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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Reader mode
Mr Zoat said:
Huh. Haven't decided. The Renegade kind of remembers the black-haired comic Grayven, but his appearance was altered by Father Box who knew the white-haired version. I'm leaning towards dark hair to make it easier to visually distinguish them in this pure text story, but that isn't a firm decision.
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This seems like a teachable moment.

Renegade has been 'Gravened' for several RL years now. If his hair color has been described so infrequently the readers cannot remember what it is supposed to be, that is bad, M'kay?

If the writer himself doesn't know what his hair color because he hasn't decided despite the character having had that form for years, and the author having written him for years, that is worse.

I'm now imagining Renegraven fanart, with 'under construction' spapped liberally around everywhere. Like the hair, the eyes, and who knows where else?

Are you sure you haven't written the color somewhere and forgotten? Or had him bald? You described his translated by magic pony form as a dark black, right? Would the spell change his hair color?
 
All the necessary information is in the first chapter. First name of your dad is Colin, from Eastbourne, and a retired biologist. Google and some patience later, an article about the retirement of one Colin Tallowin. Some cursory searches for Paul Tallowin reveals he exists, is about the right age, and has a sister, which also fits. I've known for quite a while, but seeing other people guess is kinda funny.

Edit: Annoyingly, I can't find the article anymore

More funny is dropping the answer to a year's long question out of the blue from an account with an obviously dumb name and barely a smattering of activity.
 
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HereforZooat said:
All the necessary information is in the first chapter. First name of your dad is Colin, from Eastbourne, and a retired biologist. Google and some patience later, an article about the retirement of one Colin Tallowin. Some cursory searches for Paul Tallowin reveals he exists, is about the right age, and has a sister, which also fits. I've known for quite a while, but seeing other people guess is kinda funny.

More funny is dropping the answer to a year's long question out of the blue from an account with an obviously dumb name and barely a smattering of activity.
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Thank you for telling us this.
 
HereforZooat said:
Paul Tallowin
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Mr Zoat said:
Gosh. That was a surprise. Well done. Have we met?
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Ok. I would have never guessed that. Never even heard that word before today, and it sounds sort of made up. I doubt Robin ever got close throwing out candle related candidates.

Also, in retrospect, Peter Wynne was another clue. Appropriating part of his last name in a way that he could speak, but to us (and Batman), just sounded like he was having a bit of fun with the Rich Capitalist Archetype, and maybe poking fun at Batman/Wayne


Flightless Man said:
What if Dox wanted Paragon removed as "collateral" damage he would have had no tie to. For all we know he told Grayven where Paul was going. It was very secret right? and Grayven arrives in the what 2 minutes the OL corp showed. For all we know he WANTs the Corp to be HIS
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One one had this would be a dumb thing for Dox to do, burning the man who freed him and has been nothing but accommodating in giving him the job. On the other hand, brainics don't have the best track record for making smart choices. The one from the 24th century time travel arc was more harm than help, and the one in ReneGraven future apparently did something in the battle with StarSnuffer™ that got the entire universe minus earth destroyed.
 
Bramble Thorn said:
One one had this would be a dumb thing for Dox to do, burning the man who freed him and has been nothing but accommodating in giving him the job. On the other hand, brainics don't have the best track record for making smart choices. The one from the 24th century time travel arc was more harm than help, and the one in ReneGraven future apparently did something in the battle with StarSnuffer™ that got the entire universe minus earth destroyed.
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To be fair, Starbreaker would have probably destroyed the universe by himself, eventually.
 
Mr Zoat said:
"We are not so separate that one can banish the other, but since it offends you so much, I will make a temporary accommodation."
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Mr Zoat said:
We step into him, twisting and bending his desire networks, leaving him writhing in confusion before we finally leave, heading after our fleet and our Lanterns. As a New God he will recover in short order, but perhaps he will learn some manners? But now, we have a victory to earn.
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This shit is why I find your so-called SI OC so compelling a character.

I really enjoy the level at which he has been removed from normal human considerations.

He can, at the same time: make an accommodation for the comfort of someone being an asshole for no reason and then invade their personal space on a pretty fucked up level, and both are about as significant to him holding a door open for someone.
 
Vanbers said:
I can't tell if he disliked the Ophidian because it was looking at him, or if it's because he just got freaked out and angry.
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It seems like an uncanny valley thing. Paul's orange light communication feels apocalypsian to New Genesis new gods, but to ones actually from Apocalyps it's probably close but not quite right.
 
Ngamer11 said:
I wouldn't say Paul vastly outclasses Grayven. Other than that, I agree with your statement. Grayven is probably not used to anyone being polite with him. Everyone is either someone who can crush him (i.e. Darkseid), or someone he can crush (i.e. most mortals).
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Given Grayven could do that "fight as equals" thing and shut almost everything of Paragon's down whether Paragon outclasses him or not is kind of moot.
 
Darko said:
At least it's not Disney.
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Warner Brothers actually

HereforZooat said:
All the necessary information is in the first chapter. First name of your dad is Colin, from Eastbourne, and a retired biologist. Google and some patience later, an article about the retirement of one Colin Tallowin. Some cursory searches for Paul Tallowin reveals he exists, is about the right age, and has a sister, which also fits. I've known for quite a while, but seeing other people guess is kinda funny.

Edit: Annoyingly, I can't find the article anymore

More funny is dropping the answer to a year's long question out of the blue from an account with an obviously dumb name and barely a smattering of activity.
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Did....you just halfway dox Zoat?
 
I thought the riddle for Mr. Zoat's name was to guess it but never say it in the thread or to people that doesn't know?

I remember finding it when Coda mentioned having found it (in the previous thread, I think?) and thinking "that's a last name I had never seen", but his last name has rarely been relevant to the story. Honestly, had even forgot about it.

And I think I remember that the Renegade has dark hair... or was implied to have dark hair and nobody mentioned that it wasn't so...
 
This felt like OL was talking to/humoring baby smaug.
1xTCHK0
images
 
Gothamghast (part 3)
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    July 3rd 2012, 08:32 GMT -7
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    I didn't see a lotta nature growing up in Gotham. Poison Ivy hadn't taken over Robinson Park yet, but the Falcones already owned the mayor's office and the city council. Money for parks and recreation wasn't exactly high on their priority list. And trips with Dad out to the forest weren't exactly nature walks.

    I don't know if it's because they're ponies or because they haven't industrialised yet, but the ponies have a lot more nature around their towns. Canterlot.. just.. stops once you get off the mountain. And then there's miles of moorland before you get to… This place.

    It's called Ponyville. I know I'm just getting a translation from Sunset's spell, but that's not even a pun. It's just 'pony' with 'ville' stuck on the end. We don't have towns called 'Humanville'. Yeah, Grayven said there's a place in England called 'Manchester', and apparently there's some place in Vietnam called 'Hue', but it's not literally every town on the planet.

    "Bit for your thoughts?"

    The pink… Ah… Pinkie Pie? I'm guessing this is the local one, but I don't know how Grayven tells them apart. It's probably something to do with him starting to reorganise their government and so counting them as his 'subjects', but arrows don't really have personalities. If I wanted to work out the differences I'd probably need to go hunting with them or something.

    I look around the apple orchard.

    "How do you pick these without hands?"

    Pinkie Probably Pie grins, shaking her head, her mane flopping back and forward like it's made of rubber. "We don't, silly. How would we pick things without hands?"

    …

    "I-. With your mouths? That's how most ponies I've seen move stuff."

    Pinkie Pie frowns. "I think that would bruise the skin. And it would take a really long time. And it would probably make a lot of ponies strain their necks. And have you tried to go up a ladder as a pony? We're really not designed for ladders."

    "I guess… Okay, how do you get the apples off the trees?"

    Pinkie Pie perks up. "I'll show you!" And then she perks down. "Well, okay, I won't show you, because last time I tried to do it… It didn't go too well. But my friend Applejack can show you!"

    "Let's go find Applejack, then."

    Pinkie Pie… Bounces, all four legs acting like springs. Is that something ponies can do? Ponies like Wilson-ponies. I haven't seen any of the others do it, but maybe they just think it looks silly? Or maybe it's really hard? I've gotten the hang of walking with four hooves, but I can't run-. Or.. trot? Yet.

    "Hey, do you have deer around here?"

    "Of course not. This is an apple orchard, not a deer orchard." Pinke Pie gasps, then her head twists around like an owl's neck while she keeps bouncing. "Unless they're in disguise!"

    "Ah, yeah, no, I meant; can deer talk on this planet? Are they intelligent, like ponies?"

    "Wouldn't they be intelligent like deer?"

    "That's a tautology. Look, I know gryphons and dragons are as intelligent as ponies, but regular dogs and cats aren't."

    "Oh."

    "So?"

    "So?"

    "Are deer intelligent like gryphons, dragons and ponies are?"

    "I don't know. I've never met a deer. But the only zebra I've met is super-nice, so, maybe?"

    "How about giraffes?"

    "What are those?"

    Right. Pre-industrial, in the middle of a continent. They probably didn't even have a map of their planet until Grayven gave them one.

    "They look sorta like ponies, but a lot bigger and with really long necks. And they've got two little-" I go cross-eyed for a second trying to look at my horn. "-horns on their heads."

    "Huh. I dunno, but now I really wanna meet one! They probably could pick apples without a ladder!"

    "Yeah, probably."

    I don't… I mean, yeah, this place is about as far from the Land of Summer's End as you can get, and I guess Grayven wanted to spend some time with Princess Luna, but I don't.. really…

    I don't know why I'm here. I think Grayven wants to put me in a relaxing environment, without all of the people and places I keep thinking I should remember but don't. But I think that's just… Putting it off? If he was just trying to break me out of a 'downward spiral' or something-.

    "Hey, AJ!"

    A pale orange pony with a.. cowboy hat. Huh? Why would a pony wear a hat to keep the sun off when they're not wearing clothes and they're covered in fur? That-. Anyway, the orange pony with the apple butt tattoo looks up from taking buckets off a cart.

    "Well hey there Pinkie Pie! Who's yer friend?"

    "This is Artey! She came through the magic mirror like Grayven did!"

    'AJ' starts looking decidedly less welcoming. "That right."

    "Uh-huh! And she wants to know how we get apples off the trees!"

    "Well, that's easy. We buck 'em."

    I frown, and I feel the pull as my horn stops the skin over my forehead moving.

    "You.. buck them?"

    "Why, we surely do! I'll show ya!"

    Applejack grabs one bucket after another, rapidly tossing them into a rough circle around one of the apple trees. Weird they all stay upright, but I guess the bases are weighted or something?

    "Watch real careful, y'all."

    Applejack backs up towards the tree, and it looks like she's carefully judging the distance. So, what, she kicks the tree and the apples fall off? How can that wo-

    Next to me, Pinkie Pie inhales deeply, her lungs swelling.

    -rk..? Oh, is this one of those song th-?

    "Apple's a yummy, tree-growing fruit!
    Bucking them is a bucker's strong suit!
    Because you see it's really a breeze!
    Pull your legs back and buck all the trees!"

    Applejack kinda leans forward, lifts her back legs up and thrusts them into the tree. The tree vibrates, the apples shake, then… Fall… Perfectly into the buckets?

    What?

    "You can buck peaches and you can buck limes!
    And you can buck figs if you've got the time!
    And if you want to buck down some sloes!
    Swing your legs hard and see how it goes!"

    Pinkie Pie prances around as Applejack continues buck-.

    "Apple's a yummy, tree-growing fruit!
    Bucking them is a bucker's strong suit!
    Because you see it's really a breeze!
    Lift your tail up and buck all the trees!"

    Wait. Wait. Lift your-? What's she saying?

    "If fruit-bearing trees aren't how you swing!
    You can buck just about anything!
    Buck on a wood plank to drive in the nails!
    Or buck a ship-mast to open the sails!"

    Is she..?

    "Apple's a yummy, tree-growing fruit!
    Bucking them is a bucker's strong suit!
    Because you see it's really a breeze!
    Spread your legs wide and buck all the trees!"

    This is-!

    "Srk!"

    "Buck on a mountain to knock down a rock!
    Buck on a tower to start up a clock!
    Buck on a stuck pipe to start up a flow!
    You can try bucking wherever you go!"

    "Apple's a yummy, tree-growing fruit!
    Bucking them is a bucker's strong suit!
    Because you see it's really a breeze!
    Stretch your haunches and buck all the trees!"

    …

    "Hahahahaha!"
     
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