Womb of Calamity
darthcourt10
Well worn.
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2018
- Messages
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MagisterAurelius
You want laughs, kicks and giggles? Just wait until the Cult of the Dark One learns about Mary Maleficus. And if Mary actually helps them out navigate some minor trouble of the day to day kind?
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Miko of the Dark One: "Praise the Dark One! Who's dark mercy knows no bounds! Who has sent the Womb of Calamity Which Bore Her to us in our cries for guidance! Behold the Mother of the Dark One! She who has kept us from defilement! Praise the Mother of the Dark One!"
Rest of the cultists: "Praise the Mother of the Dark One! Hail the Womb of Calamity!"
Jin: Mom? What. The. Fuck. Did. You. Do?
Mary (feeling shocked, mildly insulted yet slightly smug): All I did was stop some sleazebags from taking advantage of that Ta class clutching the teddy bear.
Jin: Waitaminute? Take advantage of? WTF?
Mary: Long story short, a local studio of chucklefucks were trying to recruit her and a couple of others to make some Abyssal porn. After I found out her internal chronometers only went back seven years, I went down to said studio with muggle law enforcement and enlightened said chucklefucks on their very dire legal circumstances.
Jin: So I can't go on a rampage then? I really really want to go a rampage Mom...
Mary: Luckily nothing had happened yet. But just the solicitation was bad enough. At least the idiots retained the email trail that is going to nail a couple of senior Sony executives who funded and ordered this to the wall.
Jin: Huh. Well, now when you kick the bucket I'm gonna have to enshrine something of you here then.
Mary: Wat.
Jin: Seriously, these loons are considered my official worshippers and cult. You have interceded for them on my behalf. Now they've extended faith and prayers to you. Welcome to the Cult of the Dark One Mom.
You want laughs, kicks and giggles? Just wait until the Cult of the Dark One learns about Mary Maleficus. And if Mary actually helps them out navigate some minor trouble of the day to day kind?
-0-
Miko of the Dark One: "Praise the Dark One! Who's dark mercy knows no bounds! Who has sent the Womb of Calamity Which Bore Her to us in our cries for guidance! Behold the Mother of the Dark One! She who has kept us from defilement! Praise the Mother of the Dark One!"
Rest of the cultists: "Praise the Mother of the Dark One! Hail the Womb of Calamity!"
Jin: Mom? What. The. Fuck. Did. You. Do?
Mary (feeling shocked, mildly insulted yet slightly smug): All I did was stop some sleazebags from taking advantage of that Ta class clutching the teddy bear.
Jin: Waitaminute? Take advantage of? WTF?
Mary: Long story short, a local studio of chucklefucks were trying to recruit her and a couple of others to make some Abyssal porn. After I found out her internal chronometers only went back seven years, I went down to said studio with muggle law enforcement and enlightened said chucklefucks on their very dire legal circumstances.
Jin: So I can't go on a rampage then? I really really want to go a rampage Mom...
Mary: Luckily nothing had happened yet. But just the solicitation was bad enough. At least the idiots retained the email trail that is going to nail a couple of senior Sony executives who funded and ordered this to the wall.
Jin: Huh. Well, now when you kick the bucket I'm gonna have to enshrine something of you here then.
Mary: Wat.
Jin: Seriously, these loons are considered my official worshippers and cult. You have interceded for them on my behalf. Now they've extended faith and prayers to you. Welcome to the Cult of the Dark One Mom.