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I like where this is going, and I dig the balance changes. Can't wait to see more.
Wish this didn't go the befriend Taylor route. Nice to see more of it though.
"A joke shouldn't have a kill count," I pointed out. "Hamon can't fix roadkill, so I don't think I feel like charging out on my own and getting run over by some white trash bitch on the [Mean Machine]."
This is a great start to go with a pretty realistic person being scared shitless of the deathworld known as Bet.
That may be considered cliche, but it is hard to use other characters well when almost the entire story was from her (biased) point of view.
I don't like the Nerf. It makes sense, somewhat, for Taylor to be able to sense Harvest because they're little bug dudes, but I don't think she should be able to see Stands normally.
There are a lot more bullshit powers out there in Worm than invisible, invincible ghosts with powers of their own. Especially when said ghosts can't be in two places at one time.
Working around someone's power is part of JoJo AND Worm.
Liking where this is going! I wonder what the rules are here though, since apparently people in public can't see the true form of Stand By Me, but Taylor can see Harvest. Do Parahumans count as Stand Users, in a way?
...so the stand that is custom made for killing is not satisfied being used for anything else? That's not a limitation.If and when it does appear, there'll probably be a mitigating factor to it, most likely it being one of the Stands that has traces of its own will; in this case, it's a very violent and bloodthirsty Stand that strains against being used for nonlethal purposes.
Honestly the whole parahumans seeing stands thing is kinda neat, and not that huge a deal concidering how being able to see stands never means that you are safe from stands. I just hope you don't nerf the actual power of the high teir stands later on though, that would be pretty goddamn dissapointing and unnecessary.I keep worrying about whether or not I'm nerfing the Stand too much or not nerfing it enough to tell the story I want to. I was also kind of worried about the reaction to the SI essentially one-shotting Taylor and was all ready to start explaining the mitigating circumstances and such.
...so the stand that is custom made for killing is not satisfied being used for anything else? That's not a limitation.
Personally, if it was about balance I would go with individual stands draining the user in different rates (like a stamina bar) and having to train each of them individually in order to bring said 'cost' down. Maybe add a small/medium/large cooldown or drain each time he changes a stand, also trainable. That way he has potential for absurd bullshit but doesn't allow him to pull counter after counter. Want to be Eidolon Plus? Hope you are ready to train like hell in order to git gud scrub.
Didn't it already say in the first chapter that stronger Stands drain him faster than weaker ones and that it slowly gets easier to do with only the ones he uses?
Honestly the whole para humans seeing stands thing is kinda neat, and not that huge a deal concidering how being able to see sstands never means that you are safe from stands. I just hope you don't nerf the actual power of the high teir stands later on though, that would be pretty goddamn dissapointing and unnecessary.
Talking about powers though, will the mc be able to teach Hamon? I feel like that could be pretty cool naratively. On a more unrelated side note, I hope we get a interlude with the POV of some other character being baffled at the Posing of the MC.
As for the second thing, don't worry too much about it. As long as you present reasonably clear cause and effect in story (or reasonably believable bullshit) people will get it for the most part. Also Harvest is actually a really powerful stand from a strategy perspective, though not as outright offensively powerful as Bad Company.
*New Vegas flashbacks intensifying*Emperor: Big Iron – The name comes from the Marty Robbins song "Big Iron"
You are having way too much fun with this, aren't you?Incidentally, here's all the names I will/would use for Part III Stands manifested through Stand By Me and the musical stuff that inspires them. Credit where it's due, the vast majority of these were thought up by people on the internet in threads asking this exact question.
"biiig iron on his hiiiipppp"
It is a good song, and Moorcock is awesome(he also wrote the song's lyrics, and the lyrics of Veteran of the Psychic Wars, and Great Sun Jester. He also was technically a member of Hawkwind at one point writing two albums for them*.) , and man am I happy that someone else thinks that if Stardust Crusaders had done the "Stand names as musical references" thing that later parts do, that Anubis would have been named Black Blade.Anubis: Black Blade – The name comes from the Blue Öyster Cult song "Black Blade" in the album Cultösaurus Erectus, and is a reference to Stormbringer, the malevolent living sword of the Elric Saga of fantasy novels written by Michael Moorcock (which I'm a big fan of, incidentally).
A Stand is invulnerable to any harm except against another Stand. It usually means that the only person capable of defeating a Stand User is another Stand user.
Stands possess intangibility. It is uncommon but not unheard of for Stand Users to channel their Stands inside their bodies to protect themselves, using their Stand's superhuman durability to their advantage. It is even more uncommon for Stands to phase through objects, but the possibility exists.
As psychic projections, Users can also communicate through their Stands. Barring rare exceptions, a Stand User typically shares their consciousness with their Stand and is able to see through its eyes. Moreover, a Stand User can also speak through their Stand, enabling a form of distant communication. However, the Stand must have a mouth or otherwise be able to speak to do so.
Users possess the ability to shrink their Stands to a microscopic level, but the one time it was shown, Polnareff indicated that it was difficult to manipulate the Stand at such a subtle level, and that it was taxing to maintain the small size, making that property impractical in most cases.
There is a reason cyoa stories can honestly justify choosing power manipulator, Worm is that freaking dangerous without sufficient power to back you up.
I wonder if there'll be stands from Steel Ball Run too? Mostly I just want someone shitting their pants when confronted with Scary Monsters, because 'Suddenly Raptors' has gotta be scary for most capes regardless of power level.
It is a good song, and Moorcock is awesome(he also wrote the song's lyrics, and the lyrics of Veteran of the Psychic Wars, and Great Sun Jester. He also was technically a member of Hawkwind at one point writing two albums for them*.) , and man am I happy that someone else thinks that if Stardust Crusaders had done the "Stand names as musical references" thing that later parts do, that Anubis would have been named Black Blade.
*The Warrior At The Edge of Time, and The Chronicle of the Black Sword.
I have this feeling that my luck is none too good
This sword here at my side don't act the way it should
Keeps calling me its master, but I feel like its slave
Hauling me faster and faster to an early early grave
I'm told it's my duty to fight against the Law
That wizardry's my trade and I was born to wad through gore
I just want to be a lover, not a red eyed screaming ghoul
I wish it picked another to be its killing tool
Black Blade! Black Blade!
Forged a billion years ago
Black Blade! Black Blade!
Killing so its power can grow(grow, grow, grow, grow...)
It's death from the beginning to the end of time
And I'm the cosmic champion and I hold a mystic sign
And the whole world's dying and the burden's mine
And the black sword keeps on killing 'til the end of time
Black Blade! Black Blade!
Bringing Chaos to the world we know
Black Blade! Black Blade!
And it's using me to kill my friends
Black Blade! Black Blade!
Getting stronger so the world will end
Black Blade! Black Blade!
Forcing my mind to bend and bend
I am the Black Blade
Forged a million billion years ago
My cosmic soul it goes on for eternity
Carving out destiny
Bringing in the Lords of Chaos
Bringing up the Beasts of Hades
Laying waste to knights and ladies
My master is my slave
Ha ha ah ha ah ha!
You poor fucking humans
But I thought that Stands were unable to be injured except with other Stand users due to what the wikia states.
Incidentally, I'm blown away by how much positive feedback this is getting. Being honest, I only put this up on this particular subforum because I had the impression that it didn't get as much traffic as, say, SB or SV, and that if this turned out to be a steaming turd I'd at least be sure that not many people would see it.
As you might imagine, the sheer amount of people saying it had promise and giving it likes was not remotely something I expected; in fact, the OP has probably gotten more likes than anything I've ever done (except maybe one or two chapters of my old RWBY quest "ROYL," but I'd have to check on that). It's an amazing feeling, and it kinda makes me want to take this elsewhere... Kinda. Worm is one of those fandoms in particular that seems kind of intimidating to try to write for and just throw your stuff out there. But maybe I'm just being irrational.
Either way, huge thanks for reading and enjoying this so far, and let's hope I can keep it going for once!
Honestly I think a big part of the appeal besides your writing is the fact that the power just comes out of left field for people in worm I mean a projection based trump power isn't one I think people on Bet have ever seen before besides the fairie Queen , plus I can't wait for the interlude chapter
on a side note please tell me you're gonna have some original stands for [Stand by Me] to use cause honestly [Great Sun Jester] is too good a name not to use
This also works with Part 7 since Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap could be considered the Change Channel button. No idea what the final boss Stand of Part 8 will be though.It's funny, really; the Big Bad Stands of Parts 3-6 can be compared to a button on a TV remote: The World is the Stop button, Killer Queen: Bites the Dust is a Rewind Chapter button, King Crimson is a Skip Chapter button, and Made In Heaven is the Fast Forward button. In that vein, Stand By Me might be considered the Eject button, which lets you remove whatever was in there and replace it. Or perhaps the Play button, since it just plays whatever is "loaded into" it.
honestly I think Number 2 would be the best option and I'm not just saying that cause [The Wanderer] is one of my favorite old school songs.So in this next chapter (the interludes getting moved up a space, BTW; it wasn't quite working where it was), the SI is going to actually give a name. I'd rather not give my actual full name for obvious reasons, so I've got a few options as for how to deal with that and would like to ask your opinions (without doing a poll, because I don't know how to get rid of those):
1. Give the SI a normal-sounding name that wouldn't be out of place in Worm and has no relation to my own.
2. Give the SI a name that is a musical reference but can still pass for a normal person's name. In this case, the most likely would be Dion Belmont, after the vocal group Dion & the Belmonts, who were named after frontman Dion DiMucci and Belmont Avenue in the Bronx, where all of the founding members lived on or near. Incidentally, "Dion" is a diminutive of Dionysios and other Greek names with the naming element "dios," which means "of Zeus;" Belmont is a French/English version of the Italian/Spanish Belmonte, which means "beautiful mountain."
3. Give the SI a certain birthmark that recalls a significant one from JJBA, leading them to use a pseudonym related to that. And no, it's not the Joestar birthmark. There's self-indulgence and then there's that.
4. Of my three names, two of them are similar enough to names used by members of the Zeppeli family (even though I'm not Italian) that I'm tempted to just roll with that and have the SI take the pseudonym Marco (similar to Mario and a very common Italian name that doesn't call to mind a chubby plumber) Antonio (Will and Caesar's middle names, only in actual Italian form) Zeppeli. I mean, since there are no Joestars around, surely the Zeppeli Curse will never manfiest itself?
In the latter two cases, I might just handwave it away as the SI losing the memory of their name along with their metaknowledge of Worm (in which case there'll start being grounds for a case that the SI was on the wrong side of [California King Bed] before getting dumped in Earth Bet), or have the SI take a pseudonym either to disassociate himself from the things he doesn't like about himself and which aren't helpful to his chosen course of action (which always struck me as a part of the reason superheroes use "cape names" at all, really) or just make him keep the dislike of my own name I had for a long time but eventually got over.
Well, I've no idea what your actual name is, but how about this: Joel Johnston?So in this next chapter (the interludes getting moved up a space, BTW; it wasn't quite working where it was), the SI is going to actually give a name. I'd rather not give my actual full name for obvious reasons, so I've got a few options as for how to deal with that and would like to ask your opinions (without doing a poll, because I don't know how to get rid of those):
1. Give the SI a normal-sounding name that wouldn't be out of place in Worm and has no relation to my own.
The Belmonts are a family of vampire hunters in the Castlevania series, so that's a double reference towards Dio.
The Belmonts are a family of vampire hunters in the Castlevania series, so that's a double reference towards Dio.
Can you combine 2 & 3 and have him called Dion Belmont with this on the small of his back:2. Give the SI a name that is a musical reference but can still pass for a normal person's name. In this case, the most likely would be Dion Belmont, after the vocal group Dion & the Belmonts, who were named after frontman Dion DiMucci and Belmont Avenue in the Bronx, where all of the founding members lived on or near. Incidentally, "Dion" is a diminutive of Dionysios and other Greek names with the naming element "dios," which means "of Zeus;" Belmont is a French/English version of the Italian/Spanish Belmonte, which means "beautiful mountain."
3. Give the SI a certain birthmark that recalls a significant one from JJBA, leading them to use a pseudonym related to that. And no, it's not the Joestar birthmark. There's self-indulgence and then there's that.