Cosmos Quest (Naruto/Lupin III)

[uju32]

That, pretty much. Honestly, if you pick the honest option you still aren't going to be blabbing everything about yourself, you're just going to give them an informed report of the situation. From the situation as you see it, they might be able to put together that you can hear tenketsu or they might not. None of them have extensive medical training, so it's not certain they've ever even heard of tenketsu.

Click to shrink...

Kankuro is a puppetmaker who received tips from Chiyo, and operates what are basically chakra mediated unmanned ground drones.
If he doesn't know what tenketsu are I'll eat my shoes.
Especially given the quality of education you give the children of a Kage.

And we're still being evaluated, anyway, both for judgement and information security.
And frankly someone looking to go into intelligence should have at least a modicum of information control, allies or not.

 

[hunter09]

[X] Hey, they're allies, and at this point in the exam your sensing isn't really something to keep secret anymore. Tell them everything you can hear.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

Kankuro is a puppetmaker who received tips from Chiyo, and operates what are basically chakra mediated unmanned ground drones.
If he doesn't know what tenketsu are I'll eat my shoes.
Especially given the quality of education you give the children of a Kage.

And we're still being evaluated, anyway, both for judgement and information security.
And frankly someone looking to go into intelligence should have at least a modicum of information control, allies or not.

Click to shrink...

It's also our secret to tell. Yes, ninja, village has some say, but it's still ours. If we walk away with this with a solid relationship with the children of a Kage, to the point where they're sharing intel with us freely? This is supposed to fostor inter-village cooperation and you need a degree of mutual trust for that. And hell, Gaara straight up gave a sample of blood (assuming it didn't get vanished in between when Menka picked it up and we pocketed it), so continuing quid pro quo is not a bad policy. This isn't Whispering Mist we're talking with so unless everyone in the arena can hear us (and I doubt we're THAT carless) I'm willing to take a calculated risk. Especially when Furiko hands us outcomes.

Intelligence is not all super spy games. Sometimes it's just making a person want to tell you stuff. And sometimes that's gonna be give and take.

I'd have much preferred to get them to open up by discussing music, a much safer topic, but we threw that opportunity away in favor of focusing on the fight. I regret that when I called Haku opening with Hiding in Mist, I neglected to think the next step through, that being " If Lee can't see shit then neither will we." Hinata has it covered better anyway. Her and Mokona. Even Lupin has gone and buggered off on us. So, now we deal with what we've got.

 

[Guile]

Kankuro is a puppetmaker who received tips from Chiyo, and operates what are basically chakra mediated unmanned ground drones.
If he doesn't know what tenketsu are I'll eat my shoes.
Especially given the quality of education you give the children of a Kage.

And we're still being evaluated, anyway, both for judgement and information security.
And frankly someone looking to go into intelligence should have at least a modicum of information control, allies or not.

Click to shrink...

Also, you know, OOC they might be invading us later.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

Also, you know, OOC they might be invading us later.

Click to shrink...

I'm betting on no invasion myself, chunin exam proceeds to completion. At very least canon kissing its ass goodbye. Furiko has gone out of her way to avoid it....not as much as she could but quite a lot.

Actually, if they are planning, we can expect a nice big panic spike when they get an idea of our capabilities. But I don't think they are. Furiko straight up says Temari sucks at keeping secrets under wraps, and if they were making plans right now I highly doubt Dante!Gaara would be so friendly. The only time I know of Dante being somewhat duplicitous was against Arius and Arius was a ham eating jackass who went out of his way to antagonize Dante. Or him and his trick coin. Neither are terribly relevant to us.

If they are planning something nasty, in all likelihood only being someone the like and they don't want to fight is gonna get them to stay their hand.

 

[Unclouded]

[X] Hey, they're allies, and at this point in the exam your sensing isn't really something to keep secret anymore. Tell them everything you can hear.

 

[Vindictus]

[X] Hey, they're allies, and at this point in the exam your sensing isn't really something to keep secret anymore. Tell them everything you can hear.

 

[FurikoMaru]

[X] Not remotely appropriate, but very festive

"Lee's not hurt," you say. "He seems to be in good spirits, actually; Haku must be fast enough to be fun."

Temari blinks. "You can sense his emotional state?"

You wink. "I'm a Yamanaka; it's what we do. 'Positive love' is our motto."

"'Groovy'," murmurs Kankuro. "What about the Mist guy?"

"He's in stalling-mode. Has been since the fight started. It's hard to get a lock on him physically, but all things considered, I think he might have a broken rib or something. It isn't slowing him down, whatever it is - after all, the fog's still hanging around."

"What're they holding back for?" Temari says with a roll of her eyes. "I get that if that's Zabuza over there, his students probably know something about Silent Killing, so we wouldn't hear what he's doing, but you'd think we'd have heard at least one jutsu from bowlcut there."

"Nori-sempai doesn't need jutsu," Ami declares with a snort, and everyone turns to look at her. "That guy's terrifying enough without them."

=

"Ah, you are my adorable student's kouhai Ino-chan, are you not?"

Maito "Fuckin' Sunset, Seriously, What The Shit Is That?" Gai has a reputation, even among jounin, for outbursts of craziness. Given your own rep, you thought that would mean the two of you would get on like a house on fire.

It's a little different when you see him in person.

"Y-yes," you say, leaning away from him slightly. The pressure from the man's sheer presence is overwhelming; you wouldn't usually notice someone's Yang chakra as distinct from their Yin, but Gai's is in fucking Dolby. It's like an enormous shaggy dog that's just so gosh-darned happy to see you and wants to give you all kinds of kisses, nevermind that you just saw it cleaning its balls a minute ago. "You must be his jounin-sensei. How do you do?"

"Ino-chan," Gai says, in a slightly quieter tone of voice that you would in no way term a whisper, "I have an urgent matter I would discuss with you! Lee, may I speak with your dear underclassman?"

Lee fires off a salute. "Of course, sensei! I shall proceed with my training alone. Ino-chan, when you catch up with me we'll move on to aerial redirection!"

"See ya then, sempai."

After Lee takes off, Gai says in an actual whisper, "Lee tells me it was you who taught him elemental meditation."

"He remembers that?" you ask, blinking. "Man, that was ages ago. He said he was going to practise, but I never saw him make any big gains in ninjutsu or genjutsu, so I thought..."

"It's true," Gai says stoutly, "Lee has absolutely no talent for genjutsu or ninjutsu whatsoever. However!" He points a finger in your face, making you flinch. "Though you may doubt it, he has practised diligently for many years, and can now achieve a connection to any of the elements with just ninety seconds of meditation!"

"Ninety seconds?!"

"Of course!" Gai lets out a hearty laugh, and slaps you on the back so hard you almost tip right over. "You should be proud of our mutual student, Ino-sensei! He has gloriously persevered and made wonderful progress!"

"Well, yeah, I should say so!" Son of a bitch, it still takes you like an hour every time - not that you do it all that often. Which leads you to your next question: "But usually people stop practising the meditation once they make the first connection. Why has he kept it up so long?"

"That is what I wished to discuss with you." And suddenly, Gai's all business.

=

"Behind you!" Hinata blurts out.

"Rikugame-ryu: Caressing Claw!"

With a cry and the speed of a rocket, Haku is thrown up and backward out of the cloud, coming to a stop seemingly in mid-air, spread-eagled.

The mist clears.

Haku struggles, caught high in the web of sticky-wire left behind from your match with Tenten. His clothes are torn in several places in a manner that would strike you as rather appealing under different circumstances.

Lee stands below, arms crossed, brown splotches on his face and neck, green and yellow lines around his eyes, his slight overbite much more pronounced than normal, almost resembling a beak.

Hundreds of senbon lie scattered across the floor.

Two stick out of the armour above his kidneys.

Gaara whistles. "Hero in a halfshell, huh?"

"Do you yield, Haku-san?" he calls.

Haku hangs his head, and falls still. "... I yield."

"Winner, Rock Lee."

As the ecstatic smile rushes up from Lee's chakra and across his face, the lines and splotches retreat, and he falls to the ground.

"Medic," the proctor calls, "we need two stretchers!"

"Congratulations, Gai-sensei," you call, wiping away a fake tear. "Our little Lee is all grown up."

Whoa. If chakra music could kill, Haku would already be digging your grave. And yet his face remains as blank as a doll's. Supercreepy.

"... indeed, this is so."

Your attention turns back to Gai, and you see his fingers gripping the railing tightly. To your slight embarrassment on his behalf, entirely genuine rivers of tears are flowing down his face.

"But even still..." he says, "... discipline must be observed."

... uh oh.

"Leeeeee!" Gai hollers, leaping into a flying kick. "Did I not specifically order you not to make use of senjutsu in this stage?!"

"His punishment will have to wait," the chief medic nin says, not even looking up from his examination, "you can kick him in the face in a week."

Gai's body swings around and he lands casually next to the medical team like nothing happened. "Very well! Lee, when you have recovered, you will drag yourself across the diameter of Konoha using only your fingertips."

"He can't hear you, Gai-sensei, he's unconscious. Stop yelling at my patient."

"Of course, medic-san!"

-_- "Now stop yelling at me, please."

"Well," Kankuro says, voice calm, chakra anxiously jangling. "You've certainly got some interesting guys here in Konoha."

"Shit, can I defect?"

"Do you have to say that everywhere nice we visit?!"

-----

So yeah! Fun fact for today: hornbill sea turtles are durable as shit and literally eat poison for breakfast.

Happy Halloween. 8) I hope this trick has been a treat.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

"Hero in a halfshell, huh?"

Teenage mutant ninja turtles, gimme, I'm up to 3 Z-Slashes.

Still, this would explain why Haku didn't drop Lee like I expected him too or poison his ass.

Unfortunately, now it means we can't either. So here's hoping someone else knocks Lee's ass outta the exam. Was the Lee the one with perfect balance, and yet zero talent anywhere else? Or is this the hard work shtick still?

 

[FurikoMaru]

"Hero in a halfshell, huh?"

Teenage mutant ninja turtles, gimme, I'm up to 3 Z-Slashes.

Click to shrink...

As a courtesy to Nitramy, I refrained from making them the Four Sages of the Turtle contract.

 

[FurikoMaru]

Was the Lee the one with perfect balance, and yet zero talent anywhere else? Or is this the hard work shtick still?

Click to shrink...

Nope. Still hard work.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

As a courtesy to Nitramy, I refrained from making them the Four Sages of the Turtle contract.

Click to shrink...

I thought Nitramy had other sages for Turtle? Ah well.

Wait, Rikugame-ryu: Caressing Claw, that's Kamen Rider? 3 and 1/3 then. Woo hoo!

And hard work huh? Figures. So the last one is still out there.

 

[FurikoMaru]

Wait, Rikugame-ryu: Caressing Claw, that's Kamen Rider? 3 and 1/3.

Click to shrink...

That's a real thing? I made that up.

And stop editing in new shit!

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

That's a real thing? I made that up.

And stop editing in new shit!

Click to shrink...

Damnation, I had just edited it out and made a new post.

And do be entirely honest, I took a wild fucking guess by just plugging Rikugame in google and seeing what turned up. The tech itself didn't show, Rikugame sounded like it fit the bill. If it wasn't intentional, I'll stick with 3.

Unless Kankuro's 'Groovy' is a reference to Austin Powers or something Dante says. And I'll try to make this my last edit, heheh.

Sand team sounds fun. And who the fuck is gonna seriously want to attack Konoha now? That be some heavy duty bullshit there.

 

[FurikoMaru]

Ah. Rikugame are tortoises as opposed to turtles. I would have used Kame-ryu, but, well, we already have those guys, and while Gai does know a few of them, they have a strict we-don't-train-ninja policy.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

Well. If Ami fights Suigetsu, and Ami wins, Zabuza's entire damned team will never even reach the finals.

And they'd have lost entirely to Konoha.

That'd be some serious shame right there.

 

[uju32]

[X] Not remotely appropriate, but very festive

Click to shrink...

Lol.

Temari blinks. "You can sense his emotional state?"
You wink. "I'm a Yamanaka; it's what we do. 'Positive love' is our motto."
"'Groovy'," murmurs Kankuro. "What about the Mist guy?"

Click to shrink...

*blinks*
Is EVERYONE on that team a reincarnation?
Because 60s' slang is not what I expect out of the puppet dude.

Anyway, reference is Evil Dead 2, by Ash.
Halloween ref, eh?
That takes me up to 2 2/3 Z-slashes.

Haku struggles, caught high in the web of sticky-wire left behind from your match with Tenten. His clothes are torn in several places in a manner that would strike you as rather appealing under different circumstances.
Lee stands below, arms crossed, brown splotches on his face and neck, green and yellow lines around his eyes, his slight overbite much more pronounced than normal, almost resembling a beak.

Click to shrink...

Senjutsu instead of Gates?
Or in addition to?

And kudos to Lee on making use of environmental factors even with impaired vision.
And yet Haku seems to have managed to use his mirrors without giving anything away.
Nicely done there as well.

Gaara whistles. "Hero in a halfshell, huh?"

Click to shrink...

Hymn grabbed this.

Whoa. If chakra music could kill, Haku would already be digging your grave. And yet his face remains as blank as a doll's. Supercreepy.
"... indeed, this is so."

Click to shrink...

Huh.
Wonder why he's pissed at us; we didn't kick the crapola out of his ass, after all.

Your attention turns back to Gai, and you see his fingers gripping the railing tightly. To your slight embarrassment on his behalf, entirely genuine rivers of tears are flowing down his face.
"But even still..." he says, "... discipline must be observed."
... uh oh.
"Leeeeee!" Gai hollers, leaping into a flying kick. "Did I not specifically order you not to make use of senjutsu in this stage?!"

Click to shrink...

And Gai is HILARIOUS.
One of my favorite characters.

"Well," Kankuro says, voice calm, chakra anxiously jangling. "You've certainly got some interesting guys here in Konoha."

Click to shrink...

This is a quote.
I can't recall where from, but I'm dead certain it's a quote.

"Shit, can I defect?"
"Do you have to say that everywhere nice we visit?!"

Click to shrink...

;D

So yeah! Fun fact for today: hornbill sea turtles are durable as shit and literally eat poison for breakfast.
Happy Halloween. 8) I hope this trick has been a treat.

Click to shrink...

In more fun facts, some turtles breathe through their butts.
Happy Halloween to you too.

 

[Guile]

Ah, Lee.

Showing us that the path Ino would never take (picking one thing and sticking to it) can be pretty great.

Edit: Oh, and Haku's bitchface is presumably because we're cracking jokes about a hard fight of his that he lost before Zabuza. We tend to stomp on open wounds without noticing fairly regularly with Ino.

 

[uju32]

Ah, Lee.
Showing us that the path Ino would never take (picking one thing and sticking to it) can be pretty great.

Edit: Oh, and Haku's bitchface is presumably because we're cracking jokes about a hard fight of his that he lost before Zabuza. We tend to stomp on open wounds without noticing fairly regularly with Ino.

Click to shrink...

Good point.
Ino: the anti-Naruto.

Wonder what happens if you try to learn senjutsu without any animal summons doing the tutoring.

 

[Torgamous]

*blinks*
Is EVERYONE on that team a reincarnation?
Because 60s' slang is not what I expect out of the puppet dude.

Click to shrink...

He could've picked it up from his brother.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

Hmmm.....

Question, given the abundant number of Z-Slashes floating around. Is there an option of just straight up paying a bunch of Z-Slashes upfront, and Ami just gets one long CMOA against Suigetsu?

 

[Guile]

2 with Uju and 3 from you seems like a lot, but if there is some invasion plot stuff going on, those could disappear pretty quick.

 

[uju32]

He could've picked it up from his brother.

Click to shrink...

Doubt it.
Not the kinda language any of the Dante incarnations I know used.

 

[Vindictus]

So, uh, are we voting now, or-?

... I'll put a vote out just in case. If it becomes irrelevant, please ignore it.

[X] "Eh, with great power comes great crazy. Or something like that, anyway."
-->[X] Take a moment to ask one of the Med-Nin about Kiba's status. You know, while they're here and stuffs.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

2 with Uju and 3 from you seems like a lot, but if there is some invasion plot stuff going on, those could disappear pretty quick.

Click to shrink...

We pick them up pretty damned fast all things considered. I'm really not that worried, especially when the difficulty level as it is isn't that high. So far we just use Z-Slashs for caper time and style.

And honestly, Ami kicking ass here would really spur her development. It's the kind of accomplishment that would very much grab Sasuke's interest, she'd be much more prominent to Konoha at large, and they'll want her to be even better for the finals. We got time. And the consequences of Ami winning i.e. Mist gets shut down and Neji eats his words, is worth it in entertainment.

I only made the request because we're not exactly used to playing as Ami here. We've never played anyone but Ino. So if I could just pay Z-Slashes for Ami to put on a show, I'd take it. I want to see the story go in this direction.

 

[uju32]

And honestly, Ami kicking ass here would really spur her development. It's the kind of accomplishment that would very much grab Sasuke's interest, she'd be much more prominent to Konoha at large, and they'll want her to be even better for the finals. We got time. And the consequences of Ami winning i.e. Mist gets shut down and Neji eats his words, is worth it in entertainment.

Click to shrink...

Given Lee's victory, I'd rather Ami not fight Suigetsu here.

Given that there's a good chance Konoha's fixing the matches anyway to ensure the most entertaining matchups for the finals, I would expect them to arrange for Suigetsu to face adequate but not stellar opposition on his way to the finals.
Think of it like seeding tennis matches in a tournament; Ino, Gaara, Suigetsu, Neji, Lee, Kibi would have been top seeds, and most likely to meet bottom seeds earlier on.
The whole point being to arrange for an entertaining final.
And there are political considerations as well to allow for a Major Village to save some face.

And the impact will be better if Ami beats or draws him in the actual finals, in front of civilians and potential clients.
Better for her self-esteem, better for her aspirations.
Instead of in a small hall, where the only witnesses are jounin-sensei, proctors and other contestants.

 

[FurikoMaru]

You call down to the floor, "Hey, medic-san! How's Kiba?"

The chief medic ignores you, but one of the underlings says, "The Inuzuka boy? He'll be fine."

You pout. 'Fine' is a lot vaguer than you wanted to hear, but you suppose they didn't want to be more specific in the hearing of foreign villages. Can't blame them; bullet wounds aren't something you necessarily want your enemies getting tips on, either.

"So who're you hoping to fight first in the finals?" Temari asks you.

A standard kunoichi icebreaker if ever there was one. This could be a good sign.

[X] "Anyone who isn't your little brother, more or less. No offence, Gaara, but you're a scary bastard."

[X] "Hm. Not sure yet. I'd have to see everyone in action before I decide."

[X] Lee (Why?)

[X] Hyuuga Neji (Why?)

[X] Hyuuga Hinata (Why?)

[X] Nara Shikamaru (Why?)

[X] Akimichi Chouji (Why?)

[X] Haruno Sakura (Why?)

[X] Sayuri (Why?)

[X] Kuwabara Ami (Why?)

[X] Houzuki Suigetsu (Why?)

[X] Kuyo (Why?)

[X] Ira (Why?)

[X] Kibi (Why?)

[X] Kankuro (Why?)

[X] Gaara (For the love of god, why?)

[X] "You, of course." (Why?)

[X] "Honestly? No one." (Why?)

 

[FurikoMaru]

Given Lee's victory, I'd rather Ami not fight Suigetsu here.

Click to shrink...

Well tough. The fight selections are genuinely random in-universe. If I'd been going for a fix-is-in feel, Lee would have fought Kankuro and you'd have fought Sakura.

 

[uju32]

You call down to the floor, "Hey, medic-san! How's Kiba?"
You pout. 'Fine' is a lot vaguer than you wanted to hear, but you suppose they didn't want to be more specific in the hearing of foreign villages. Can't blame them; bullet wounds aren't something you necessarily want your enemies getting tips on, either.

Click to shrink...

Pfft.
Guns aren't new here; you've made that clear back when Ino was in the Academy.
If they wanted to figure out how bullet wounds worked, they'd buy a gun, shoot pigs and autopsy the bodies.

More likely than not, the medics have a thing about shouting patient information in public, just to assuage a genin's curiosity.
And Ino IS a snotty brat.

Well tough. The fight selections are genuinely random in-universe. If I'd been going for a fix-is-in feel, Lee would have fought Kankuro and you'd have fought Sakura.

Click to shrink...

Honestly, my current head canon is that there's a board that seeds the survivors of stage 2 based on mission history, performance in stage 1, and maybe experience + course completion time.
Jounin-sensei of foreign teams might be allowed to sit in on it as a courtesy, and to head off early accusations of behind the scenes manipulation.

Because random selection seems too much of a crapshoot for ninja.
If foreign ninja got a courtesy bump in the rankings, it would explain why people would choose to take exams outside their home village.
And it would help explain how the up to date mission history for Gaara and most of the other contestants happened to be in a place where Kabuto could access it days to the exam.

 

[FurikoMaru]

Pfft.
Guns aren't new here; you've made that clear back when Ino was in the Academy.
If they wanted to figure out how bullet wounds worked, they'd buy a gun, shoot pigs and autopsy the bodies.

Click to shrink...

Guns aren't new, but worthwhile ones definitely are.

Honestly, my current head canon is that there's a board that seeds the survivors of stage 2 based on mission history, performance in stage 1, and maybe experience + course completion time.
Jounin-sensei of foreign teams might be allowed to sit in on it as a courtesy, and to head off early accusations of behind the scenes manipulation.

Because random selection seems too much of a crapshoot for ninja.
If foreign ninja got a courtesy bump in the rankings, it would explain why people would choose to take exams outside their home village.
And it would help explain how the up to date mission history for Gaara and most of the other contestants happened to be in a place where Kabuto could access it days to the exam.

Click to shrink...

Kabuto was like a quadruple agent at one point. I'd be more surprised if he didn't know every genin's stats.

As for random selection being a crapshoot... fucking duh. Life is unfair, suck it up. Stacking the deck is just going to make you look desperate in the eyes of your peers, which is the opposite of what the chuunin exams are about. Strength and cunning speak for themselves.

Besides, they don't usually have a prelim anyway. The Rookie 9 and Team Gai just fucked up the curve with their unexpected awesomeness in canon. There's no reason for there to be behind-the-scenes schmoozing when there's normally nothing to schmooze about.