Mr Zoat
Dedicated ragequitter
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2016
- Messages
- 15,985
- Likes received
- 818,453
10th December 2282
06:25 GMT -6
"kEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYAH!"
Breathe, breathe…
The forced evolutionary virus is great, but it doesn't mean that I can get away with sprinting indefinitely and it definitely doesn't make anaerobic respiration efficient.
**Tanya, I don't like to be a nag, but-.**
**We're just about ready! But… The queen's come with me. I think she thinks I'm a new queen or something.**
**Is that important?**
I take a half-second to glance back at the flock. Definitely closer, but they seem to have decided that they're better served by letting me tire myself out rather than diving down as fast as they can.
**I don't know. I don't know these ants. Some types can have nests with multiple queens but with others the new queens take half the workers and soldiers and leave to start their own nest. I've never seen a situation where the old queen chooses to hang out with a new queen.**
I look around at the cliff sides surrounding me and spot the small tunnel entrances that show that this is ant territory. That might explain why the banshees are hanging back. I didn't think they were intelligent enough for something like that, but… Maybe?
**I'm sure that entomologists of the future will thank you for your work. I'm bringing the banshees to you.**
**Not to me! They didn't even give me a gun and I lost my ripper trying to fight off that giant robot! All I've got is a tiny knife!**
**I'm bringing the banshees to your ambush point, and I'm finding the ambush point by homing in on you. If you're too far away then I won't find it.**
**Okay. There's an old semi-collapsed tunnel. I'm in some sort of maintenance tunnel near that, and the ants are poised to swarm in.**
**Anything I need to worry-**
The sand to my left erupts with angry ant, and I have to use telekinesis to dodge a blob of something that makes the sand hiss when it lands.
**-about, like burrowed ants?**
**Most of the workers have pulled back, but leaving soldier ants as sentries-**
**I just ran past one.**
**-and oh. Okay, it's probably emitting a warning pheromone, so the other ants will be on guard.**
**How do ants sense their targets?**
**Vision and smell. Ah, depending on how close you were, you probably got covered in the warning pheromone, so you can't just outrun it.**
**Not a problem.**
I can just about hear the warrior ant chasing after me, maintaining a surprisingly quick pace even if it can't quite keep up with me. And of course it can't smell the banshees at all from down here, but it's probably continuing to emit that warning pheromone as long as it chases me. So while I could telepathically muffle its senses, I don't. I let it keep-.
What's that?
I jink left and slow, turning and heading towards the opposite canyon wall. A small chance that the banshees will use this opportunity to dive, but I think I've got time and I… Yes, there it is. I grab a small device that was dropped near the canyon wall before turning back to my original course and accelerating again. The ant isn't quite as agile as me and has to actually stop to change direction. So I haven't lost my lead but…
What is this?
It looks a little like a speaker, and there's a radio receiver built into it. Did Doki plant these so that she could communicate with the contestants? I… Think I can… Hear some sort of… Quiet noise? Static? Getting any kind of signal in a canyon isn't easy, as even long wave would struggle to get down here. Don't know. I put it in one of my robe's pockets of later analysis.
And I turn the corner-
Buried ant! Dodge!
-and I see the unfinished section of pre-War road leading to a porous pile of rubble which forms the shape of an amphitheatre. And this time I use my telekinetic sense to feel-. Ants. Lots of them. But that passage over there feels more like a complete utility tunnel of the sort I've seen in dozens of pre-War subterranean structures.
And the entrance…
**Can you open the door?**
**Not without squeezing past two royal guard ants while smelling like someone they're supposed to guard with their lives.**
**Right.** I feel more ants buried in the ground nearby, and the ones in the rocks are preparing to attack as they smell the danger pheromone on me. So I slow to a halt, turn and aim my pistol at the flock just above the canyon rim. **Drawing the banshees in now.**
I fire and miss, the range being too long for the relatively slow bolt of plasma to be at all accurate. I fire and miss again, but they're getting the idea that I'm an actual threat they need to deal with rather than something they can wait to die of dehydration. About half swoop into the canyon in my direction while the rest begin flapping to get over my head.
**My control of these ants isn't precise. If they decide to go-.**
**Understood. Apropos of nothing, would you like ant control psychic powers?**
**Uh, what? You mean-. You can control ants? If you can-? Why am I here?**
**Specialisation. I can talk to you and do other things but I'm not good at controlling animals.**
**Ah… I don't know. That was a… My parents got killed by giant ants, and then I… I got convinced that ants were some sort of amazing super species. I don't think making ants my whole life again would be a good idea.**
Fair enough.
**I do know a guy, though.**
**Oh?**
**Yeah. After I… Had some sense talked into me by this… Really hot guy, I ended up meeting this ant researcher who was trying to make ants less dangerous by making them smaller-**
**Oh? That sounds-.**
**-by injecting their eggs with some kinda virus. He ended up giving them the ability to breathe fire.**
**Maybe not, then. I'd rather have someone who knows that giant mutant ants aren't the solution to all of life's problems than someone who thinks: 'giant mutant ants: dangerous, but could they be more dangerous?'.**
**I think he only killed that town by accident…**
…
I might need to send more people to Washington before too long.
"kEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYAH!"
Here we go! Banshees flying along the canyon are approaching slowly in order to use their screech, while two of those above me are tucking their wings in to swoop! I start running towards the centre of the amphitheatre, firing half-aimed shots at the banshees above me. An ant unburies itself to my right and another sticks its head out through a hole, but I dash past them in a blur before their acid sprays can hit me.
"kEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYAH!"
The ants behind me shudder, turning their attention to-. The low-flying flock has increased their speed, and I can feel the increased aggression from them. Not sure what's doing that-.
**The ants are going crazy! Whatever you're doing-**
I reach into my robes, trigger my Stealth Boy and dash over to a nearby overhang.
**-you better-.**
Banshees jostle for position, sonic energy able to detect me perfectly well. The ants on the other hand…
**Let them attack.**
And then the carnage begins.
06:25 GMT -6
"kEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYAH!"
Breathe, breathe…
The forced evolutionary virus is great, but it doesn't mean that I can get away with sprinting indefinitely and it definitely doesn't make anaerobic respiration efficient.
**Tanya, I don't like to be a nag, but-.**
**We're just about ready! But… The queen's come with me. I think she thinks I'm a new queen or something.**
**Is that important?**
I take a half-second to glance back at the flock. Definitely closer, but they seem to have decided that they're better served by letting me tire myself out rather than diving down as fast as they can.
**I don't know. I don't know these ants. Some types can have nests with multiple queens but with others the new queens take half the workers and soldiers and leave to start their own nest. I've never seen a situation where the old queen chooses to hang out with a new queen.**
I look around at the cliff sides surrounding me and spot the small tunnel entrances that show that this is ant territory. That might explain why the banshees are hanging back. I didn't think they were intelligent enough for something like that, but… Maybe?
**I'm sure that entomologists of the future will thank you for your work. I'm bringing the banshees to you.**
**Not to me! They didn't even give me a gun and I lost my ripper trying to fight off that giant robot! All I've got is a tiny knife!**
**I'm bringing the banshees to your ambush point, and I'm finding the ambush point by homing in on you. If you're too far away then I won't find it.**
**Okay. There's an old semi-collapsed tunnel. I'm in some sort of maintenance tunnel near that, and the ants are poised to swarm in.**
**Anything I need to worry-**
The sand to my left erupts with angry ant, and I have to use telekinesis to dodge a blob of something that makes the sand hiss when it lands.
**-about, like burrowed ants?**
**Most of the workers have pulled back, but leaving soldier ants as sentries-**
**I just ran past one.**
**-and oh. Okay, it's probably emitting a warning pheromone, so the other ants will be on guard.**
**How do ants sense their targets?**
**Vision and smell. Ah, depending on how close you were, you probably got covered in the warning pheromone, so you can't just outrun it.**
**Not a problem.**
I can just about hear the warrior ant chasing after me, maintaining a surprisingly quick pace even if it can't quite keep up with me. And of course it can't smell the banshees at all from down here, but it's probably continuing to emit that warning pheromone as long as it chases me. So while I could telepathically muffle its senses, I don't. I let it keep-.
What's that?
I jink left and slow, turning and heading towards the opposite canyon wall. A small chance that the banshees will use this opportunity to dive, but I think I've got time and I… Yes, there it is. I grab a small device that was dropped near the canyon wall before turning back to my original course and accelerating again. The ant isn't quite as agile as me and has to actually stop to change direction. So I haven't lost my lead but…
What is this?
It looks a little like a speaker, and there's a radio receiver built into it. Did Doki plant these so that she could communicate with the contestants? I… Think I can… Hear some sort of… Quiet noise? Static? Getting any kind of signal in a canyon isn't easy, as even long wave would struggle to get down here. Don't know. I put it in one of my robe's pockets of later analysis.
And I turn the corner-
Buried ant! Dodge!
-and I see the unfinished section of pre-War road leading to a porous pile of rubble which forms the shape of an amphitheatre. And this time I use my telekinetic sense to feel-. Ants. Lots of them. But that passage over there feels more like a complete utility tunnel of the sort I've seen in dozens of pre-War subterranean structures.
And the entrance…
**Can you open the door?**
**Not without squeezing past two royal guard ants while smelling like someone they're supposed to guard with their lives.**
**Right.** I feel more ants buried in the ground nearby, and the ones in the rocks are preparing to attack as they smell the danger pheromone on me. So I slow to a halt, turn and aim my pistol at the flock just above the canyon rim. **Drawing the banshees in now.**
I fire and miss, the range being too long for the relatively slow bolt of plasma to be at all accurate. I fire and miss again, but they're getting the idea that I'm an actual threat they need to deal with rather than something they can wait to die of dehydration. About half swoop into the canyon in my direction while the rest begin flapping to get over my head.
**My control of these ants isn't precise. If they decide to go-.**
**Understood. Apropos of nothing, would you like ant control psychic powers?**
**Uh, what? You mean-. You can control ants? If you can-? Why am I here?**
**Specialisation. I can talk to you and do other things but I'm not good at controlling animals.**
**Ah… I don't know. That was a… My parents got killed by giant ants, and then I… I got convinced that ants were some sort of amazing super species. I don't think making ants my whole life again would be a good idea.**
Fair enough.
**I do know a guy, though.**
**Oh?**
**Yeah. After I… Had some sense talked into me by this… Really hot guy, I ended up meeting this ant researcher who was trying to make ants less dangerous by making them smaller-**
**Oh? That sounds-.**
**-by injecting their eggs with some kinda virus. He ended up giving them the ability to breathe fire.**
**Maybe not, then. I'd rather have someone who knows that giant mutant ants aren't the solution to all of life's problems than someone who thinks: 'giant mutant ants: dangerous, but could they be more dangerous?'.**
**I think he only killed that town by accident…**
…
I might need to send more people to Washington before too long.
"kEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYAH!"
Here we go! Banshees flying along the canyon are approaching slowly in order to use their screech, while two of those above me are tucking their wings in to swoop! I start running towards the centre of the amphitheatre, firing half-aimed shots at the banshees above me. An ant unburies itself to my right and another sticks its head out through a hole, but I dash past them in a blur before their acid sprays can hit me.
"kEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYAH!"
The ants behind me shudder, turning their attention to-. The low-flying flock has increased their speed, and I can feel the increased aggression from them. Not sure what's doing that-.
**The ants are going crazy! Whatever you're doing-**
I reach into my robes, trigger my Stealth Boy and dash over to a nearby overhang.
**-you better-.**
Banshees jostle for position, sonic energy able to detect me perfectly well. The ants on the other hand…
**Let them attack.**
And then the carnage begins.
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