[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[SpaceK0k0nut]

half dragons when powerful enough can utilize actual magic...and hey imagine if Jaune actually became a full on dragon...

oh boy...does this mean Jaunes dad had enough Rizz to actually not only get a DND RED DRAGON as his wife, but also changed her alignment towards true neutral? Man is a LEGEND of a farmer.

still, imagine what puns Yang can pull out, as well as Ruby getting *IDEAS* for her mecha-shift scythe...Weiss will get some form of a idea on proper decorum because a dragon is a hefty ally to have.

Blake? She needs help, like holy christ she needs help.

Pyrrha is basically going to be a bit confused for a moment before realizing she has a type...and jaune hits them all.

what would be more hilarious if his mom was a Demi-Godess of Tiamat, so Grandma wanting to have the kids visit would be a...intresting time.

Click to shrink...

or worse: Grandma hears about Jaune being at Beacon and comes over for a... social call with her old acquientance/enemy Ozma...

 

[LordofBones]

or worse: Grandma hears about Jaune being at Beacon and comes over for a... social call with her old acquientance/enemy Ozma...

Click to shrink...

Tiamat stomps, nothing can stop her. Grandma is likely to give zero shits about Ozma.

 

[SpaceK0k0nut]

Tiamat stomps, nothing can stop her. Grandma is likely to give zero shits about Ozma.

Click to shrink...

except DND is an RPG system and bullshit is a dime a dozen, so one ancient wizard being able to match and banish Tiamat is perfectly reasonable.
Especially when said wizard has the blessings if 2 major gods

 

[LordofBones]

except DND is an RPG system and bullshit is a dime a dozen, so one ancient wizard being able to match and banish Tiamat is perfectly reasonable.
Especially when said wizard has the blessings if 2 major gods

Click to shrink...

One ancient wizard who is a shadow of his former self. Tiamat is a spellcaster herself, has her own innate magical resistance, and can literally alter reality. Ozma has never shown anything that puts him on par with any of the bullshit reality warpers of D&D, much less a true deity like Tiamat. The Dark Queen of Dragons is an out of context problem for Remnant.

Also, if we're going by "rule-based system", then Remnant is shit out of luck. Tiamat is a lesser deity, and is thus immune to any effect that would banish or imprison her.

I just can't wrap my head around the notion that dragon!Jaune is somehow invitation for one of the most malevolent deities in D&D to come visit. Dozens of fictional dragons, and ya'll fixate on the one that lives in Hell.

 

[RandomDragon]

True, but it's more of a crack that "grandma doesn't have much to do so she lets her hair down on this tiny/puny world occasionally to see if half dragon-Demi gods can be a thing", as well as basically it's a vacation place away from the bullshit that's DND where she can "relax", I.E play around a bit occasionally.

that and it allows her split 5 way personalities to do their own thing occasionally…this time it's Red's Turn for relaxation…

plus Jayne unconsciously projecting "this is mine" about team Rwby, Pyrrha, and his teammates amuses me to no end. (Nora and Reno are designated as crazy minions, while the rest of the girls are also minions but potential future mates)

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Alternatively...

- - -

Jaune and Blake were concerned when they saw Cardin and Velvet head off towards an unoccupied section of Beacon's dorms. The bully had the rabbit faunus' hand in a tight grip as they headed off. Blake, being a keen warrior of justice, and Jaune, wanting to be a hero, followed them stealthily. Well, Blake was stealthy. Jaune was doing his best.

They watched Velvet and Cardin vanish into an empty dorm room. The two stalked up and took up positions on either side of the door.

"On three, we bust in and save Velvet," Blake stated. Jaune nodded.

"Right!"

"Ready... THREE!" Blake declared.

"Wait, aren't you supposed to count-?"

Blake kicked the door in and stormed in. Jaune followed.

"All right Winchester, you're... Done...?"

"NO HE'S NOT!" A naked Velvet shouted at her. "KEEP GOING HONEY! I WANT TRIPLETS!"

Blake and Jaune gaped at the human and Faunus in a... Very indelicate state. Cardin coughed awkwardly.

"Uhhh... Soooo-"

"YOU'RE DATING?!" Jaune gasped.

"YES!" Velvet shouted. "NOW GET OUT!"

"But-But-You hate Faunus!" Blake sputtered.

"No, I said 'Fuck the Faunus'," Cardin pointed out, "I very specifically said that and-"

"ENOUGH TALKING SWEETIE!" Velvet growled, "I'M IN HEAT SO GET ON WITH IT OR I'LL MAKE YOU THE WOMAN!"

"On it, Honeybunny!"

"Oh I love you so much, sweetie!" Velvet cooed. "NOW GET TO WORK!"

Blake and Jaune quickly exited, and shut the door behind them. Both wore red faces.

"I... Uh... Um... Wow," Blake managed.

"Y-Yeah," Jaune muttered. He coughed. "Uhh... So..."

"Let's... Pretend this never happened," Blake decided.

"Agreed."

 

[RandomDragon]

I'll have a snippet out soon…my muse is threatening me in the corner of my mind lol, but yeah…figures it's the quiet one.

as well as why velvets team didn't interfere with the bullying.

as long as he didn't go too far anyway.

 

[LordofBones]

Jaune: "... Um... Okay... So... I can explain-"

Blake: "You're... You're a faunus?!"

Ruby: "A dragon faunus?!"

Jaune: "NO! I mean, not that there's anything wrong with being a faunus but that's not what I am!"

Pyrrha: "Then... What are you, Jaune? And know that we will never, ever judge you for what it is, because you're Jaune to us and we love you! Platonically!"

Jaune: "Thanks Pyrrha, that really helps and I really appreciate-"

Weiss: "WHAT ARE YOU JAUNE?!"

Jaune: "I'm a dragon."

Weiss: "A... A dragon... Faunus?"

Jaune: "No, just a dragon. Well, part-dragon. As in the magical creature, yeah. My mom's a dragon, and my dad's a human."

Yang: "... So your dad-"

Jaune: "Slew a dragon with his mighty sword, yeah, he's made the same joke for seventeen years, Yang. SEVENTEEN. YEARS."

Click to shrink...

More ideas:

-There are more mythological half-breeds running around in Remnant, and Blake is accidentally racist by referring to stereotypes. Lumping in all those half-dragons, half-kitsune, half-sirens and whatnot with faunus is horribly racist and offensive to to them.
-Cardin, of all people, is hilariously chill with Jaune being a half-dragon and mythological creatures in general. He's just racist against faunus, that's all.
-Pyrrha hilariously misjudges the whole "dragons kidnap princesses" thing - nowadays, dragons are more likely to boff the hot tomboy in full armor than the shrill noblewoman.
-Jaune has to defend his vintage hoard against collectors and Ruby's grubby little mitts.
-Yang the Barbarian, complete with chainmail bikini. She's going to get her very own dragon mount, one way or the other.
-Jaune's parents come to visit.

 

[SpaceK0k0nut]

One ancient wizard who is a shadow of his former self. Tiamat is a spellcaster herself, has her own innate magical resistance, and can literally alter reality. Ozma has never shown anything that puts him on par with any of the bullshit reality warpers of D&D, much less a true deity like Tiamat. The Dark Queen of Dragons is an out of context problem for Remnant.

Also, if we're going by "rule-based system", then Remnant is shit out of luck. Tiamat is a lesser deity, and is thus immune to any effect that would banish or imprison her.

I just can't wrap my head around the notion that dragon!Jaune is somehow invitation for one of the most malevolent deities in D&D to come visit. Dozens of fictional dragons, and ya'll fixate on the one that lives in Hell.

Click to shrink...

Because the dichotomy between "fire, brimstone and suffering" Tiamat and "overly dotting grandma" Tiamat is fucking hilarious.

Also, DM always has final say, so if you want your lore-compliant Tiamat in this crack snippet collection, go right ahead and dont let me stop you

 

[AndrewJTalon]

- - -

The Vytal Festival had fallen into complete chaos. Vale was under attack. Atlas' robots had gone mad... And now Adam was here. He'd cornered her in the library. She'd tried to protect a human and all she'd gotten was injured. She tried to push herself up, but Adam kicked her in the ribs.

"GYAH!"

"You deserve this, my love," Adam seethed. He lifted his blood red katana up. Blake shut her eyes tightly.

No... Please... Not now...!
SHING!

She reopened them. A pair of boots filled her vision. She looked up, and up, and up...

A seven foot tall man in jeans, wearing white and black armor on his torso, with blond hair and a massive white and black bastard sword, stood in front of her. Adam had jumped back, seething back at the newcomer.

"Who the hell are you?!"

The older man sighed, and shook his head slowly.

"Miss Belladonna, right?" He asked in a deep, pleasant baritone.

"Y-Yes," Blake managed.

"My son wrote about you to me," he said. He glanced back at her, and smiled. If not for the luxurious beard, the lines around his eyes, and the scars on his cheek, Blake would swear she was looking at an older version of Jaune Arc.

"Name's Nick Arc," he said, "Used to be a Huntsman, too." He turned his eyes back to Adam. "My wife and I were rooting for our son in the stands... When all this happened."

"Run," Blake urged, "Please! He's-He'll kill you-!"

"If he does, then he'll have earned it," Nick grunted.

Adam struck furiously, lashing out with incredible speed. With equal speed though, Nick swung the much longer sword like it weighed nothing, parrying and deflecting Adam's fearsome blows with loud reports of straining steel.

"YO! BLONDIE!" Nick shouted. Blake spotted Yang out of the corner of her eye.

"Yeah?!" Yang shouted back.

"Your partner needs medical attention! My wife's trying to set up a safe zone nearby! Go help her!" He barked. "I'll handle him."

"But-!"

"GO!" Nick shouted. Yang nodded, scooped Blake up, and ran out as fast as she could.

Blake looked over Yang's shoulder, biting her lower lip as Adam's katana glowed bright red.

- - -

"You're signing your own death warrant, old human," Adam snarled. "What?! You wanted them to have a head start? Once I kill you, I'll just find and kill them both."

Nick sighed.

"No, idiot," he stated, "I just don't want any civilians around when I cut loose."

His Aura exploded like a bonfire around him, as he swung his blade right into the ground. A massive blast of Aura energy erupted right at Adam! The White Fang leader barely got his Aura up long enough to block, but the force still blasted him through the walls of the library, and right out onto the green grounds surrounding Beacon. He staggered up, and barely got his sword up in time to keep Nick's sword from slicing him in half.

Adam leaped back, and swung Wilt to unleash a massive Moonslice right at him.

"DIE!" Adam snarled,

It was so wide, no human was fast enough to dodge it!

And Nick Arc didn't. His sword glowed brightly with Aura, and he swung hard. The Moonslice broke into two beams. They lapped at Arc's burly arms, leaving deep cuts that drew blood, but otherwise the human warrior was unharmed.

"Who... Who are you?! WHAT ARE YOU?!" Adam demanded in shock.

Nick just shook his head, and held up his blade.

"I'm an old man in a profession where most die young," he stated, "And you have my undivided attention, terrorist scum."

- - -

There are many shonen anime with competent adults who pass the torch to the next generation or are defeated for believable reasons. RWBY has no competent adults and doesn't know how to write them while still letting the bad guys win. So that's one goal of mine with my RWBY fic: To balance the old by showing them as competent and powerful, but also to show the younger generation stepping up.

 

[Barboza]

Publishing this idea. Jaune used to have a childhood friend who desired to be a Hustman with him, but he got an illness or a problem like cancer in the brain. His family didn't tell it to anyone, but Jaune learned about it, then the two of them started to do a lot of things in order to enjoy the time they have, in a moment around their 15 years, Jaune got hurt by a Grimm attack and he was in a dangerous stage, his friend suicide in order to save his life. Then when Jaune appears in Beacon he will have eterocronique eyes, the hair has different color in some places and he has a fabolous scar in the tórax that shine with his friend aura when he is on a fight ( like Siegfried from fgo) he will have two semblances, one is his original an the other is a clone from his friend. The main song of the idea is "Brother"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Also, the adults sharing funny stories of their youth (aside from just Port) would have been fun and led potentially to a lot of fun hijinks, drama, and character building moments.

I may put this into the "In a Family Way" story or another one:

- - -

Isabel Arc smiled warmly at Ruby. Ever since she'd met the little prodigy, she'd been taken with her. She reminded her so much of her daughters at this age... And a little bit of Jaune, too.

"So, what can I do for you today, Ruby?" Isabel asked. "Want to bake cookies again today? I do have time."

"I'd love to!" Ruby chirped, "But uh... I was wondering if you could tell me about my mom? My dad and uncle have all sorts of stories, but you also knew her, right?"

Isabel smiled and nodded.

"I did. We weren't super close, but we were friends," she said. She sighed. "Though she could be a major headache. I was... A bit more rules-oriented than she was. And very serious..."

She sighed.

"And she could be... A bit annoying."

"How?" Ruby asked.

- - -

In the past...

"I'm soooo borrrrred, Isabel!" Summer whined, lying on the senior's bed and kicking her legs up into the air. Isabel Arc, Summer's "senpai" (Whatever that meant) did her homework at her desk nearby.

"Don't you have a team to be annoying?" Isabel sighed.

"They're all busy," she whined, "And Raven's being mean again!" She beamed. "Hey! Can I bug your boyfriend?"

"He's not my boyfriend!" Isabel said, perhaps a bit too quickly. Summer grinned. "Okay, he's... Kind of my boyfriend?"

"I mean, you are going on trips all the time," Summer pointed out.

"He's an orphan and he needed work," Isabel coughed, "He gets along well with my town militia. That's all!"

"Annnnd...?" Summer prompted with a grin.

"And we're not having this conversation," she stated. Summer popped up and leaned over her shoulder.

"Come onnnnn!"

"No."

"Come onnnnnn!"

"No."

"I want juicy girl gossip!" Summer whined. "Raven's all hardcore and meeeeaaaan!"

"Well, too bad, I don't gossip," Isabel sniffed.

Summer pouted.

"... What if we could prank Raven?"

Isabel sniffed.

"I'm far too mature to stoop to such a level-"

Summer stared at her.

"It's Raven."

Isabel sighed.

"... What did you have in mind?"

Summer beamed.

Later...

Summer and Isabel made it to her dorm and sat down. They began to do actual homework, enjoying the peaceful silence of the late afternoon.

The peace of Beacon Academy was shattered by a blood-curdling cry.

A moment later, Raven Branwen, the scariest first year at Beacon Academy, stormed in and snarled.

"SUMMER ROSE! I KNOW YOU HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS?!"

Summer and Isabel glanced at the now platinum blonde Raven. Summer snorted, trying to hold back laughter.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Summer managed. "But it looks good on you!"

Raven roared in rage. Isabel rolled her eyes.

"Come on. It's obvious that it couldn't have been Summer," Isabel stated, "She was with me the whole time."

"Then who-?!"

Nick walked in, smiling broadly as he held up an empty bottle.

"Hey Isabel! I finished with the blonde hair dye!" He said cheerfully. "Don't even know why you had it, but... Uh..."

He blinked at the aura of unfathomable rage now billowing out of Raven. He coughed.

"I'm sure this is all a big misunderstanding-"

"DIE!"

- - -

Ruby and Isabel giggled.

"Oh, poor Nick," Isabel sighed, "But we made it up to him later... Well..." She winked in a saucy way, "I did."

Ruby made a face.

"Ewww... You don't have to tell me that kind of stuff!"

Isabel hummed.

"What if it would help you with my son?"

Ruby blushed bright red.

"W-W-We're just friends! Friends! Super besties! Really and truly!"

Isabel raised an elegant eyebrow, then nodded.

"All right..."

"But," Ruby said quickly, "J-Just in case I ever... Change my mind...?"

Isabel hid her smile.

The more things change... She thought fondly.

- - -

Isabel being around means there's an actual mother figure for our heroes to have. Jaune may be mortified when his friends start gravitating to her for maternal affection and advice. And when they look to his dad for a father figure... Well. Poor guy.

 

[Ovid]

Arcs: "We are the Arcs. Remove your traumas and surrender your beds. We will add your lonely souls and hearts to our family. You will become one of us, by marriage, adoption, or breeding. Resistance will be met with head pats and cuddles."

(I tried to keep the general cadence of the Borg, so please excuse any oddities in word choice.)

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Isabel smiled and nodded.

"I did. We weren't super close, but we were friends," she said. She sighed. "Though she could be a major headache. I was... A bit more rules-oriented than she was. And very serious..."

She sighed.

"And she could be... A bit annoying."

Click to shrink...

You know that saying, about how men look for women like their mother's?

Isabel was the previous generations Weiss.....

Weiss - "You mean you were chasing after me because you thought I would make a good mother?"

Jaune - "Well, your really smart and hard working too, in addition to being really pretty!"

Weiss - "...."

*********

Pyrrha - "I have felt a great disturbance in the Force...."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

You know that saying, about how men look for women like their mother's?

Isabel was the previous generations Weiss.....

Weiss - "You mean you were chasing after me because you thought I would make a good mother?"

Jaune - "Well, your really smart and hard working too, in addition to being really pretty!"

Weiss - "...."

*********

Pyrrha - "I have felt a great disturbance in the Force...."

Click to shrink...

Of course...

Nick: "So, tried chasing the ice princess, huh son?"

Jaune: "Er... Well, yeah. She reminds me a lot of Mom. Is that weird?"

Nick: "Maybe a little. But you know, there are other things about your mom I fell in love with. Her strength, her snarky sense of humor, her beautiful blonde hair, and her determination to protect her siblings and anyone else she cared about."

Jaune: "Really...? Huh..."

Nick: nods "Don't hyperfocus on just the superficial, Jaune. You're you, not me."

Jaune: "Thanks Dad..."

He goes up to Yang.

Jaune: "Hey Yang. Wanna train together?"

Yang: "Well..."

Jaune: "I really want to get better at hand to hand. And I can't think of a better teacher, or a prettier one."

Yang: blush "... Huh. Okay, Vomit Boy! For the flattery? Sure thing!"

Jaune: "Thanks!"

Yang: "I'm not going to take it easy on you!"

Jaune: "Good. I wouldn't have it any other way!"

- - -

Pyrrha: "ANOTHER ONE?!"

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Pyrrha: "ANOTHER ONE?!"

Click to shrink...

Qrow and Pyrrha team up.

A Bar Near Beacon​

Qrow - "It's just my luck another blonde playboy shows up for Yang & Ruby's generation, well, I'm not having it!"

Pyrrha - "If only there was someway to take Jaune's attention away from those other girls..."

Qrow - "You..."

Pyrrha - "too?"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Jaune, Blake, Velvet, Ren, Sun, and Cardin sit in a room. Cardin and Velvet sit on one side of a large table, while Blake and Sun sit on the other side. Jaune and Ren sit in the middle. Cardin is glaring at Blake, a glare Blake returns, while Velvet looks concerned and nervous while Sun is laying back in his chair. Jaune looks exasperated but determined while Ren is his usual stoic self.

Jaune: "Okay... Thank you for coming. Let's all just take a breath, not get upset-"

Cardin: "She ruined Velvet's birthday party!"

Blake: "Well EXCUSE ME for thinking you were being racist!"

Cardin: "I WASN'T! Velvet loves carrot cake! I got her a carrot cake!"

Blake: "Is it my fault she's a stereotype?!"

Velvet: "I wouldn't-I just like carrot cake, all right?! Why is that bad?! Lots of humans like carrot cake!"

Cardin: "I was trying to make my girlfriend happy, Blake! That is the opposite of racism!"

Blake: "How do you know it's not unconsciously racist?!"

Cardin: "BECAUSE THE ONLY THING I WANT IS TO MAKE MY GIRLFRIEND HAPPY! SHE TOLD ME SHE LIKES CARROT CAKE! I GOT HER CARROT CAKE!"

Jaune: "Okay, chill out Cardin. No yelling, that won't help."

Velvet: "The little orange and green carrots made of cream were very nice, Cardin."

Cardin; "Thanks babe. I thought that baking class my mom made me do was useless but I'm glad it came in handy."

Sun: "Besides, you can't really talk, Blake."

Blake: "What do you mean?"

Ren: "He means that you're basically a stereotype yourself."

Blake: "What?! I-I am not!"

Jaune holds up a laser pointer and shines a beam near Blake. She bats at it for a moment... Before blushing.

Blake: "I-So I'm embracing my animal instincts! That-That's just part of who I am! I'm not hiding who I am!"

Sun: "Ahem...?" Points at the bow

Blake: "WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON ANYWAY?!"

Sun: "I'm just being a bro!"

Blake: "Over being a good boyfriend?!"

Sun: "Being a good boyfriend means I stand up to you when you're being unreasonable, right?"

Blake: "I was NOT being unreasonable to assume that the racist guy was being racist to his girlfriend on her birthday!"

Jaune: "Ummmmmm..."

Blake: "I-I mean... Carrots... And rabbits..."

Velvet: "Actually rabbits don't eat carrots much in the wild, Blake. That's just a stereotype from cartoons. If you feed rabbits nothing but carrots, they'll die from diabetes."

Cardin: "HA! Who's the racist stereotyping person now, Blake?"

Blake: "..." siiiiighs "I'm... Very sorry, Velvet."

Velvet: "And....?"

Blake: "I'm... Very sorry, Cardin. I shouldn't be so... Hypersensitive about certain things."

Cardin: "Ha! You really shouldn't you-!"

Velvet elbows him. He gives her a pleading look. She shakes her head. He sighs.

Cardin: "... Apology accepted."

Velvet: smiles happily

Jaune: "Well, it's good you guys were able to talk this out."

Velvet: "Yup! Now..." grabs Cardin's bicep "I am so proud of you, Cardin honey! Let's go make like rabbits!"

Cardin: "WOOHOO!"

Blake: "Wha-But-!"

Sun: rests a hand over hers "Deep breaths, deep breaths..."

Blake: "Nnnnngh...!"

 

[SamRand0]

Blake whenever she sees a happy Human and Faunus relationship: REEEEEE

 

[EgyptianDio]

Can we please have a snippet of the teams meeting Kali and being surprised that it's only Blake who is a cat stereotype.

 

[SamRand0]

Can we please have a snippet of the teams meeting Kali and being surprised that it's only Blake who is a cat stereotype.

Click to shrink...

Spoiler: Kali

 

[LordofBones]

Blake whenever she sees a happy Human and Faunus relationship: REEEEEE

Click to shrink...

Yang: "So, before I kick your ass, I have to know..."

Adam: "No, I am not enraged by the color red, and I liked that Bugs Bunny episode with the bull. Now can I kill you?"

Yang: "So, that's all Blake being-"

Adam: "Hilariously racist? You have no idea how often she picked fights with canine faunus."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Blake meets with Jaune, who has been "designated" as the guy to help her with her issues.

Jaune: What did I do to deserve this?

Blake: "I-I mean... So much human media has been hurtful towards Faunus! Is it my fault so much of it can be true?"

Jaune: "Uh huh?"

Blake: "But we made the hurtful stereotypes ours, in the White Fang. To make them ours, take them back from the humans!"

Jaune: "Uh huh."

Blake: "Adam told us to embrace our animal instincts!"

Jaune: "Uh... Huh."

Blake: "He loved red to make himself angry! To hone his anger! Like a bull!"

Jaune: "Bulls are colorblind."

Blake: "... Wait what?!"

Jaune: "Yup. They can't see red, it just looks black to them. They just get mad because of being in an arena where they have to fight to the death."

Blake: "... Chameleons-?"

Jaune; "Don't actually shift colors to blend in, it just denotes their mood."

Blake: "... Wolves-?"

Jaune: "Aren't loners, and when they form packs they're family units, not based on who is the alpha or beta or anything else like that."

Blake: "..." small, despairing laugh "Is... Is my entire life a lie?!"

Jaune: "No! Nonono! It's all right, Blake, it's all right! So you were deceived and... Um..."

Blake: "Stupid?!"

Jaune: "NO! No, I didn't say that! I only know this stuff because my mom and dad were very much in favor of education! Um, I'm sure yours were too-"

Blake: "THEN I'M JUST AN IDIOT?!"

Jaune: "I didn't say that either-!"

Blake: "UWAAAAHHHHHHH!"

Jaune: hugs her and strokes her back "It's okay, Blake, it's okay... You're okay... You're trying to do better..."

Blake: sniffle "Am I good kitty? I want to be a good kitty! I want to be the best kitty ever!"

Jaune: "You're a good kitty... You're a good kitty..."

Blake: "... Can you... Scratch behind my ears?"

Jaune: "Ummmm... Shouldn't... Sun do that...?"

Blake: "He thinks it's weird."

Jaune: "... Okay....?" Scratch scratch scratch

Blake: "Nyaaaahhhh~! Nyyyyyaaaahhhh~!"

Jaune: Okay this is... Very cute... Also weird... Cuweird...

Blake: "Nyaaahhhh~... Master~..."

Jaune: "And now it's completely weird..."

 

[EgyptianDio]

Spoiler: Kali

Click to shrink...

That's only Yang and Ruby, I want the whole cast there!

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Yang, Jaune, Ren, Nora, Weiss, Ruby, Blake and Pyrrha just finished the MOST strenuous workout they have ever had courtesy of Jaune's father, Nick.

Yang: "Urrrgh... I have bruises on my bruises..."

Jaune: "Owwww..."

Pyrrha: "Yesss... This is amazing! I want to do this every day!"

Everyone Else: "NO!"

Nora: "Moron!"

Ren: "Training junky."

Weiss: "Please no more!"

Blake: "Owww..."

Nick: "Hahaha! No, this is enough for now!"

Jaune: "Urgh... Thanks a lot, Dad."

Nick: "Hey, it's tough love. You gotta sweat so you don't bleed! That's what my master told me."

Yang: "Urgh, you sound like my dad..."

Ruby: "Too much like Dad..."

Nick: "HA! He probably stole it from me! We were rivals! ... Sort of!"

Jaune: "What do you mean, 'sort of'?"

Nick: "The truth is, I was a bit too... Free-spirited for my fellow older classmates. So! I took your dad and uncle as my kohais!"

Jaune: "Translation: They were almost as immature as he was."

Nick: "YES!"

In the past... In the STRQ dormroom...

Raven: "I don't see why I can't be leader. I could totally beat up Summer. Or just knife her in the back."

Summer: "I can hear you."

Raven: "Good."

Qrow: "Uggggh... Homework is lame."

Taiyang: "Totally. Can't we go do something fun, Summer?"

Summer: "Not until your homework is done! You too, Raven!"

Raven: "Homework is useless! What matters is who is the strongest!"

Nick busts in.

Nick: "GUYS! GUYS! GUYYYYYSSSS! YOU HAVE NO IDEA-IT'S AMAZING!"

Summer: "What?! What?!"

Taiyang: "What is it, Nick?!"

Nick: "THERE'S A NEW GOAT EXHIBIT AT THE ZOO! WE GOTTA GO!"

Silence.

Taiyang: "... THAT SOUNDS AWESOME!"

Qrow: "I'm game!"

Summer: "A goat?! Count me in!"

Raven: "What."

Summer: "How do we get there?"

Nick: "We can get Isabel to drive us! She has a driver's license!"

Raven: "What's a driver's license-?"

Taiyang: "AWESOME!"

Raven: "What happened to homework?"

Summer: "WHO CARES? IT'S A GOAT!"

Taiyang: "You're sure she'll drive us?"

Nick: "Trust me! She's all heart!"

Later at the zoo...

Isabel: sigh "I can't believe he talked me into this."

Raven: "You're so weak to him! You'll never see me act so pathetically around a man!"

Summer: snerk "Sure Raven, sure."

Raven: "I WON'T!"

The boys are staring into the goat enclosure. The goat is just chewing on something, and making goat noises.

Taiyang: "Heheh... What a silly goat."

Qrow: "Such a silly little guy."

Nick: "I know! He's so cool...!"

Summer: "So cute~!"

Raven: "It's a goat. You can see them in any village around here!"

Qrow: "But he's in a special exhibit. A special goat exhibit, Raven!"

Raven: "... SO?!"

Qrow: "So he must be... A special goat!"

Nick: "The special-est goat!"

Isabel: "That's not a word."

Nick: "Of course it is! Atlas has special-ests!"

Isabel: "No, they're specialists!"

Nick: "What's the difference?"

Isabel: "UGH!"

Taiyang: "HA! I get it!"

Qrow: "Hey... Think we can feed him?"

Isabel: "Uh... No. No you cannot feed him."

Qrow: "Who says?!"

Isabel: "The sign that says 'no feeding the animals'?"

Qrow: "What? That's lame! Hey, wait, does that mean they'd throw food at him if the sign wasn't up?"

Taiyang: "Dude, we should do that! Hold up a sign that says 'Feed the Animals!'"

Qrow: "Cause we're animals!"

Taiyang: "YEAH!"

Summer: "No guys, no, that wouldn't work."

Raven: "Thank you."

Summer: "They'd just throw partially eaten or bad food at you!"

Taiyang: "Oh yeah."

Qrow: "Really? Lame."

Raven: "I-You... What?!"

Isabel: sighs in pity and empathy "In any event, don't feed the goat. It's against the zoo rules-NICK!"

Nick: Threw in his hotdog and cotton candy "What? You say something?"

Isabel: "I-CAN'T YOU READ?!"

Nick: "Yes! I can!"

Isabel: "What does that sign say?!"

Nick: "... 'Don't Feed the Animals'-Ohhhhh..." A pause. He then tosses in his popcorn bucket

Isabel: "NICK!"

Nick: "SORRY! He looks so sad, Isabel! He just wants to eat people food!"

Isabel: "IT'S BAD FOR THEM!"

Nick: "So is junk food for us, but you still eat creampuffs when you think I'm not looking."

Isabel: blush "I DO NOT!"

Zookeeper: "HEY! You aren't feeding the goat, are you?"

Students: "Nooooo..."

The goat throws up a plastic zoo popcorn bucket.

Zookeeper: "..."

Students: "..."

Taiyang: points at Nick "It was his idea!"

Nick: "DUDE! NOT COOL!"

Summer: "RUN!"

In the present...

Nick: "... They did lift our ban a few years ago."

Weiss: "Feeding a goat doesn't sound so bad."

Nick: "It wasn't. But then Raven led us into the tiger den to escape because she wanted to ride a tiger, and hey! That sounded like fun, so I went along!"

Ruby: "... And our mom and dad?"

Nick: "They had to share a tiger. I wasn't sharing mine. Traitor."

 

[Kiyan Tribe]

Man this is comeady gold!

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Pyrrha: "Yesss... This is amazing! I want to do this every day!"

Click to shrink...

Isabel - "If you confess to my son, marry him, and move in with us, I could make that happen....."

Pyrrha - *Determination Intensifies*

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Yang: "So Professor Arc, you have a pretty sweet motorcycle."

Nick: "Thanks!"

Yang: "How did you get it?"

Nick: "Well..."

In the past... Nick is just chilling out near a motorcycle dealership.

Nick: "Doobie doo... Doo doo doo..."

A younger Roman Torchwick drives a motorcycle through the fence and slams it onto Nick's head.

Nick: "GAAAAHHHH!"

Roman: "Oh shit oh shit oh shit! Uh, hey! You still alive?"

Nick: "Uggggggghhhh...!"

Roman: "Good enough for me! I ain't getting a murder charge!" He runs off.

In the present...

Nick: "The dealer and the cops were so impressed I actually survived, they let me have the bike if I promoted how safe they were!"

Yang: "... When one of them fell on your head."

Nick: "Yup."

Yang: "And you survived only because of your absurd amount of Aura."

Nick: "Basically."

Yang: "... Awesome!"

 

[SamRand0]

I immediately thought of Perry's theme when nick was singing his little tune

 

[AndrewJTalon]

This is the future for Cardin or Jaune, whoever marries Velvet.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

- - -

"Aw, thanks Sun!" Weiss cooed, opening her gift. She gasped in joy. "Ooh! Banana cupcakes?"

"Well, I like to give you my banana whenever possible," Sun said with a wink and smirk. Weiss giggled, though her blush was quite real.

"Oh you beast!" Weiss giggled, slapping him on the shoulder.

"That's what you like about me!" Sun teased back.

At the far end of the table where Teams RWBY, SSSN, and JNPR were gathered, a multitude of emotions ran through the other Hunters-in-Training.

"This is getting kind of gross, not gonna lie guys," Yang uttered.

"I think it's sweet!" Ruby giggled.

"You would," Yang groaned.

"It's so great!" Nora cheered, "Gives me ideas! Riiiight, Renny?" She pressed against her stoic best friend/crush/partner. Ren continued to eat his breakfast calmly, through a twitch had developed over his right eyebrow.

"No."

"Me too!" Nora cheered.

"I'm glad they're in a fulfilling relationship," Pyrrha said cheerfully.

"This is horrific," Neptune moaned. He perked up. "Hey Pyrrha? Wanna try to match them if you're happy for-?"

"No."

Pyrrha's tone had not changed, nor had her smile, but her eyes were terrifying enough that Neptune coughed and immediately backed down.

"Uh, Yang, babe-"

"No," Yang stated, not even breaking her stride. Neptune looked at Ruby, and Yang spoke again. "Try and die."

"Uh, um..." He looked at Nora with a smile. "Hey, Valkyrie-!"

"Try and I'll break your kneecaps," Nora said cheerfully.

Neptune looked over at Blake eagerly.

"Hey, mysterious lady, I'll-!"

Blake actually snarled at Neptune. He fled from the table. Sage and Scarlet watched him go.

"Huh," Scarlet observed, "He didn't get castrated."

"This time," Sage said with a nod.

Blake for her part was trying very hard not to look at Weiss and Sun's little performance. She kept her eyes firmly on her plate even as they carried on.

"Heehee! I love them, Sun!"

It doesn't bother me... It doesn't bother me...! Blake thought.

"Well, there's a language of cake in Atlas, so I looked up what they meant."

IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME...

"There is! ... Geez, you actually studied it, huh?" Weiss asked, blushing.

"Hey, I'll even open up a book for you, Weiss!"

"Awww... So, what does banana cake mean?"

"Well... I could show you, but I know how you are about school rules."

"S-Sun! You're so naughty!"

IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME! Blake seethed inside, as she dug her claws into the wood table.

She got up and stormed out, without a look towards the obnoxious couple. All the way outside, to the nearby park on the quad. Blake plopped herself down on a bench and glared angrily out at the picturesque scenery.

After a bit, she heard footsteps nearby. She recognized the scent of the boy who stood nearby.

"Jaune?" She asked. Jaune shrugged.

"Hey," he said quietly. "I saw you storm out... Not hard to guess why."

Blake grimaced and glared back out at the scenery.

"It's stupid," she muttered, "We weren't even together."

Jaune nodded slowly.

"Yeah, well... Neither was I with Weiss," Jaune said.

Blake winced. She'd been so wrapped up in her issues, she hadn't even...

"Sorry," she murmured. Jaune shrugged.

"Well... I mean... It's dumb, right? I never had a chance with her anyway. Why would she ever want me? Some country bumpkin."

"She..." Blake hesitated, "I mean... She did kind of like the attention. I know that."

Jaune snorted.

"Yeah... Like she liked Sun's attentions," he muttered.

Blake nodded slowly.

"I... I mean, we weren't together but he was..."

Mine, she thought, but was he really? If he was so quick to just go for Weiss... That little witch...

"Yeah," Jaune nodded, "I get it. It sucks."

Blake nodded slowly.

"I don't... I never really thought I could feel that way for someone ever again, after what I'd been through, but..."

Jaune sat down next to her. He rested a hand on her shoulder. She tensed, but... Relaxed.

"I know," Jaune said with a nod, "I-I mean, I don't know the whole story, and you don't have to tell me, but... It's all right."

Blake sighed softly. She squeezed his hand over her shoulder.

This is... Nice, she thought, Just nice warm affection, from someone without any ill intentions... Weiss really was throwing away something wonder-

A lightbulb may as well have gone off over her head. She turned to smile at Jaune.

"Jaune? I have an idea," she said.

"Uh... Sure," Jaune managed.

- - -

Weiss sighed as she sat with Sun. They were still away from the rest of their teams. Blake had left, as had Jaune.

"I'm... Starting to feel a bit bad about all this," she murmured. Sun nodded.

"Yeah... Me too." He stared at her. "If you want to stop this, I'm game."

"I..."

The thing was that, unlike Jaune or (ugh) Neptune, while Sun did flirt with her, it was... Fun. It wasn't overblown and cheesy... Well it was, but he was in on the joke. He could be lewd but fun-Winks and nudges to make her laugh. He was good at that.

And Weiss hadn't gotten to laugh a lot in her life. It was pleasant... And it became more difficult to focus on how it was making Blake feel, when she was being overwhelmed with how it was making her feel.

"I-I mean... Do you want to stop this?" Weiss asked softly. Sun stared at her for a long moment. He took a bite from his banana cupcake, and hummed.

"Well... I..."

He was hesitating. Was that a good thing or a bad thing?

"Holy-What?!" Ruby cried. Weiss and Sun looked back towards the doors.

Blake and Jaune re-entered the cafeteria... Blake holding onto the blushing Jaune's arm with a warm, happy smile and-NO BOW ON HER EARS?!

"What the-Belladonna's a Faunus?" Muttered some random student.

"Well, it was kind of obvious in hindsight, her last name and all," another said, "But why is she with Arc?!"

Blake shot Weiss a smug look, before she pulled Jaune into a toe curling kiss.

"Mmm... Thank you for giving me the courage to come out like this, Jaune," she said breathlessly, after letting Jaune's lips go. "I'm so glad I got to see the real you, and that you showed me that. It let me show who I really am."

Jaune gaped at her, obviously a bit overcome with that kiss. She stomped on his foot, and he coughed.

"Ah, uh... An-Anytime, Blake," he said, smiling genuinely despite the pain.

Blake shot a smug look over at Weiss as she led Jaune to another table. Sun and Weiss gaped after them.

"She... What?!" Weiss hissed. "She's supposed to be upset! Not... Not... Oooh!"

"Um... Should we stop this now-?" Sun asked, but Weiss shook her head.

"I-I don't-No! I mean... Unless you want to but-No!" She glared after Blake and Jaune. "She can't do that!"

At the RWBY/JNPR/SSSN table, everyone scooted away from Pyrrha as every metal utensil began to bend ominously.

- - -