[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[SharkCultist]

Today was a different lesson than usual for beacon academy. They had a guest speaker.

He was old, nobody could tell quite how old because he was also quite large.

If you were to ask Ruby to describe his body she would just say "baymax".

He had a shock of pure white hair and a clean shaven face with a near constant smile along with a very bright pair of green eyes.

You'd be forgiven for thinking he was just someone's sweet old grandpa.

If it wasn't for the hundreds of small nicks and scars all over his hands and arms.

"Welcome class, I will be your guest lecturer today. My name is-

"Santa?!"

"Hoho! I'm afraid not miss Valkyrie. No my name is Marshall Mello. I'm a retired huntsmen and humanitarian worker."

"Oh yeah I think I've heard of you. Kinda. Don't you have a kid who does music?"

"Why yes my granddaughter Enn does do music under the name Mello Melodies, but that's not what we're here to discuss today miss rose. I am here to ask you one simple question. What is the purpose of a Hunter?"

"Kill Grimm!"

"Catch criminals!"

"To serve our kingdoms!"

"To pick up chicks!"

"Incorrect all of you! Especially that last one. See me after class."

"Ah beans."

"No children Hunters exist for a single reason."

He looks at the class and raises his aura, using it to amplify his voice.

"A Hunter exists to help. Nothing more, nothing less."

---

So Marshall is old school. How old? He was teammates with Ozpin two reincarnations ago.

Oz never brought him in on Salem. Not because he didn't trust him but because he was doing far more good in his own then he would getting tied into his shadow cabal shenanigans.

Mallos semblance is the ability to convert body mass into aura. Hence why he's so large (though you won't see him complaining about it).

He's a guy who enjoys as much out of life as he can. And he has a fairly large family. It isn't Arc big but he at least has enough immediate family members to make two sports teams.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Penny is invited by Jaune, Ruby and Yang to watch their favorite old science fiction shows. In 4K. Unfortunately now it's easy to see all the imperfections in the sets, make up, carpeting, the things the crew left behind, outlets, power cords, when the doors don't close properly, bloopers, and so on.

It becomes a bit of a miserable experience since Penny can't help but point it all out. Which kind of ruins the immersion. A lot.

Yes it is inspired by this video:


View: https://youtu.be/yzJqarYU5Io

My childhood's already been destroyed so it wasn't that bad. But for hyper nerds like Jaune and Ruby, it'll be horrible.

 

[SharkCultist]

So I was thinking about Atlas and for some strange reason I get the feeling they're the kingdom with the most patriotic people and holidays.

And I'm just picturing rby waking up one day to Weiss decked out in some kind of super Atlasy outfit and setting up a meal full of stuff they've never heard of and a concerning amount of homemade dust fireworks.

Yang: "What exactly...is this?"

Weiss: "It's a traditional Atlas dish, from back before we were quite as technologically advanced as we are now and had to be much more careful about waste."

Yang: "Nice dodge. But seriously. What the hell is that? Because it's stinking up the common area."

Weiss: "It's a stew made with crispy chittlin, offal, potatoes, and various hot spices in a rich broth made with marrow and a secret ingredient."

Yang: "Weiss I swear to the brothers if I have to grab a dictionary I will beat you with it."

Weiss: "FINE! It's a stew made from blood and bone broth with organ meat and crispy skin strips!"

Yang: "see was that so hard? Also next time cook it outside. Also eew."

Weiss: "I'm sorry THIS is too gross for you? I've seen you eat a burger so greasy it made squishing sounds when you picked it up."

Blake: "yes but everyone eats burgers."

Weiss: "your favorite pizza is pineapple, anchovies, and onion. Nobody puts any stock in your food opinions "

 

[NightDranzer]

Weiss: "your favorite pizza is pineapple, anchovies, and onion. Nobody puts any stock in your food opinions "

Click to shrink...

.......why? just, why? Pineapple pizza alone is great with tomato, cheese and marinara sauce. Anchovies and Onion are great together since their flavours enhance the other; but pineapple and anchovies and/or onions just don't go together. The flavors clash and often take away each other's taste and leaves a weird experience all around.

 

[SharkCultist]

.......why? just, why? Pineapple pizza alone is great with tomato, cheese and marinara sauce. Anchovies and Onion are great together since their flavours enhance the other; but pineapple and anchovies and/or onions just don't go together. The flavors clash and often take away each other's taste and leaves a weird experience all around.

Click to shrink...

Fun fact I've actually seen someone order that pizza before.

 

[cavalal386]

.......why? just, why? Pineapple pizza alone is great with tomato, cheese and marinara sauce. Anchovies and Onion are great together since their flavours enhance the other; but pineapple and anchovies and/or onions just don't go together. The flavors clash and often take away each other's taste and leaves a weird experience all around.

Click to shrink...

Fun fact I've actually seen someone order that pizza before.

Click to shrink...

Funnier fact: i actually got curious and ordered a Pineapple pizza once. didn't find out what the big deal about it was. it wasn't even that bad, wasn't that good either, but still not that bad.
i tried a fish pizza once as well, it was actually quite good, pity i don't remember where i bought it from or if they even sell it anymore.
also a few of the more popular pizza shop near me have onion on their pizzas.

 

[SharkCultist]

Funnier fact: i actually got curious and ordered a Pineapple pizza once.

Click to shrink...

I'm not a fan, but I'm very particular about mixing sweet and savory. 9 times out of 10 it just doesn't work for me.

Also just the idea of hot pineapple is a no for me.

 

[Gur40]

Crack Idea Because Fuck the Retcons
Jaune doesn't know your suppose to turn off your Aura
so he has it on during class, sleep, showers and never feels any drain or strain

It takes til Goodwich mentions it in class and her only reply to the reveal is he is Nick son all right

 

[SharkCultist]

Crack Idea Because Fuck the Retcons
Jaune doesn't know your suppose to turn off your Aura
so he has it on during class, sleep, showers and never feels any drain or strain

It takes til Goodwich mentions it in class and her only reply to the reveal is he is Nick son all right

Click to shrink...

Having his aura constantly up literally has him radiating good vibes into his surroundings.

He becomes like catnip to girls (and dudes with depression)

 

[cavalal386]

i got an idea for a prompt.

Team RW_Y are complaining about Blake's smut. Blake replies "It's not smut!! it's Erotic Literature!!", only for a passerby to overheard her and tell her in no uncertain terms that no it is smut and not just smut, but poorly written smut, and that the only reason it's popular is because of it's big named publisher. before processing to name several far better trashy novels/bodice ripper.

 

[DaJuggernaut]

It's either Velvet, Pyrrha, or for hilarity, Cardin.

 

[dragon_cloud16]

i got an idea for a prompt.

Team RW_Y are complaining about Blake's smut. Blake replies "It's not smut!! it's Erotic Literature!!", only for a passerby to overheard her and tell her in no uncertain terms that no it is smut and not just smut, but poorly written smut, and that the only reason it's popular is because of it's big named publisher. before processing to name several far better trashy novels/bodice ripper.

Click to shrink...

It's either Velvet, Pyrrha, or for hilarity, Cardin.

Click to shrink...

Better suggestion just for the sheer WTF moment that could spawn.

It's all three of them that leads to them actually arguing about which is the better erotic literature/smut novels to read. With Pyrrha having a tendancy about female warriors submitting into becoming the wives of farmers, doctors, or even a simple school teacher.

Velvet is a enjoyer of stories where the women take the men a little forcefully but are still loving and supporting to them.

Cardin's preferences are all about humanxfaunus relationships, usually involving women with rabbit traits.

All the while, Jaune is looking uncomfortable knowing that one of the writers is related to him and the other two are friends of his sister who all use each other as a sounding board. And all three of them use him as their initial beta reader and critic before sending it out to the publisher.

 

[Gur40]

Jaune is just to good at massages

Spoiler: old fanfic joke

---

Ruby learns she's the weakest version of herself in the RWBY VERse
Her profile on FCOC Vs battle wiki
That's not counting Crosstag Ruby or DBRS Ruby or DC Ruby

---

So Sun has a sister and or cousin [books canon is ~]... does she look like FGO version or a saiyan?

Spoiler: FGO Sanzang

or

Spoiler: Saiyan

---

Vtuber Ruby[our world] defending Penny

Spoiler: at Ruby art level

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Written with RedDragonEmpress, a short fun idea: Jaune accidentally summons his ancestor, Jeanne D'Arc of Radian, who destroyed the Witch Queen of Argus. She did this with the help of Ozpin's incarnation at the time, who posed as Ozmas the Wizard.

Unfortunately Jaune managed to get her Alter form. Yes, Jalter!Jeanne is loose.

Jalter: "BURN THE HERETICS!"

Jaune: "But Greatest Grandmama, they're my friends!"

Jaltar: "Then take them as your concubines! That's how we did it in my day!" Raises her flag up high. "Now where is the emerald wizard?! HE OWES ME A NIGHT IN BED!"

Ozpin: "Oh no."

Jaune: "Um, Headmaster?"

Jalter: "YOU CAN'T HIDE FROM ME!"

Ozpin: Already packing his bags. "Mr. Arc, considering this is your fault, I'm leaving you in charge. Let me know when she's gone!"

Jaune: "ME?!"

Jalter: "FOUND YOU~!"

Ozpin: "WITH MY LAST BREATH, I CURSE JAUNE ARC!"

 

[Balorak146]

-snip-

Click to shrink...

Didn't Jalter have a thing going on with Salter?

Shouldn't she be going after Nana Arturia rather than Ozpin?

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Didn't Jalter have a thing going on with Salter?

Shouldn't she be going after Nana Arturia rather than Ozpin?

Click to shrink...

She's gonna have both.

 

[Gur40]

She's gonna have both.

Click to shrink...

Ozpin knows death by Snu-Snu after his first life

Glydna gets a new very traditional boss... but the benefits and smaller workload are apricated

Oscar is confused by he's scared to go to beacon as OZ hides in his subconscious and lives his life farming

Jaune is now engaged to RWBY Pyrrha May and Winter

And any Grimm is burned to ash before they can even reach the walls by the New Headmistress of Beacon and Nana Artoria made damn sure Jalter knows the pecking order in her Royal Harem

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Jaune: "ME?!"

Jalter: "FOUND YOU~!"

Ozpin: "WITH MY LAST BREATH, I CURSE JAUNE ARC!"

Click to shrink...

Glynda - "What in the Table Breaker's name is going on here?!?"

Jalter - "The wizards pelvis belongs to me, Headmistress! You, and your children cannot defeat me before I claim what is rightfully mine!"

Glynda - "I don't have any children!"

Jalter - "A maiden at your age? Really? These are strange times indeed!"

 

[Dragon Bob]

Jaune forced to run Beacon because Jalter will kill anyone who implies her grandson isn't a good choice.
It doesn't help that keeping with magic being all about irony, Ozpin cursing Jaune after being killed via snu snu, means now Jaune attracts dangerous women.

 

[Gur40]

Jaune forced to run Beacon because Jalter will kill anyone who implies her grandson isn't a good choice.
It doesn't help that keeping with magic being all about irony, Ozpin cursing Jaune after being killed via snu snu, means now Jaune attracts dangerous women.

Click to shrink...

Arc Gene [possible Salem gene] Semblance, Blacksmith all using the curse for max grandbabies

 

[SharkCultist]

So what if Weiss went off the rails?

It's well known that church kids, rich kids, celebrity kids and all those when they slip the parental leash usually tend to go wild.

So what if literally the day after initiation Weiss goes full punk?

Leather jacket, steel toe combat boots, pants, and messy wild hair. Everything that would give dear old daddy a heart attack.

Bonus if she keeps flirting with Blake and velvet.

"So a lot of faunus like to say Fuck the Schnee, you wanna give it a try?"

Poor Ruby is gonna get stuck in the middle of team dumpster fire.

 

[Bommel]

And now the idea that Weiss acts all haughty in public, but secretly has taken over a room and turned it into a 'den of cuteness' that her mother knows about along with Winter and Whitely as well as Klein.

Very much willingly by Whitely if it means she doesn't try to force him into a dress like when he was younger.

Click to shrink...

It does really fit with how Jacques basically forced them to adhire to specific PR friendly personas most of the times and didn't tolerate any disobedience (even Weiss' asymmetrical off-center ponytail or braid hairstyle is one of the few quiet acts of rebellion she's able to get away with).

Actually, it makes so much sense that all the other Schnee familly members (not counting Jacques) would also have turned their rooms in their private den of personality and expression, which Jacques doesn't really know about because he never enters their rooms, he always summons them to him (often his office, because he views the whole family like a business and employees.

Willow would be the only one who would have a specific special room ajasent to her bedroom with the only entrance being in her bedroom, because Jacques actually visits her room sometimes to talk to her (he can't order her around like his children, and officially Willow still holds all the shares of the SDC, so actaully ordering her around like a servant/slave could result in a divorce, meaning he'd lose everything, so he has to be more manipulative).
I'd imagine that Willows room would have photos and trinkets from the few happy moments of her children she'd managed to scrape together (which isn't a lot, but it's what she could get), and perhaps some instruments, self-written mustic, messy art tools and artwork Jacques wouldn't aprove of because they don't fit the image (they could even be genuinely good if not brilliant, just not fit the image Jacques wants, which might be the point why Willow speciffically makes that style of art/music).

 

[Gur40]

SNIP
Poor Ruby is gonna get stuck in the middle of team dumpster fire.

Click to shrink...

So Yang wants to be Free of responsibility while also being a mom friend

Spoiler: Yang Flip floping

Blake goes on and on about Faunus Right and has a Human'd kink

Spoiler: Human'd Blake

Weiss goes full Bleiss and goes around talking about being Faunus'd

Spoiler: Punk Weiss

How the rest of Beacon react to Weiss and Blake

Spoiler: Bonk go to jail

---

Is Tumblr actually Right?

Spoiler: making a RWBY character *Trauma*

Name: pick a color
Weapon: add a gun to it
Semblance: pick a trauma

 

[SharkCultist]

So this idea hit me. It's got a bit of Danny phantom and a sprinkle of one or two specific Kamen rider in it. And something secret.

---

He's eight years old when he messes everything up.

He asked his parents to train him again, and again they said no. But this time instead of going to his room and sulking he decided to act out.

There's a HUGE tree out back behind the house, a old oak that's been around almost longer than the family. His mom doesn't like the kids playing near it.

So obviously to spite her he had to climb the damned thing. He'd never been the greatest climber, his stamina is pretty shit, but spite can be a wonderful motivator.

He made it at least seven stories up before the inevitable happened and he fell.

Have you ever heard your own bones break? Jaune has. He heard his liny arms and legs and ribs snap as he slammed into the branches on the way down and he heard his ribs shatter when he hit the ground.

The sound was unpleasant but luckily he couldn't focus on that, unluckily that's because he was in pure agony.

And the cherry on top was landing at his mother's feet.

He was dying. She was using all her skills trying to fix him but she was just dragging it out, he would have screamed at her to stop if he still had the ability.

Finally something changed. She realized she was losing the battle so she switched tactics and awakened his aura. It shouldn't have done much if anything at all but somehow it let her beat out the rate of him dying.

Second by second, inch by inch she dragged him away from the grave.

He spent a year healing after that even with his moms legendary medical skills though part of that was because his body and aura became a bit....odd.

His heartbeat and temperature were 2/3rds under anyone else and he could do things with his aura others couldn't.

He could extend his aura past his body without needing a weapon, he used it to kinda float around a bit or to do tricks for his sister's by making their toys orbit around him.

Whatever that was it wasn't a semblance. They weren't even sure if he had a semblance or if it burned out keeping him alive.

But Jaune knew there was something there, he knew because of the odd feelings with himself. How his aura telekinesis trick felt like something reaching out past from I der his skin, or how the floating felt like it was dragging his body around instead of enveloping it.

He's eleven years old the next time he asks for training and they finally say yes. It feels like blackmail, not a victory.

They almost train him back into the grave. If they can't stop him from risking his life then they'll make him as hard to kill as possible.

He sweeps through the exams to bypass a prep academy before hitting Beacon.

It's always been his dream to attend this school. Beacon academy the home of heroes. It's all looking up, he's somehow stumbled his way into a gorgeous and friendly partner, and they've already almost finished the exam with a pretty big group.

Which is when the big ass scorpion and bird show up and Ruby almost dies to a stinger that Weiss ends up saving her from, unfortunately they both ended up knocked into a tree from the force of its stinger stab hitting Weiss barrier and the hit is hard enough to shatter their auras.

Jaune doesn't want to see death again.

Something in him clicks and for just a second he feels the familiar and dreader sensation of falling again.

Only instead of his body falling he's falling into the back of his own head as something shifts and his aura goes from a sunny yellow to a angry crimson.

To everyone else they watch a much more dramatic change as his hair shifts the a coal black color and his eyes turn a haunting and acidic green color, which is some of the only color left on him as most of it seemed to leech away from his clothes and armor except for a light blue color around his fingertips and on his sword that Weiss was quick to realize was ice.

But if his physical changes seemed extreme they were nothing to the changes to his presence.

A feeling in the air around him of dread, a cold terror that sunk into your bones and made you want to run even though you knew it was pointless.

Jaune chuckled. Like dry dead tree branches rubbing up against each other. Finally he spoke, in a much deeper voice dripping with sarcasm.

"It's good to be alive."

---

Ok so a couple things about this Jaune.

The ghost form is his semblance. It's not quite a full ghost thing like Danny has but it's got some different scarier abilities.

The ghost form is still Jaune but it's all the worst parts of him combined with his trauma and the bulk of his power. It'll still work towards what Jaune wants but not always in a way he would approve of.

For instance he might stop cardin from bullying velvet by attempting to break his neck.

Also if you want to imagine his voice it's literally Dan Phantoms voice.

 

[The Brotherhood of Steel]

For one reason or another Jaques needs an alliance with the Arc family. During the negotiations a deal is struck for an arranged marriage. Not wanting to waste Weiss Jaques forces Winter by taking advantage of her protective nature.



Given time of from the military to get to know him she travels to Beacon and they start to hit things off. The problem is Weiss started having feelings for Jaune after the dance and now that has to either give for him or watch her sister steal him away.

 

[Gur40]

Random Idea For Ports Semblance

---

Ruby being strong but unskilled in hand to hand
from Reddit

Spoiler: Volume 5 BS

-Exciting_Bandicoot16
You forgot to show episode 1 where she bodily tosses a Red Axe member through the shop window.

-AmbivertCollegeGuy

You can tell the writers had no idea of what to do with Ruby in V5 so they gave her a training arc and pretended she didn't toss two of Junior's henchmen out of that shop with punches and kicks in the very first episode.


-Solbuster
Imagine if Ozpin spent that month on training Ruby's silver eyes

Cinder would be immediately cooked(figuratively and literally) in Haven's fight the second she steps out of the portal

MapDesperate7012

That was what I was thinking when I was thinking about Maria's plot relevance! Like, sure hand-to-hand is a useful skill, but when your current biggest threat in the form of Cinder (and possibly the Spring Maiden who was thought to be in Raven's charge at the time) is also weak to the Silver Eyes, you'd think that the either Ozpin or Qrow would help Ruby focus on using that instead of her hand-to-hand, which is pretty much a dump stat at this point.

Honestly, there's…not really a need for Maria considering you have a wizard who's probably worked with dozens of the Silver Eyed warriors as well as an uncle who worked with your mom, who also was a silver-eyed warrior.


-Godzillafan125

I know that lazy attempt to give her a flaw pisses me off to no end

Look I get maybe unskilled in hand to hand just throws or kicks

But with a heavy sniper scythe physically she should be on par with yang able to bench press so a punch shouldn't be limp like first volumes.

It was lazy

Just say say she needs TECHNIQUE like grappling or something not physical strength

---

RK Timetravels but has already solo'd 99% of the problems except Adam and Cinder crew

Spoiler: RK waiting to jump team CEMN and sneak out to MT Glenn

how does this effect Canon? Watts, Hazel and Tryian dead, the Spiders, Tribe and Crown slaughtered with Bram and Leo assassinated

 

[The Brotherhood of Steel]

Jaune is the newest member of the medical staff at Beacon. Because of this as initiation he's given the task of making sure all students and staff are up to date on their shots. This includes those from other academies here for the festival.

Only one problem.

Huntresses are afraid of needles.

This includes powerhouses like Glynda, Velvet, Pyrrha, and Winter.

 

[cavalal386]

Jaune is the newest member of the medical staff at Beacon. Because of this as initiation he's given the task of making sure all students and staff are up to date on their shots. This includes those from other academies here for the festival.

Only one problem.

Huntresses are afraid of needles.

This includes powerhouses like Glynda, Velvet, Pyrrha, and Winter.

Click to shrink...

They will have to choose between a needle, a suppository or, if it's a thing, a patch.

 

[SharkCultist]

Jaune is the newest member of the medical staff at Beacon. Because of this as initiation he's given the task of making sure all students and staff are up to date on their shots. This includes those from other academies here for the festival.

Only one problem.

Huntresses are afraid of needles.

This includes powerhouses like Glynda, Velvet, Pyrrha, and Winter.

Click to shrink...

Cheat like a mother fucker. Give them a liquid medicine that's actually gonna knock them the fuck out so he can work in peace.

 

[Bommel]

For one reason or another Jaques needs an alliance with the Arc family. During the negotiations a deal is struck for an arranged marriage. Not wanting to waste Weiss Jaques forces Winter by taking advantage of her protective nature.



Given time of from the military to get to know him she travels to Beacon and they start to hit things off. The problem is Weiss started having feelings for Jaune after the dance and now that has to either give for him or watch her sister steal him away.

Click to shrink...

It would be even more hilarious if Winter was secretly already married to someone else.

Alternative idea from this; Jacques and the Arcs sign an arranged marriage contract, and Jacques leaves it a bit open ended so that at least one of his daughters needs to marry Jaune, and annulling any previous marriages.
But in his eagerness to marry someone off, he messed up the wording and now Jaune is engaged to all of the Schnee women, including Willow, anulling his own marriage in the process and thus removing him the CEO ot the SDC.
The only way to fix this is if Willow signs something to cancel the terms of that contract, which she absoluely refuses to do now that she has a perfect way out of the abusive relationship with Jacques (Jaune also needs to sign, but that's not relevent as long as Willow is refusing anyway).

Willow is also more than a little exited for the wedding and the consummation of the marriage, partually because of what kind of a middle finger it would be to Jacques, and partually because she has heard rumors about the prowess of the Arcs in the bedroom.