With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

B00ki5h · 2024-11-07T06:57:41+0000

Mr Zoat said:
sack barrow

Now that's a term I haven't heard in a while. These days I hear Dolly or handcart.

Chojin Patriarch · 2024-11-07T07:03:40+0000

Mr Zoat said:
April 28th, 2013
09:43 EST

Janet looks confused as she works the cafeteria coffee machine. "Oh, I don't know. I think that stuff gets handled at whatever department we send the data to. You'd have to ask Miss Teschmacher about it."

I nod as I look around the empty room. I always figured that every part of LexCorp would be a 24-7 operation, but I guess that Business Development isn't quite that time critical? If they're forecasting years or decades in advance, then there's no reason why a… A treasury report, or people starting buying slightly more hats all of a sudden really changes anything.

True, most offices have their regular hours on weekdays, mostly because nearly every other business does, and, you know, employees like to have some time off. We're not living in Cyberpunk with it's hundred-hour-weeks yet.

"Thanks."

She smiles as she puts the coffee down, and I can tell from the smell that she forgot the cream and sugar. If this is all it usually takes, I'm starting to get a little worried about how lonely male metahumans must be.

Well, the handsome ones probably don't have much trouble. It's the guys who don't have Adonis looks that probably see trouble connecting with people.

"It is a good idea though. I know we get loads of data on areas that LexCorp doesn't operate in. You should mention it to her next time you see her."

It wasn't anything radically clever on my part, but it would make sense for this part of the company to sell its conclusions to other businesses. Aside from anything else, it would let them mark out potential acquisition targets.

As long as said sales happened long enough after Lexcorp responded to it that they had a fair lead, I suppose... That's probably the tack the Lexcop executives would take, anyway.

I take a sip of my coffee, which… Yeah, Ferdinand would put whoever made this through remedial coffee training. It's… Making me think about how lucky I am. I grow up in an embassy with someone as great as Princess Diana as my mom and Connor as my brother, and Johanna… Had none of that. No real parents and her sister got cut up for parts. I take another sip. It's… Pretty bad. I don't know if it's just me or something, but this sort of coffee combined with super smell and super taste… It's not a good combination. I can't just try and get used to it or ignore it, I've just got to accept the bitterness.

Bitterness is a part of adulthood, you know. As for the coffee, it's a weekend. You're lucky there's anything in the pot besides black sludge.

"Does this place always shut down on Sundays?"

"Not completely. Catering and I.T. are usually in doing cleaning or whatever while everyone else is on a break." She looks around like she's only just noticing that the place is empty. "Huh. I guess I'm just in early today."

Yes, very coincidental, I'm sure.

Oh great. So they made sure that everyone except the company white goat is away from the site. Maybe when whatever they've got planned happens I can hide her in a cupboard and use some of my powers? But if there aren't any robots here then I don't really see what-.

"She-ee's a killah queeeeen!"

If it's not a robot attack, it'll be corporate raiders. Well, you've trained on how to take down regular humans, right? At least there's nto many people in the line of fire at this stage.

Janet grabs her phone. "Hey Miss Teschmacher! … Yeah, he's right here." She holds the phone away from her ear. "She says 'hey'." Hm? Oh yeah, just showing him around. … No, are we expecting anyone? A delivery? Ooh, does this mean that someone else has to carry it up this time?" She stares at my right arm for some reason. "Yes he does. … No, like, five feet away? … Okay. I will. See you on Monday!"

Joy. The best kind of internship work: lugging heavy objects around.

She puts the phone down.

"Okay, so apparently there's some kind of delivery coming today. Would you mind bringing it up for me?"

Getting a feel for the real office experience: being the low step of the totem pole.

"Uh." I shrug. "Sure. I can do that. What is it?"

"Oh." She frowns. "She didn't say. Is it a problem?"

Let me guess, it's going to turn out to be big, heavy and awkward? Just the thing for gauging his strength.

"Well, if it's something small then I don't mind but if it's something big then I might need help. Won't the delivery guys just bring it to where you ask?"

She shrugs. "Miss Teschmacher didn't think so. Maybe it's a security thing?"

Makes sense. and since it's a Sunday, their regular mail room would be shut.

"I'm not even a LexCorp employee."

"Yeah, but you wouldn't have gotten this far if you hadn't passed vetting. And it's not like we don't know who you are. Wonder Woman suddenly having two sons was kind of a big deal. I mean, who are we gunna mistake you for, Clark Kent?"

As I've said before, the internet must be going nuts with rumours about their parentage.

Ah. "Who's that?"

"This reporter guy who did an article on our work one time. He made it sound really sinister."

I.. frown. "Sinister how?"

It'd be hard to beat out guys like Ralph Nader for exposes, though. Then again, Clark has won at least one Pulitzer Prize, albeit for other writing.

"Like… We worked out that the market in laundrette washing machines was gunna shrink in future even though demand was strong right then, and that went up to the Board and a couple of factories got shut down."

"Okay, that… Sounds like normal business to me."

Wonder how they figured that, anyway?

"Yeah. But… Okay, so, apparently, during the… Thirties? Car companies used to buy up tram and bus companies and close them down to create more demand for cars. And so the article said that because we weren't producing as much while demand was high, then the price would go up, and then laundrettes can't get washers or parts then they go out of business so they put their prices up, which means that buying a home washer starts being a better choice. And, y'know, LexCorp makes then too."

Kind of short-sighted. It's not like other companies wouldn't step up.

"But if you make both, why do you care which one gets bought?"

"Oh, well, that actually made sense."

Presumably the home units have a different profit margin?

…

"Okay, how?"

Quantity over quality, in this case. After all, laundromats only need so many machines, but there are a lot more private homes than laundromats.

"The laundrette models get used a lot more, right? So they're built to be easy to maintain and the laundrette attendants learn how to fix basic stuff. But the home versions are made to be smaller, so they can actually fit through regular-sized doors and into peoples' utility rooms and stuff. But that makes them harder to maintain and so they stop working after fewer washes."

People are also more likely to upgrade every couple of years, especially when they move house.

That… Ah, that sounds like it could be true? I don't-. I only wash my own clothes on Themysicra, and they don't use modern machines to do it.

"So what do you think about that?"

Heh. He knows how to do it the old-fashioned way, eh?

"It's not like it's a sinister plot. It's just convenient not to have to take all your clothes down the street to wash them, and that's the way the market was going. It's not like we can mind control people into buying the things we want them to. And we're not the only company making washer-driers; if we were wrong then other companies will pick up the slack."

There is that, yes. It's probably just suspicious to some that Lexcorp would shift gears before anyone else.

And… That sounds reasonable, too. I don't know. I always thought that LexCorp made most of its money in cutting edge technology, but I guess there's not much call for a superhero to know about the ins and outs of the washing machine market. You can't really punch normal business shenanigans, even if you wanted to.

And really, people don't need washing machines capable of calculating pi to a million digits, or running an AI. That's how it works. You make millions on the basics, and spend them on the fancy shit.

I take a moment to think about where I'm planning on interning.

Maybe I could do more good here than I thought?

Heh. That would be amusing. All the powers of Superman, and he spends his days working out retail market ebbs and flows.

"Actually, you do look kinda like Clark Kent." Her eyes widen. "Oh God, is he your Dad?"

I let myself look as awkward as I feel. "Ah, he'd have been in high school, and Mom was still on Themyscira. You know, with no contact with the outside world and no men. I mean, if he was really good at swimming I guess it wouldn't be completely impossible, but, ah… No."

Then again, I doubt Clark took any trips to Greece in his youth.

"So, like… Who is?"

"Ah…"

...They never really thought to cover that in his fake background?

Bring-bring! Bring-bring!

Janet huffs, and then picks up her cell. "Y'ello? Okay, we'll be right down."

That would be the 'delivery', then.

She hangs up and then stands up, giving me an excuse to abandon most of my coffee. "Okay, they're here. Let's head down."

I get up and follow her towards the elevator. "Did they say what it was?"

And how big it is. That is probably more important in this case, really.

"No, but it sounded like it was a computer company, so I guess it was something… Computery?"

So, bulky, but not all that heavy. That sounds like something that I can carry without giving away how strong I really am. Unless…

Then again, it could be bigger than he is, and most people can't lift something that big and awkward by themselves...

"Do you have a sack barrow?"

"A what?"

Also known as a hand truck. Among other names. To be fair, that's probably the name the Amazons use for it.

I mime out using one. "Like a.. sort of L-shape, with handles and two wheels? It's used for moving boxes."

"Oh! Yeah, I know what you mean. There's one in the post room on the first floor."

"Great! Let's go get it."

See, that's thinking like a human. Mechanical aid rather than trying to muscle it out.

This feels so mundane, really. Hanging around the break room, talking about casual stuff and handling the 'Well, someone's got to be in the office at this time, so...' jobs. And it's a place where being faster than a speeding bullet and stronger than a locomotive isn't going to help much. Might give Mitchell a better appreciation of how regular people do things that he's been missing out on in superhero circles.

NightmareWarden · 2024-11-07T07:17:22+0000

I wonder if there is a ticking time bomb of a young employee going through a similar ordeal at Wayne Enterprises. Someone with the hallmarks of a potential villain.

I bet the mental enhancement Batman experienced is making him review his old decisions, redouble his paranoia. Watching someone you """"know"""" needs to be bagged and tagged for jail? Not a low-stress activity for a righteous face-puncher.

Darko · 2024-11-07T07:21:13+0000

Mr Zoat said:
If this is all it usually takes, I'm starting to get a little worried about how lonely male metahumans must be.

Ehh, the egole man of steel and woman of kleenex thing may apply in a lot of cases.

Mr Zoat said:
This reporter guy who did an article on our work one time. He made it sound really sinister."

Usually because it is.

Mr Zoat said:
LexCorp makes then too."

"them too"

Mr Zoat said:
It's not like we can mind control people into buying the things we want them to.

Though if it's possible I'm sure Lex would so it.

Mr Zoat · 2024-11-07T08:25:43+0000

Darko said:
"them too"

Thank you, corrected.

Though if it's possible I'm sure Lex would so it.

"No, we did a feasibility study. Anything beyond normal advertising is too expensive and fades too quickly to be profitable."

cereal_lurker · 2024-11-07T09:30:48+0000

Mr Zoat said:
"I mean, who are we gunna mistake you for, Clark Kent?"

Ah. "Who's that?"

Mr Zoat said:
"Oh God, is he your Dad?"

I let myself look as awkward as I feel. "Ah, he'd have been in high school...

And this is how sneaks and scammers get information - If you don't know him, how do you know how old he'd have to be for him to be your dad.. Janet may sound like this, but she's already lowered his guard enough to make mistakes.

With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

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