With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

oct9010 · Jun 8, 2022

What happened to Kennedy, anyway? He kind of disappeared from the narrative after the nuclear football thing.

Also, why does Paul seemingly know it's suddenly okay to say Boss Smiley's name? The last time Paul did that Smiley showed up in the real world and teleported him into another dimension, no save, no SR. What changed?

Darth.Bill · Jun 8, 2022

oct9010 said:
What happened to Kennedy, anyway? He kind of disappeared from the narrative after the nuclear football thing.

Also, why does Paul seemingly know it's suddenly okay to say Boss Smiley's name? The last time Paul did that Smiley showed up in the real world and teleported him into another dimension, no save, no SR. What changed?

Probably the fact that Smiley was already watching and aware of what was happening. There was no point in trying to avoid gaining his attention.

Mr Zoat · Jun 8, 2022

Darko said:
Is this intentional?

Yes.

Assblaster5000 said:
I... don't entirely know if this is intentional.

Ow.

That's

No, that's correct.

Bud-E · Jun 8, 2022

I'm glad the Vulture finally got something to eat. She's been saying she was hungry for a while now.

Cherico · Jun 8, 2022

and this ends on 1776.

Brillent

Darko · Jun 8, 2022

oct9010 said:
Also, why does Paul seemingly know it's suddenly okay to say Boss Smiley's name? The last time Paul did that Smiley showed up in the real world and teleported him into another dimension, no save, no SR. What changed?

He may have felt more comfortable confident after his victory that it didn't worry him so much.

Assblaster5000 · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
No, that's correct.

Ah, then that should probably be a question mark at the end, not a period. At least I think it should be give the sentence structure.

thebishop8 · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
I look around a the crowd gathered

"a" to "at"

Mr Zoat said:
Sam jerks in apparent alarm as a cloud of dust drops out of his,

"his" to "him"

Mr Zoat said:
sweat and crime vanishing from his body.

"crime" to "grime"

Chojin Patriarch · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
7th November 2012
11:20 GMT -5

Uncle Sam looks awkwardly at Zauriel.

"I shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, sir."

Well, I suppose they were able to get out of the Bad place right quick once Doctor Mist had kicked the door in. So, back in the real world, Uncle Sam safe and about to be in sound health. Not a bad day's work? Still, things to do, questions to be asked.

"Neither does the Most High. It is possible for an omnipotent being to remove the human capacity for moral failure, and yet the Most High would not countenance it. However, you have recently had considerable exposure to a substance Orange Lantern had called 'ground evil'."

Uncle Sam pats the left side of his chest with his right hand. "That what it was. Stung a little."

No need to put on a brave face, hero.

"I should be able to remove any lingering influence. This is something I offer freely, without requiring that you to follow any particular religion or to encourage others to do so."

"You can?" I smile curiously. "How does that work? I thought that kaahuite accumulated around the once place in creation where God had no presence. That's why it works against angels."

On the other hand, everything around it... That, he can mess with.

Zauriel nods solemnly. "Yes, but the rest of Uncle Sam's body does fall within the auspices of Creation. It is simply a matter of excluding everything that I cannot touch."

I look around a the crowd gathered around the real Washington Monument, being politely encouraged not to approach closer by the local police. I awkwardly wave my right hand, and am greeted by a volley of clicks as tourists from all over make sure to get a picture.

Yeah, this shit is going to be all over the local 'Tubes. 'British man rescues America from itself!' would be an amusing title to see...

"Go ahead, then. And make it snappy; I need to haul my ugly brother to jail where he belongs."

Zauriel nods and screeches a note

Zauriel nods and screeches a note
And it's like the universe skips sideways for a moment. Sam jerks in apparent alarm as a cloud of dust drops out of his, but as far as I can tell he isn't harmed in any way.

Ow. Is that what it's like when reality skips a beat for a second? ...Wonder if he can do that to people's clothes?

Like say, underwear.

"Allow me."

A vacuum cleaner construct sucks it all up, and I get to replenish my reserves of kaahuite ammunition.

Ever the magpie, eh, OL?

Sam nods. "Now, just one thing-"

The eagle flies out of the still-fuzzy Memorial, hat still in his claws. He slows as he approaches Uncle Sam, backwinging in order to deliver the hat into his outstretched right hand.

And boy, is that ever going to be making the meme circuit in record time.

Sam looks at it, frowning.

"Now, why would anyone want to do a thing like that?" He raps his left knuckles against the stovepipe, causing it to invert once more. He smiles. "Much better. Now."

Back to his usual style. Johnny should have known, never mess with a man's hat.

He carefully restores the hat to its place upon his head.

"Is there something I can do for you gentlemen by way of thanks?"

And that's no small offer, because if Sam is one thing, it's honourable.

"Undo whatever Johnny was up to and give Boss Smiley a black eye."

"I was planning on doing that anyway."

Assuming he can find the Grinning Git. Bastard has a knack for hiding.

"The only other things it… You haven't seen John Constantine, have you?"

"I can't say I know who that is."

To be expected, if he's been locked away for nearly fifty years. John's old, but not that old.

Drat.

I sigh. Still, Sam's back and hopefully Boss Smiley is… Whatever he's up to is set back a little.

Probably grumbling a bit about the fact his name is out in heroic circles. But a little trickery and they'll soon forget about him.

Dr. Balewa considers the portal at the Memorial. "Should we not do something about that foul realm, or the beings who live within?"

Sam shakes his head. "Impossible. Every civilization has its failings. Pretending they're not there doesn't help. No, it's confronting them that reminds you why they have to be fought, and lets you build the will to fight them."

An appropriate statement. If he weren't a magical being, he'd do well with a Green Power Ring, I bet.

He scoffs.

"Hn. Do you really think that killing a bunch of worms would prevent dishonest politicians taking bribes? If it were that simple I'd have done it right at the start."

And I don't doubt that a young and foolish Sam did try. Once.

"Thet, I understand. But I could seal the doors with stronger bindings than occur naturally. It would prevent a great deal of the leakage thet has been occurring."

Sam nods. "That doesn't sound-. Do you fellows need to ask Johnny any questions?"

Better locks on the doors, eh? One way to keep things calm and secure.

"Mister Reb, do you know where John Constantine is?"

He just glowers at me. The gag probably isn't helping, but I doubt that he'd want to share either way.

If looks could kill, you'd probably be physics right now.

And… He's magical being whose reaction to the orange light I can't reasonably predict, especially given that those chains of his could drain it right out of whatever touched it. And there isn't an urgent need in the way there was with Uncle Sam.

"His aid will not be necessary. The Demon Constantine became somewhat helpful after you left."

Well, that's good. A few new leads on the real man, then?

"You know where John Constantine is?"

"I believe that I know how to find him."

Well, then. One bet what the next episode will focus on, eh?

"And I doubt that he'll tell us anything about Boss Smiley. I don't have anything. Zauriel?"

Zauriel walks closer to Johnny Reb. "Would you like me to hear your confession?"

...Have you got a couple of years to spare? It could take a while.

"'o."

"Alan?"

"I just wanna go home and take a shower."

Because there's some feelings a Ring can't just wipe away...

He flashes blue for a moment, sweat and crime vanishing from his body.

"Oh. In that case, let's go."

...No matter how hard and often you might try.

Sam makes eye contact with Mr. Reb. "I've been out of the loop for half a century, but since we're locking the door anyway, is there a reason we can't just throw him through and forget about him?"

"It would violate the fifth amendment. We do have a prison for holding magic users, now. Though I admit it would be really convenient."

And do you want him still on the loose in there, spreading his bullshit across America's collective subconscious?

Sam smiles. "Time was, folks were a bit more rough and ready about that kind of thing. I approve. If we don't treat everyone equally before the law then we're not better than him." He thinks for a moment. "Though you're right about-."

A huge talon reaches through the portal, grabbing Johnny Reb and pulling him through!

Well, they passed his little test, but it seems someone else has plans for Johnny-boy.

"Mwu-?"

Alan's quickest off the mark but I'm right on his tail as we fly through the portal-.

Because this might be a play by the Yellow-faced Asshole to reclaim an asset, of course.

Just in time to watch the gigantised vulture peck Mr. Reb's head off.

She tosses her head back to swallow it, then looks down at us.

...Right, then.

"What? He was defenceless, and I was hungry. And you weren't going to die."

"That wasn't the point."

"I'm a scavenger. It's an important part of the ecosystem. I clean things up. And I've got a lot of worms to eat."

Well, can't blame Gordon for doing what she does.

Alan and I look at each other, but I'm not exactly sad that he's finally dead, and I don't want to stay here a moment longer than I have to.

We walk back through the soon-to-be-locked portal as the vulture throws her head back to swallow the rest of him.

That'll make an interesting report on what happened, though. "Yeah, a giant corporate vulture ate him. Circle of Life and all that."

Well, one successful rescue, a threat removed, and a subtle one on the League's radar now. Not a bad day in all. Though I have the feeling the Smiling Bastard has contingencies in place for just such an exposure. A little tweak to people's perceptions, and he's just one more supervillain added to watch lists no-one will notice.

Now, on to John Constantine!

I thought that kaahuite accumulated around the once place in creation...

I thought that kaahuite accumulated around the one place in creation..

No, it's confronting them that reminds you...

Double Space there.

And… He's magical being whose reaction to the orange light...

And… He's a magical being whose reaction to the orange light...

Alasnuyo · Jun 8, 2022

oct9010 said:
What happened to Kennedy, anyway? He kind of disappeared from the narrative after the nuclear football thing.

They probably relocated him to the Heartlands.

oct9010 said:
Also, why does Paul seemingly know it's suddenly okay to say Boss Smiley's name? The last time Paul did that Smiley showed up in the real world and teleported him into another dimension, no save, no SR. What changed?

Last time, he ambushed Paul and Alan in the middle of their magical phone call with Lady Liberty. I doubt that he's brazen enough to do so while several high-powered magic users like Dr Balewa and Zauriel are watching.

oct9010 · Jun 8, 2022

Darth.Bill said:
Probably the fact that Smiley was already watching and aware of what was happening. There was no point in trying to avoid gaining his attention.

I guess that's fair. And if we're assuming 'dimension-shift people into the Badlands' is the only thing Smiley could do to someone, I suppose it would be pretty pointless to keep trying when Balewa knows what's going on and can portal in and out himself.

BlackCoat13 · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
sweat and crime vanishing from his body.

grime

Darko · Jun 8, 2022

Chojin Patriarch said:
Ow. Is that what it's like when reality skips a beat for a second? ...Wonder if he can do that to people's clothes? Like say, underwear

Now I'm imagining something hilarious happening.

•●•

Superman: Zauriel, can you do this?

Zauriel: Yes, the spell should allow me to see past the extensive warding the demon cultist employs. Though I have never performed this specific spell before, I am confident that I can do it.

Zauriel spreads his his arms and wings, opening his mouth he lets out a sound that reverberates across the universe...and the League loses most of their clothes.

Wonder Woman: Great Hera!

Hal: What the?!

Hawkgirl: What the fuck?!

Batman: Zauriel! What happened?!

Zauriel: I...I told you that I have never performed this spell before! But I did not think that this would happen!

Batman: Next time, practice your magic before using it!

There was a moment of silence as everyone turned towards Batman.

Superman: Batman...why do you have underwear with the Bat Symbol printed on them?

Batman:......SHUT UP!

redleo37 · Jun 8, 2022

Why do I feel as though Boss Smiley had him 'killed' (we shall see how long that lasts) for a reason maybe he wanted Reb replaced by someone new and shiny that could do a better job, being a member of the Light means he has choice pick from a lot of supervillains and might want to use one of them to replace Reb.

Sceptic · Jun 8, 2022

Assblaster5000 said:
Ah, then that should probably be a question mark at the end, not a period. At least I think it should be give the sentence structure.

Presumably it's missing the question mark at the end because the tone of voice doesn't have the rising tone at the end that is usually typical of a question.

jasonh23761 · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
Sam smiles. "Time was, folks were a bit more rough and ready about that kind of thing. I approve. If we don't treat everyone equally before the law then we're not better than him." He thinks for a moment. "Though you're right about-."

Oh, I like him. Reminds me a lot of the "What we should aspire to" takes of Captain America rather then the "This is what we are" takes.

DAT_NOOB · Jun 8, 2022

redleo37 said:
Why do I feel as though Boss Smiley had him 'killed' (we shall see how long that lasts) for a reason maybe he wanted Reb replaced by someone new and shiny that could do a better job, being a member of the Light means he has choice pick from a lot of supervillains and might want to use one of them to replace Reb.

That's what I was thinking or killing him so that he couldn't snitch even if he wouldn't snitch.

Mr Zoat · Jun 8, 2022

Assblaster5000 said:
Ah, then that should probably be a question mark at the end, not a period. At least I think it should be give the sentence structure.

Sam doesn't enunciate it as a question.

thebishop8 said:
"a" to "at"
"his" to "him"
"crime" to "grime"

Thank you, corrected.

Chojin Patriarch said:
Ever the magpie, eh, OL?

If Time Bandits taught me anything, it's 'don't leave lumps of elemental evil laying around the place'.

An appropriate statement. If he weren't a magical being, he'd do well with a Green Power Ring, I bet.

4e3486420b7cb22b60eae22cf0511938--green-lanterns-superheroes.jpg

I thought that kaahuite accumulated around the one place in creation..
No, it's confronting them that reminds you...
Double Space there.
And… He's a magical being whose reaction to the orange light...

Thank you, corrected.

NightmareWarden · Jun 8, 2022

The Froggy Ninja said:
He moved the universe a foot to the left, thus appearing to dislodge the Kaahuite, as it remained stationary due to its resistance to Theurgy.

I wonder if any of the Guardians of the Universe blame Paul for said movement. I think I would, in their shoes.

Bramble Thorn · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
If Time Bandits taught me anything, it's 'don't leave lumps of elemental evil laying around the place'.

I hope this means OL is really proactive about policing any anti-angel ammunition he uses.
...and also, that some poor angels may get shot with recycled ammo in the future, stained with the blood of the last divine being OL had a 'frank exchange of views' with before them...

Duke Long · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
without requiring that you to follow any particular religion

Extraneous 'to'

Mr Zoat said:
The only other things it…

'thing is'

Bramble Thorn said:
I hope this means OL is really proactive about policing any anti-angel ammunition he uses.
...and also, that some poor angels may get shot with recycled ammo in the future, stained with the blood of the last divine being OL had a 'frank exchange of views' with before them...

I think most of the times (maybe all of them) that he shot an angel with kaahuite were either in the Silver City or Hell, both of which are places that don't really need help with cleanup.

Mr Zoat · Jun 8, 2022

Duke Long said:
Extraneous 'to'
'thing is'

Thank you, corrected.

Mquz · Jun 8, 2022

The Froggy Ninja said:
He moved the universe a foot to the left, thus appearing to dislodge the Kaahuite, as it remained stationary due to its resistance to Theurgy.

Watch this create problems due to effectively moving all Kaahuite in the universe a foot to the right. Presumably there's some holding an ancient evil somewhere

Ngamer11 · Jun 8, 2022

Mquz said:
Watch this create problems due to effectively moving all Kaahuite in the universe a foot to the right. Presumably there's some holding an ancient evil somewhere

Or maybe he just moved Uncle Sam slightly, and the universe glitching is just a side effect of the kaahuite resisting being moved.

Prince Charon · Jun 8, 2022

Ngamer11 said:
Or maybe he just moved Uncle Sam slightly, and the universe glitching is just a side effect of the kaahuite resisting being moved.

I think that's more likely, personally.

Windona · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
Sam smiles. "Time was, folks were a bit more rough and ready about that kind of thing. I approve. If we don't treat everyone equally before the law then we're not better than him." He thinks for a moment. "Though you're right about-."

And that shows that Uncle Sam really is the American ideal. Well, that and the fact he doesn't go for establishing a religion in particular despite the repeated comments about how religious the US is.

...it occurs to me that there's a non-zero chance of Uncle Sam joining the JL.

Handlewithcare said:
Aww, no beatdown

But wait, the Vulture was...what, opportunism? Predatory market practices?

Why would she kill the worms and Reb?

Exactly. The predatory practices don't care about the well being of others at all, and the vulture will eat weak allies as much as enemies. Think corporate takeovers and all the wheeling and dealing drama you hear about in the business world.

Enochi · Jun 8, 2022

Stsword said:
And yes, they started it. In the so called "War of Northern Aggression," the South fired first.

Eh. That is a bit overblown. There is a lot of information on that that often goes overlooked. See there were 3 forts that protected Charleston at the time. Only one, Sumter, had guns that faced toward the city itself. The commander in charge of Fort Moultrie abandon his post there to take over Sumter 6 days after the South Carolina had left the union in December 1860. Supplies are low on the base however as it wasn't stocked for a siege. A resupply attempt (And an addition 200 troops) is made in January but Cadets from one of the other installations fire on the ship and force it to abandon the attempt. This stalemate continues until April when Lincoln tells CSA diplomats that he is going to resupply the fort forcing the issue. At this point the CSA asks the fort to surrender and is declined.

Here is where it gets interesting however as both sides TELL EACH OTHER EXACTLY WHERE THEY ARE GOING TO SHOOT. The Confederate forces shoot at the walls and knock down a flagpole and the Sumter forces ping shots off an iron roof. This goes on for a day and a half. After which Sumter surrenders. The defenders of the Fort with Zero Casualties or Injuries are allowed to immediately board a ship to take them to New York and fire a hundred gun salute. During the hundred gun salute a shell goes off prematurely killing two of the Union Soldiers.

So yeah the South did fire first but it was more like a scripted play then an attack.

Tzeentch · Jun 8, 2022

Mr Zoat said:
A huge talon reaches through the portal, grabbing Johnny Reb and pulling him through!

"Mwu-?"

Alan's quickest off the mark but I'm right on his tail as we fly through the portal-.

Just in time to watch the gigantised vulture peck Mr. Reb's head off.

She tosses her head back to swallow it, then looks down at us.

"What? He was defenceless, and I was hungry. And you weren't going to die."

"That wasn't the point."

"I'm a scavenger. It's an important part of the ecosystem. I clean things up. And I've got a lot of worms to eat."

Alan and I look at each other, but I'm not exactly sad that he's finally dead, and I don't want to stay here a moment longer than I have to.

We walk back through the soon-to-be-locked portal as the vulture throws her head back to swallow the rest of him.

Oh, Goodie! NOW the Southern Granny can assume her rightful place in the supernatural hierarchy!

Darko · Jun 8, 2022

Tzeentch said:
Oh, Goodie! NOW the Southern Granny can assume her rightful place in the supernatural hierarchy!

Sadly, that's not going to happen.

Mr Zoat said:
Nope. Johnny managed to hang on, but that's it

Mr Zoat · Jun 8, 2022

Darko said:
Sadly, that's not going to happen.

I mean... If someone killed Sam as well, maybe.

With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

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