SHINOBI: The RPG - New Game

[aj0413]

But, I mean, I still want to entertain you guys so...I'll figure it out. Thanks for the support.

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Just small reminder:

1) You originally burnt yourself out over this and then explicitly stated that in this re-write and other stories you'd be writing for you, what you like.

2) A character that is perfectly likable or has zero morally questionable or objectionable actions does not exist and it's a characters flaws that help give them depth and interest. It's a large part of why I hate Captain America and Superman (I know, I know, you love that guy) lol ;P

 

[Fulcon]

1) You originally burnt yourself out over this and then explicitly stated that in this re-write and other stories you'd be writing for you, what you like.

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This is true.

2) A character that is perfectly likable or has zero morally questionable or objectionable actions does not exist and it's a characters flaws that help give them depth and interest. It's a large part of why I hate Captain America and Superman (I know, I know, you love that guy) lol ;P

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This is also true.

...no offense taken.

 

[dontenglish]

Not for the first time, I'm thankful for your bastion of sanity.



Thank you very much. I'm glad I was able to show Kakashi as a stable mentor figure. It kind of bugs me how, in most fanfics, he's shown as having learned nothing from his past when, even in Canon the dude was an awesome teacher.



Glad you liked it. Seems, unfortunately, that I've stirred up a bit of a hornets nest here, but that mirrors what happens in the fic, so I guess it's too be expected.



Well, Lee is going to be helping Daisuke search for skill books and I can definitely see suggestions from everyone being a thing. Heck, even Neji might get in on the game.



Going off of what I heard, Boruto.

She still calls him Naruto-kun, tolerates him barely being there to raise their children and I just plain don't like it.



Thank you.



Honestly, I've become more sympathetic to Sakura's...violent tendencies. Naruto's been bothering her for a while and given how forceful he is, trying to tell him nicely just wouldn't cut it. Not that I approve of the violent habit once they become friends but I understand where it comes from.



Thank you for saying so, this gives me something to think about.



I'm not sure I understand. Can you elaborate, please? In my view, this is the first time she's had to deal with real, actual loss, and grown men have been reduced to weeping at the loss of a comrade. Seriously, that entire scene was written with 'Daisuke died' as being the forefront of everyone's minds.



Daisuke left the hospital and returned to the Hotel where everyone was staying, even if they changed room sets. Then the Hokage arrived with the Hyuuga clan patriarch to demonstrate how seriously he took this breech of security. A friggan branch member had been abducted and kept alive in stasis; obviously, the Byakugan was being traded to someone, somewhere.


I disagree, and I will not. The chapter is fine from my point of view.



Thank you.



The time period Naruto is based on extends from 1467 to 1615.

Your earliest example is 1700. 85 years out of date and it's not even the right country.

In Japan, for instance, the age of consent is still 13 (with changes being made depending on the Prefecture).



That depends mostly on the time period.



I didn't use everything in the videos, I made changes for clarity and personal appeal, but it's still highly educational and I recommend watching it.



Mostly true? Hang on, I was trying to show Daisuke being as conscientious as he could in his situation and as respectful to their feelings as well, he could be. I guess I failed?



That's when you start having the individual wives giving each other time so it's not all on the husband. Seriously, it's a large family, placing everyone's emotional support on one person never ends well.



I agree with this.



It's a misconception, I suppose, but it's a rule of the Naruto setting.



I think Hisako's issue was she honestly hadn't expected it. Why? Perspective; she was hyper focused on just getting Daisuke that being forced to share didn't even cross her mind. Like, well, a lack of experience brought by lack of years. But what do I know? I just write the thing.



Exactly. Thank you.



Seems right to me.



I don't know, he just recovered from a near-death experience and was just laying in bed with no expectations. That kind of thing is cause for introspection, I think.

But thanks for the compliment.



We'll see. I don't want to make any promises, but I have a few scenes in mind.



Nah, the naughty bits are going to have to remain in your imagination.



Fuinjutsu. Seals.



I don't keep a current stat sheet on the internet, it's on my computer.

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i have a suggestion once the mc gets his ninjutsu for max the mc should make a seal which seals the ninjutsu which are at a certain area maybe its could be like tomuas imagine breakers but it could also be able to use to release the jutsu which gets touched also another suggestion going to this one I think the mc should make an item which shoots certians jutsus that he chooses beforehand pretty much maybe a gun which shoots ninjutsu where you would instead of sticking a bullet in you would set in a tailsmen with a ninjutsu put in it

 

[Fulcon]

i have a suggestion once the mc gets his ninjutsu for max the mc should make a seal which seals the ninjutsu which are at a certain area maybe its could be like tomuas imagine breakers but it could also be able to use to release the jutsu which gets touched also another suggestion going to this one I think the mc should make an item which shoots certians jutsus that he chooses beforehand pretty much maybe a gun which shoots ninjutsu where you would instead of sticking a bullet in you would set in a tailsmen with a ninjutsu put in it

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I have considered doing this and I may still do so, thank you for your contribution.

Have a cookie.

 

[dontenglish]

I have considered doing this and I may still do so, thank you for your contribution.

Have a cookie.

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also are mc is able to make chakra threads with his control right if so I got a suggestion for a technique so pretty much a one of the ideas I got was he could make a construct out of chakra to control him using chakra threads so that instead of his body relying of int to move it would rely on are chakra control skill to move faster or to just attack faster of course this may damage are selfs from moving faster than what are body should be able to but in time we can get rid of that weakness through plenty of ways such as mastering the wind element to protect us from the backlash from wind another thing he could use his threads for is to make claws by combining the chakra scapel technique an since its made up of chakra the more chakra he has the long the rang of the attack of the claw could be

 

[l---erddad---l]

Oh, it's fun watching people with a moral or emotional objection to this chapter trying to put their objection into logical terms.

(Not that their objection isn't fair, it's just not one that I share)

As for the whiplash...I grew into a different person. Someone who has a better understanding that cultural moors are not necessarily moral moors.

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Just to be clear, neither side feels unrealistic. I definitely think I would be pretty close to the original fic's response, with polygamy feeling skeevy even knowing that it isn't (like, I know polygamists with happy, fulfilling relationships: One of my closer friends, for example). The other side feels real, but it also feels unhealthy: It sounds like Daisuke is responding to the fact that it's likely that he'll be forced to have a harem with indulging in fantasizing in not really healthy ways, but only really skeevy feeling because of how powerful he is and the fact that he COULD try to make it happen. If this is supposed to be anything more than coping strategies for the fact that the choice of having a harem isn't in his hands, its a little weird, but that was how I read it.

 

[Fulcon]

Just to be clear, neither side feels unrealistic.

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Oh definitely. I don't think I could stomach this sort of thing in real life but I'm interested in it all the same.

I definitely think I would be pretty close to the original fic's response, with polygamy feeling skeevy even knowing that it isn't (like, I know polygamists with happy, fulfilling relationships: One of my closer friends, for example).

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Fascinating! Well, any insight you could provide, if you are willing to give it, would be invaluable.

The other side feels real, but it also feels unhealthy: It sounds like Daisuke is responding to the fact that it's likely that he'll be forced to have a harem with indulging in fantasizing in not really healthy ways, but only really skeevy feeling because of how powerful he is and the fact that he COULD try to make it happen

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Two questions.

Number 1, how is it unhealthy, in your view?

Number 2, is it really so bad if he tries to make it happen?

Honest questions, not trying to point fingers or anything.

If this is supposed to be anything more than coping strategies for the fact that the choice of having a harem isn't in his hands, its a little weird, but that was how I read it.

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It was meant to be him trying to cope somewhat with that fact that he nearly died again. He's using the idea of a harem as something to look forward too in order to cope with that fact he almost lost everything, again. Which kind of answers my first question, because I don't think that's healthy.

 

[SebazuD]

Not wrong.

EDIT: Actually, give me a second (apologies, I started this edit after you liked my post).

Why shouldn't it be blatant? Why shouldn't Daisuke consider what he wants out of life and who he wants in his life and in what capacity? You say I'm trying to convince myself or others that it's normal and makes sense and...is that wrong?

I grew up in a culture where bigamy is considered immoral and sexist. I think we all have. Isn't it understandable to try to reassure oneself and the audience that I'm not trying to do something wrong? That I'm not trying to be a bad guy, even if it looks that way to our cultural norms?

I can certainly see an argument for making it less over the top but...I feel like I need it to be over the top for my own conscience. Just to mark a clear division, stating 'we are delving into these themes right now, you have been warned'. The daydream (if you can even call it that) is there for a reason and I feel like it does its job.

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I mean there's nothing wrong with poligamy.
But planning a list of girls the MC has either never met or barely knows for real is when it becomes skivy.

Something a relationship needs to be healthy is equal grounds.

Having someone be superior or be in a position of power in relation to another makes the whole thing extremely fucked up in real life.

So having the MC, who is a fully grown adult, who knows more and can easily manipulate the girls in question as they don't know any better start making a list of all of them and how he'd want to add them to his harem just comes out as being a really amoral and uncaring character. I mean, I though you where trying for a more grounded character.

Anko and Hisako are fine, because Daisuke is actually close to them.

You asked "Why shouldn't Daisuke consider what he wants out of life and who he wants in his life and in what capacity?", right?
It's because he's talking about them as if they are just things to collect and groom to be more to his liking rather than actual people.

Granted, this is fanfiction, and there's nothing wrong about you writing a chracter that gets all the girls, obviously, but it's not gonna change how it comes out to other people.

 

[Galacticplumber]

Okay, simple compromise idea. What if it's an actual wet dream without conscious intent, or any planning? Do we begrudge a boy having hormones?

And on the other side, is that wet dream happening in the same chapter the harem idea gets brought up enough to count for the desired warning?

 

[l---erddad---l]

Two questions.

Number 1, how is it unhealthy, in your view?

Number 2, is it really so bad if he tries to make it happen?

Honest questions, not trying to point fingers or anything.

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Generally speaking, approaching a relationship from a position of power is kind of nasty. It's a way of utilizing that power to take advantage of the other person. Some amount of manipulation is inherent to any relationship, but the way he's thinking about it definitely has a lot of the feeling of him trying to figure out how to use his metaknowledge+power to get what he wants while reducing the autonomy of the other people involved. That's generally considered an immoral action by most philosophical systems (not all, but a fair percentage). That autonomy, the balance of power, is important.

Him diving deep into it in his head, planning years if not decades in advance in such a way that everything is up to him, sounds like a bid for control. Him almost dying makes sense as a trigger, but Daisuke has never felt to me like somebody who is happy that the Hokage can tell him to get a harem and he has to, so he's preempting it by going "I'll do it, but because I decided to do it, not because it got far enough in the timeline that you ordered me to do it". That's fine. It's not a great coping mechanism, but it's fine. If he started actually fully planning it out in such a way that he isn't planning for the possibility of rejection (trying to coax Hinata away from Naruto instead of just getting to know her and making it clear that a relationship is in the cards), so that his plans are to remove the possibility of free action on the parts of others, setting things up so that they have practically no choice but accept his plans, and puts those plans into action... That's the part where he's being a bad person. That's the part where he, to paraphrase old an philosopher, is treating others as a means rather than an end in and of themselves.

 

[paloswag]

So this chapter felt like a "jumped the shark" moment with the harem stuff. It's just radically different than the previous incarnations of the story and gives it a more campy feel. There was a bit of camp in the other work but I felt like overall it was more grounded in a realistic take than what this one seems to be turning into.

Are there any canon, village-sanctioned harems in the series? My main problem with the way most harems are written in fanfiction are that they mainly male-fantasy wish-fulfillment with no basis in reality. Historically yes, powerful people had harems in the past, but it generally didn't work out for most people involved. The wives would attempt to murder each other and their children, succession crises, rival branches of the family, etc. Just a bad idea when trying to run a dynasty. That's not even getting to the social/emotional problems of the harem concept. I can't imagine most men would be okay if their wives had multiple lovers. For me, I know I would feel pretty bad, and the idea that so many women would be okay with being in that same situation plays to that male-fantasy aspect where women are empty-headed objects that don't have any real power. Sure, I could see the possibility of a lot flings with different women in the series, but an actual harem? Why would women(unless they're into that shit) who can shoot fireballs out of their mouths tolerate their spouse fucking other girls? "Oh, he's an alpha chad with a bloodline so a bunch of girls are just going to agree to be in a harem." The cause and effect here is ignoring simpler alternatives. These women could just have a brief, sexual relationship with him and then marry someone who could better attend to their other needs. No need to commit to a clan, or trying to raise a family with a father who has too many kids. And nobody can take care of the emotional/social needs required to maintain and grow so many relationships. And a lot of people would be uncomfortable with you developing a relationship with someone else, because it means less time you could spend with them. All in all, most harem implementations seem to ignore the wants and needs of their female participants, and the way most authors address it are by making the women cock-drunk or by giving them underwhelming motivations.

Maybe shadow clones could help, but that's still super skeezy and weird with a lot of grey area for poorly written rationalizations and sexist assumptions. Hisako's reaction is pretty accurate to what I would expect most women to have. And if she has any self-respect, she'll refuse to be a broodmare.

And I have mixed feelings about the game system reveal. On one hand, so many potential problems and future plot-holes just got solved by revealing the deets. A big pet peeve of mine for SI's and stories in general are when a lot of the conflicts could be solved with a conversation that doesn't happen. On the other hand, it doesn't seem like the reveal had much of an impact. Everyone was just like "okay". I'll wait and see how that plotline expands in the future before having an opinion.

 

[anenymouse]

If nothing else going to the Chunin Exams will expose him to girls of other villages who could potentially defect to Konoha for a good marriage. I mean he put Kaguya on the potential list basically any woman or girl is less ridiculous in comparison. Besides the fact that most girls probably wouldn't be willing to get in a relationship with him let alone joining a harem even civilian girls have feelings too ya know?

 

[NightmareWarden]

edit: does anyone else feel anything about Hisako as a character based on these last two chapters? Anyone strongly disagree with me? Anyone get where I'm coming from, but see other routes going forward for her (if the chapter is not edited)?

I'm not sure I understand. Can you elaborate, please? In my view, this is the first time she's had to deal with real, actual loss, and grown men have been reduced to weeping at the loss of a comrade. Seriously, that entire scene was written with 'Daisuke died' as being the forefront of everyone's minds.

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Okay, so Hisako's emotional reaction immediately after finding a "dying" Daisuke is fine. Pretty much any "crazy" reaction over the next hour could be explained. And she would definitely be distraught 24 hours later while Daisuke's survival is in jeopardy. Her recriminations during the talk with her teammates are fine. Hisako clinging to Daisuke later in the day, reminding herself he's still alive, and allowing herself to cry before sleeping are also okay, even if… I wish we'd gotten a peek at some steel in her spine from this incident? Possibilities-
A) some reflection over how Kakashi and Gai handled the immediate situation while her own body "felt like lead" from the sight of Daisuke.
B) some sort of vow, sensible or extreme, about how she'll commit herself to ninja life from now on (maybe include her nindo here or hint at it?).
C) A note that she still had Daisuke's blood on her clothing's sleeves from touching him, and a note about the (disturbing?) contrast between her shellshock and Daisuke's unreasonable emotional fortitude.

I guess… I feel like her horror and moments where she is pushed to a breaking point should be described in any of those previous spots in the text. Meanwhile when this scene happens-

Turns out, I wasn't the only one out. Hisako's room was right next to mine and she was looking at me with wide, disappointed and almost fearful eyes.

I looked at her. "We'll talk when we get home, alright?"

"Okay," Hisako nodded, desperately pretending like everything was alright in her head. "Okay, I'd like that."

I hope she hasn't just had her heart broken into a thousand pieces. Or if it has, that I can put it back together.

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Everything I have ingrained about reading stories says that this moment is "the straw that broke the camel's back." This is the moment hope is utterly crushed. It feels like (my instincts say, I mean) the Rule of Three in action, even if it wasn't intended. The third repetition either breaks the trend or establishes it (the result or the pattern) as final, definite. The first event was either finding Daisuke or berating herself with the team. The second was her vulnerability with Daisuke, of letting herself cry at the hospital. And the third would be Hisako, the small hope that she'd get to mull over harems and her feelings for Daisuke over days of rest getting snuffed out, and possibly lying to Daisuke about how "okay" things will be.


I think it is fair to say this tangent I'm going on about "Hisako is stuck playing the role of distraught, crying woman" is weak. Especially compared to the other points I tried to show in the rest of my post. But this one-two-three combo against Hisako feels deliberate as it stands. That feeling would be lessened if you were to A) split up the chapter in two, B) alter the Hokage/Anko/Harem section so it doesn't end with a crushed Hisako, C) with or without A you could have a cooling-off period where the party makes a weary return to the village, or D) give Hisako a moment of progress or character development (positive or dangerously negative!) to foreshadow that her immediate future will be more than "a prospective love interest for Daisuke who is dealing with shellshock."

I get if you disagree. Or I get if you have a plan that includes crushing Hisako's spirits via this painful mission so she can build up something stronger. But I felt a threshold get reached while reading the chapter and the original points were my way of communicating a bit of pity on the girl's behalf.

 

[Pez]

I woke up at 2:30 AM and couldn't fall back asleep, so I let my brain think about a story I was working on that I will probably abandon like I do every story I start, when something about this story popped into my head.

If the Hokage suspects that what the MC has isn't a bloodline, and can't be inherited, why would he allow the MC to potentially take the most promising females as brides? I can certainly understand Anko, but all the other promising young girls his age? Especially after discussing Sasuke, I'd think the Hokage would want someone with an actual bloodline that the village definitely wants/needs to have powerful wives to help rebuild his clan.

Personally, I love Hinata. She's my favorite Naruto waifu (even if she needs a lot of work for anybody other than Naruto to woo). I don't know much about canon Anko, but I love your version of her. I'm really looking forward to future scenes with her (especially the curse mark removal), even if they are just emotional fluff.

 

[Fulcon]

How's this?

Okay...my limbs are all attached, I've got full health…and my hospital gown is a mess.

Hate wet dreams. Even before I died, they were the bane of my existence. Worst part is that I'm going to be remembering this one for a while, too.

Started out with Anko and I getting it on. Awesome. Then Hisako joined in. Ayame walked into the scene wearing nothing but that headband of hers and a smile...then Sakura? Shippuden Sakura kicked in the wall like the Kool-Aid Man. Ino and then Hinata. For some reason after that, Tsunade and Shizune walked in. Then an Uchiha lady? I...got nothing. Then this horned woman with ghost-white skin and...it was just a weird orgy that's left me as disturbed as it turned me on.

I wonder if I can recreate it in real life? No, no, Daisuke. Having an idea of what you want isn't bad, but trying to force it never works. Not that you would, but focus on your self improvement and let the relationships happen as they come. Best way to be attractive is to have the worst day with you be better than the best day with anyone else.

Anyway, on to business.

First thing on the list is that I need a ranged option.

Effectively, mid-game is here. If Arai or whatever his name is is a sign of what's to come, I need a ranged option and I don't have the time to get points I need to focus on Ranged Weapons or Ninjutsu before the next fight, even if I abandoned Fuinjutsu and started pumping points into one or the other.

I've got Chakra Control and Taijutsu. This would be so much easier if the Rasengan could be thrown or something.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 9.

Wait, there is absolutely no reason a Rasengan can't be thrown. If you've got the control, chakra can easily persist in a shape even after it's been separated from your body. If it couldn't, Ninjutsu like Lightning Kunai or Sasuke's fireballs wouldn't be possible.

I don't want to use the Rasengan, though. Needs too much chakra. Ideally, this technique would only take as much chakra as the Lightning Kunai and I'd be able to add Lightning Chakra to it without burning my hands.

Then again, a simple, needle-like loop needed a Ninjutsu of 45, so let's not get our hopes up.

I got up out of bed, keenly aware that I was not wearing any of my Charisma enhancing gear. So if nothing else, I was glad that the door to my private room was closed. On a chair in a corner of the room, was all my gear. My jumpsuit, which was perfectly mended, my sandals and most importantly, my storage scrolls.

Among the survival equipment I kept on my person, I kept some office supplies. Multiple large, mural-sized canvas', pens and markers, and most importantly, duct tape. It was a trivial thing to tape them to the wall with Wall Walking. With the marker, I started working on a seal.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 7.

Fuinjutsu Check Success: 69 / 20.

Thankfully, it wasn't a complex seal. All it did was absorb incoming chakra, which I was going to need to avoid damaging the walls.

How to create a cheap, ranged jutsu with just Chakra Shaping that also still did damage? Well, the easiest thing I can think of is a needle.

So I created a needle, it's sapphire glow illuminated my hand.

Chakra 84 / 85.

It was only a third of the size of the loop and it wasn't a loop, it was just a needle, so that it only took a point of chakra was awesome.

I threw the needle...and it hit the very outskirts of the target.

Okay, before I start on the next phase of my problem, I need to understand what this problem is. This is definitely a Ranged Weapon skill deficiency, but Chakra is magic. I should be able to compensate if I understand what the problem is.

Perception Check Failure: 5 / 6.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 8.

It's not a hand-eye coordination thing. My senses are fine, even without the goggles +2 Perception buff. So the only thing it could be is my muscle memory is completely warped when it comes to weapons.

If that's the case, then I should be able to compensate for that deficiency with Chakra, right? It shouldn't be anything other than some variation of Body Flicker, since that rigs your body up with Chakra and supercharges it.

So...create another needle…

Chakra 84 / 85.

Then rig up your body with Chakra, but with the aim of correcting poor muscle memory.

Medicine Check Success: 27 / 25.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80 / 50.

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 50.

Chakra 64 / 85.

I'm ninety percent sure that the Taijutsu, which is all about understanding body mechanics and how to exploit them for maximum offensive gain, lowered the medicine check. But it works, so I don't care. I threw the needle.

Perk Obtained: C. A. T. S.

Chakra can connect anything, a pair of friends, a person with nature and a kunai with it's target! With the Chakra Assisted Targeting System, you now use your Chakra Control skill in place of your Ranged Weapon skill, if it's higher.

I'm a sucker for creative naming, and as a riff on VATS, I busted up on the spot. That's hilarious! And game-breakingly strong!

And the needle hit a bullseye.

Okay, so I've got my needle, I've got my Ranged Weapon skill deficit figured out, now I just need to figure out the fire-rate problem my needle has, because the way I'm doing it now, I can throw one at a time.

What if I used chakra to create a launching mechanism? Like using a pair of small loops to accelerate the needle to it's target. Let's...see…

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 60.

Chakra: 75 / 85.

My hand was coated with chakra. Above the knuckles of my clenched fist was my firing mechanism, a series of rapidly rotating loops that were collectively the size of a US quarter. To test it, I sent a needle. It flew a little bit slower than a kunai, but it flew and it hit the bullseye. Then I sent twenty needles, which only took me two seconds.

That solves the rate of fire issue, at least, but the projectile speed was atrocious.

If I could add Lightning Chakra, that would fix it, but...well, how many points of Ninjutsu do I need for that to not be a problem? Well…hold on, do I even need a needle? Lightning Chakra is the element of piercing, so I might be able to get away with something even smaller than this needle if I add Lightning Chakra.

To test it, I created a bolt, a little nub about a quarter of the size of the needle and not pointy. Ironically, it had better structural integrity than the larger needle, but that's just because it was so small and compact. It flew, but only half as fast as the needle.

Now...to add the lightning chakra.

Ninjutsu Check Success: 29 / 25.

Perception Check Failed: 5 / 7.

The bolt ripped through the air so fast I couldn't even see it, leaving a black and blue scorch mark on my paper. Closer examination revealed that it had actually poked a small hole in my chakra absorbing paper, though thankfully it had not not damaged the wall behind it.

Okay, awesome.

Now that that's taken care of, I'm getting out of here and looking for my team. This isn't Konoha's hospital, I knew that from the skyline, which meant that they were still in town. Thank goodness for Fuinjutsu, otherwise I would've had to wait until we got back to Konoha and I would've been a nervous wreck the whole time.

...hang on.

I just realized.

The Anko's personalized Fuinjutsu manual?

It brought my Fuinjutsu skill to 69.

If that's not a sign from God or something, I don't know what is.​

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[Galacticplumber]

I'm into it. It has fascinating implications, the jokes work, and hopefully removing the planning intentionality makes it less contentious.

 

[Fulcon]

I'm into it. It has fascinating implications, the jokes work, and hopefully removing the planning intentionality makes it less contentious.

Click to shrink...

Thanks, changes made. Now I'm going to get back to work on the next chapter.

 

[AmberSlime]

Please consider the following.

When did the Penguin's show up in the previous draft?

Where are we at in this story?

Patience, please.

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so when penguins were mentioned earlier does that mean that at some point in the first version of Shinobi: The RPG over on Spacebattles Daisuke got penguins as a summons contract? I didn't actually read the original version because I moved over to this version of the story after I learned that it's the remake, and I'm a tad confused by the whole penguins thing.

 

[Fulcon]

so when penguins were mentioned earlier does that mean that at some point in the first version of Shinobi: The RPG over on Spacebattles Daisuke got penguins as a summons contract? I didn't actually read the original version because I moved over to this version of the story after I learned that it's the remake, and I'm a tad confused by the whole penguins thing.

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Yes, that's right! The penguins are the fourth arc of the story and we just finished the second arc, so the request for patience was me asking to breathe.

Great question, have a cookie.

 

[Fulcon]

The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

Author's Note: For those that haven't, please reread the previous chapter. I replaced the first section to hopefully be less contentious and remove the unfortunate implications. Thank you for your patience and feedback!

* * *
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The moment Anko saw Shimoda Daisuke, she wanted him inside her.

That urge alone rang dozens of alarm bells and raised every single emotional defense she had. The only thing that followed feelings like that were of being used, heartache and a black hole of sorrow. He was her client, of course, so she had to be polite, but that didn't mean he wasn't getting anything out of her. No sir. She was done with that.

She was remembering this as she was examining a tea set in an old antique store. The cups were made of wood, the cloth a fine silk. An ancient but well cared for from what she could tell, reluctantly parted with.

But then Daisuke respected her space, which was decent of him. Kept things civil, beyond the request to walk beside him instead of behind him so he could catch a glimpse every once in a while. The thought was appealing in it's own way, but no. Mitarashi Anko had a job to do.

She set the set down, carefully putting it back in it's bamboo-weave basket with the reverence such a set was due, then placed it in the shopping basket slung over her arm. Then she went to the next one. This one was relatively new. Made of white porcelain, painted with flowers.

This, she put away immediately. Tea sets were meant to be simple, and she was a snob about her tea sets. It was meant to be simple, meditative. The ceremony, a spiritual experience. Hospitality, respect, all things she wanted to share with her new boyfriend.

Anko sighed contentedly.

The first hint that Daisuke, perhaps, might be different than her...other boyfriends, was when he had stuck up for her after she had foolishly left an opening for ROOT to kidnap him. She saw what she had done, then so did the Hokage. A normal genin would've taken credit for killing two highly trained ANBU division Shinobi, then she would've been taken off the mission, and likely Court Martialed.

Not her boyfriend.

He gave all the credit to her, acting like an excited twelve year old he supposedly was, saving her mission and her career.

Daisuke, if nothing else, was thoughtful. Something he demonstrated repeatedly by doing small, sweet kindnesses. Doing the dishes without being asked, sharing the fruits of his Fuinjutsu Experimentation by making her a glass of chocolate milk...the little things.

Of course, she was soon sharply reminded that she wanted to jump his bones, in spite of him being a little young, was when he sparred with a prodigy Hyuuga and blocked his tenketsu.

Anko still couldn't believe Daisuke did that. Then his brutally efficient take down once his challenge was completed...oh, that sent lightning bolts through her body in the best way possible. But, she had to make sure. No one was completely unflappable. Not really.

...so Anko did the stupidest thing she had ever done in her life and threw a kunai at her client.

He didn't even flinch.

He complimented her aim.

He stole her heart.

Anko smiled at the memory, the feeling of certainty that he was the one to make her happy, to complete her. Of their goodbye, feeling his lips against hers, his chakra strings pulling her in, demanding her touch, her snakes similarly encircling him, pressing them against each other. She remembered wanting to go further, but her oath of so long ago came to her mind and she...had to break it off.

Daisuke was nothing but supportive, which she appreciated. Anko was pretty sure her barriers to his touch were made of wet paper at this point, so his respecting of her wishes was beautiful... even though part of her wished he'd just grab her throat, force her to the ground and finally take what was his.

She was a bottom, and certainly not dead.

Anko shook her head. Time for that later. Maybe.

But it was this care in mind that she was looking for a tea set. Something that embodied the careful virtue they were cultivating together that could easily be destroyed the second he lost control, because she would not resist.

A set of wood. Daisuke was not wood. He was stone, and steel. Blue like lightning, relentless like thunder, unyielding like a mountain. Another set of porcelain, this one white and otherwise unpainted. Good, but not quite what she was looking for.

This one was a steel set. Automatically, she didn't like this one. Daisuke was steel, she was not. She was a snake. A pretty snake, as Daisuke put it, a temptress, a dealer of death by instant strikes and venom.

...Daisuke told her she'd make a 'heck of a Mom'. Children were something that she had always wanted. The title of Mother had an almost mythical allure to her that maybe was starting to get closer and closer to reality. In her mind, she used to figure that any child would be fine. Maybe. Someone to cuddle, love, dote on, mother. Now...she wanted Daisuke's children.

Physically, he was a little young. Sure. She admitted it made her feel a little awkward. Just a little. But he didn't act young. Whether it was that he was just an old soul, made more mature by his bloodline or what but with how he acted, it was almost easy to forget that he was fresh out of the academy.

Two cups, ladles, cloths to ceremonially clean the implements. Artfully placed in the box of bamboo.

On a practical level, she knew Daisuke was still human. He didn't seem like it most days, but she knew he had limits, personal weaknesses, just like she did. In particular his resistance to being called a child or a kid struck her as being of note. On the surface, it was a Genin being insistent that because he was technically an adult now meant he should be treated like one but it seemed deeper than that.

Like it was an open wound that got poked whenever he was called a child.

As much as Anko believed it would be helpful for him to come out and talk about it, trying to force the issue would only make him more upset, this she learned by hard experience. She had to use both hands to count the relationships she ruined by being emotionally pushy.

And she did ruin them. She was the one who created problems or contributed to existing ones because of her pride and unwillingness to accept his limitations.

It was a long night at the end of a bottle when she figured that out.

...why couldn't they change?

Well, why couldn't she change?

Anko took a deep breath and let it go.

It was a bad idea to get into that downward spiral of questions. No. She was here to get a new tea-set to host a ceremony for her boyfriend with. It was a new beginning, hopefully one with a happy ending.

The next tea set...was white, of course. But it had a single sakura blossom painted on both cups. A symbol of renewal, painted tastefully in a way that few of other other mass produced sets could match. A new beginning for her and, if Daisuke and her wound up marrying...for both of them.
Anko put this set away, and placed it in her shopping basket.

She had found what she was looking for.
​

* * *
​

"I told you to get lost, Naruto!"

Naruto rubbed his jaw in annoyance as he walked away from the academy. He felt depressed and down trodden as his crush, the prettiest girl in Konoha had turned him down. Again. With that impressive right hook of hers.

"Naruto!"

The boy looked and saw Satoshi, waving with a genial smile on his face as he caught up. "I'm glad to see you! How have you been?"

"I'm fine!" Naruto said with a smile, only to wince in pain as his jaw acted up. "Ow."

"Oh, did that girl hurt you?" Satoshi asked, frowning in sympathy. "The one with the pink hair?"

Naruto winced. "You saw that?"

"I'm afraid I did," Satoshi said with a nod. "So, how's the quest for that scroll I told you about?"

"It's...it's going okay," Naruto said with narrowed eyes. "You know, the Hokage asked me about you. Said you've been talking with enemies of the village!"

"Is that so?" Satoshi asked with alarm. "Who on earth would...oh, right. The bird creature. I remember it. I'm afraid I was only trying to save my own life."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Naruto asked with a glare.

"Well, I was walking down a dark alleyway here in the village one night," Satoshi began to explain. "When I was jumped by a large...bird-man. Truly massive, with it's beak shining in the moonlight. I can only assume it was some form of advanced Henge. I disarmed it and we talked."

"How did you disarm it?" Naruto asked, looking downright amazed.

"Why, with a compliment, of course!" Satoshi said with a smile. "I told it that I was impressed with it's ability to jump from the shadows with such stealth and finesse. It even thanked me!"

"It thanked you?" Naruto asked, flabbergasted. "It nearly killed Daisuke!"

"Did it?" Satoshi asked, looking aghast. "I am so sorry, I didn't know. The creature kept talking about a boy in blue. Is that-?"

"Daisuke? Yeah." Naruto glared, folding his arms. "He started wearing a blue jumpsuit a while ago. And the Hokage said that you had something to do about it."

"Well, I gave him some encouragement and that made him feel good enough to leave me alone," Satoshi replied, bringing his hands up like he was making a plea. "I truly didn't know who he was talking about."

"Okay, well," Naruto started. "You should go talk to the Hokage, get it straightened out. I can bring you too him."

"No, no," Satoshi shook his head. "That's quite alright, but thank you for the offer. I can make it there on my own. Perhaps I'll run into Shimoda-kun as well, and we can clear this misunderstanding right up."

"Yeah, you should do that," Naruto replied, nodding.

"So, about the scroll," Satoshi began.

"What about it?" Naruto asked.

"Well, if you haven't gotten it yet, clearly you have a good reason," Satoshi replied, his head tilting while a curious expression painting itself across his face. "I was wondering what your plans were to take it?"

"I don't know," Naruto shrugged. "The top three levels of the library don't have windows and they're locked by some kind of reinforced gate that the librarian closes when it's time to shut down for the night."

Satoshi hummed. "Quite a conundrum! Walk with me."

The two started walking side-by-side.

"So if one path is closed to you, that just means you need to find the key," Satoshi began. "What do you think that means, Naruto?"

"I need a jutsu to get past the door?" Naruto asked.

"Bright boy!" Satoshi beamed down at the blonde, making him feel really, really good. "Bright boy. Yes, that is the correct answer. You need another jutsu. Did you have a specific jutsu in mind?"

"No," Naruto said, kicking the dirt beneath his shoe. "I don't know of any other jutsu. Do you know? Can you teach me a cool jutsu?"

"Can I teach you?" Satoshi asked airily. "Of course I could. Easily. But this is about taking power for yourself. Without help, remember?"

"I just don't want to ask Daisuke," Naruto remarked with a surly glare. "He's always been better than me at everything, I don't need him rubbing my nose in it."

"Is that so?" Satoshi said. "Well, then. I have another test for you."

"Another test?" Naruto whined. "Come on! Really? Can't you just teach me right now?"

"Oh, don't be so dramatic," Satoshi gently admonished. "It's a very simple thing. Satoshi, you see, is not my only name."

"It's not?" Naruto frowned. "Are you like a spy or something?"

"Hardly," Satoshi answered with a grin. "Different people know me by different names. But, see, I am known throughout the Elemental Nations by one specific name. So the test is simple! Tell me who I am."

"You're famous," Naruto stated, blinking owlishly at the older man.

"Oh, quite famous," Satoshi replied. "Still, if you can't get it, then I can point you in the direction of a technique which will let you get to the Summoning Scroll."

"Really?" Naruto asked, his confusion forgotten. "Where is it?"

"Do you know what a Kinjutsu is?" Satoshi asked.

Naruto started to talk, but then lost track of what he was saying. Then he tried again, only to realize that this was the wrong answer. Satoshi, if he was annoyed at the blonde's slowness, didn't show it.

"It's a forbidden jutsu?" Naruto asked.

"Very good," Satoshi replied, giving a nod of approval. "Now, I believe you've got a glimpse of the scroll of Kinjutsu on the top floor of the academy? In the Hokage's suite?"

"I...yeah!" Naruto nodded. "Is that what the big black scroll is?"

"That's right," Satoshi answered with a happy nod. "Now I'm afraid the sheer amount of trouble you'd be in for stealing the scroll would be significant, I'm afraid. But in that scroll are several techniques that can get you to the scroll with the summoning Jutsu."

"But I can get it," Naruto said, adopting a meditative expression, cupping his chin and looking to the clouds. "Ah, I'd have to put the a fake in it's place while I'm learning it. But what kind of trouble would I be in?"

"Life imprisonment," Satoshi replied, to Naruto's shock. "But is it worth it to get to a place where people like you...for you?"

Naruto folded his arms and looked down and to the side, away from Satoshi's head. "I don't know."

"Assessing the risk is an important part of every venture," Satoshi nodded approvingly. "Caution is a virtue. Of course, if you figure out who I am, I can just teach you the jutsu on those scrolls, no need to take the risk, am I right?"

Naruto grunted. "Can I have a hint, Satoshi? Please?"

Satoshi hummed. "I'll give you two as a gesture of good faith."

"Really?" Naruto beamed. "Thanks!"

Satoshi snapped his fingers. In a plume of smoke, there emerged a scythe in his hand. The handle perfectly straight and so black that it made Naruto's eyes hurt just to look at it. The blade was of crimson steel, curving slightly and gleaming wickedly in the sunlight. "My favored weapon is a scythe."

"Okay," Naruto looked at it, feeling perhaps for the first time in his life an eerie chill rush down his spine like a spider made of ice. What's worse, there was a sick feeling in the pit of his gullet, like something was telling him to run and never stop.

"And I am very, very, very old," Satoshi said, snapping his fingers and making the scythe disappear, leaving only the memory of his feelings. "That, combined with everything else you know about me, should be enough to piece together my identity."

"So your name really isn't Satoshi," Naruto stated carefully.

"It is, actually, Satoshi," he replied. "But that is not the name the Elemental Nations know me by. Find that, and I will teach you anything you wish to know."

"Okay," Naruto said, looking from side to side, noting that the street was empty for some reason in the middle of the day. "Are you sure you can't teach me something now?"

"Oh, I'll give you one lesson," Satoshi replied. "A life lesson, not a jutsu."

"Yeah? What is it?" Naruto asked with a frown.

"The girl who nearly cost you a tooth," Satoshi began with an impassive expression. "You must never trouble her again."

"But she's the prettiest girl in the village!" Naruto debated hotly. "If I can get her to treat me like I'm somebody, I can get anyone in this village to respect me!"

"You obtain respect by treating yourself like you're somebody and training yourself to realize your potential," Satoshi corrected. "Earning respect is like punching a mountain, if you do not have the strength, you only break your hands trying to force it."

"Yeah, well," Naruto folded his arms and frowned deeply, like a child being scolded by a parent. "What does that have to do with Sakura?"

"She has repeatedly told you that she is not interested in you," Satoshi plainly stated. "You cannot force her to change her mind and every attempt to fight it will only fuel her resistance and add to her resentment."

"But Sasuke would be terrible for her," Naruto whined, trying to get him to understand his position. "She thinks she can change him but he's just going to treat her like trash because he's an arrogant jerk!"

"Then let her find that out for herself and find someone that truly wants you," Satoshi insisted. "You cannot teach someone a lesson they do not wish to accept and if you continue along this road, you will bring yourself nothing but pain."

Naruto harrumphed and walked ahead.

Satoshi simply shrugged, turned on his heels and walked in the opposite direction.

Naruto found himself startled when he nearly ran into someone standing on front of a merchant stall. Suddenly, the street was filled with people once again.

Where did all these people come from? Naruto asked in bewilderment. The street was empty!
​

* * *
​

Author's Note: Speaking of the mini-rewrite I did last chapter, I actually like it a lot better. I wrote the first iteration while I was really tired and after I vetoed another scene idea in its entirety – I actually initially planned on having Daisuke go see the town for a bit before heading back to the hotel and meet Tsunade and Shizune. Unfortunately, while this would be 100% in character for a PC to do in an RPG, in a real life scenario made him a giant douche, so I was trying to write stream of conciousness, drawing on the same, insane thought processes that I go through early in the morning in a haze before I get up. Sadly, this made him look like a giant douche.

Sadly, the scene didn't really accomplish much for the story and you guys all took issue with it, so I rewrote it into what it is now. I like it, it actually shows Daisuke making progress in response to a near death experience in a concrete way, as opposed to the abstract way of the previous draft.

Now, for this chapter.

I recognize that it's a bit short, but I really ran out of ideas. I had an idea for a segment involving a character that hadn't been properly introduced, but one of the rules of the fic is that a character cannot have an interlude until they've been introduced in the main story and I've already broke that rule once.

Hopefully, you guys consider this as having a fuller picture of Anko. Shopping for a tea set was an idea I got from one of you, though I don't remember who. Which is a tragedy, because they deserve all the credit for such a brilliant idea. The Japanese Tea Ceremony is something of fascination of mine since it's more than just a get-together; it's almost like a sacred ordinance in Japanese culture. The fact that it's listed as a hobby of Anko's makes her a fairly spiritual person, in my opinion.

As for Naruto, there was a time when I considered Sakura a terrible, terrible person for the physical abuse she heaps on Naruto. While some of the time, it may be undeserved, but I understand the habit developed because Naruto, strong personality that he is, would not take no for an answer and she's starting to run out of options for dealing with a boy that has limitless stamina and is otherwise insanely tough and will not take no for an answer.

Let me know what you think.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon​

 

[MasterMarx]

A fair bit more horny than I remember Anko being in canon, but then again canon was a shonen and she was basically a scary, generally smarter female Naruto with a sense of when to tone it down when she showed up to intimidate everyone who passed the first exam.

 

[Galacticplumber]

Ah okay, Anko's running on very little care whatsoever for formality, but is worried about getting hurt again so moves slightly slower. Got it.

Similarly, absolutely yes pursuing Sakura now is not a thing, and I'd have hated it. Maybe after characters develop. Also assuming the previous plan is still on Kitsune HYPE!

 

[Pez]

Personally, I loved the Anko scene. I hope in this version that Daisuke isn't forced to artifically age himself up. If she can't love him for who he is now, then that's on her.

 

[Fulcon]

A fair bit more horny than I remember Anko being in canon, but then again canon was a shonen and she was basically a scary, generally smarter female Naruto with a sense of when to tone it down when she showed up to intimidate everyone who passed the first exam.

Click to shrink...

That is an interesting point of view! In most of her other appearances in fanfiction, she's the village bicycle because I guess her cutting Naruto's cheek open and licking the blood was kinky, I guess.

Ah okay, Anko's running on very little care whatsoever for formality, but is worried about getting hurt again so moves slightly slower. Got it.

Click to shrink...

I'm glad it was clear. Thanks for your consistent feedback.

Similarly, absolutely yes pursuing Sakura now is not a thing, and I'd have hated it. Maybe after characters develop. Also assuming the previous plan is still on Kitsune HYPE!

Click to shrink...

Yes, Kitsune hype indeed.

Personally, I loved the Anko scene. I hope in this version that Daisuke isn't forced to artifically age himself up. If she can't love him for who he is now, then that's on her.

Click to shrink...

I will keep this in mind in the future. Thank you, have a cookie.

 

[MasterMarx]

That is an interesting point of view! In most of her other appearances in fanfiction, she's the village bicycle because I guess her cutting Naruto's cheek open and licking the blood was kinky, I guess.

Click to shrink...

I ended up on a bit of a research binge last year after some friends on Discord revealed how they were misinformed about canon from some pervasive fanon (which is a rabbit hole in and of itself), kind of reset my view on what makes sense for some characters and what doesn't.

 

[Fulcon]

I ended up on a bit of a research binge last year after some friends on Discord revealed how they were misinformed about canon from some pervasive fanon (which is a rabbit hole in and of itself), kind of reset my view on what makes sense for some characters and what doesn't.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, Anko really isn't a horny character by nature in Canon. In fanon, it's a completely different story.

In this fic, I hope you don't mind, but I'm using aspects of both identities for Anko. Figured it help make her a three dimensional character.

 

[MasterMarx]

Yeah, Anko really isn't a horny character by nature in Canon. In fanon, it's a completely different story.

In this fic, I hope you don't mind, but I'm using aspects of both identities for Anko. Figured it help make her a three dimensional character.

Click to shrink...

I can respect that- it definitely rounds her out a bit more rather than pigeonholing her like fanon tends to. Minor amounts of internal conflict as she works on balancing her more horny... impulses with her job and her interpersonal relationships, and tends to default to "serious worker that can also be excitable like Naruto and a bit scary", I'm assuming?

 

[Fulcon]

I can respect that- it definitely rounds her out a bit more rather than pigeonholing her like fanon tends to. Minor amounts of internal conflict as she works on balancing her more horny... impulses with her job and her interpersonal relationships, and tends to default to "serious worker that can also be excitable like Naruto and a bit scary", I'm assuming?

Click to shrink...

Pretty much, but I'm also ripping apart the Fandom's characterization of her to pieces with her 'fleshed out' backstory.

 

[MasterMarx]

Pretty much, but I'm also ripping apart the Fandom's characterization of her to pieces with her 'fleshed out' backstory.

Click to shrink...

Haha! I like it! I... think you started that a while back without me noticing- since you specifically never put her and T&I in the same sentence, when fanon likes to make her like a lieutenant in that division for some reason.

 

[Fulcon]

Haha! I like it! I... think you started that a while back without me noticing- since you specifically never put her and T&I in the same sentence, when fanon likes to make her like a lieutenant in that division for some reason.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, pretty much. According to the wiki, turns out she's a hunter Nin. That's like, on the opposite side of the spectrum of T&I.