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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

...A heavily biased version of the episode's events, but ironically mostly truthful... From a certain point of view.
Which basically means it's an ideal defense-lawyer position. The most favorable view, stretching but not breaking the truth.

I forget how much Terry-Bats was known to the general public, or how public perception of the Bat was at the time - depending on how the average New Yorker from outside of Gotham regards Batman, really, that position could have legs.
 
Just look at the D&D satanic panic for an example of what can happen when a mentally ill person gets hold of a perfectly harmless product and people decide to blame the set-dressing.
I like the implication that there actually were D&D ritual killings in this DCverse. Like... yeah, that tracks.
 
I like the implication that there actually were D&D ritual killings in this DCverse. Like... yeah, that tracks.
Ah, no. That was a reference to an actual real world event.

It's been a few years since I watched the episode. Did Solomon Grundy kill the people who resurrected him?
 
Considering how cosmic The Kindly Ones were portrayed in the Sandman series, I'm actually a little disappointed we didn't get to see the REAL Furies, though I suppose I could see it being explained that The Three currently known as "Cynthia, Mildred and Mordred" sometimes leave mortal affairs to lesser, individual aspects.
 
Considering how cosmic The Kindly Ones were portrayed in the Sandman series, I'm actually a little disappointed we didn't get to see the REAL Furies, though I suppose I could see it being explained that The Three currently known as "Cynthia, Mildred and Mordred" sometimes leave mortal affairs to lesser, individual aspects.

If I remember correctly they tried to intimidate Death in the comics, but she easily told them to fuck off.

It's important to remember that in the whole metaphysical sense, raw power may not necessarily matter as much.

The Furies had a narrative role of punishing those that did some wrong and Morpheus committed a wrong, so they had narrative power over him.

Heck, Dream may honestly be more vulnerable to that compared to other beings since the guy basically embodies stories and narratives.

Their killing of Dream may not be so much a show of their own strength as it is a show of Dream's weakness.

Plus if I remember correctly, Dream may have wanted to die.
 
If I remember correctly they tried to intimidate Death in the comics, but she easily told them to fuck off.
It's important to remember that in the whole metaphysical sense, raw power may not necessarily matter as much.
The Furies had a narrative role of punishing those that did some wrong and Morpheus committed a wrong, so they had narrative power over him.
Heck, Dream may honestly be more vulnerable to that compared to other beings since the guy basically embodies stories and narratives.
Their killing of Dream may not be so much a show of their own strength as it is a show of Dream's weakness.
Plus if I remember correctly, Dream may have wanted to die.

As I recall? Dream was willing to die because he saw himself as old, out of touch and to set in his ways. So he allowed himself to die so he could be replaced with a younger more flexibly minded version.
 
Reconstruction (part 18)
6th March 2013
03:15 GMT -5


Dr. Balewa crouches down, holding his hands out towards the Lazarus Pit like a man warming his hands on a fire.

"There are not many of these places in the world."

I nod. "And?"

"Your surmise was correct. The site is rejuvenated and can be used again. But I am not convinced thet this is the best use for it."

"We can resurrect maybe… Thirty people? How would you make that choice?"

"I would not. I am not God."

I nod. "Zauriel?"

"I am reminded of the Book of Job. Though the absence of those we love may be painful, the Lord of Hosts does not promise that the universe of His creation will be free from strife. These are tests for mortals to endure in life, with the certainty that it is in His most holy realm that a full accounting will be made."

"But you can't see any reason why this would cause any sort of demonic problem?"

"That is not the sole metric by which you should evaluate your actions, but no. That will not happen here. Those who died were heroic Christians, and their souls are moving towards unification with the Most High."

"And no one is going to throw a wobbler about this?"

Zauriel shakes his head. "No. A delay of a few decades is not offensive to the divine order. But even by your standards, I am not sure that their lives are more worth saving than others who have died. If it were my choice, I would give the damned a second chance, having seen the consequences of their decisions."

"I am afraid thet is not possible." Dr. Balewa pulls his hands in and stands up. "The bodies of all of those who died while they were exposed to the Anti-Life, their bodies were not purified. Restoring them to life would not be safe."

"That is unfortunate."

"You're sure that the Kings won't have a problem with it?"

"Unlike you, we accept the nature of the universe. That includes things that may temporarily remove things from the Lord's loving embrace. But have you reflected upon your own motives?"

"I don't need to. I'm doing it because I don't want Missus Hall to feel guilty."

"And not the minor divine Tisiphone?"

"Gosh, no. She could do with feeling more guilt. Might make her hesitate more before killing people for what they were because someone mind controlled them."

Zauriel nods slowly. "Yes. Guilt can be a powerful tool for moral education."

I turn towards Dr. Balewa. "Doctor, this hit me in the face earlier." I take the pie dish out of subspace and offer it to him. "Can you use it to track where Olympus is, and where Themyscira is?"

He moves it around in his hands, studying it carefully.

"No. The sudden removal of the Anti-Life and its replacement with the White Light has caused an upheaval in the thaumosphere. The old paths between realms are no longer stable or secure. Once things are calmer, then I can use it to track the gods of the Hellenes."

"Okay, thank you, keep it with you until then. I'll go and-. Go and get permission from the next of kin to attempt the resurrections."

6th March 2013
17:34 GMT +5


The young woman flails at me as I use a construct to pull her newly-reanimated body out of the pit. Empathic vision shows… Her mind is intact but confused, which is perfectly in-line with expectations. There isn't much point in trying to get through to her while the initial shock wears off a little, and… There isn't much that she could do to me. 'Naiad' has a small water-manipulation ability, most likely as a result of non-human heritage, but she's only ever been able to move relatively small volumes at not particularly high pressure. Honestly, she could do more working as a leak inspector for the Greek water authority, but if she wants to be a superhero then I suppose that I would be a bit of a hypocrite to tell her not to.

Perhaps this experience might make her reconsider.

I deposit her on the solid ground at the side of the now-exhausted pit and use my rings to remove as much of the residue as possible before recreating her costume around her. It's a bit basic -a wet suit with a logo sprayed on- but with a little luck the point of familiarity will encourage her to realise where she-.

I wince slightly as she pulls at the liquid inside my eyes as she stumbles to her feet. I can keep it in place using my rings but there's a slight delay and it feels really weird. Blinding suspects by making their eyes explode is discouraged in Justice League rules of engagement, but is not technically forbidden. I just don't do it to other people because I have better options, but for a water-manipulator it's distracting and makes it hard to see.

A flash-bang would still be better.

"Naiad? Are you there?"

She's staring at me, not quite seeing but not looking particularly happy with the situation.

"Naiad?"

"Gwuh..?" The water in my eyes stops moving and her eyes become a little more focused. Good. "Wha..?"

"You were rather badly injured, and-."

"Fury! She wanted to know where Alpha Centurion is! She's going to kill him!"

"Thank you for the warning. You'll be pleased to know that the evil spirit that was controlling Fury has been removed and everyone is safe. You're the last to recover."

She stares for a moment, then reaches up to feel her neck.

"We fixed that. You should be fine, but if you feel any remaining injuries, let me know."

Zauriel was right. All of the resurrections went off without issue. Which I suppose means that I can assume that we can use these on non-damned monotheistic people.

Naiad looks around. "Where are we?"

"The Russian Federation." I transmute the material of the pit into soil. "Don't worry, I can take you home in a few moments. Your parents are expecting you."

"Okay. But… What happens now? I mean-. You know, right?"

"To Greece, or the world in general?"

"Superheroes. People who joined the Alliance because we-. We wanted to help."

"There's nothing stopping you from doing that on your own initiative. Fury… Isn't going to be available as a trainer for a while, but if you're interested I can have a word with Alpha Centurion. But I suggest that for now you just get on with normal life."

I send another message to the Pax Romana, to go with those of everyone else I've resurrected. These people got Anti-Lifed, died and when they got back up they still wanted to get back to it. Just looking for a little guidance.

"I'll take you back now."
 
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Balewa crouches down, holding his hands out towards the Lazarus Pit like a man warming his hands on a fire

Well he is all about life and this thing can being people back to life, so it fits.


Remove "my"

"I am afraid that is not possible." Dr. Balewa pulls his hands in and stands up. "The bodies of all of those who died while they were exposed to the Anti-Life, their bodies were not purified. Restoring them to life would not be safe

Hopefully they ended up in a corrdct afterlife instead of going to Hell due to guilt.

"I don't need to. I'm doing it because I don't want Missus Hall to feel guilty

Well it might help, but not completely.

Yes, the ones that were harmed are okay, but that doesn't change the fact that they were killed with her hands, so she may still need therapy.

before recreated her costume around her. It's a bit basic -a wet suit with a logo

"recreating"

I wince slightly as she pulls at the liquid inside my eyes as she stumbles to her feet

Just because it's not a powerful ability doesn't mean it can't be a useful one.
 
Just because it's not a powerful ability doesn't mean it can't be a useful one.

A minimal amount of water around the mouth and nose can cause panic as well as drown a person, you could also make it look like someone wet themselves or cause them to slip under the right circumstances.
 
6th March 2013
03:15 GMT -5


Dr. Balewa crouches down, holding his hands out towards the Lazarus Pit like a man warming his hands on a fire.

"There are not many of these places in the world."
Which is probably a good thing, being that they're alchemical aberrations. Though it may well be saturated with the same energies he can channel as an Enlightened wizard. Not that it stopped Ra's Al Ghül from abusing their power.

I nod. "And?"

"Your surmise was correct. The site is rejuvenated and can be used again. But I am not convinced thet this is the best use for it."
...Wait, the White Event (if you'll pardon the phrasing) reactivated all the Lazarus pits worldwide? That could be troublesome.

"We can resurrect maybe… Thirty people? How would you make that choice?"

"I would not. I am not God."
I mean, how would you select them? Value to humanity? Personal connections? At least money isn't likely to be a factor...

I nod. "Zauriel?"

"I am reminded of the Book of Job. Though the absence of those we love may be painful, the Lord of Hosts does not promise that the universe of His creation will be free from strife. These are tests for mortals to endure in life, with the certainty that it is in His holy realm that a full accounting will be made."
Ah, yes. Since OL has had issues with making use of Lazarus pits before...

"But you can't see any reason why this would cause any sort of demonic problem?"

"That is not the sole metric by which you should evaluate your actions, but no. That will not happen here. Those who died were heroic Christians, and their souls are moving towards unification with the Most High."
Which might invite reprisals from the Silver City, again.

"And no one is going to throw a wobbler about this?"

Zauriel shakes his head. "No. A delay of a few decades is not offensive to the divine order. But even by your standards, I am not sure that their lives are more worth saving than others who have died. If it were my choice, I would give the damned a second chance, having seen the consequences of their decisions."
Well, at least those in charge are being more sensible about it.

"I am afraid that is not possible." Dr. Balewa pulls his hands in and stands up. "The bodies of all of those who died while they were exposed to the Anti-Life, their bodies were not purified. Restoring them to life would not be safe."

"That is unfortunate."
Awkward. No guarantee it wouldn't still be lingering, after all, and no knowing if it'd be infectious.

"You're sure that the Kings won't have a problem with it?"

"Unlike you, we accept the nature of the universe. That includes things that may temporarily remove things from the Lord's loving embrace. But have you reflected upon your own motives?"
Ah, still trying to moderate OL's more outrageous moral decisions, eh?

"I don't need to. I'm doing it because I don't want Missus Hall to feel guilty."

"And not the minor divine Tisiphone?"
Pfft, sod her. If she wasn't so kill-crazy, they wouldn't need to be doing this.

"Gosh, no. She could do with feeling more guilt. Might make her hesitate more before killing people for what they were because someone mind controlled them."

Zauriel nods slowly. "Yes. Guilt can be a powerful tool for moral education."
As many a good mother can prove.

I turn towards Dr. Balewa. "Doctor, this hit me in the face earlier." I take the pie dish out of subspace and offer it to him. "Can you use it to track where Olympus is, and where Themyscira is?"

He moves it around in his hands, studying it carefully.
Ah, good thinking, OL. For once.

"No. The sudden removal of the Anti-Life and its replacement with the White Light has caused an upheaval in the thaumosphere. The old paths between realms are no longer stable or secure. Once things are calmer, then I can use it to track the gods of the Hellens."

"Okay, thank you, keep it with you until then. I'll go and-. Go and get permission from the next of kin to attempt the resurrections."
Which might be why the Olympians haven't returned yet... There's no safe road to travel.

6th March 2013
17:34 GMT +5


The young woman flails at me as I use a construct to pull her newly-reanimated body out of the pit. Empathic vision shows… Her mind is intact but confused, which is perfectly in-line with expectations. There isn't much point in trying to get through to her while the initial shock wares off a little, and… There isn't much that she could do to me. 'Naiad' has a small water-manipulation ability, most likely as a result of non-human heritage, but she's only ever been able to move relatively small volumes at not particularly high pressure. Honestly, she could do more working as a leak inspector for the Greek water authority, but if she wants to be a superhero then I suppose that I would be a bit of a hypocrite to tell her not to.
On the other hand, if the young lady's powers can extend to blood inside someone's body... And you don't know how interactions with the White Light or the Lazarus Pit have affected her abilities...

Perhaps this experience might make her reconsider.

I deposit her on the solid ground at the side of the now-exhausted pit and use my rings to remove as much of the residue as possible before recreating her costume around her. It's a bit basic -a wet suit with a logo sprayed on- but with a little luck the point of familiarity will encourage her to realise where she-.
I presume the original was rather.. damaged by her encounter with Tisiphone.

I wince slightly as she pulls at the liquid inside my eyes as she stumbles to her feet. I can keep it in place using my rings but there's a slightly delay and it feels really weird. Blinding suspects by making their eyes explode is discouraged in Justice League rules of engagement, but is not technically forbidden. I just don't do it to other people because I have better options, but for a water-manipulator it's distracting and makes it hard to see.
Okay, yes, she can affect fluids inside people's bodies. Nasty. Or potentially embarrassing, depending on which fluids she can control. A sudden loss of bladder control as the contents force their way out, for example.

A flash-bang would still be better.

"Naiad? Are you there?"
But cause more lasting damage, I suppose.

She's staring at me, not quite seeing but not looking particularly happy with the situation.

"Naiad?"
Still coming to her senses, eh? At least the sort of madness Ra's always suffered from isn't present. Though that may be a function of age.

"Gwuh..?" The water in my eyes stops moving and her eyes become a little more focused. Good. "Wha..?"

"You were rather badly injured, and-."
Lowballing it for her own ease of mind, eh?

"Fury! She wanted to know where Alpha Centurion is! She's going to kill him!"

"Thank you for the warning. You'll be pleased to know that the evil spirit that was controlling Fury has been removed and everyone is safe. You're the last to recover."
Busy day, and quite a few Pits de-powered again, I see.

She stares for a moment, then reaches up to feel her neck.

"We fixed that. You should be fine, but if you feel any remaining injuries, let me know."
Heh. Joy of being worked on by a Lantern.

Zauriel was right. All of the resurrections went off without issue. Which I suppose means that I can assume that we can use these on non-damned monotheistic people.

Naiad looks around. "Where are we?"
...Until OL can get in touch with his underworldly contacts and make arrangements on that front.

"The Russian Federation." I transmute the material of the pit into soil. "Don't worry, I can take you home in a few moments. Your parents are expecting you."

"Okay. But… What happens now? I mean-. You know, right?"
Taking no chances, I see. Leaving no pit usable behind you.

"To Greece, or the world in general?"

"Superheroes. People who joined the Alliance because we-. We wanted to help."
It was a nice idea. Just a pity it got subverted from within.

"There's nothing stopping you from doing that on your own initiative. Fury… Isn't going to be available as a trainer for a while, but if you're interested I can have a word with Alpha Centurian. But I suggest that for now you just get on with normal life."

I send another message to the Pax Romana, to go with those of everyone else I've resurrected. These people got Anti-Lifed, died and when they got back up they still wanted to get back to it. Just looking for a little guidance.

"I'll take you back now."
Every one of them wants to continue the good work? They're got courage if nothing else.

Unexpected coda to the Fury situation, but I can see OL being determined to make things right for a friend... And the world could use more heroes right now, especially those with abilities that lend themselves to reconstruction efforts.I doubt the Alliance as it was could be rebuilt, but something else might emerge to replace it. Preferably with more oversight and investigation...


...then I can use it to track the gods of the Hellens."
...then I can use it to track the gods of the Hellenes."
...but if you're interested I can have a word with Alpha Centurian.
...but if you're interested I can have a word with Alpha Centurion.
 
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I doubt the Alliance as it was could be rebuilt, but something else might emerge to replace it. Preferably with more oversight and investigation...

Something like an Unlimited Justice League, perhaps.


(Also, you've got the white text color from the Doc's quotation marks bleeding into your text.)
 
"No, No, it's…" I shake my head, looking over to the police officers guarding the ward where Dr. Cuvier is recovering from his overdose.
'No, no, it's…'?
and since they were overwhelmingly from demographic groups disproportionally inclined to commit crimes relative to the general population it's hardly surprising that the crime rate was similarly elevated."
According to my dictionary, 'disproportionately'.

Glad to see some resurrection. I wondered if he's been scared off by the previous difficulties with it.
 
Reconstruction (Renegade option, supplementary)
6th March 2013
22:21 GMT


I pull open the door to-

"Are you looking for a book?"

-a reading room off the library of Queen Triskele's domain.

Hm.

The man in front of me has pale skin and black hair, slightly receding. He's wearing a well-tailored black suit, jacket open and showing a white silk shirt beneath. He's holding…

Ah.

"Yes. That one."

"It's a good read." He closes it and looks at the front cover. The other books on the bookcase next to him don't look disturbed. He knew what he was looking for in advance. "'The Expunged Memories of Children?' That's not something that most demons would trouble themselves with."

"Oh, how clever you are. Clearly it has some particular value to me." He raises his eyebrows very slightly. "I'm not in the mood for messing about. What do you want in exchange?"

"Direct." He looks mildly upset, and walks away from the bookshelf where their mother hid their memories and sits behind a desk decorated with the spine of a snake, bones wrapped around the edge of the upper surface. He lays the book under his right hand, fingers drumming on the leather. His left rests on what looks like a human skull. "I was hoping for something a little more thought-provoking."

"I've been here for five days. Nothing about Hell recommends it to me and I really just want to get this over with."

"It's not really supposed to recommend itself to you. If it does then we're doing something wrong."

I nod. "True. So?"

He tightens his grip on the skull, tilting it and then tapping the jaw against the table three times. "What do you know about demon society?"

"It's a brutal bastardocracy with as much order as the people with the most power choose to impose. There appear to be certain built-in limitations on the locals -the no lying on contractual issues thing is mildly surprising- but that's a matter of the structure of the demons' own magic rather than a sign of actual morals."

"But what's it all for, do you think?"

"Hell? Demons? Let's see…" I frown. "As the New God of Conquest, I'd say that the realm is monstrously inefficient at achieving any purpose. As such, what it's for cannot be any particular end. As an educational example of how not to do things, it fails because few people can actually see what goes on and are instead forced to rely on rumours and ancient texts of dubious authenticity. I am aware that demons are alleged to like the setup and find beauty in it, so I suppose it could be an installation art piece where the audience are the participants. And of course the dull option of a place of punishment for the souls that have done something to offend the Source. Or perhaps it doesn't really have one and the people confined to it are just doing whatever."

Something about that provokes a smile.

"Inefficient?"

"Souls don't last, torn apart for parts or just falling apart when overstressed. Demons are inevitably short-sighted people more dependent on mortal stupidity than really being capable of corrupting someone who wasn't heading that way anyway, and they both love and hate the place by turns. If it was up to me I'd just tear the whole place down."

"It's been tried. Hell was reopened by popular demand."

"Turfing everyone out isn't tearing it down, it's inflicting it on other people. No, no, if you've decided that the point is to tempt the souls you don't want in Heaven into disqualifying themselves, don't keep them around to slowly break them into parts. Just get rid of them."

"Render them down straight away?"

"What are you making machines for? Making artefacts for? Home improvements? In Hell? Please. Frankly, it looks like Hell is over-staffed to me. There aren't so many summoners that you really need more than… What, a few thousand Succubae? And they're the popular sort of demons. Half that many financial specialists, and then a mere handful of other classes, focusing on the most powerful and flexible. Everything else can just be expunged from the universe at essentially no loss."

"I see you've got plenty of ideas."

"Oh, and communications. If you want to let anyone who feels like getting damned get damned then you need to get the word out. As it is, most of the people who would take a deal can't make direct contact."

"The sort of people who would make a deal would be coming here anyway."

"Right, but they might wise up as time goes on. Better to get things on paper. And speaking of paper, have you finished with that book?"

"This?" He picks it up one-handed. "How would you like to make a deal?"

"I would like to make a trade, but I suspect that you're talking about something more complex."

"Humans can be impressive innovators. I've never had a New God down here. Are you as creative as they are?"

"Within my domain, no. I'm not creative, I just do it right. Outside of my domain, it varies. Are you going somewhere with this?"

"Have you heard of 'outsourcing'?"

"In theory, it means a company contracting specialists to deal with a subject outside of their core competency. The idea is that a company that has focused on something can do a better job than someone for whom it's only a part of their job."

"You disagree?"

"It's a question of motivation. If they make a mess of things and your company collapses, they can shrug, walk away and say 'got your money'. Someone who works for your company directly can't. Or, at least, can't as easily."

He nods. "Are you a gambling man?"

"No."

"Alright." He lays the book down and pushes it slightly towards me. "A deal, then. I will give you this right now. You can even use it on your children if you want. No payment up front."

"That sounds pretty darn dodgy."

"In return, you become Hell's efficiency consultant."

"No."

"You should hear me out."

"I have a job and a life and my nature won't let me deliberately half-arse it. You're trying to give me a job that is probably literally impossible."

"But you'd take it for a time."

Hm. Would I?

"I'd want to see a written contract, with deliverables and end point clearly stated. But yes, I think I would. If the Source had an actual problem with this place existing, then it wouldn't exist."

He smiles, and offers me his right hand. "Then we have a deal."

"Written. Contract. Oh, First of the Fallen."

"Glad to see that you're on the ball." He pulls his hand back but leaves the book in place. "I think you'll fit in fine."
 
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the a reading room off the

"the reading room of the"


"You're"


Remove the " at the end.

Written. Contract. Oh, First of the Fallen."

So that's who this is.

When he described him I was drawing a blank, but now I remember that that's how he looked when he first met Constantine.

Guess I mostly remember his whole Conan with cape look.
 
Well that's certainly a way to make new enemies and keep yourself busy.

Darkseid would probably be fine with one of his sons is taking a crack at dominating the afterlife though he wouldn't be satisfied until all afterlife realms are subjugated.

Demons will definitely fight Grayven on this, do you think that angels would try to intervene?
 
but that's a matter of the structure of the demons own magic rather than a sign of actual morals."
'demons''?
and they both love and hate the place by turns If it was up to me I'd just tear the whole place down."
'turns. If'
If they make a mess of things and your company collapses, then can shrug, walk away and say 'got your money'.
'they can just'
If the Source had an actual problem with this place existing, then it wouldn't exist."
I'm surprised that he cares about what the Source thinks. Is this a result of his New God memories or is he pretending?

Interested to see where this Hell business goes. I quite like Hell.
 
6th March 2013
22:21 GMT


I pull open the door to-

"Are you looking for a book?"
...Goodness, the Renegade's been here this whole time? I though once he had the Succupire's mother dominated, he'd be right on top of matters, or at least step back. I shudder to imagine the trail of devils left behind him after applying corrections when they tried to stop him, though.

-the reading room off the library of Queen Triskele's domain.

Hm.
I doubt there's much pornographic material, though. The ladies probably get enough of that sort of thing when they're working. Maybe some technical manuals, hmm?

The man in front of me has pale skin and black hair, slightly receding. He's wearing a well-tailored black suit, jacket open and showing a white silk shirt beneath. He's holding…

Ah.
...Oh, dear. Something that close to human-baseline is either very old, very powerful, or both. Take care, Renegade, I think you've gotten the attention of someone very high in rank.

"Yes. That one."

"It's a good read." He closes it and looks at the front cover. The other books on the bookcase next to him don't look disturbed. He knew what he was looking for in advance. "'The Expunged Memories of Children?' That's not something that most demons would trouble themselves with."
...And he knows why you're here. That's even worse, because now he has leverage.

"Oh, how clever you are. Clearly it has some particular value to me." He raises his eyebrows very slightly. "I'm not in the mood for messing about. What do you want in exchange?"

"Direct." He looks mildly upset, and walks away from the bookshelf where their mother hid their memories and sits behind a desk decorated with the spine of a snake, bones wrapped around the edge of the upper surface. He lays the book under his right hand, fingers drumming on the leather. His left rests on what looks like a human skull. "I was hoping for something a little more thought-provoking."
Ah, the unique aesthetics of Hell... A subtle reminder of who nominally rules this demense, eh?

"I've been here for five days. Nothing about Hell recommends it to me and I really just want to get this over with."

"It's not really supposed to recommend itself to you. If it does then we're doing something wrong."
...I hate to say it but he does have a point. It would take a truly cracked mind to enjoy this place.

I nod. "True. So?"

He tightens his grip on the skull, tilting it and then tapping the jaw against the table three times. "What do you know about demon society?"
I'd be wary of him trying to subtly cast a spell, but he can no doubt feel the fortress-like nature of the Renegade's metaphysique.

"It's a brutal bastardocracy with as much order as the people with the most power choose to impose. There appear to be certain built-in limitations on the locals -the no lying on contractual issues thing is mildly surprising- but that's a matter of the structure of the demons own magic rather than a sign of actual morals."

"But what's it all for, do you think?"
Honestly, that implies it was made. For a purpose, rather than simply growing up from a crack in the universe where a certain someone landed.

"Hell? Demons? Let's see…" I frown. "As the New God of Conquest, I'd say that the realm is monstrously inefficient at achieving any purpose. As such, what it's for cannot be any particular end. As an educational example of how not to do things, it fails because few people can actually see what goes on and are instead forced to rely on rumours and ancient texts of dubious authenticity. I am aware that demons are alleged to like the setup and find beauty in it, so I suppose it could be an installation art piece where the audience are the participants. And of course the dull option of a place of punishment for the souls that have done something to offend the Source. Or perhaps it doesn't really have one and the people confined to it are just doing whatever."
As if the whole place were some sort of gigantic role-playing game session? :V Damnation, the MMORPG that will consume your soul!

Something about that provokes a smile.

"Inefficient?"
To be fair, having it be efficient would probably attract reprisals from its enemies, such as the Silver City. Sort of a 'if it's running well, it's too dangerous!'

"Souls don't last, torn apart for parts or just falling apart when overstressed. Demons are inevitably short-sighted people more dependent on mortal stupidity than really being capable of corrupting someone who wasn't heading that way anyway, and they both love and hate the place by turns If it was up to me I'd just tear the whole place down."

"It's been tried. Hell was reopened by popular demand."
You mean when Lucifer cast away the key and it went to Remiel and Duma? No, that was just him being dramatic.

"Turfing everyone out isn't tearing it down, it's inflicting it on other people. No, no, if you've decided that the point is to tempt the souls you don't want in Heaven into disqualifying themselves, don't keep them around to slowly break them into parts. Just get rid of them."

"Render them down straight away?"
Especially since they may end up gaining redemption before they crumble. And then all you've done is waste your time and theirs.

"What are you making machines for? Making artefacts for? Home improvements? In Hell? Please. Frankly, it looks like Hell is over-staffed to me. There aren't so many summoners that you really need more than… What, a few thousand Succubae? And they're the popular sort of demons. Half that many financial specialists, and then a mere handful of other classes, focusing on the most powerful and flexible. Everything else can just be expunged from the universe at essentially no loss."
Unless someone is building an army, in which case, their unit selection is rather haphazard. Like they're stuck rolling on random tables or opening Gacha packs.

"I see you've got plenty of ideas."

"Oh, and communications. If you want to let anyone who feels like getting damned get damned then you need to get the word out. As it is, most of the people who would take a deal can't make direct contact."
I'm sure if you learned to take advantage of more modern methods than books, you'd have plenty of takers.

"The sort of people who would make a deal would be coming here anyway."

"Right, but they might wise up as time goes on. Better to get things on paper. And speaking of paper, have you finished with that book?"
Yes, pleasant little discussion, but I rather imagine the Renegade wants to get home.

"This?" He picks it up one-handed. "How would you like to make a deal?"

"I would like to make a trade, but I suspect that you're talking about something more complex."
...And exploitably long-term. Best to make sure whatever he offers, you get the book in advance, Renegade.

"Humans can be impressive innovators. I've never had a New God down here. Are you as creative as they are?"

"Within my domain, no. I'm not creative, I just do it right. Outside of my domain, it varies. Are you going somewhere with this?"
Ah, is someone looking for an outside perspective to find new options?

"Have you heard of 'outsourcing'?"

"In theory, it means a company contracting specialists to deal with a subject outside of their core competency. The idea is that a company that has focused on something can do a better job than someone for whom it's only a part of their job."
Though it does have its risks, specialising like that. For instance, if your field of expertise is invalidated suddenly, by a technological upheaval or something...

"You disagree?"

"It's a question of motivation. If they make a mess of things and your company collapses, then can shrug, walk away and say 'got your money'. Someone who works for your company directly can't. Or, at least, can't as easily."
I mean, you could offer a percentage as payment. The better they do, the better their pay. It does encourage competence.

He nods. "Are you a gambling man?"

"No."
Not with important things, anyway.

"Alright." He lays the book down and pushes it slightly towards me. "A deal, then. I will give you this right now. You can even use it on your children if you want. No payment up front."

"That sounds pretty darn dodgy."
Yeah, find out what the catch is, because this sounds like so much bait...

"In return, you become Hell's efficiency consultant."

"No."
Yeah, no way in Hell, if you'll pardon the phrasing. That's a poisoned chalice large enough to drown Galactus.

"You should hear me out."

"I have a job and a life and my nature won't let me deliberately half-arse it. You're trying to give me an job that is probably literally impossible."
You know the phrase about herding cats? That's doable. Herding Demons? Who will look for every opportunity to stab you in the back? Madness.

"But you'd take it for a time."

Hm. Would I?"
Make sure you have clear and obtainable exit conditions. No open-ended commitments, no 'when it's done' clauses.

"I'd want to see a written contract, with deliverables and end point clearly stated. But yes, I think I would. If the Source had an actual problem with this place existing, then it wouldn't exist."

He smiles, and offers me his right hand. "Then we have a deal."
Huh. How stupid do you think he is, mister?

"Written. Contract. Oh, First of the Fallen."

"Glad to see that you're on the ball." He pulls his hand back but leaves the book in place. "I think you'll fit in fine."
Ah, it figures. A God messing about in his domain would definitely get his attention.

Well, it looks like the Renegade is starting his version of the Hell Side-quest now. Although he's going into it much smarter, rather than blundering through like the SI has. Let's hope the big guy is okay with him working part-time on it, though, since the Renegade has many commitments as it is. On a funnier note, I can't help but hear the First's voice like 'Saint's Row's Satan... :p
 
To be fair, having it be efficient would probably attract reprisals from its enemies, such as the Silver City. Sort of a 'if it's running well, it's too dangerous!'

Yeah, look at what happened in the paragon side.

I'm sure if you learned to take advantage of more modern methods than books, you'd have plenty of takers.

First: Use the internet? Are you mad?! Do you have any idea how much of a toxic cesspool that thing is?! Several of my most experienced and cruel demons quit after reading several comment sections concerning an all-female sports team! We can't compete with the sheer spite your kind has and I don't want to see us try! I have standards! We might have helped create social media but we will not use it!
 

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