Darko
Connoisseur.
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He attention is completely absorbed by the hologram of the working factory.
"His attention"
"am an expert"
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He attention is completely absorbed by the hologram of the working factory.
Thank you, corrected.
Tau women have tits...
Have you not seen the art? Because it's pretty blatant.
"rather than a complete reliance on the consumption of nutrients in the form of food, Orks have a primitive and basic ability to photosynthesise. This would give them a tremendous advantage over other races as they can reduce their supply lines to ammunition and fuel and all the other parts of war, but without the need to transport perishable goods. The blood of an Ork is also interesting, in that it contains countless distinct fungal organisms and has a chlorophyll high content, with trace elements of carbon and copper."I'd like a reference for that. Orks get bigger, yes, but I don't remember anything saying that they don't have to eat to gain that mass.
I'm going with this.I know almost nothing about the lore, but when I looked it up on the wiki, it said there were only two official illustrations of a tau female, one looks more 'human female' and the other looked more like the tau males. I could be completely wrong about that, but I'm pretty certain that's what I read.
The only biological reason (that I can think) for them to have breasts would be if they nurse their young, and I've no clue if they do.
That would let them produce sugar using matter already in their body. It wouldn't let them increase their mass."rather than a complete reliance on the consumption of nutrients in the form of food, Orks have a primitive and basic ability to photosynthesise. This would give them a tremendous advantage over other races as they can reduce their supply lines to ammunition and fuel and all the other parts of war, but without the need to transport perishable goods. The blood of an Ork is also interesting, in that it contains countless distinct fungal organisms and has a chlorophyll high content, with trace elements of carbon and copper."
Orkoid physiology - Warhammer 40k - Lexicanum
Might not be true. But it's popular enough that the misconception could have spread pretty far.
Oh I'm not supporting it. Just showing where the misconception could have started.That would let them produce sugar using matter already in their body. It wouldn't let them increase their mass.
Good to know, although it wouldn't have been surprising.
Hey, you never know. Does Darkseid use the Omega Effect to clean the shit from his ass?
No, one one thousandth of a year has passed.
I repeat... Tau female have boobs...I know almost nothing about the lore, but when I looked it up on the wiki, it said there were only two official illustrations of a tau female, one looks more 'human female' and the other looked more like the tau males. I could be completely wrong about that, but I'm pretty certain that's what I read.
The only biological reason (that I can think) for them to have breasts would be if they nurse their young, and I've no clue if they do.
I repeat... Tau female have boobs...
MOD EDIT - You MIGHT wanna find a SFW Tau female pic
Zoat posted what he was using for a female. Not certain if there are any boobs there, but does it really matter? I mean, sure, if motor-boating or paizuri is a requirement, then it matters. But otherwise?
And this is Paul. We've seen him simp on Superboy and mate with a Transformer. I don't think he's the type to care about breasts.
Or Ultramar.The Imperium very much does bother. Just not equally. But then. The Tau have never run into a forge world before.
The funny thing?
Which to be fair, isn't that most Imperial worlds near the Tau border?The funny thing?
This wasn't even a real Hive world.
Because real Hive Worlds are basically gothic Cyberpunk dystopia's and this read more like one of the regressed Hive cities that you find on some mostly abandoned border world.
BWahaha!"I believe-" She gets up. "-that my curiosity-" She walks around the table. "-must be satiated by more direct st-."
She tries to sit on my knees, misses, and ends up on the floor.
Who's Miss Lantern?"A human, from a enculturated world, perhaps? Or… Miss Lantern?"
And this is still early enough in their space-going era that some of that idealism hasn't completely been driven out of them by the Galaxy at large. Sadly, that is likely to change, no matter what happens. Because Grim-dark galaxy is grim-derp...6 564 941.M41
One nice thing about the older kor'vattra ships is that they lounges and function rooms designed to be comfortable meeting places. Rounded tables capable of being raised or lowered to whatever height was appropriate for the tau's guests, and soft backless seats that were the designer's best guess for the widest variety of possible new friends. Because, naturally, the aliens they would encounter when the tau first flew into deep space would -baring unfortunate misunderstanding- be friendly and open to the idea of the Greater Good.
Kor'or'vesh being more modern warships, of course. Plenty of big guns, armour and very few diplomatic allowances...Kor'or'vesh ships are built with different principles in mind.
Tsua'm lowers herself into one of the tau-friendly chairs next to a low-set table, an alien seat opposite her already adjusting itself to what the ship's AI has listed as a me-appropriate height. I wait for it to stop and lock itself in place before sitting down myself.
Getting straight to it, eh? No dancing around the subject, just right to it. How Fire-Caste of you.
Miss 'Lantern' being the Earth caste lady mentioned earlier with a noticeable affinity for Avarice... I don't think P'Aul's quite into muscle."As.. opposed to..?"
"A human, from a enculturated world, perhaps? Or… Miss Lantern?"
Probably a good thing, then. Imagine if they decided Ring aptitude could be bred."Ah… Degree of social interaction? We haven't spend a significant amount of time on a world like that, and it wouldn't make sense to base ourselves on one. Which means that unless I… Ask for some people to get brought to Lar'shi, which is a pointless use of resources unless there was another reason to bring them or I somehow knew that one was a perfect match for me."
"There is been a motion which gets brought before the Eugenics Board at periodic intervals to expand their remit to other species. So far, they have always decided that outside of overt mutation, they simply don't know enough about alien biology to perform their usual duties."
Honestly, they do need someone looking for psychics in Human populations, now that there's no Administratum folks handling it."Tau castes pretty much require that sort of thing. If you were going to set up an equivalent thing for human-inhabited worlds… Well, you couldn't, the populations are too high, but you'd need a new organisation rather than one that would try imposing things that make sense for tau onto humans. And it would make more sense to monitor for psykic potential rather than trying to maximise their capacity for a particular trade."
"Tau caste require that sort of thing because we find tau in other castes attractive."
Some things are just universal, of course..."I'd love to see the statistics on that. I've got a few suspicions about why."
"Oh? Tell me. I would be interested in an alien perspective."
Actually true. Smart guys have looked into it and everything."Tau castes are based on the pre-unification tribal groups, right? The tribes had skills that lent themselves to particular activities, and T'au society went from simply having those characteristics to deliberately exaggerating them. But the tribes looked a lot more like each other than the modern day castes do, right?" She nods. "So the castes are a recent thing, and your brains haven't really adapted to them yet. It's the same as the reason why I find small furry things with big eyes appealing; human children are small and have relatively big eyes, and our evolutionary predecessors were furry."
Heh. Because ladies love their beef and gents enjoy the thicc. But those Air Caste skinnies? Deep in the Uncanny Valley, I guess."So our devotion to the Greater Good must fight against our mont'au instincts."
"Your brain is rigged to look for certain things in your mates. If I had to guess, I'd say that… Fire Caste and Earth Caste males were generally considered most attractive males, and… Water Caste females… And Maybe Ethereal females would be considered the most attractive females. And Air Caste were the least appealing of both sexes."
Yep. And even you Etherals aren't immune. Which makes it interesting when you throw species like Humans into the mix."Because they are the most divergent from our ancestral forms. Fire and Earth have traits which make them seem more male to the primitive parts of our brains. And… Water Caste…"
Her eyes blink rapidly as she considers the idea.
For best results, don't have any identifying elements on the image to hint at Caste."I… Will attempt to confirm that when we arrive at T'au."
"Why bother?" I shrug. "Just take a load of facial images and ask everyone on board to rate their attractiveness. There's no need to look at people who actually broke the Eugenics Board's rules."
Of course, movement plays a big part too. No doubt Tau ladies have a nice swing when they walk... After all, plantigrade and ungulate feet in certain fandoms are sometimes stand-ins for high heels when it comes to posing or animation..."But how does that apply to humans? You."
"You have the same softer skin and more rounded faces that a human female would compared to a human male. And none of the traits that would suggest poor health in a human."
And exotic skin colours can tickle a certain xenophilic spot in some people. Technicolour space babes are a thing for a reason."Blue skin is not the sign of a healthy human."
"No, but it's so unusual that our genes haven't adapted to encourage avoiding it outside of the 'avoid the strange' programming."
Heh. I'll bet."And I am not strange?"
"Most of the people I interact with on a daily basis are tau. I've even picked up some of the language, and I'm terrible with languages. I guess I've just… Adapted." … "The humans being weird probably helped."
Ah, just business on that front, eh?"So you are not attracted to Miss Lantern because as an Earth Caste female she has a more masculine appearance."
"It doesn't help. It's also because… When I spend time with her, it's more professional. It's a professional occasion. I spend more time with you socially. And even if we… My knowledge of physics isn't good enough to.. share her interests."
...To be fair, Fire Caste females might take him as a challenge, somehow..."And the females of Kais's squad have a similar impediment."
"'Impediment'?" I raise my eyebrows. "Is there some sort of contest going on that I don't know about?"
Aw, no betting pools about his love life?She shakes her head once. "No."
I slump theatrically. "Harsh."
Well, they have trained for years in Xenosociology. It's literally their job to understand other races' behaviour. Being able to employ that knowledge in more casual circumstances? Surely very enjoyable.For a moment she looks genuinely concerned, but I can see in her face the moment she grasps that it's a joke. And as she decides to use human body language, smiling and covering her mouth with her right hand.
"See? You get me. It's basically just you and Bo'ohk who can do that."
Ooh, there's a sore spot. Best not to poke that too often, P'Aul."I suppose that I do. How would it work?"
"We would spend more time together, engage in recreational activities together… It's not something I've done much, and from what you said about your mother's efforts to help you make contacts-" Her right hoof twitches. "-you hadn't either. So we'd be finding out together."
Because of course some Tau's already tried to date humans...
Ooh, how forward, P'Aul."There are… Primitive human societies within the Tau Empire, where there have been… Ceremonial marriages between a member of the Water Caste and one of their people."
"I'm not planning on us being ceremonial."
Hopefully in terms that won't leave her blushing to her hooves."Officially ceremonial. It is.. not impossible, that things are… Different, in practice. Under the circumstances, I will request… Further information from those involved."
"Huh."
...The places this story goes, sometimes..."It would difficult. The Eugenics Board may not be so pushy as my mother, but I will be expected to have children at some point."
I shrug. "That's why I'm planning to ask for access to their full database. It should be perfectly possible for me to… Create a genetic sequence that's a tau-equivalent of me. If we… Got that far."
Like I said: Power Rings can overcome all manner of physical barriers. Especially in matters of girth and length."And sex? I assume that you want to have sex with me. Our… Systems are not completely compatible."
"A nerve ending doesn't know how it's being stimulated. I think there are ways around what might be a problem, in a more primitive society. I am confident in my ability to satisfy your requirements."
Though he's still thinking in acquisitive terms, not entirely romantic, I see."You have thought about it in depth?"
"I've thought about you in depth." She nods. "So? Further queries?"
Tau depth perception, folks! <Cue the laugh track!> At least she ticks the 'clumsy girl' trait."I believe-" She gets up. "-that my curiosity-" She walks around the table. "-must be satiated by more direct st-."
She tries to sit on my knees, misses, and ends up on the floor.
...ships is that their lounges and function rooms are designed to be comfortable meeting places....ships is that they lounges and function rooms designed to be comfortable meeting places.
-barring unfortunate misunderstanding-
"A human, from an enculturated world, perhaps?
...between a member of the Water Caste and one of their people."...between a member of the Waste Caste and one of their people."
Please... Do this...And it would make more sense to monitor for psykic potential rather than trying to maximise their capacity for a particular trade."
Is this "There has been" or "There is a"? Or is it T'au mangled english?There is been a motion which gets brought before the Eugenics Board at periodic intervals to expand their remit to other species.
The earth caste researcher whose job it is to work out how his ring works.
The water caste are actually pretty bad at that job. The diplomats in Fire Warrior didn't know what medals were, and actually managed to anger the Imperial Navy officers by treating them as decorative tassels.Well, they have trained for years in Xenosociology. It's literally their job to understand other races' behaviour. Being able to employ that knowledge in more casual circumstances? Surely very enjoyable.
Some corrections:
...ships is that their lounges and function rooms are designed to be comfortable meeting places.
-barring unfortunate misunderstanding-
"A human, from an enculturated world, perhaps?
...between a member of the Water Caste and one of their people."
Thank you, corrected.Is this "There has been" or "There is a"? Or is it T'au mangled english?
If I had to guess, I'd say that… Fire Caste and Earth Caste males were generally considered most attractive males,
And this is still early enough in their space-going era that some of that idealism hasn't completely been driven out of them by the Galaxy at large. Sadly, that is likely to change, no matter what happens. Because Grim-dark galaxy is grim-derp...
Miss 'Lantern' being the Earth caste lady mentioned earlier with a noticeable affinity for Avarice... I don't think P'Aul's quite into muscle.
Probably a good thing, then. Imagine if they decided Ring aptitude could be bred.
Like I said: Power Rings can overcome all manner of physical barriers. Especially in matters of girth and length.
"And sex? I assume that you want to have sex with me. Our… Systems are not completely compatible."
It does occur to me that if this can be expanded to, for example, create the genetic sequence for a Fire Caste member that closely resembles a water caste member in the those aspects of physicality and personality that are not distinct to their caste, there may be some applications for the Eugenics board."It would difficult. The Eugenics Board may not be so pushy as my mother, but I will be expected to have children at some point."
I shrug. "That's why I'm planning to ask for access to their full database. It should be perfectly possible for me to… Create a genetic sequence that's a tau-equivalent of me. If we… Got that far."