrugged. "I like cats," he said simply.

"Funny. Same here." He cocked his head. "Then again, I like most kinds of animals. The only ones I can't deal with are rabbits."/"Rabbits."

By heretofore unknown instincts, they fist-bumped. Because fuck rabbits.

" So you're going to give that cabbage back, right?" Jaune asked.

Kazuma responded by scooting away a step. Jaune followed suit, putting them side by side again.

"Right?" He repeated.

"This is a finder's fee."

"It's theft. You literally said 'steal' as you stole it."

They grappled for the vegetable. Jaune's strength won out, earning him a cabbage that he stored in his bag. Afterward, they both returned to the conversation, as if nothing happened.

Kazuma said, "Why do you hate rabbits, anyway?"

"I was ambushed by one that tried to tear my throat out," Jaune revealed.

"What a coincidence. Me too, except it's been almost every day."

"Does this place have an infestation of killer rabbits or something? Asking for a friend."

Kazuma shook his head. "Just the one, owned by my useless party member. She said she bought it off a glowy screen in a pub bathroom stall that wasn't there the next morning."

"That sounds…"

"I know. She was definitely drunk. But the murderbeast is here now, and for weeks it's been trying to escape and kill everyone, including her. So far, nobody believes me when I warn them about it. I'm the Boy Who Cried Rabbit."

"Hey, quick question. Which party member is it, the one with the rabbit?" Jaune asked while pressing a hand to his temple.

"She has long blue hair, with this weird-looking loop at the top. Her name's Aqua, and she—"

Jaune cut him off. "How big is the rabbit?"

"Normal size? Why?"

"It'd fit in a cage about this big, then?" He mimed the dimensions.

"Yeeees?"

"I guess that explains why my [Sense Rabbit] skill is pinging like crazy."

Kazuma looked where Jaune directed, and spotted his teammate running towards him. He began to hyperventilate. Wide, bulging eyes filled with terror zoomed in on the pet cage she was holding.

"No. Nononono. Not now."

"Kazuma!" the girl shouted. "Kazuma, I have an amazing idea!"

The boy waved his arms wildly. "Aqua! Listen to me carefully! Put that cage on the ground!"

Her eyes lit up. "I knew you'd get it!" To Kazuma's relief, Aqua stopped and followed his order to set the cage down. "Rabbits are the natural predators of cabbages, aren't they? Viscount Bunny D. Fluffy will have these stupid things running scared in no time!" She then unhooked the latch keeping the door shut.

"Did I say to let it out!?" Kazuma wailed.

From the depths of the cage, it crawled. One furry limb extended out of the darkness, the other following soon after. The head came next. A twitching nose snuffled, as if scenting blood in the air. Long ears flopped, menacingly. With a mighty hop, the foul beast leapt a full body's length to escape its prison, landing on the grass, a spot of white amidst the green.

The rabbit looked at them—at him. In those eyes, the vicious streak was clear for all to see.

And that's when Jaune knew.

"No. No, it can't be! I defeated you! You're supposed to be gone forever!"

Yet the Beast of Caerbannog was here. Here, all along.

"Welp, it's loose. We are all going to die," Kazuma said in a matter-of-fact tone.

It was that, the resignation, which awoke Jaune from his stupor. Gritting his teeth, he banished the terror in his heart to a small, distant corner, and strode forward.

"Not if I have something to say about it," he declared, surer than he had ever been.

From one moment to the next, Jaune stood bedecked in a suit of blazing red armor. One hand held a shield that could ward off the fires of wyverns. The other wielded a formidable gunlance to slay the greatest monsters in the land. His boots left scorch marks with each step.

He wasn't the same person he was back then.

"Kazuma, run. I'll deal with this beast."

Beneath a cabbage-dotted sky, man and rabbit dueled once more for their lives.

-o-​

As the portal closed, Lisa arched to stretch her body, making a long, satisfied groan with her arms reaching for the ceiling. Escha, following on her heels, copied the motion.

"Man, that was more fun than I thought!" the girl said. "Who knew an honest day's work could be so exciting?"

Jaune, back slumped, marched by her. "Oh, I'm sure it was fun for you. You didn't have to face this little fellow here." He plonked the cage down on the table. It didn't stay still, but rattled violently. A gesture of his hand, and a box materialized next to it, filled with odds and ends that they bought in Axel—a couple flasks of healing potions, an enchanted set of pillows that stays cool all through the night, dumb bells heavier than they looked, and such like. Magical goods in Axel were just too expensive to get anything with oomph. On the other side of the cage, another gesture summoned a pile of stolen cabbages.

Universe: KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! Location: City of Axel
Event: Emergency Cabbage Harvest
Loot: Cabbages! (x26), adventurer cards, Evercool Pillow, healing potions (x2), exercise equipment, daily goods, food ingredients, Beast of Caerbannog (Earl Bunny D. Fluffy)​

Dropping into a chair, he fished out the Company scroll, opening it to the inventory screen. A swipe down landed him on an entry he never thought to see again. And with a tap of his finger, there hopefully won't be a third time. The cage stopped moving.

Now that the rabbit was a long ways off and couldn't hurt her, Lisa skipped over to the table, plucking a few cabbage leaves to munch on. She shared them with Escha. "It went a lot better this round, right? Should have been no sweat… Mmmm, this is so gooood!" She held her cheek, humming in enjoyment.

No arguments there. The cabbages counted among the grand prizes they obtained from the trip. His [Sense Rabbit] pinged right up until he sold the bunny, which was proof enough that the adventurer cards were still active on this side of the portal.

That meant they could level up. And what do you know, the cabbages contained a bunch of Experience Points in their leafy deliciousness.

Sure, his Huntsman job didn't wow. For now, that was. Maybe in the future, it will wow. They shall find out.

"Have we had a world this easy?" Lisa continued. "Heck, I still don't feel tired yet. We should go for another one to hit a new record. Two worlds in one day."

Drawn by her energetic mood, he made a show of navigating to the portal app. "Well, since you're so gung-ho for it…"

"Ah no, no, no!" she jokingly cried, leaning around Escha to make half-hearted attempts at snatching away the scroll, with Jaune holding her back with his longer arm.

But then, he happened to catch what was written on the screen.

A portal swirled to life on the wall.

"Jaune! What the fuck?"

Thumb pressed to the screen, he turned to her, "I… Sorry, Lisa, but I had to. This world, it's… it's there."

Lisa grabbed the scroll. This time, he let her; it was no time for jokes. Springing up from his seat, Jaune rushed around the room, tossing supplies into his Pocket. In twenty seconds flat, he was standing in front of the portal.

"Wait. Jaune, wait."

"What's there to wait for? Lisa, we have to go!"

The scene on the other side started to come into focus. Brick walls. Strewn trash. A dark alleyway. The scent of salt in the air.

"Because this can't be right! What's written here, it's already—"

The portal flared to signal that the process had completed.

What lay beyond was a city by the sea. Perhaps it was only appropriate for there to be a light rain.

Hello again, Brockton Bay.

Universe: Worm. Location: Brockton Bay.
Event: ABB Bombings.


-o-​

The girl with silver hair appeared in a place she did not recognize.

"Whoa… Where am I?"

A young man with dark eyes answered her. No one could say since when he was there.

"Welcome to the theater. Are you here for the show?"

"Theater? No, um, I wanted to poke my head through the portal thingy for a second. I-I just thought those three were interesting, I didn't mean to sneak in, ahaha."

The girl scratched her cheek, right above a faint scar.

The young man did not seem put out by the admission.

"My, you would fit right in, then. The world can wait, don't you think? Stay a while, mister…"

"Ahaha… my name is Eris, but I go by Chris in this form… and I'm actually a girl."

---

Author's Notes: I figured, the cat didn't deserve what Jaune got.

Although, the cat still got what Jaune got.

.
An artist on Tumblr made cover art for this story on a whim. Unfortunately, I don't have an account there, so in the hope that they read this, I'll ask here.
Jauneglazer, do you mind if I display your work as the cover for this story?

.
Making edits to this tomorrow. If you spy a typo before then, let me know?

Then gonna go write Yakuza Arc for a bit.

 

[Chynya]

Holy fuck, been a while since I've read Worm but this is before Leviathan attack right? World is not ready for 2 Tattletale. That is too much smugness for one world to contain.

 

[Ethercos]

Did I see the words YAKUZA ARC?! Please please please let them meet the bestest boy Ichiban Kasuga my beloved

 

[SebazuD]

An artist on Tumblr made cover art for this story on a whim. Unfortunately, I don't have an account there, so in the hope that they read this, I'll ask here.
Jauneglazer, do you mind if I display your work as the cover for this story?

Click to shrink...

Is it this one?

Post by @jauneglazer · 1 video

💬 1 🔁 9 ❤️ 103 · Decided to create a cover for this story.

www.tumblr.com