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Cosmos Quest (Naruto/Lupin III)

[X] Standing on the corner feeling blue

"I can't believe I doubted you, you madwoman," you say cheerfully, slipping in beside Ami along the railing. "Congratulations on completely mindfucking the opposition."

She wants to smile, you can tell, but she's still pissed enough at you to hide it.

"Thank you," she says coolly. "Are you done playing footsie with bloodthirsty battle junkies?"

You smirk. "If I were, I'd have to stop playing with you, now, wouldn't I?"

Ah-ah-ah, there's the grin. Yeah, you've still got it. 8)

Menka jumps from your shoulder to hers and gets some pets for his trouble.

Hinata, meanwhile, is in what your mom would call a tizzy over her still-idling teammate. "Shikamaru-kun, you have to! What will your mother do to you if you don't get to the finals?"

"... hmph. You have point."

"He's got a gun too," you quickly mime to Shikamaru. You slap him on the back, saying, "Good luck, Shika-chan! Don't go too wild on him, I know you have issues with that!"

-_- "Mendok'se."

"Ami," Asuma says, nodding in the direction of the hallway, and after a small moment's hesitation she follows him out.

"Begin!"

The two opponents size each other up.

No, wait, is that the fucking puppet?

As far as your ears are concerned, now that they're in the arena, there's no difference. Some songs start in Kankuro and spread to the puppet strapped to his back, some emanate from the puppet and go back to Kankuro.

That's insane! I mean I knew before the puppet had something like a chakra system, that's why I didn't notice it was a puppet at first during the written test, but I thought it was a- I don't know, some kind of multi-seal array to throw off sensors! Or a don't-look-at-this-too-closely genjutsu! Fuck! Can that thing use jutsu?

Oi, Ino, calm down~! It's okay. It's okay. At least now we know.

You frown. Hell of a lot of good that's going to do Shika-chan.

You've been dealing with Kiba and Ami too long. Trust him. He'll notice it.

Shit... this is beyond Hien. This-

Has Shintenshin written all over it.

... someone just made it into the top three.

"Ready when you are," Kankuro says, hands in his pockets.

"That's my line," Shikamaru replies, echoing the pose.

"Hm? Even now you're carefree." The puppet drops, and Kankuro yanks its bindings aside. Surprise surprise, it looks just like him.

"Kind of pisses me off, honestly."

The puppet lunges forward at a speed you're not sure Kiba could equal and you know Shikamaru can't-

-Kagemane no Jutsu/Shadow Imitation Technique!-

"Phew!" Shika says, blinking away the last of his nap-borne fatigue. "That was a close one. Thought I'd have to wait longer for you to get impatient and try something." He pulls out a broken-off kunai handle, and the puppet follows suit with a whole kunai from its own pouch on the opposite leg.

"I know you're the real one," Shikamaru tells the puppet, and sure enough, its - his - eyes widen.

Along with yours. Holy crap. He's right.

"The tension in the wires connecting you is pulling in the wrong direction for you to be the puppet," he explains. "And even if they weren't, the one back there doesn't have the normal ease of movement that a real human does; I haven't seen him blink once since we got down here." He lifts the handle in his hand to his throat. "Concede and I'll let you live."

Kankuro laughs under his breath. "You've got good eyes, kid."

Behind him, with blinding speed, the puppet throws a brace of shuriken at the lights, and for the second time in ten minutes, the room goes dark, save for the soft, indirect light from the broken windows.

You can dimly make out Kankuro - or, wait, is it the puppet?! ARGH! - as he rushes Shikamaru and knocks him unconscious.

"But they aren't the eyes of a killer."

Oh, a tough guy! I think I'm gonna like this one.

Little more sentimental than you usually see around here, too.

"Winner, Kankuro. And we'll take a short break while we get the lightbulbs replaced."

"So what do you guys do with your uncool family members?" you ask Temari. "Do you hide them in the basement, or are there remedial classes in Stylishness they can take?"

"Apparently we make 'em Kazekage," Gaara says dryly.

"Uh... where did the lights go?" Ami asks, returning with Asuma. She's been crying, but not for very long or very hard; if you weren't a sensor you wouldn't be able to tell.

"Kankuro ganked 'em," Temari says proudly.

"He did? Good for him, I always said being a one-trick pony would come back to bite Shikamaru-kun."

No. Kagemane wasn't the problem here.

"No. It wasn't the jutsu that failed him," Kankuro says, arriving back on the balcony. "He lacks experience."

His instincts aren't sharp enough.

... would you two like to be alone? o_O

"Tch. I was sloppy." Kankuro leans on the railing. "If he were a little older he'd've had me."

"Man, you always worry about the past!" Gaara claps his brother on the back. "You ought to be worrying about the future - like how I'm gonna beat your ass in the finals."

"Pass. I like to keep my organs on the inside, thanks."

"Hey," Ami says to you in a whisper, "you wanna visit Kiba? They'll be working on the lights for a while."

[X] You'll visit him when the matches are over. You don't want to miss any clues to defeating Kuyo if she gets through; she's Deidara of the Bakuton's prize pupil, after all.

[X] You'll visit now; you've left the bullet issue long enough.
 
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FurikoMaru said:
Shit... this is beyond Hien. This-

Has Shintenshin written all over it.

... someone just made it into the top three.

Elaborate? Or is Lupin saying we should Shitenshin the puppet or something, and now Ino wants to fight Kankuro in the finals?

"But they aren't the eyes of a killer."

Sooo close to Metal Gear Solid reference and rookie eyes.


"Apparently we make 'em Kazekage," Gaara says dryly.

Buuuuuuuuurn.




[X] You'll visit now; you've left the bullet issue long enough.


I think Ami wants to visit Kiba and while we may get more hints from being here ourselves, I think our friends will keep watch for us. I suspect the Sand Sibs wouldn't mind filling us in on Sound either if we asked afterwards, should the matches start earlier than expected.

That or Furiko wants to skip writing some matches and this is a good excuse. :p
 
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Hymn of Ragnarok said:
Elaborate? Or is Lupin saying we should Shitenshin the puppet or something, and now Ino wants to fight Kankuro in the finals?
You know how we talk about ghetto-Jyuuken? This setup looks like ghetto-Shintenshin.

Hymn of Ragnarok said:
Sooo close to Metal Gear Solid reference and rookie eyes.
>: < "They're transplants!"

Hymn of Ragnarok said:
Self-burn across the multiverse. That is how a Gaara do.
 
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....Actually why wasn't that match called in Shika's favor? He had Kankuro dead to rights, even if Shika wasn't willing to kill him for the sake of what's essentially an exhibition match. If Shika had decide to go some throat slitting instead of go for the surrender there was just about jack Kankuro could do to stop it.
 
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Hymn of Ragnarok said:
....Actually why wasn't that match called in Shika's favor? He had Kankuro dead to rights, even if Shika wasn't willing to kill him for the sake of what's essentially an exhibition match. If Shika had decide to go some throat slitting instead of go for the surrender there was just about jack Kankuro could do to stop it.
Same reason Kankuro's match in canon wasn't called in what's-his-specs' favour; at the last minute, the ref noticed who actually had the upper hand, there.
 
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FurikoMaru said:
Same reason Kankuro's match in canon wasn't called in what's-his-specs' favour; at the last minute, the ref noticed who actually had the upper hand, there.

So...wait, did Shikamaru have Kankuro's puppet at his mercy instead of the real Kankuro? Cause if it was the real Kankuro, and the only reason Shikamaru didn't win when the puppet threw shuriken at the lights was unwillingness to kill, then it sounds like Shikamaru had the upperhand.

Now if Kankuro pulled a double-con with him and his puppet, different story.
 
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Shika should have made a slight cut across the throat as soon as he had control instead of trying to get Kankuro to concede (and illustrating his weakness that allowed Kankuro to take out the lights). The former would have been a 'win' probably.

Forgot to vote:

[X] You'll visit now; you've left the bullet issue long enough.
 
Hymn of Ragnarok said:
That....is an extremely good point. I wonder if we'd be offending him by warning Shikamaru? Or at least by indelicately phrasing it.

I don't see Shika vaulting into the ring, we probably have time to get close for a couple of words.


we don't need to shout "lol don't get yo ass capped, mah nigga!" across the whole room.



EDIT:how the fuck did I miss another entire update?


Is it just not telling me when theres an extra page or something?
 
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I wonder why Ami was crying. Did she get lectured about the fact she set the ceiling on fire?
 
[X] You'll visit now; you've left the bullet issue long enough.

Ok, about the fight, I thought Shika caught the real Kankuro, but his puppet moved independently (because of Shintenshin bullshit?) and took out the lights, thus ending Shika's technique (no light = no shadow) am I wrong on this?



Also, important question that i can't believe nobody has asked.


If the puppet is the product of some sort of Shintenshin rip-off, then who's fucking soul is inside the puppet?
 
iamnuff said:
Ok, about the fight, I thought Shika caught the real Kankuro, but his puppet moved independently (because of Shintenshin bullshit?) and took out the lights, thus ending Shika's technique (no light = no shadow) am I wrong on this?
Yes. It was the puppet. Kankuro has just worked out a personal system whereby in combat, no one can really be sure which is which, in part by using Shintenshin bullshit. He's lucky Hayate's gut told him which was the real person and he went with it instead of calling the match.
 
FurikoMaru said:
Yes. It was the puppet. Kankuro has just worked out a personal system whereby in combat, no one can really be sure which is which, in part by using Shintenshin bullshit. He's lucky Hayate's gut told him which was the real person and he went with it instead of calling the match.

Hayate's lucky too, it'd be damn embarrassing for the special jounin to have been fooled like that.

Also, was your little snippet implying that only Sarutobi was sure which was the real Kankuro from beginning to end? At least of Konoha jounin? If so, damn Kankuro that's amazing. Though I suppose Asuma, Gai, an Kakashi weren't in the room so we don't have much basis for comparison.

I want to know how Kankuro figured this out, if exposure to Gaara had that many benefits and insights or if Kankuro is a reincarnation too.
 
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Huh.

I thought it was just a human puppet, with a side of cloning.

Although Puppet Clones sound remarkably believable...
 
[X] Ami, keep an eye on the bloodthirsty psychos for me~! I'm gonna check in on Kiba.
 
Hymn of Ragnarok said:
Hayate's lucky too, it'd be damn embarrassing for the special jounin to have been fooled like that.

Also, was your little snippet implying that only Sarutobi was sure which was the real Kankuro from beginning to end? At least of Konoha jounin? If so, damn Kankuro that's amazing.
Kurenai couldn't tell, Hayate was pretty sure but didn't want to make a bad call in front of an international audience, Asuma was likewise pretty sure but didn't know, Gai would have known instantly if he'd been present and so would Kakashi, Anko saw through it about the time Shikamaru did, Zabuza has an assassination style that means he lives or dies by his ability to find the people he's going to kill instead of their decoys, Deidara was fooled, and Sarutobi noticed which was which the minute Kankuro took his place in the crowd to hear his speech and never lost track after that point.
 
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Man we NEED to find some way to learn under Kakashi. Or work with him or become his friend. Naruto, Shino, and Sasuke clearly do not appreciate that which they have been given.

I'm sorry Furiko, Asuma is more badass than expected and is probably the most well-adjusted of all the jounin not Sarutobi, but I like unbalanced people with a second course of undiluted awesome.

Trolling is also nice. Along with top-notch skill.

Admittedly, Asuma actually takes the time to train us. But you just know Ino and Kakashi would get on like a house on fire.

....Well, Kakashi's team isn't in the exams, maybe Kakashi would be free to bug? Or we enter a relationship of utility in which we study Kakashi and Kakashi uses us to troll his students.



Guile said:
They don't hand out the title 'God of Shinobi' in crackerjack boxes, that's for sure.

....

Quaker Oats lied to me.
 
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Hymn of Ragnarok said:
Man we NEED to find some way to learn under Kakashi. Or work with him or become his friend. Naruto, Shino, and Sasuke clearly do not appreciate that which they have been given.

I'm sorry Furiko, Asuma is more badass than expected and is probably the most well-adjusted of all the jounin not Sarutobi, but I like unbalanced people with a second course of undiluted awesome.

Trolling is also nice. Along with top-notch skill.

Admittedly, Asuma actually takes the time to train us. But you just know Ino and Kakashi would get on like a house on fire.

....Well, Kakashi's team isn't in the exams, maybe Kakashi would be free to bug? Or we enter a relationship of utility in which we study Kakashi and Kakashi uses us to troll his students.
Probably not impossible, given Asuma will be training Ami, but we'll probably spend a lot of time with the family techniques.
Hymn of Ragnarok said:
....

Quaker Oats lied to me.
If that were their ad campaign, I'd probably have bought in.
 
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Guile said:
Probably not impossible, given Asuma will be training Ami, but we'll probably spend a lot of time with the family techniques.

This....is true. We need to get past Mind-Body Switch sooner or later, and with Lupin and his memories around Throne has taken a massive leap in utility. Also Ranton. We've been beaten over the head enough.

And if stuff like hanging out with Kibi or the Sand Sibs costs or slot, or further spying on the competition costs stuff, well, our purchases quickly become out of control.

If that were their ad campaign, I'd probably have bought in.

Yup. Like General Mills and the Lucky Charms or Fruit Loops. They know how to sucker their audience.
 
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I just went with the 'Oatmeal is good for you, and also tastes pretty good with some honey and stuffs' thing when I wanted hot cereals. Although I wouldn't say no to getting a free shuriken in every box, honestly...
 
FurikoMaru said:
[X] Standing on the corner feeling blue
Judy Garland-Me and My Shadow

FurikoMaru said:
"I can't believe I doubted you, you madwoman," you say cheerfully, slipping in beside Ami along the railing. "Congratulations on completely mindfucking the opposition."
She wants to smile, you can tell, but she's still pissed enough at you to hide it.
"Thank you," she says coolly. "Are you done playing footsie with bloodthirsty battle junkies?"
You smirk. "If I were, I'd have to stop playing with you, now, wouldn't I?"
Ah-ah-ah, there's the grin. Yeah, you've still got it. 8)
Positive reinforcement, gotcha.
Asuma will play Bad Cop soon enough.

FurikoMaru said:
Menka jumps from your shoulder to hers and gets some pets for his trouble.
Hey there.
I was wondering where you went.

FurikoMaru said:
"Ami," Asuma says, nodding in the direction of the hallway, and after a small moment's hesitation she follows him out.
And here comes the critique.
I suspect Neji is getting the same treatment from Gai, seeing as these jounin don't seem to suffer the shonen-induced stupidity of canon.

FurikoMaru said:
That's insane! I mean I knew before the puppet had something like a chakra system, that's why I didn't notice it was a puppet at first during the written test, but I thought it was a- I don't know, some kind of multi-seal array to throw off sensors! Or a don't-look-at-this-too-closely genjutsu! Fuck! Can that thing use jutsu?
*snip*
Shit... this is beyond Hien. This-
Has Shintenshin written all over it.
Ghetto Shintenshin, then, possibly limited to prepared targets.

FurikoMaru said:
"Ready when you are," Kankuro says, hands in his pockets.
"That's my line," Shikamaru replies, echoing the pose.
Heh.

FurikoMaru said:
"I know you're the real one," Shikamaru tells the puppet, and sure enough, its - his - eyes widen.
Along with yours. Holy crap. He's right.
"The tension in the wires connecting you is pulling in the wrong direction for you to be the puppet," he explains. "And even if they weren't, the one back there doesn't have the normal ease of movement that a real human does; I haven't seen him blink once since we got down here." He lifts the handle in his hand to his throat. "Concede and I'll let you live."
Kankuro laughs under his breath. "You've got good eyes, kid."
Macho posturing ahoy!
But yeah, given first her missing Suigetsu's gender and now this, Ino does have to step up her non-chakra observation skills.

FurikoMaru said:
Behind him, with blinding speed, the puppet throws a brace of shuriken at the lights, and for the second time in ten minutes, the room goes dark, save for the soft, indirect light from the broken windows.
You can dimly make out Kankuro - or, wait, is it the puppet?! ARGH! - as he rushes Shikamaru and knocks him unconscious.
Yup.
Ghetto-Shintenshin for sure.
That suggests he may well have a Throne running as well, since it's not a Yamanaka exclusive technique.
Best not to hit him with the Basilisk then.

Kinda surprised Shika's Kagemane failed while there was still light, even if indirect.
He could hold multiple people in canon IIRC.

Truth be told he WAS sloppy; he should have grabbed both the puppet and the man.
Remedial training awaits.
FurikoMaru said:
"Uh... where did the lights go?" Ami asks, returning with Asuma. She's been crying, but not for very long or very hard; if you weren't a sensor you wouldn't be able to tell.
Wow, Asuma is a tough critic.
First Ino, then Kiba.
Guess it was just your turn Ami.

FurikoMaru said:
"He did? Good for him, I always said being a one-trick pony would come back to bite Shikamaru-kun."
I do believe Nara Yoshino will agree with you.
Shika-chan is about to find out that his own apartment is not far enough to keep him free of momkra.

To be fair though, I suspect he might find the motivation to put in more effort.
Especially if Hinata makes it.
FurikoMaru said:
... would you two like to be alone? o_O
No no no Ino.
It's just Guy Love, between two guys
O:)
FurikoMaru said:
"Tch. I was sloppy." Kankuro leans on the railing. "If he were a little older he'd've had me."
"Man, you always worry about the past!" Gaara claps his brother on the back. "You ought to be worrying about the future - like how I'm gonna beat your ass in the finals."
"Pass. I like to keep my organs on the inside, thanks."
"Hey," Ami says to you in a whisper, "you wanna visit Kiba? They'll be working on the lights for a while."
[X] You'll visit him when the matches are over. You don't want to miss any clues to defeating Kuyo if she gets through; she's Deidara of the Bakuton's prize pupil, after all.
[X] You'll visit now; you've left the bullet issue long enough.
Hmm.
There's a good chance that Ami wants to talk on the way.
Then again, we'll run into Neji at the infirmary; not a good time for it IMO.
And I'm worried about Deidara's star pupil.

Then again, we could leave Menka with Choji or Asuma, and go to the infirmary.
Not sure yet.
FurikoMaru said:
Hayate: ...
Kurenai: *purses lips*
Sandaime: The puppet.
Hayate: Ohthankgod. Of course.
Wait, the genjutsu mistress missed it?
Or is Sarutobi just covering Hayate's ass?
 
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I dont think Asuma ripped Ami a new one. I mean yes, he's gonna give it to her straight and he'd probably tell her she shouldn't have fought or didn't do some things right.

At the same time, he's probably gonna make it clear that he's really glad she's alive and relatively unscathed, and that kind of affection is probably gonna make Ami misty eyed.

....Damn that pun was wasted.
 
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[X] You'll visit now; you've left the bullet issue long enough.

Really disappointed Shikamaru lost but I can't see how we could have done anything to help him.
 
uju32 said:
Hey there.
I was wondering where you went.
Not much for him to do in a room full of people who don't know he can talk.

uju32 said:
That suggests he may well have a Throne running as well, since it's not a Yamanaka exclusive technique.
Best not to hit him with the Basilisk then.
Basilisk?

uju32 said:
Kinda surprised Shika's Kagemane failed while there was still light, even if indirect.
He could hold multiple people in canon IIRC.
Yeah, right out in the open sunlight. It wasn't until after the timeskip that he could control someone in a shady area.

uju32 said:
Wait, the genjutsu mistress missed it?
Or is Sarutobi just covering Hayate's ass?
Kankuro is damn good. 8)
 
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FurikoMaru said:

Hit Kankuro with the Throne, we have to make eye contact for it.

I'd still take the risk if we had a fully tricked out Throne though, we're of the Yamanaka clan and the heiress besides. We just need to start applying ourselves properly. He's got some good tricks, but he's not Kibi. I still think we could kick his ass with all of our back-up and the mental static to fuck him up.
 
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