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Cosmos Quest (Naruto/Lupin III)

I did like that P.S.

[X] Survival, I assume, is a lot like woodscraft?
We should be as tricky to track down in a forest (or a plain, or a tundra, or a mountain...) as we are in a city.
[X] Weaponry, like guns? Yay guns! Or blowdarts, or poison rings with pokey bits, or other sneaky stuff.

[X] Both of them have been comparing stories, and now they want to know; how the hell do you keep picking locks and getting away with it? How do you make seals just not work?!
Finally!


Also: Damn it guys, now Sakura isn't a thing! All those book smarts we could have used!
 
[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

[X] Both of them have been comparing stories, and now they want to know; how the hell do you keep picking locks and getting away with it? How do you make seals just not work?!
 
[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

[X] Sasuke has full access to the wealth of the Uchiha clan - he can amply afford to join Menka's kenjutsu lessons with Ami. If he can stand her longing looks and stay out of the way of her devil-blade.


Might as well double up on weaponry, set up Ami and Sasuke, and see if in doing so Sasuke will toss us a manual or two on Tessenjutsu.

Genjutsu with Memory Palace assist includes Hinata's notes, right? Really wish I had remembered Memory Palace could have been used to memorize that.
 
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[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

[X] Sasuke has full access to the wealth of the Uchiha clan - he can amply afford to join Menka's kenjutsu lessons with Ami. If he can stand her longing looks and stay out of the way of her devil-blade.
 
[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

[X] Sasuke has full access to the wealth of the Uchiha clan - he can amply afford to join Menka's kenjutsu lessons with Ami. If he can stand her longing looks and stay out of the way of her devil-blade.
 
[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

Will choosing the seal lock-picking item enhance that skill or just pass it on to Ami and Sasuke?
 
[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

[X] Sasuke has full access to the wealth of the Uchiha clan - he can amply afford to join Menka's kenjutsu lessons with Ami. If he can stand her longing looks and stay out of the way of her devil-blade.
 
Fear my mind of boredom! Fear it!

Dear walking corpse and my biggest paycheck ever, currently going by the name Itachi.

Oh how are you today Itachi-san? Dreadful weather we're having. Would you like me to send on a message to your surviving family? Just awful what happened to them, barbaric really. Recently it has come to my attention that your manners have been severely lacking. So, as to properly instruct you upon your ill begotten manners, I have wrote you this letter filled with the following advice.

Point one, When you are eating at any establishment, place, or anywhere in general, remember to eat with your elbows on the table, and to use your fingers.

Point two, when one finishes with doing their business, it is of the utmost importance that you Never, and I do mean Never, wash your hands afterwards. Nor should one ever wipe for whatever reason.

Thirdly, when one Kill Steals, they are bound by right of the Bro-code. (whatever the hell that is.) The Bro-code states quite clearly, that a Kill-stealer owes the one they stole from a drink. So, I'll owe sakkun a drink when were old enough.

Lastly, it is considered most very rude when one does not respond to a young ladies letters. Why, it's almost such a slight one could declare a duel of such a thing and kill one over! How utterly horrible isn't it? My it would be such a shame.

Sincerely,

Ino the Fifth.

P.S. Ami called you a Scum-sucking Sea Cucumber. Whatever that is.
 
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[X] Intro to Genjutsu (Memory Palace)
[X] Intro to Taijutsu

[X] Both of them have been comparing stories, and now they want to know; how the hell do you keep picking locks and getting away with it? How do you make seals just not work?!

Aww, I hope Sakura didn't drop out. Actually, how likely is that, considering that she comes from a shinobi family?
 
Damm I knew you said we should interact with her but uh..events and stuff...
But then its just the Second day and she may simply be Ill *hope*

[X] Intro to Genjutsu
[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.


[X] Both of them have been comparing stories, and now they want to know; how the hell do you keep picking locks and getting away with it? How do you make seals just not work?!
 
[X] Intro to Genjutsu [Memory Palace Assist]

[X] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst.

[X] Both of them have been comparing stories, and now they want to know; how the hell do you keep picking locks and getting away with it? How do you make seals just not work?!

[X] Find out what's up with Naruto. He was always an oddball, but he's a lot louder now. What's his deal?
 
I am back. I think.

[X] Intro to Genjutsu

[X] Sasuke has full access to the wealth of the Uchiha clan - he can amply afford to join Menka's kenjutsu lessons with Ami. If he can stand her longing looks and stay out of the way of her devil-blade.
 
[14] Intro to Genjutsu - R.A.G. - Vindictus - Pipeman - hunter09 - dar - Hymn of Ragnarok - Emral282 - nightblade - Jans - Balatro Philologus - Selias - Scia - crazyfoxdemon - Jiven
(Heavily favored for the memory palace assist, is in fact the only thing mentioned for such by anyone)

[-] Intro to Ninjutsu

[1] Taijutsu - Selias

[1] Survival - Guile

[1] Weaponry - Guile

[12] Tutoring Ami in Handseals and Trapmaking, her two worst subjects. In exchange, she'll be willing to tutor you in Weaponry, her best subject and your worst. - R.A.G. - Vindictus - Pipeman - hunter09 - dar - Hymn of Ragnarok - Emral282 - nightblade - Jans - Balatro Philologus - Scia - crazyfoxdemon




[-] More parkour. Stamina's the one advantage you could conceivably have over Itachi, level it up for all you're worth.

[9] Both of them have been comparing stories, and now they want to know; how the hell do you keep picking locks and getting away with it? How do you make seals just not work?! - R.A.G. - Vindictus - Pipeman - hunter09 - Guile - dar - Selias - Scia - crazyfoxdemon

[5] Sasuke has full access to the wealth of the Uchiha clan - he can amply afford to join Menka's kenjutsu lessons with Ami. If he can stand her longing looks and stay out of the way of her devil-blade. - Hymn of Ragnarok - Emral282 - nightblade - Balatro Philologus - Jiven



Write in:
[1] Find out what's up with Naruto. He was always an oddball, but he's a lot louder now. What's his deal? - crazyfoxdemon



Figured I'd count the votes before deciding, then realized it's already pretty clearly defined.

Only reason I see to have anything to do with Naruto at any point in the future is if Hinata starts actually crushing on him. She's a sweet girl, but she'll need a lot of help getting that kid to shape up and be a decent boyfriend.
 
Selias said:
Aww, I hope Sakura didn't drop out. Actually, how likely is that, considering that she comes from a shinobi family?

Well, her parents are soft-hearted enough that if she didn't want to be a ninja they wouldn't kick up a fuss. But in the end, I decided on a more elegant solution based on headcanon.

The class we see in the manga is one of over a dozen in the graduating year; Konoha's a mid-sized city, and it makes no sense that its Ninja Academy wouldn't try to benefit from that, seeing as it appears to be larger than a few of the other big five villages that we see.

So my answer is a little system invented in the post-WWII era called 'tracking'. Based on marks and other factors, the Konoha Ninja Academy will shift some kids into new classes at the beginning of each year. The class Ino is in is stacked with clan heirs, spares, people with a generation or two of ninja behind them, and people with specialized talents that aren't ordinarily part of the curriculum but which can't go ignored, like Ami's facility with chakra flow. This is a practical way to make sure the people who are likely to make up the Konoha equivalent of the officer class all know one another from childhood and know how to work together.

The only-three-teams-on-average-end-up-becoming-genin thing I've reinterpreted as 'only three teams, on average, manage to get apprenticed to a jounin'. The rest go back to the academy to try again or join the more general pool of graduates, who are tasked with desk jobs and D-ranks without a badass mentor to guide them. Sakura is still going to be a ninja, she just likely won't be a punchy one.

Does that sound okay? I mean, obviously it sounds terribly biased against first-generation shinobi, but this isn't Hogwarts we're talking about here, this is chibi-West Point in a military dictatorship that depends on the clans for support.
 
Yeah, I never got the whole 'We're going to teach you enough of the basics that you could, in theory, become super powerful on your own, then we're going to turn 2/3 of you loose on the world to do as you please' plot.

I mean, are we even sure that isn't just Kakashi bullshitting? Yeah, he'll say that many fail, but the only person we canonically know of who fails genin candidates is him.

But yea, probably more we don't see.
 
I always remembered it as being that the bell test has a 66% failure rate, until I went back and checked recently.
 
[X] While Lupin and Elan from Sidereal Quest adjourn to the patio to kick back, down some cocktails, and call out unhelpful instructions...

It didn't take either of you long to discover that neither of you can teach worth dick.

"No, you're holding it too tightly," Ami says, yanking the kunai out of your hand. You glower at her as she once again 'demonstrates' in a way that doesn't actually explain what she's doing.

"I still don't see why all of us have to learn to throw stuff," you grumble.

"God, you're lazy," she scowls. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised; you did grow up with Shikamaru, after all. Are you seriously incapable of learning stuff unless you're good at it right away?"

"Maybe?" you offer sulkily. You weren't this mean when you were showing her how nested-trapping works.

"Well, become capable, then! Have a dream about your Goemon-san practicing shurikenjutsu or something, instead of magic rifles."

"There's a way to make those, there has to be."

"Stop talking and throw the damn knife!"

"Fine!" You don't even bother to look as you whip it away.

There is a distant shattering sound.

"... Ami?"

O.O "Yeah."

"Did I just...?"

O.O "Throw a kunai right through Kiba's mom's front window? Yeah. Yeah you did."

You bolt.

Naturally you make it all the way home without getting caught, but that just means Inuzuka Tsume shows up at your house after dinner and lets Mom and Dad know what you did. Stupid nose-based sensors.

They make you apologize to her, and once she leaves you get a lecture from Mom about responsibility and owning up to your actions.

You don't entirely follow. If you had let yourself get caught, wouldn't Dad have been disappointed in you?

Still. You don't like it when Mom is sad, so you promise to be more careful when practicing in future.

She... doesn't seem satisfied by this, and you wonder if somehow you've missed the point of what she was saying.

Eventually, over the course of the school year, your Weaponry marks get better. They aren't great, but you aren't barely getting by anymore, and for that you're thankful.

Ami, with painstaking effort, brings her Handseals average up to an 80, but the best you can say about her Trap-Making is that she's a lot better at taking them apart without setting them off now.

=

[X] Here in the middle of Imagination...

Shahera-sensei kicks so much ass and Genjutsu is awesome.

She starts off with an explanation of how to identify that you're in a genjutsu, and seems delighted when you turn out to have lots and lots of ideas about little details that could tip you off. Then she casts an illusion that turns the classroom into a beautiful garden full of exotic flowers and birds.

When she releases it, she holds up various items she's taken from each of your desks.

That first class is what decides it for you. Before, you wanted to learn about genjutsu because of what Itachi did to you. Now you want to know all about it because it's wonderful, and it deserves better than him.

=

[X] Bridging the Gap

The Byakugan adds a little something extra to Hinata's frown.

"... Ino-chan, you know if you didn't have such good chakra control you could easily permanently paralyze your hand using this method, don't you?"

You laugh. "Aw, it can't be that hard, I've been doing it since I was a baby."

"That story is true? Wait," Sasuke interrupts himself with a sigh, "of course it's true, it's you."

"Is this really that different from what you do, Hinata-chan?" you ask. "I mean, when you push chakra out of your fingers or Ami pumps it into whatever weapon she's holding, do you guys stop and think about how much chakra is too much or too little, or do you just do it?"

"D-don't be ridiculous! This is on a different level from that!" Hee. She doesn't blush as much as she used to, but you seem to have a knack for bringing it out of her. "Only seal masters are supposed to be able to do this kind of thing! Promise me you won't try to do this with a more complicated seal without studying under a seal master first!"

You blink. "I promise. Dad already made me promise that."

"Good," she says, with visible relief. "And Sasuke, please promise me you won't try to learn it until you activate your Sharingan."

"Ino does it without a dojutsu!" he protests.

"But I do have a rare and elusive mimijutsu!" you declare, striking a pose.

"Ano, I don't think that's a word, Ino-chan," Hinata says.

"My ears hear all~!"

"Promise, Sasuke," Hinata says, trying to get you both back on topic.

"... I promise," Sasuke finally says sullenly.

"Well, since that lesson's been put on hold... wanna learn how to get past a normal lock?" you ask.

Hinata gets the basics down quicker than Sasuke, but Sasuke picks it up much faster than would be realistic to expect from someone who can't make their eyes give them a cross-section of the lock.

=

You, Hinata and Ami are walking home from school for a sleepover at your place when you come across Lee-sempai and the older boys in the park.

They aren't all that much older, really, but both of them are taller than him and both of them are fighting him at once. He's fending them off all right, but it looks like it's taking everything he has to do it.

"C'mon!" one of them says. "What about all that tough talk earlier about making it without genjutsu or ninjutsu? If you can't even manage this much, how do you expect to ever be a ninja?"

[X] Go help him fight!

[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract these assholes and get them to go away.

[X] Lee would be crushed if you had to rescue him; he's very big on the whole sempai-protecting-and-guiding-their-kouhai thing. Have faith in your sempai's ability.
 
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[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract one of these assholes and get them to go away long enough for Lee to have a fair match against the other.

- would be ideal. Not sure if this can be done though.


Two bigger kids on roughly even footing with Lee, so he's already punching above his weight class without any help from Gai. Kind of a big deal there. Makes Neji looking down on him seem a bit silly.

Well, more silly anyway. It's always the ones you underestimate that get you in the end after all.
 
These guys are kind of what Ami was in canon; also-rans who pick on people who're even more pathetic than they are to feel good about themselves.

Still impressive that Lee's worked out how to divide his attention between two opponents, though; I don't know of many 8-9-year-olds who could do that.
 
[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract these assholes and get them to go away.
 
[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract one of these assholes and get them to go away long enough for Lee to have a fair match against the other.
 
[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract one of these assholes and get them to go away long enough for Lee to have a fair match against the other.
 
[X] Lee would be crushed if you had to rescue him; he's very big on the whole sempai-protecting-and-guiding-their-kouhai thing. Have faith in your sempai's ability.
 
[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract one of these assholes and get them to go away long enough for Lee to have a fair match against the other.
 
[X] Lee would be crushed if you had to rescue him; he's very big on the whole sempai-protecting-and-guiding-their-kouhai thing. That's why we have to CHEAT, and be SUPER sneaky so he doesn't find out!
 
[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract one of these assholes and get them to go away long enough for Lee to have a fair match against the other.
 
[X] Lee would be crushed if you had to rescue him; he's very big on the whole sempai-protecting-and-guiding-their-kouhai thing. That's why we have to CHEAT, and be SUPER sneaky so he doesn't find out!
 
[X] Make a plan with Ami and Hinata to distract one of these assholes and get them to go away long enough for Lee to have a fair match against the other.

If Lee is going to be a person in the quest he needs to learn that he's our kohai, not the other way around.
 
[X] Playing with the Big Boys Now

"We have to do something," you say, eyes scanning the terrain to best know how to set up your diversion.

KUWABARA INTERRUPT!

"Then what are you standing around for?" Ami says, and picking up a stone from the road, chucks it right at the tallest boy's head.

He drops to the ground a scant second after it hits him, out cold.

You whistle. Note to self: When running away from a pissed-off Ami, serpentine movement is key.

The fight breaks off for a second, and both of the combatants stare at first the passed-out kid and then you three.

"You little-!" the older boy yells, and breaks into a run toward Ami.

He's tackled from behind before he takes more than three steps.

"Did you forget?" Lee asks, panting. "Your opponent is m-"

The boy cuts him off with a punch to the face, and the fight resumes. All sign of formalized structure has disappeared; the Academy doesn't teach a whole lot of grappling, after all.

"Kick his ass, sempai!" you holler.

Lee looks up, shock on his face.

Unfortunately, this leaves him open for the suckerpunch that knocks the wind out of him.

The big kid gets to his feet, panting, and wipes the blood away from his mouth. "Huh. How d'ya like that? Even a freak like you can get fangirls, I guess."

Lee makes no reply, still wheezing, trying desperately to fill his lungs again. It's a terrible sound.

His opponent turns his back on him, and starts trying to wake up the boy Ami knocked out.

Teeth gritted, you slip your tessen out of your sleeve and-

"... don't..."

You stop short.

Lee has propped himself up on his elbow, and is now struggling to sit up.

"... my fight..." he manages, his voice little more than a whisper.

[X] What the hell kind of shinobi of the Leaf stands by while their friend gets pummelled? Ignore his request and open up a can of whup-ass!

[X] Such determination... that stubborn idiot...! Why does he have to be so...?

----------

Okay, explanation here. If you'd jumped right in, you wouldn't have given Ami time to do what her first instinct was, and if you'd cheered Lee on, she would have gotten curious about what exactly you think a kid barely older than you could do to two opponents, and held back.

As it was... well...
 

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