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The Earth Burned (Dropped due to lack of time)

macdjord said:
Interitio: Cal's part really needs another editing pass. In particular, there are a number of places where you seem to have gotten confused between Alex's style of non-dialogue speech and normal dialogue, so you have Cal speaking with quotation marks, but the text inside is written in the 3rd-person past tense:

That should be "So, say there's a house fire, do you respond?"
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Yep. Really do need to work on that. I feel I haven't given Cal the sort of introduction he deserves, but I simply won't have the time to do much more today. Thanks for picking up on that.
 
[X] Jurric

I noticed that in Cal's part you use aesthetic instead of anesthetic on two occasions IIRC
Interitio said:
Nightroman I chatted with in the car, he had a strengh invulnerability package, booring, but useful. He was the team leader, and seemed quite genial and good natured. His powerset was in odd contrast to a skinny physique.
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boring
 
[X] Jurric
Fel seems to limited to me.
 
Interitio said:
My name is Cal. I've been looking for a villain to fight for seven years, eight months and eleven days, because once I'd found one, I could move on to trying to do something that would actually matter.
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So, if I am reading this correctly Cal wants to be a crosser?
 
[] Jurric
I actually prefer Cal, but nobody else voted for him thus far. I do like all 3 so I am fine with whichever wins
 
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mrttao said:
So, if I am reading this correctly Cal wants to be a crosser?
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Crosser, Villain, Beastman, he doesn't care. He just doesn't want to be ineffectual.

Edit: Yes, Macdjord puts it well.

mrttao said:
I actually prefer Cal, but nobody else voted for him thus far. I do like all 3 so I am fine with whichever wins
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Not that many votes yet, and still two days to go on voting, you could try and start a trend.
 
changing my vote
[] Cal

alright, lets make it happen
 
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[X] Cal

Having a goal from the start helps, I guess.
 
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[X] Fel
 
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I like Cal's status as being prophesied to kick Fate inna balls. Does he want to be a Crosser or a Beastman, by the way?
 
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