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Cosmos Quest (Naruto/Lupin III)

You go slightly cold. Shisui? But... Shisui can't be dead. Don't be ridiculous. He's only... you don't know how old he is, but he's not old. He's young enough that he doesn't really know how to pick up girls yet. The last time you saw him he was getting a tongue-lashing from his superior about flirting with Yura-nee at Admittance while supposedly on-duty.

[X] Deploy the hug.

You don't even think about it. This isn't like with Weasel, this is Sasuke, and right now his chakra is so twisting and pained and unlike him that you want this to stop now.

You ignore several people's 'OOOoooh's and give Ami an apologetic look and a hold-on hand gesture. Her frown goes from jealous to concerned, and she rushes over.

"Catfight!" Kiba crows. Ami smacks him in the head on her way past.

"Sasuke-kun," she says worriedly, "what's the matter?"

"His cousin passed away," you say in a low voice, releasing him from the hug. Ami's mouth drops open, then closes again in a firm line. She lays a hand on Sasuke's shoulder, and squeezes it, stroking his back with her thumb. For once, he doesn't shrug her off.

You don't mention it, not in front of other people, but there's an extra harmonic to his chakra that tells you he's not actually all that upset about Shisui; there's something else. Maybe something related to his cousin's passing.

It makes sense; you never really got the impression the two of them were close. But...

Okay, you weren't close with Shisui either. He was a skeevy loser.

... no, you think, looking back on your memories, and really looking at them, he wasn't. He was young, and sometimes mean, and sometimes kind.

And now he can't be anything any more, because he's dead.

"How did it happen?" Ami asks quietly.

Sasuke swallows. "... Mom told me it was a mission, but then I heard Dad and some policemen talking to nii-san. They said... he k-killed himself."

What? Bullshit. That doesn't make any sense. It's Shisui. You can't think of anyone less likely to commit suicide.

"If you wanna talk after class," you begin, but Sasuke shakes his head, and you roll your eyes. "All right, fine, if you wanna hit someone after class, let me know and we'll head over to the usual place."

He shakes his head. "I don't want to fight."

"Who're you and what have you done with Uchiha Sasuke?"

"Just leave me alone."

"Denied." You cross your arms. "You're sad, and it's a friend's job to make sure their friends aren't sad. Isn't that so, Ami?"

Ami nods vigourously. "You're not getting rid of me."

"How is that any different from normal with you?" you ask, and she scowls at you.

Ignoring Kiba's clueless muttering about 'Uchiha-hime and her handmaidens', you and Ami spend the rest of class sitting on either side of Sasuke, not really doing anything out of the ordinary, just... providing a buffer zone, you guess. You try to get some schoolwork done, but you can't get your mind off this whole thing.

The longer you think about the situation, the less sense it makes. Shisui might have been secretly depressed or something, but you doubt it. Yeah. It's a coverup. Shisui's either still alive and in hiding for some reason (which would explain Sasuke's mom's 'mission' explanation), or he was murdered. Maybe an A-rank prisoner he brought in (occasionally dumb or not, Shisui was certainly strong) broke out and killed him. Or maybe he was sent out on some mission and did something that made the Clan look bad, so they made him commit seppuku to make amends.

You can't just let this go. Yeah, ninja die all the time - you know that now, you're not three anymore. But there's something about this death in particular that doesn't add up. And you want to know what it is.

But. You're gonna need backup.

[X] Sasuke. Hell, it's his cousin, isn't it? Maybe it'll help his mood to have something to do about it.

[X] Ami. An extra set of eyes never hurts.

[X] Hinata. If you're looking for details and stuff, even a recently-activated Byakugan is going to be a big help.

[X] Kiba. An Inuzuka's nose is pretty sharp. You're sure you can convince him to do Sasuke a favour. (How?)

[X] Shikamaru. He has a habit of noticing things even you would miss; he'll be exceedingly handy to have along.

[X] Write-In?

[X] Fishie. If you're doing this, you're doing this right. No half-measures.

[X] Now that you think about it, you should probably solo this one. If something really big is happening, you don't want to risk getting the others in actual trouble right along with you.



[X] How do you want to go about your investigation?

----------

Right, so, I don't know all that much about Shisui aside from what it's necessary to know, which could make him the single greatest ninja in the history of Naruto. That, along with partial inspiration from Kisame's fanon relationship with Itachi and Itachi's remark that Shisui's ideals are similar to Naruto's, is what made me decide to give him two modes, like most Konoha-nin seem to have; on-a-mission mode, which of course you don't get to see in this story, and hanging-out mode. Is there anything I've written in hanging-out mode that would contradict canon?

I do feel like my Shisui's a bit derivative - there are a lot of slightly goofy dateless wonders in Konohagakure - but I figure, hey, he's not all that much older than Itachi, and his favourite trick is teleporting. To me that speaks of a playful personality that can be turned off when the moment requires it, not a guy who's serious all the time.

*removes hat* Here lies Shisui. He *bamf!*ed fast, and died a virgin.
 
Shisui... I'm not sure if it's fanon that he was colluding with and let Itachi kill him 'For the good of the village' or not, but that is a thing I'd heard. Also, uh, he's good with the shunshin and dead.

Damn, he IS the best Ninja. How much do you want to bet he's secretly still alive, like Tobi?
 
I think the wiki mentioned he did something to his body to make sure his corpse couldn't be used for experimentation, or something. Maybe it wasn't his corpse at all.

And the colluding with Itachi thing is true, so far. If I have my facts right, Shisui didn't want the Clan to rebel because he thought they'd get creamed once the other nations got wind of a Leaf civil war, much like how Itachi wanted to protect the whole village from such a fate. Seeing as he had a once-a-decade brainwashing jutsu built into his eyes, Shisui originally intended to order the others not to rebel, but - sing along, children - Danzo Fucked Everything Up.
 
[X] Sasuke. Hell, it's his cousin, isn't it? Maybe it'll help his mood to have something to do about it.
[X] Ami. An extra set of eyes never hurts.
[X] Hinata. If you're looking for details and stuff, even a recently-activated Byakugan is going to be a big help.
[X] Kiba. An Inuzuka's nose is pretty sharp. You're sure you can convince him to do Sasuke a favour. (How?)
[X] Shikamaru. He has a habit of noticing things even you would miss; he'll be exceedingly handy to have along.

You can never have too much help. Well, no. You can have too much help. I don't think that 5 people is too much, though.
 
[X] Bring fucking everyone

[X] Who, What, Where, When, Why, and How.

There are 6 of you, there are six objectives. Meet up everyday, but otherwise split up and each of you look for your part. Time to Sherlock Holmes this shit.
 
[X] Ami
Her Uchiha-radar will help. Also, she's a little bit 'ard.
[X] Hey Kiba, want to solve a murder/see a dead body?
I can't help but think that'd be all it would take to get him on board.
 
[embed=425,349]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51DjxGrnZzE[/embed]

That said, thinking on vote.

.... Aaand embedding is suddenly not werk.
 
It needs to be embedded with the propper numbas...[embed= 425,349]
 
Wait, one of the options is inviting Naruto? Why we would even consider that? (the Fishie option)

Anyway:

I'm tempted between getting everyone but Kiba (he's an asshole, let's keep him away from Sasuke right now, because he will keep poking the festering wound), everyone including Kiba (his smell can be very useful, and well, maybe discovering something big will make him slightly more sensitive, at least for a little bit), or solo (Something feels wrong here, as much as the others could help, this might be riskier than it sounds)

Either way, the Sasuke trauma train is at full steam and unless we suddenly manage to completely screw canon, it has no stops. :p
 
Felius said:
Wait, one of the options is inviting Naruto? Why we would even consider that? (the Fishie option)

Oh, is that what that meme means? Now I feel foolish. I thought it just meant 'every option proposed is met with a yes'.
 
FurikoMaru said:
Oh, is that what that meme means? Now I feel foolish. I thought it just meant 'every option proposed is met with a yes'.

Hah, no, the Fishe option is a joke about Deviatefishes normal voting style.

Someone just isn't very familiar with some of the BROB goers.
 
Or something so out of left field it makes no sense at all until you contort yourself into frankly unnatural and eldrich positions and read it through the twisted geometries that ensue.

At which point, it makes perfect sense- but now you've got to deal with the Shoggoth on the roof...
 
Okay, so I was right, I just needed different syntax to indicate that I meant 'bring all the friends'.

What are Shoggoths, anyway? They sound like Lovecraft mooks that you gun down on the way to the stuff that's undefeatable and gargle-of-madness-causing.
 
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/83/Shoggoth_by_pahko.jpg

Also, as big as a subway train.

I think they were some Old One servitor race that got out of control.
 
Mou. Drawings of Lovecraft critters are always disappointing. They never make me nuts! What gives?
 
Well, as it happens the internets aren't very good at translating 214th dimensional images into two dimensional ones...
 
The artists lost their shit and drew it wrong.

Animu by Picasso.
 
Chibi-Reaper said:

A seinen series about a hapless bearded poseur wannabe-novelist trying to nail his best friend/much more awesome sidekick's leftovers?

... I'd watch it. It'd be like Ikari Gendo: The College Years.
 
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[X] All the things. Fishie is an inspiration to us all.

Lovecraft wrote at a time when the idea of aliens was scary in and of itself.

A number of his themes were anti-science as well, so he needed to justify the idea that there were things 'man was not meant to know'. The way he did that was by having something that when it was understood actually hurt the person understanding it.

Many of the aliens he wrote about would be considered downright nice by modern society, the kind of species we'd hope to meet. They were, however, still ALIEN, and that was enough to scare his readers. The idea that man was not the ultimate, that he wasn't created by god to be the best, was called on as a source of fear.

TL;DR: Lovecraft was a wuss, and wrote for wusses.
 
I wonder if, in universes where the firmware supports conceptual magic and which include eldritch abominations, you could invent a spell that grants its targets stats.

Because if it has stats, then obviously you can eventually kill it. Solves the problem right then and there.

Well. My main problem with Lovecraft, anyway.
 
Shall I just assume everyone wants to Stand By Me it up and get the whole gang in on the action?
 
If I don't get any more votes in the next half hour I think I'll start writing.

Some plans would be appreciated, as well. Whacha wanna do with these kids now that you have 'em?
 
[X] Do all the things

[X] Trackers look for clues, Lazy boy put them together, Ino directs, while everyone else looks out for danger.
 
[X]Akamaru! Where Are You? Gather Your Pa- UCHIHA INTERRUPT

You scribble a quick note and slip it to Ami. She reads it, then crumples it up and sticks it in her pocket.

The lunch bell takes forever to ring, but when it does, you and Ami nod at each other, and she follows Sasuke out the door. You then make a beeline for your first recruit.

"Hey Kiba. Wanna solve a murder?"

"Seriously?"

"Meet me by that bench on the far side of the obstacle course."

You dash off to find Hinata.

"Sakkun needs our help. Meet me by the bench."

She looks surprised, but nods, and you run back into the classroom, where Shikamaru still hasn't 'woken up' from his most recent nap. You aren't fooled; he drifts in and out, sure, but he's usually at least half awake at any given time.

"Sakkun's cousin is dead and they're saying it was a suicide but that doesn't make any sense. Want to help me figure out what's going on?"

Sure enough, he sits right up and stares at you.

"Repeat that."

You do, with a few details thrown in.

"... did you consider that this Shisui guy's a police officer and the KMP are probably already conducting their own investigation into his death?"

"Not if it was the Uchiha who punched his ticket. What if he found something out and they had to silence him?"

"And now you want to find it out too so they can silence us," Shikamaru says flatly.

... okay, granted, you didn't think this all the way through.

"See?" you say, recovering. "That's why I need you on this one, Shika-chan; you keep me from doing anything too stupid. You're the brains, and I'm the slightly-more-attractive brains."

He sighs, and gets to his feet, "Don't expect me to talk anyone into this. You're on your own with that."

"Hey, how hard could it be to talk people into doing the right thing?"

When you get to the bench, everyone's already there.

"He wasn't murdered!"

Including Sasuke and Kiba.

Ami, to her credit, is trying to hold Sasuke back, although you're not sure if that's just to have an excuse to hug him or not.

You wince. "Sorry, Sakkun; I had to tell him something to get him to come along."

"Come along to what?" Sasuke asks, glaring at you.

"It doesn't make any sense that Shisui would kill himself," you say. "I thought if we all worked together we could figure out why he would do it-"

"What does it matter why he did it? He did, and that's it, end of story!" Sasuke's eyes are screwed shut, and his fists are clenched so tightly there's a vein standing out in his left arm.

"Hey, neko-buta's just trying to help!" Kiba says, frowning.

"Well she can help by going away! All of you can!"

"Maa, Sakkun, don't be like that," you wheedle. "If you don't want us to pry, it's fine, but you can't expect me not to want to try to-"

"To what, boss everyone around like you always do?"

That stings. "To find out if something bad happened to a member of your family so I know how to make sure it doesn't happen to you next!"

"NOTHING HAPPENED!"

You run your fingers through your hair in frustration; that one lock that never likes to stay back falls in your face. "All right, fine. Nothing happened. I'm sorry I wanted to make sure everything's going to be okay before I accidentally lie by telling you it is when it isn't."

"I don't need you to coddle me," he says sullenly.

You roll your eyes. "Yeah, yeah, you're a big tough Uchiha who doesn't need anyone to look after him." You look around awkwardly at everyone else. "Sorry, guys. I guess I called you over here for nothing."

Kiba glares at Sasuke. "I don't blame you; he's the one being an idiot."

Ami promptly belts him one, leaving him doubled over and cursing.

"Your human really can't read a room, can he?" you ask Akamaru wearily.

The white puppy whimpers slightly, as if to say Hey! He has his good points.

"Ino-chan was just worried. And so was I," Hinata tells Sasuke, bowing. "I'm sorry to intrude on private Clan matters. Please forgive me."

Sasuke sighs through his nose, but tells her it's okay.

"... well," Shikamaru says dryly, "this went better than I expected. I was sure Kiba would come out of this with at least some second-degree burns."



How do you want to handle the Shisui conspiracy?

[X] Hey, you didn't promise you wouldn't investigate on your own. Full speed ahead.
->[X] Plan? Good thing to have, yes?
[X] Let it drop, but be on the lookout for weird stuff going on in the village.
[X] Write in?

----------

If you'll recall, when Sasuke hears about Shisui's death, he hears the allegations that Itachi's to blame at the same time (at least in the anime; I didn't know which chapters to read to research this arc). He doesn't want any investigation that might prove his brother's guilt.
 
[X] Hey, you didn't promise you wouldn't investigate on your own. Full speed ahead.
--[x]cats are our allies and we are a sensor. And have some good chakra-non-reliant stealth. Use all of that.
----[x]If possible, get a look at Shisui's body.
 
[X] Hey, you didn't promise you wouldn't investigate on your own. Full speed ahead.

[x]Stalk Weasel. Ask the cats to help you find him if you must. When he inevitably confronts you, ask him what is going on?

We're not getting close to anything sensitive, ever. Best option is to try and talk to Itachi. We know him, at least.
 
(x) This is going to go against the grain but we could get tossed in jail, see what we hear. It's practically our home away from home,and the uchiha are on edge. It wouldn't take much.
(x) Stalking Weasel with our masks is a good plan B for when plan A fails.
 
The problem is it would make IC Sense for us to talk with weasel about it, he is the victims best friend and we sort of like him /made him our project sometimes..
 

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